The End of It All
by Not-Willing-to-Admit
Summary: The War ended, Voldemort has won & the Resistance still fights. With Severus safely ensconced as a Trusted Death Eater, he is given a damaged Albus for services rendered. AU, Dark Fic, AlbusWhumping! Featuring adults of the HP world SS, MM, AD, AW, MW. 4/2013 - Short chapter added.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer #1 - Not my Characters.

Disclaimer # 2 - AU, Dark Fic, pregnancy, Mpreg.

* * *

Six months after the Dark Lord had won The Great Magical War to End All Magical Wars, and Severus Snape, Potions Master, was still settling into his new routine. He was among the highest ranking among the Death Eaters that had survived the war, and he was trusted, as far as the Dark Lord could trust any of his supporters.

"You should never have trusted his offer of a parley, Headmaster," he thought to himself. "I warned you, Headmaster. How many times did I tell you that your naiveté would be the death of you? But it was far, far worse, Headmaster. Your willingness to sacrifice yourself for your Golden Boy, your boundless faith in Potter and in the rightness of your cause, doomed all your noble efforts to failure. Damn it, Headmaster. You were supposed to win!"

The Dark Lord's win wasn't absolute. Yes, he controlled most of magical Europe, and was steadily making inroads into worldwide domination, but there were pockets of resistance. Hogwarts still stood, a golden bastion of light against the approaching darkness, except it had been made Unplottable and Moved to an entirely new location. That Masters' Level Translocation Spell had caused quite the fuss; with the Dark Lord finally announcing via the Daily Prophet that Hogwarts had been destroyed in a final, futile act of Defiance by the Resistance. Then, the trusted Severus had cast a major spell which ensured that everyone believed that Hogwarts had been destroyed, except for those trusted souls that needed to know otherwise. With a little bit of tweaking, Severus had managed to exclude the Resistance from being affected by the spell, as well, they were trusted souls that needed to know otherwise. No doubt they had prepared for such a move by the Dark Lord, and had been prepared to counteract it, but every little bit helped.

No matter what Minerva thought, Severus Tobias Snape was still the Headmaster's man. It was just now his ability to help the Resistance was greatly impaired by the simple fact that he had no damn clue where they were.

No doubt the move of Hogwarts had been overseen by the implacable enemy known as Minerva McGonagall, who still nobly struggled in their heroic fight. When the Headmaster had been lost, and Potter had proved in spades that he had been only a very lucky baby, Minerva had picked up the pieces, marshaled her forces and had started focusing on magical guerilla warfare. She was a very savvy soul, hitting the Dark Lord in the most embarrassingly public areas.

Just the other day, Severus had stood next to what had once been a very gaudy display celebrating the Dark Lord's victory over the Headmaster. Really, it had been exceedingly tacky, what with an Anaconda slowly constricting a struggling Lion to death. Every morning, the battle started anew, and every day by sundown, the lion was dead. Then one morning, there had been a large, brightly colored Phoenix sitting on top of a dead snake that had been torn asunder in midswallow of the Lion. It had proved embarrassing that seventeen Death Eaters had attempted and failed at removing the Phoenix. At last, Severus Snape had been summoned, away from his potions and his cauldrons, and asked for help.

It was a simple spell, but he could Sense Flitwick's magical essence in the fiery Phoenix who looked so much like the deceased Fawkes that Severus had looked away. The Phoenix had valiantly attempted to save his Master when the parley had turned into a magical ambush, but his noble efforts had been for naught. Not even the infamous Albus Percival Wulferic Brian Dumbledore could hope to defeat twenty seven Death Eaters led in concert by the Dark Lord.

He hadn't been there when Headmaster had died, as he had been on another mission for the Dark Lord. If he had been, Severus would like to hope that he would have died side by side next to the Headmaster, fighting against overwhelming odds. Though to be completely honest, Severus knew himself so very well that he accepted that his idea of a noble death defending the Headmaster was a hopeless daydream. He fought in the shadows, never in the sun. If he had been there when the Headmaster had been cut down, he would have hidden his true Allegiance as the Headmaster had always instructed him to do so. Severus was the Headmaster's Secret Weapon, and he wasn't to reveal his identity needlessly even to save a life.

It was ironic, that even now, some eight months after the Headmaster had died; Severus still had to force himself to address Albus Dumbledore as anything besides, 'Headmaster'.

But he needed to focus on the living, not the deeply lamented Dead. Calm, even tempered Filius still lived, and Severus somehow prevented himself from smiling at that happy bit of news. The talented Charms Instructor had been rumored to be one of the first casualties of the War, and Severus had privately mourned his loss. But with Filius still among the living, and Minerva McGonagall leading the fight, Severus felt the very first stirrings of hope in a very long time.

He examined the spell for far too long, wanting to savor the simple beauty of the charm, to bear witness to the defiant Phoenix, and burn the sight into his empty heart. It was a beautiful act of defiance, and it was a shame that he'd have to destroy it. But maybe… maybe he could Translocate the Phoenix to Manchester? Yes, that would prove quite distressing to the Dark Lord to have the Headmaster's Familiar appearing willy-nilly throughout the countryside.

Such a spell would require a careful precision, and Severus smiled.

"A First year charms student should be able to handle this, Alecto," he snidely stated. "Perhaps I should start offering tutoring in Basic Charms in my spare time?"

Like he expected, the Carrows got their knickers in a collective twist, and stormed away, taking the rest of the Incompetent but Pure Blooded Souls with them. Pure Blooded might be the Noble ideal, but it was obvious to everyone that the Carrows in particular, and the Pure Bloodeds as a whole, suffered from too much inbreeding. Merlin's knickers, he wondered if Amycus had fathered the brat Alecto was carrying. That would be truly disgusting, but lately he had spent far too much time dealing with the Dark Lord's insane desire to produce more Pure Blooded Mages not to know that there were other pairings that were far more obscene.

Most of the female Pure Blood were now carrying, and he wondered how a pregnant Cissy Malfoy would react to the news that Lucius had fathered Pansy Parkinson's brat. Among another half dozen others.

Fortunately, since he was a Dirty Half Blood, and gay to boot, he been able to avoid finding too many women and barely pubescent girls in his bed. His look of disgust was enough to cause even a half clad Pansy Parkinson to flee in shame.

With a few quick gestures, he separated Filius' Phoenix spell from the others overlaying the statue. There was no doubt that Flitwick knew that the spell had been compromised, but Severus wondered how he'd react when he realized that the Phoenix was appearing all over the countryside. A slow sweep of his wand, with a leisurely snap of his wrist, and the Phoenix was on its merry way to Manchester. In two week's hence, it would burst out in the night sky, and then disappear, only to appear in a new town later.

The Dark Lord's followers would have a wild goose chase of epic proportions, and perhaps, perhaps, the Resistance would realize that Severus Tobias Snape was still the Headmaster's man.

* * *

"I understand that you successfully handled that Phoenix incident," Lucius Malfoy commented when he returned back to Head Quarters.

"A first year could have handled it," Severus snapped. For good measure, he allowed his black robes to billow when he strode down the hallway.

"Well, the Carrows aren't known for their techniques."

"Or their abilities," Snape quickly retorted. "Alecto is reproducing. Do you actually think her child will be magically competent enough to light a match?"

"While you were out and about, picking up after the Carrows, we captured two of the Resistance," Lucius dropped that firecracker in a hot cauldron just to see his reaction."Are they dead?" Severus was proud that his voice remained cool and composed.

"No, we decided otherwise, as they're Pure Bloods." Lucius' smile turned in a twisted smirk. "Blood traitors, but their blood is Pure. Plus in spite of the fact that they're rather prolific, their children are all more than adequate in the magical department. In fact, as much as it pains me to admit, their children are far more magically competent then the Carrows."

"You're using them as Breeding Stock?" Severus was so surprised that he almost stopped walking. He managed to prevent himself from stopping, and instead, he pretended shock. "Who is willing to be Bred to two Blood Traitors?"

"No one is willing to touch either of them, so it's been decided to let nature take its course. Their child will be raised by us, and given proper training. Perhaps that will be sufficient to prevent their child from being a Blood Traitor. I have my doubts, but I also can't be responsible for fathering every child in Head Quarters." Malfoy's voice dripped in distaste.

"Pansy's still threatening to go to Cissy?" Severus quipped.

"Cissy's known about Pansy, Millicent and the rest since the beginning of the Dark Lord's Breeding program, Severus. You may doubt my sincerity, but I do care for Cissy, and I wouldn't throw her aside for Parkinson's brat. Pansy just wants more shagging." Lucius dramatically shuddered. "I told her that she'll have to wait. In six months, we'll find out if the child is magically viable, then I'll put a bag on my head and shag her again."

"Thank you for not sending her my way again." Severus' tone was quite dry.

"She squeaks in terror whenever I ask her how that night went. Whatever did you do to her, Severus? We're friends," Lucius' voice drawled. "Tell me, so I know how to handle the tiresome wench. She's become obsessed with me. It's not my fault that my sexual techniques put other Pure Bloods to shame."

"Asking for advice on females from me?" Severus questioned. "Lucius, if people only knew, your reputation as a Lothario would be shattered."

"All too true," cheerfully admitted Lucius. "Anyway, as much as I've enjoyed our conversation, you're needed in our Prison Cell for Special Guests. Confirm the woman is fertile, as she's quite long in the tooth. I'm sure he is, as they've had seven children already."

That tidbit caused Severus to stop. He knew of two purebloods that had seven children.

"Oh, didn't I mention? Our most honored guests are Arthur and Molly Weasley," Lucius grinned. "Be careful though, we stripped both of them, and Molly isn't that attractive. After seven children, everything is not quite as perky and firm as it once was."

* * *

Arthur Weasley was not a brave man, as he had a tendency to avoid confrontation, except when his family was threatened. Now, he was angry, angry as a lion, and he almost pitied the fool that entered their cell next. Behind him, his wife shook from the cold and terror.

He turned to face her and he carefully shielded her nakedness with his own.

"It's alright, my beautiful, beautiful Mollywobbles, I love you," Arthur whispered.

"I want my clothes," Molly, never one to be sidetracked by his sweet talking, hissed. "They didn't have to take our clothes."

Arthur shushed her, gently placing two fingers on her lips to silence her. It had been a bad enough experience to be captured, but their guards had insisted on removing their clothes. That had been a shameful experience for Arthur, for while he cared not a lick for their rude remarks regarding his soft physique; their guards had been quite crude about his beloved Mollywobbles.

Merlin, she had been magnificent. Her head held high, refusing to blush even as the one female guard pointedly commented about how it was obvious Molly had breastfed. Instead, Molly had stared into his eyes, and to his horror, she had wondered if he saw her THAT way.  
_  
I see every stretch mark as a badge of honor. You were pretty as a teen, Molly, but now, you're breathtaking as a woman._

"We'll get out of here," Arthur tenderly promised.

The door to their cell opened, and Arthur deliberately pushed Molly into the corner. He'd be able to shield most of her nakedness that way. Molly was his wife, the mother of his children, only he should be granted the honor and privilege of seeing her nude.

A black cloud physically entered the room, and an all too familiar voice drawled, "Lucius? Are you attempting to kill them both? Pneumonia, Lucius?"

Severus Snape shrugged out of his black cloak and he had handed it over to Arthur. His eyes were facing the wall, deliberately not looking at the naked Weasleys.

"Take it, Arthur. Your wife will develop pneumonia otherwise," Severus insisted.

"No, I will not take anything from _**you**_," Molly snapped. "Murderer! Betrayer! I pray that Albus' spirit haunts you every night!"

For a wonder, Severus did not bother commenting on Molly's accusations. Instead, he again spoke to Arthur.

"Arthur, take my robe. It is cold, and damp. I regret that the guards thought it necessary to strip you. It truly wasn't necessary."

Severus dropped the robe, and Arthur grabbed it. Quickly, he put it on his wife.

"You will wear it, Mollywobbles," he insisted. "I don't want you flaunting yourself in front of him. Everyone knows that I'm the luckiest man in the world to be married to you, but I refuse to let them know how lucky."

"I am going to be quite ill," Malfoy snidely inserted.

"You will give him a robe also," Molly insisted.

Severus' left eyebrow quirked.

"Do you want tea also?" He questioned.

"That would be quite cordial of you, as we have not eaten all day," Molly demanded, regal as any Muggle Queen.

Her bravery earned a grudging laugh of approval from Severus. He duplicated the robe, and then called out, "Nessie!"

A small female House Elf appeared. She had the same plaintive appearance that most of her kind did, with large brown eyes, though most House Elves possessed two great, big batlike ears. Not so, Nessie. She possessed one large ear and one badly disfigured ear.

"What did you do to that poor creature?" Arthur softly questioned.

"Previous owner who felt that her service was lacking and that she needed sufficient motivation," Severus explained, over Nessie's high pitched squeaks that her Master had not hurt her. "Her service was given to me. Nessie, please bring our two guests tea."

"Yes, Nessie is proud to serve!"

The House Elf disappeared and then Severus asked, "Both presentable? No spare bits showing?"

"Yes, they're clothed," Lucius announced. "Both are a long way from presentable though."

"Very well, I just need to examine both of you," Severus explained. He did a subtle casting on both, and then nodded his head. "Both are obviously quite fertile. I'd say tomorrow is probably the day this cycle that she's most likely to conceive."

"I beg your pardon?" Arthur roared.

Molly's lips were pressed together tightly, and Severus was glad that he had his wand in his hand. The witch was in a killing mood.

"Simple fact is we need more Pure Blooded Mages. You're both healthy breeding stock, as your fine litter…" Lucius stepped back from as a very angry Arthur Weasley went for his throat. For Arthur's trouble, he was shocked and slammed into the wall. "Temper, temper, though feisty is a good characteristic in a Breeding Stallion, much like docility is good in a Brood Mare."

This time, Lucius was not quite as quick with his wand, as a not-so-docile Molly Weasley landed a powerful punch on his perfect glass chin. In retaliation for her victory, Lucius again turned his wand on Arthur, causing him to seize and cry out in pain.

"One more step, Molly Weasley, and I'll destroy his mind. We're interested in his bollocks, not his mind," Lucius hissed.

The witch jumped away from Lucius and then knelt next to her husband. Severus' ill fitting robe displayed various pieces of Molly's flesh as she helped Arthur into a sitting position.

"Molly, love, don't do that again, I beg you," Arthur whispered. "It was bravely done though."

With a pop, Nessie returned with a heavily loaded tray.

"Nessie returned fast?" She anxiously squeaked.

"Yes, you've done fine," Severus assured her, which earned a happy squeak from Nessie. "Now, I'll be leaving you with your tea."

* * *

He stayed up almost the entire night striving to find some way to assist Molly and Arthur Weasley in escaping from their command performance. Nessie, his rather insistent House Elf had badgered him so intensely about not sleeping, he finally ordered her to not speak again until he gave her permission. She gave him a sad look, but kept her mouth shut. Instead, she kept plumping the pillows on his bed, and turning down the covers. She even went so far as to give him, unasked, his dressing gown,

Damning himself for a coward, he could find no way that he could help them escape and not reveal his involvement. Another plan was required.

Molly was older than he was, and while he had known far older witches to give birth, there was there was always the possibility of deadly complications.

Yes, he could kill Molly Weasley, and claim the death was due to a pulmonary embolism. Her death would also require the death of Arthur Weasley, who being so besotted with his wife, would probably expire from grief on the very spot. He could dump their bodies at the former location of Hogwarts, which no doubt Minerva was watching. Perhaps she even had put a Taboo on her name. Yes, Severus would call out her name, dump the bodies and let her find them.

Hopefully, she'd remember to check both Weasleys for a pulse before she buried them.

Else there would be hell to pay when the two Weasleys woke.

* * *

The Dark Lord decided he needed to watch the consummation, to ensure that Arthur didn't spill before…he should.

Lucky him, Severus growled.

He was gay, he didn't appreciate watching a heterosexual couple have sex… no make love…Arthur Weasley, though drugged to the gills with every aphrodisiac known to magic kind, was refusing to be anything else besides his usual plodding, completely systematic self.

It was obscene, watching a drugged, middle aged married couple making love in order to produce a healthy Pure Blood child in order to continue a mad man's dynasty based on cruelty and hate. When at long last, Arthur came with a soft cry and a full body shudder, Severus was quite prepared to leave.

Instead the two Weasleys cuddled together for a bit and then began making love_**again**_.

After the fourth time the two Weasleys made love, Severus had left in a huff. To hell with the Dark Lord, he had seen more than enough. Arthur Weasley was apparently hung like a stallion and insatiable to boot! They were red headed rabbits! No wonder they had so many spawn!

* * *

After a sufficient amount of time, Severus confirmed that Molly Weasley was once again expecting. The two Weasleys were quite subdued upon receiving the good news, though Arthur Weasley hesitantly smiled at his wife.

"You're such a sexy vixen when you're carrying." Arthur whispered to Molly.

Severus managed to keep his face perfectly schooled though he was beginning to find the Weasleys rather cloying.

"Come on love, let me hold you," Arthur pleaded. Molly slowly went to her husband's arm and he hugged her tightly. She clung to him, and Severus looked away from them. They did deserve some privacy.

"Will you be so kind as to get her some decent clothing, Severus?" Arthur's voice was perfectly calm, and Severus once again marveled at the almost inhuman strength Arthur Weasley possessed when it came to his family. Other, more respected Wizards would be cowering and weeping. Not so Arthur Weasley, as he needed to protect his wife. "She'll be needing proper clothes that fit. Your old robe, while warm, will not be adequate covering soon enough."

"I can arrange for that," Severus agreed, though inwardly he was praying that Minerva McGonagall would have to deal with that particular problem.

"Thank you. I am indebted," Arthur's voice was quite appreciative.

"Don't be indebted to _**him**_," Molly spat. She was on the verge of tears, and Arthur began rocking her. "He did this to us. Bill and Fleur were taking about children. We were to be grandparents, Arthur!"

She began weeping, and Arthur shook his head.

"Please leave us, Severus."

"I'll send Nessie with food and medication. She'll need to take the medication for a healthy child," Severus instructed.

Arthur Weasley nodded his head once, and then Severus left the cell. It was time for him to put the first part of his plan into effect. He prayed that he was strong enough to do what must be done.

_Damn you, _Headmaster_. Why did you ever trust him under a parley flag?_

* * *

He was deeply asleep when he was woken by Amycus Carrow.

"There's a problem in the cells," Amycus informed him. "It's urgent. It's the Weasley woman. I think she's dead."

_"**What**?_" Severus' disbelieving response was completely truthful. It took a moment for his mind to wake, and he realized that this was the night he had planned to kill Molly Weasley. "Don't you have a mediwitch?"

No, Gaeta, the mediwitch was not in Head Quarters tonight, as she had been sent to Devonshire to tend to the assorted wounded injured due to a Rebel uprising.

"You're the closest we have to a trained Mediwitch. I think she's dead, Severus!"

"With your fine analytical mind, I am sure you are correct," Severus snapped. "Nessie! I need you to take me to the prison cell where the Weasley woman is. I may need your assistance."

The House Elf ran to his side, grabbed his hand and Apparated him to the cell. Arthur Weasley was ashen, and he was holding a nonresponsive Molly Weasley in his arms. Her fiery red hair was such a noticeable contrast to her cold, pale skin.

"Everyone leave," Severus snapped to the large crowd that was standing around, gawking at the free show. He then sighed as he noticed that his House Elf was about to leave along with the horde. "Not you, Nessie. You're to help me."

"Molly, oh Molly, Molly," Arthur's stricken voice would haunt Severus' nightmares for many nights to come. "Oh, no, Molly, you're not breathing. Love, love, come back to me."

"Arthur," Severus insisted, as he knelt down next to the grieving Arthur. "Let me see her, Arthur."

"Severus, you've got to save her. SEVERUS!" Arthur screamed.

"Give her to me, Arthur. I need to look at her," Severus repeated. He kept repeating his instructions to Arthur until he was at last holding Molly Weasley.

She was ice cold. No breath was passing through her lips, and from all appearances, she was quite dead.

"What happened?" Severus questioned. He began a cursory exam, not wanting to take too long; else someone might decide to offer assistance. Time was of the essence, and he still needed to kill Arthur Weasley.

"She had stomach pains tonight. Not really bad ones, but still pains. She'd normally get them in the early part of her pregnancies. The Healers called it round ligament pain?"

"Arthur," Severus carefully placed Molly Weasley on the ground. "There's nothing I can do. She's dead, Arthur."

"No, Severus. No, NOOO!" Arthur grabbed Molly's body and began rocking it. "No, no, NO! I can't live without you, Molly. You can't leave me."

His grief was so powerful that Severus was beginning to get affected.

"Arthur, do you want to join her?" Severus softly questioned.

"Yes, Severus. Kill me, kill me now. Like you killed Albus," Arthur pleaded. "But make it quick. Oh Molly, my sweet, sweet Molly."

"I didn't kill the Headmaster, Arthur," Severus whispered. He pulled a small vial out of his pocket, and he gave it to Arthur. "Drink this before the others come back. You'll be with your Molly soon enough."

Arthur drank the potion quickly, and before long his cold body was lying next to his wife.

"Together in life, together in death," Severus whispered. "Nessie, you are to tell no one that I killed Arthur Weasley. It was a kindness, what I did."

He kept his voice cold and emotionless, as he knew that would scare the House Elf into behaving.

"No, no, no! Nessie won't say." The House Elf pleaded for him to believe her.

"Very well. I want you to prepare both of them for burial. Clean robes for both of them, and I'll create two masks. We'll be delivering their bodies back to their friends," Severus explained. "You're the only one to touch their bodies besides me. No one else."

She nodded her understanding, and Severus quickly stood, brushing the dirt off his clothes.

Headmaster_, I'm reduced to this, completely dependant on a House Elf. But I'm still loyal, _Headmaster_. Do you look down upon me with approval? Do you at last trust your Severus?_

"I'll need to inform Amycus of what happened." Severus announced.

* * *

"Minerva, someone's calling your name. Repeatedly and very loudly," Filius explained. The Charms Instructor looked disgustingly bright eyed considering how early it was in the morning.

Minerva McGonagall, leader of a rag tag Rebellion, took another sip of her tea, before she decided to answer.

"I've been hearing it for the last fifteen minutes. It's Severus Snape." Her voice was cold, and she put her tea cup down on the table hard enough to slosh the tea over the side of the cup. "He wants to meet me at the location of the old Hogwarts. He's requesting a Parley."

"Parley?" Harry Potter snapped. "He wants a Parley truce? After what he did to Albus?"

"Enough, Mr. Potter. He's calling for me, not for you. Filius, I want thirteen of the Order for backup." Minerva snippily informed him.

"Already assembled," Filius explained.

"I'm coming with you," insisted Harry.

"Once again, Mr. Potter, I have to remind you that he's requesting a Parley with me, not you. Is he requesting a Parley for himself? Or for You Know Who?" Minerva questioned.

"Neither. He's requesting a Parley for someone else. He says that he has two of our Fallen, and he wishes to return their bodies to us due to his great respect for the deceased."

"Could he be possibly returning Albus' body?" Minerva questioned Filius.

"It's been almost a year, Minerva, I highly doubt it. Keeping Albus' body gives You Know Who great power," Filius' voice was soft as he gently shot down her hopes.

"Very well. I'll meet with him. Mr. Potter, you are ordered not to follow. If I find that you or any of your friends has followed us to this meeting, you will be punished," she stated.

"Will you be giving me lines, Professor McGonagall?" Harry gently quipped, reminding her that she was no longer his instructor

"Much worse," she promised.

* * *

The early morning was cold and damp, and the two bodies were carefully positioned at what would have been the entranceway to Hogwarts. While the building was no longer physically there, he felt the spiritual presence of the wards, blocking him from entering its Hallowed Grounds.

_I'm home,_he thought_. Yet, _Headmaster_, they have banned me from the one place that I knew to be a haven for me. _Headmaster_, are you glad that your Severus is still loyal? Does my never-ending pain slake your thirsty need for retribution?_

He felt Minerva Arrive and he held out his hands, palms facing outward.

"I am unarmed," he loudly stated.

"You will not be harmed," Minerva answered. "Though most doubt my sanity for holdng to that part of the Parley Accords."

Minerva looked at the two bodies, clad in Death Eater Robes and Masks, and then she looked at Severus.

"Thank you for returning them." Her voice was soft.

"Don't you even want to know who they are?" Severus questioned.

"No, it just matters that we can take them home." Minerva easily answered. "May I ask you a question?"

"You always asked me questions, without this unexpected and unnecessary urge to ask permission," Severus retorted.

"Why did you betray Albus? He trusted you," she softly questioned. "I want to know. I'm trying to understand."

"I did not kill the Headmaster, Minerva! I did not betray him!" His voice grew angry, and he saw movement in the darkness beyond her. "There was to be no one else here!"

There was an answering flare of magic from a wand, and Severus stepped back.

"You've broken the Parley Accords, Minerva. I **never** thought you'd do that." His voice was cold, but he let respect color his tone. Oh, steely eyed Minerva, the pragmatist, who had balanced the ever optimistic Headmaster. The Dark Lord would find her a tough meal to chew and digest.

With a swift gesture, Severus disappeared.

"Bloody hell," she cursed. "Who broke the Accords? Answer me? Answer me?"

Bill Weasley ignored her as he ran toward the bodies.

"Don't touch them, they might be Booby trapped," Remus Lupin yelled. "BILL!"

The eldest Weasley son ignored Remus, and he pulled the face mask off the body closest to him.

"Mum," he whispered. "MUM!"

He reached for the other mask that hid the other person's face and he removed it.

"Dad," he whispered. He pulled their bodies close to him, and he began screaming. "HE KILLED MY PARENTS!"

* * *

They brought the Weasleys home to Hogwarts, the thirteen members of the Order providing a rough sort of Honor Guard. The Weasleys had disappeared some two months previously, and while Minerva had prayed that they were safe, her practical side had known the truth. As she feared, the horde of Weasleys and their assorted friends met them when they returned.

Charlie Weasley had everyone under control. A few of the boys were weeping, not ashamed to show their tears.

"We'd like to see them," Charlie quietly stated.

"I want Poppy to examine them first, Charles," Minerva's voice was soft as she denied his request. "We can clean them and make them presentable."

"I don't care if they're presentable," Ron Weasley spat. "I want to see them."

"In time, Ronald. Poppy needs to examine them, and I want Filius' input also. Take them to the Infirmary. Bill, you're to stay with your family now."

As expected, Bill began to protest, but she quickly made mincemeat of him.

"Your failure to act appropriately at the Parley could have been the death of not only you, but all of the Order Members present. You didn't even check to see if the bodies had been bespelled before you had to check to see if they were your parents. I understand, Bill, your concern for your parents, but you need to be more cautious. With your reputation as an experienced Curse Breaker, I had thought I could trust you in this matter. I was wrong," she slowly admitted. "Go with your family, Bill. They need you."

Bill nodded his head, acknowledging the truth in what she said.

Their arrival at the Infirmary found Pomona Sprout waiting for them.

"I'll help with Molly," Pomona Sprout explained. "Get her presentable for her family."

"Thank you," Minerva sincerely thanked the Herbology Instructor.

"Sirius and I will help with Arthur," Remus Lupin offered.

The werewolf's help she had already anticipated, but Sirius' offer was unexpected. She turned her eyes unto Sirius Black, who had the grace to look embarrassed.

"It's the least what I can do for him," Sirius slowly agreed. "He took care of Harry all those years I couldn't do so, and now I can finally repay him."

"Thank you," was all she said.

"Severus returned their bodies to us?" Filius' high pitch voice carried in the all too quiet Infirmary. "Minerva, I'll want to hear everything that happened after the Weasleys are prepared."

"Yes," Minerva answered. Her head was pounding, and she needed an analgesic, but Poppy was sternly rationing her potions. Poppy was far too worried about the possibility of the Rebound Affect, where the headaches would return with three times the force as her body adapted to the various painkillers.

"Your headache is back, Min?" Filius questioned. "Let me massage your temples tonight."

She was about to thank him, when Remus loudly exclaimed, "I don't believe that they're dead, Poppy. Arthur's mouth has a very odd odor. It has the scent of silver, and I burnt my skin when I touched Arthur's face. It's only a minor burn, not as severe if I had touched silver directly."

"Silver?" Minerva questioned.

Pomona leaned over Arthur, and she sniffed.

"I don't smell silver, but I do smell powdered root of asphodel, which is used in the…"

"The Draught of Living Death," exclaimed Poppy. "Let me see, let me see."

She began casting intricate spells, while Filius inserted his opinion. "A silver dagger is used in the creation of that particular potion."

"It's not it. It is, but it isn't. Severus had a tendency to modify potions to suit his purpose. The boy was quite talented," Poppy admitted.

"Though evil to the core," Pomona inserted. "He did betray Albus."

"He claims that he didn't," Minerva dropped that bomb into the conversation. "If the Weasleys are in fact, not dead, but merely unconscious, I might actually believe his protestations of innocence in that matter. Albus always trusted him."

"We've got a dilemma on our hands," Remus' voice was quite soft when he spoke. "If the Weasleys are actually alive, the news may get back to He Who Must Not Be Named. Severus has put himself into a very risky position."

"They'll have to stay dead," Minerva quickly decided. "No, we're not killing them, but their children can not be told the truth. For all purposes, Arthur and Molly Weasley are dead. We will bury an empty casket, have the ceremony and then we'll resurrect them after we win our war."

"We'll need to make this a Secret," Filius announced. "We'll need to cast the spell before anyone leaves the room. Anyone disagree?"

"Yes, their children should know that they're alive," Sirius protested.

"If I could trust them, I would," Minerva announced. "Bill broke the Parley Accords and drew his wand on an unarmed Severus. They're too volatile, and not very good actors. We need their grief to be real, Sirius. If we're betrayed from within, we'll need to keep Severus' possible loyalties a secret."

"What bloody bastards we are," Sirius snapped. "Letting them believe that their parents are DEAD. Do we lock the Weasleys in a room until the war ends? I don't envy Arthur that experience."

"Yes, Molly would go absolutely barmy," Remus admitted with a dry laugh.

"Change their appearances. I can glamour them, and we'll add them to the Secret Spell. Remember, you don't need to be conscious to be part of the Spell. We hold their hands when I bond the spell, and they'll be part of it."

"What if they're really dead?" Pomona questioned.

Poppy quickly did another round of diagnostic spells, and she shook her head.

"They're alive, barely. Molly's results are odd, which I'll have to investigate further. They'll remain in this state for probably another six hours, so we can have the children view their parents, have the funeral, and get the two Weasleys into an isolated room where they can recover."

"Room of Requirement!" Sirius inserted. "This sounds like a perfect need for that room."

"Yes, perfect, Sirius!"

"Come now, let's clean them up," Pomona announced. "We've got plans to make, and we can't be dallying."

"Let's put the two of them together," Remus decided. "Arthur's arm around Molly, and the two of them holding hands."

* * *

The Dark Lord ordered Severus to appear before him. It was the day after he had murdered both Weasleys and during a moment of sheer terror, Severus wondered if the Dark Lord had discovered his plot.

No, the Dark Lord would have executed him, not called him in for High Tea.

"Severus, I'm rather disappointed that the Weasley woman died," the Dark Lord purred.

"It happens to old sows," Severus sniped. "You overbreed them, and they become more susceptible to health issues."

"I was planning on having you raise the child," the Dark Lord explained. "In spite of your mixed heritage, you are far more proficient then many of the Pure Bloods. I had hoped that your positive influence would have molded the child into respectability. But alas, it was not to be."

Severus, not sure of how this conversation was heading, decided it was in his best interest to keep his mouth shut.

"You handled that Phoenix matter easily when Amycus couldn't. His mind is weak, and his magic… best left uncommented upon. But you, Severus,…"

The Dark Lord stared at Severus appraisingly, and Severus felt uneasy That Stare was akin to… no… the Dark Lord wasn't …. He couldn't be….

"I understand that you are homosexual, and unwilling to make use of any of the available females," the Dark Lord questioned.

Oh no, Severus thought. His mind was racing, and he wondered if the Dark Lord was about to proposition him. Merlin knew that Bellatrix had done everything except dance the Dance of the Seven Veils in the Dark Lord's Throne Room to attract the Dark Lord's interest. Yet, now Bellatrix carried a Goyle or two in her belly.

"I am of the robe lifting persuasion," Severus easily admitted. "As for not making use of the available females, I simply can not perform with them."

"Yes, even Pansy Parkinson wasn't enough to tempt you," the Dark Lord's voice was amused.

"Pansy is… " Severus shuddered.

"A slut," the Dark Lord easily admitted. "Is there anyone of the robe lifting persuasion among my followers that interests you?"

"I believe that I'm the only one that has that particular proclivity," Severus easily admitted. "At my age, you can pretty much guess the person's inclination."

"A shame," the Dark Lord admitted then pondered for a bit. "I wish to reward such a loyal follower. Therefore you'll find a bedwarmer in your bed when you return to your quarters. I'm afraid that its mind was damaged in battle, but the body is surprisingly sound. It will make a suitable Vessel."

"Vessel?" Severus questioned.

"For your child. The Vessel is Pure Blood, and possessed considerable skill when he had a mind."

"Thank you for this reward," Severus smoothly answered. Left unsaid was that the Dark Lord was quite barmy if he thought two men could make a baby.

"This will hurt," the Dark Lord admitted. He took out his wand and pointed it at Severus' chest. "But it's necessary."

Severus hadn't managed to grab his wand before the Dark Lord hexed him. He fell to the floor and then darkness overwhelmed him.

* * *

"Wakey, wakey," Lucius Malfoy's voice drawled. "You've been unconscious for a considerable length of time, Severus."

Severus woke then, and Lucius laughed.

"What happened?" Severus questioned.

"The Dark Lord decided you were worthy of a high honor, but you were required to make a donation."

Memories came rushing back to his mind, and he winced in embarrassment. That was why his pants were sticky.

"I dropped off your new friend to your quarters. I also took the liberty to ask Nessie to do something with his hair. It was in such knots, and he didn't look… attractive." Lucius then ran his fingers through his long, blond hair and laughed again.

"Come along now, you need to return to your quarters."

Severus did a quick cleaning spell, and then he declined Lucius' offer to walk him to his quarters. Malfoy was visibly disappointed that he wasn't to witness Severus meeting the Vessel, but he dared not press the issue too far. Severus, after all, was held in high regard by the Dark Lord.

He entered his quarters, and he heard a mewling noise.

"It's allright, Master here! Master help!"

Nessie bounced over to where he was, and she was quivering.

"He hurts! Nessie tried, but the pain still there!"

"Very well, I'll see what I can do," Severus announced. The last thing he wanted was a mewling, sniveling roommate.

He walked into his bedroom, and his heart shattered. There, crumbled into the fetal position, both hands pressed against his belly, his long hair neatly braided and gaily beribboned was…

"Headmaster," Severus whispered.

And the shattered wreck that had once been the most powerful wizard in Europe looked at him with vacant, blue eyes.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer # 1 Not my characters.

Disclaimer # 2 non con. Mpreg. Preg. AU, Dark Fic

* * *

Severus Snape entered his quarters, and he hissed when he heard a mewling noise. To his surprise, the noise wasn't coming from Nessie the House Elf.

"It's allright, Master here! Master help!"

Nessie bounced over to where he was, and she was quivering in excitement and fear.

"He hurts! Nessie tried, but the pain still there!"

"Very well, I'll see what I can do," Severus announced. The last thing he wanted was a mewling, sniveling roommate.

He walked into his bedroom, and his heart shattered. There, crumbled into the fetal position, both hands pressed against his belly, his long hair neatly braided and gaily beribboned was…

"Head Master," Severus whispered.

And the shattered wreck that had once been the most powerful wizard in Europe looked at him with vacant, blue eyes.

_Oh Merlin. What have they done to you?_

He knelt next to the whimpering man, and carefully, he pulled out his wand. The Head Master reacted just as badly as Severus had feared that he would, screeching and mewling, as he frantically crawled away from Severus. Not having the time to finesse the situation with any sort of delicacy, Severus swished and flicked his wand. Dumbledore collapsed in mid-crawl, and Severus walked toward him.

"It's all right," he whispered, trying to make his voice soothing. "I'm turning you over now, so I can help you."

Dumbledore was dead weight, and his blue eyes were wide in terror and fear. Severus managed to roll him over, and he placed the wand against the Head Master's belly. With a soft, singsong spell of his own creation, he was able to diagnose the reason for Dumbledore's pain as his nascent womb.

_Oh Merlin. What have they done to you? Merlin blast it, I need to get you to Minerva and Poppy!  
_

With careful, deliberate movements of his wand, he was able to soothe the Head Master's pain away. Wand waving would provide a temporary cessation of pain, and the Head Master's whimpers soon ceased. Hopefully he would have enough time to brew a tincture before the pains returned.

"I need to call you something," he whispered, his voice shaky. "You're not the Head Master; I can't call you Albus, as you're merely a shell. Perhaps…Al?"

Al stared at him, and Severus pointed at himself.

"Sev," he carefully enunciated. He pointed at Al and then stated, "Al."

Nessie the House Elf peered around the doorway, and Sev realized that the House Elf wanted to be introduced to her new charge.

"Nessie," he clearly stated. "Nessie, this is Al. You're to keep an eye on him. It's very important that you do so. Al, Nessie will take care of you."

Al just stared at them both, and Severus held out his hands. "I need to check you, Al," he sing songed.

There was no response from Al, and Severus gently put his hands on both sides of Al's head.

"Look at me," he said in that same sing song tone. It took some time, but at last, Al stared at him with soulless eyes.

With a softly spoken spell, he Entered Al's mind. Only once before had he Entered the Head Master's mind, and he hoped to find a unchanged mental landscape. The Head Master's mind had tasted lemony, like sherbet lemons, and it had been full of tart whimsy and ancient knowledge. Severus had been humbled by the experience because the Head Master's absolute trust in him had given him unfettered access to his mind. It had taken him time to recover from the surreal experience, and the entire time he had been recuperating, Dumbledore had held on his hand and had reassured him.

"The first time takes some people like this," Dumbledore had assured him, before the Head Master had given him a wicked smirk. "It's always best for your first time to be with someone you trust."

Smoothly, he further Delved into Al's mind, hoping for the tart taste of citrus, for his mind to be brushed by a fleeting memory that belonged to the Head Master. There had to be something left of the Head Master.

He could not be…_**gone**_.

There was nothing, except for the metallic taste of blood, and the overwhelming smell of ashes.

There was _**nothing**_. The Head Master's mind had gone a Burton, apparently.  
_**  
Al trusts Sev. **_He gently deliberated on that idea, his thoughts filling the vast emptiness that had once been the Head Master's psyche, and then he began repeating the mantra, _**Al trusts Sev. Sev protects Al.**_

Al's tense body relaxed as Severus mentally crooned that concept to him. In time, with Nessie's help, Severus managed to pull Al off the floor. It might have been his imagination, but he thought Al looked somewhat calmer.

"Wheres will he be sleeping? Does he needs Nessie's bed?" Nessie nervously questioned. "He cans has Nessie' nice, fine bed. Nessie's bed are too good for a House Elf. Makes nice bed for Master's new friend."

Nessie had been used to sleeping on the floor, on a small, threadbare rug next to her late mistress' bed. When he had first acquired her, Severus had promptly given her a comfortable mattress, pillows and blankets. He had attempted to do more, wanting to duplicate how the Hogwart House Elves had been treated, but Nessie had nearly become completely undone with his small bit of consideration. Her hysterics had stopped after he promised that she could sleep in his bedroom. It wasn't like he had been planning on entertaining anyone and a loyal House Elf might prove useful.

"First of all, he needs clothes," Severus decided.

_**Head Master, you used to love to wear your colorful robes with spangles and sequins. I was a black crow to your colorful peacock. They put you in dirty rags to shame you, but there isn't enough of you left to actually notice. But I perceive the insult. I will reap your vengeance for you, Head Master. On the day that Minerva proudly displays the banner of a Rising Phoenix from the rooftop of this castle, you will be avenged. **_

"Master's blond friend drops clothes off when he broughts him here." Nessie announced. "They is in a big bag, and Nessie unpacks them."

"Are they similar to what he's wearing?" Severus asked, trying to keep his voice neutral. Al's ash colored robe was torn and stained.

"Yes," Nessie admitted. "I cleans them all, and fixed what I could. I put Al into the bestest robe I could find. But he was in such pain, he messed his robe!"

"Tomorrow, we'll need to get him new clothes that fit," Severus decided. "Nessie, you will measure him, so I can buy him clothes."

He looked at Al, and though he anticipated no answer, Severus still asked, "Are you hungry?"

Al stared at him, his eyes empty and vacant. His mouth opened and then closed.

"Food first," Severus informed Nessie. "Then he's washed, changed and put to bed."

"Where will he be sleeps?" Nessie questioned. The House Elf was trying not to be obvious, but Severus thought that Nessie was worried about the possibility of losing her little nest, rather than being a good hostess to the newest addition to the dysfunctional Snape family.

"Your bed is still your own," Severus assured Nessie, who nearly quivered herself to death in her happiness. "Tonight, I guess, he'll stay in my bed."

Nessie gasped and blushed from the tip of her one large bat ear all the way down to her crooked right big toe that had been deliberately broken and incorrectly set by her previous mistress.

"If Master wishes to do…." Nessie paused, and then whispered, "Inny-Outy with Al, Nessie will stays in the kitchen."

Only through far too many years of teaching Longbottom, Potter and assorted Weasleys was Severus able to keep his voice composed.

"There will be no sexual intercourse, or as you so quaintly put it, Inny-Outy. There will be no Hanky Panky either. Having sex with him would be no better than _**molesting**_ a defenseless child," Severus growled.

Well, maybe he wasn't successful in keeping his emotions as composed as he had hoped, for Nessie anxiously took a step backwards.

"Nessie no means to imply that kind Master is that type! Please forgives Nessie! Master's blond friend said that you'd be doing Inny-Outy all night long! Nessy didn't know he was joking!" The House Elf begged plaintively. "Most generous Master is kind and handsome! Forgives Nessie for not knowing better!"

He had gone astray in his head. Albus Dumbledore was not dead, but instead, severely traumatized and quite possibly brain damaged, and Severus' personal House Elf thought Severus was kind, generous and_**handsome**_. Oh, and there was the distinct chance that the Dark Lord had succeeded in…. Merlin help him, impregnating the Head Master.

With_**Severus'**_ child.

Well, as Head of his Dysfunctional Little Family, Severus needed to ensure that his family was healthy and safe. Yes, that included the House Elf.

"Nessie, please have dinner with me. You will help feed Al," he loudly explained, as Nessie nearly went into raptures of joy that she was allowed to have dinner with her Master. "Do you have much experience with children?"

"Yes, my first mistress have seven!" Nessie joyfully explained. "Nessie feed, bathed, clothes all the little babies! Nessie read to them!"

The House Elf's dark eyes were joyful, remembering happy times reading to the spawn of the monster that had burned her ear as she had deemed that Nessie wasn't motivated enough. Merlin's bloody scrote, he was probably the only fool who actually felt pity for the House Elves as they reminded him too much of himself. For a magical species to take on the role of humanity's servants there could be no reason except that it was an act of supreme penance. His own hair shirt had often chafed him raw over the years, but the Head Master had never burnt his ear off in a fit of hormonal pique.

Severus deeply regretted that he lacked the necessary skill to restore Nessie's ear, but Nessie had appreciated the healing salve he had given her. It had softened the scar tissue somewhat, and eased the inflammation, but it was still an ugly disfigurement.

"Well Nessie, you have a new baby to oversee. Make up a list of what you think he'll need."  
_**  
Merlin's scrote! He better be toilet trained! **_

"Al is not a baby!" Nessie exclaimed in shock. "Master making fun of Nessie!"

"Nessie, Al is an adult, yes, but his mind is damaged. Al will need you to keep an eye on him, to ensure that he is safe. I keep many supplies for my potions here. He must not get into my work room."

"No, Master! Nessie watch Al! Keep Al safe!" Nessie promised. "Master? May Nessie ask kind, handsome Master a question?"

I'll probably regret it, Severus thought, but he assured her that she could speak.

"Is Al having Master's baby? Master's blond friend says he is, but Al is a boy, and he won't answer when I asked him. Nessie cleaned him earlier, and saw Al's boy parts. Al doesn't have girl parts!"

"He might be," Severus regretfully admitted. "It's still quite early, so it's not confirmed yet."

Nessie's undamaged ear straightened, and she beamed. She grasped both her hands together, and she nearly bounced in her excitement.

"Nessie will be able to hear baby's heart beat! Quite soon! May Nessie bond to Master's baby? Nessie swear loyalty to baby, and he'll be Nessie's Master if you gone. Nessie wants her Master's family to serve. Nessie doesn't want to be passed on to another family. Not again! Not so soon! Handsome Master is so kind to Nessie!"

"We'll discuss it later, as I need to know exactly what it entails for you to bond with… the child," Severus paused, and then attempted to smile at Al. His smile was rusty, as he rarely smiled, but Al was staring at him. "Al, it's time for dinner. Food?"

He motioned as though he was eating, and Al continued to stare at him.

_**Head Master, remember when you were young, you shone like the sun? Now there's a look in your eyes, like black holes in the sky.**_

"Come on, you crazy diamond," Severus gently ordered. He carefully guided Al to the dinning room, and sat him down to the meal.

* * *

_**  
**_Dinner had been messy. Al needed help using the utensils and there had been one episode where Al had shoveled a bit too much in his mouth and had begun to choke. Fortunately, a quick casting of _Anapneo_ kept Al among the land of the living.

"Eating properly is an acquired art," Severus graciously announced to Nessie, who was fearful that she was at fault for Al's near death experience. "It is best to assume that he needs assistance with tasks that you'd normally assume that he wouldn't."

Ignoring's Nessie's obsessive mumbles about what a kind, generous and handsome Master he was, Severus couldn't help but stare at Al. It was really the first time he was able to catalog the physical damage the Head Master had endured.

His hands, Merlin's bloody scrote, did they have to break his hands? The Head Master's formerly long and graceful hands were now gnarled and stiff. Grasping his fork took considerable effort, and Al used it with a stabbing motion. He had lost a great deal of weight, and he ate as though he was starving. At first hesitant at eating, Al began shoveling the food into his mouth at a faster and a faster rate, as though fearful that it would taken away from him. Severus had finally ordered Nessie to feed Al, as the way Al was inhaling his food, Severus knew that Al would end up with a wicked case of gut rot.

His long hair was now completely snow white, though it was now braided with a riotous blizzard of brightly colored ribbons. Even his beard had not escaped Nessie's creativity, as it was a multitude of tiny plaits, neatly restrained with a beard tie.

_**Minerva, I am almost glad that you are not here to see the Head Master. They've turned him in a fool, dressed him in motley, and the hair ribbons are the final insult. Oh Minerva, you'd be furious, and your righteous anger would wipe this cesspool clean.**_

His face was heavily lined, and rather gaunt. Al had also succeeded in smearing his face and his beard with mushy peas. That pathetic sight was the final straw for Severus, and he had to look away when he spoke, "Nessie, it might be necessary to cut his beard down to manageable levels if he can't keep it clean."  
**  
**_**Head Master, you had always taken such pride in your beard and your hair. You kept it clean and I never once saw it stained or dirty.**_

When the meal was finished, Nessie took Al away to be bathed and changed. Severus was sipping at his glass of wine when he heard a knock on the door.

"It's Lucius, may I come in?" asked the silken voice of Lucius Malfoy.

"Yes," Severus decided.

With a quick gesture of his wand, his quarters were soon suitable for entertaining.

* * *

Lucius Malfoy smiled upon entering Severus' quarters.

"I was curious how you made out with your new… bed mate." Lucius softly questioned. His eyes were narrowed as he deliberately examined Severus closely.

No doubt the gossiper would tell everyone, Severus mentally growled.

"I must admit that I am quite uncertain about the wisdom of using Dumbledore as the Vessel," Severus smoothly admitted. "While it is poetic justice for him to carry my child."

Lucius just smiled, and Severus once again damned the day he had fallen under Malfoy's spell. What with Malfoy's classical good looks, the much younger Severus had become too easily infatuated with Head Boy Malfoy.

"Though I worry, Lucius," Severus admitted slowly. He had a brainstorm just now, and he couldn't wait to see Lucius' panicked reaction to the news. "Most fertility spells are unable to extend the period that females are fertile. After the age of seventy, they can no longer normally reproduce. But Dumbledore is close to one hundred and twenty, and yet, the Dark Lord has apparently succeeded in ensuring that a rather ancient male is capable of carrying a child…"

Easily, Lucius Malfoy parroted the company line, "Whatever the Dark Lord decides to do, he has a sound reason. You should be honored that you were chosen to be the father of the child…"

"I was just wondering. There is a distinct lack of females in our ranks. Thirty percent of our rank is fertile females, and they are being constantly bred due to the need to increase the small number of Pure Bloods. I fear that if the Dark Lord is successful with this breeding, he may decide to…" Severus paused, and then glanced at Lucius' trim belly.

Lucius turned a sickly shade of white which horrifically clashed with his platinum hair.

"Currently only the senior most members breed the females, least those with the inclination and desire to do so," Severus added that snide comment, reminding a smugly, superior heterosexual Lucius that up until now, Severus hadn't been a Breeder. "There's been a dramatic upswing in the number of multiple births, as though the Dark Lord has meddling in that. I fear that when the females are too old to be bred, the younger men will breed…."

Again, Severus suggestively glanced at Lucius' stomach, and then he looked at Lucius. For good measure, he bequeathed Malfoy a very appraising, extremely smoldering look, as though Severus was seriously considering what it would be like to bed Lucius. Malfoy truly deserved that bit of nastiness, as he was a heterosexual prude who thought himself superior to Half Blooded Gay Boys like Severus.

Yes, Lucius looked quite gobsmacked; in fact, Severus thought he'd looked rather _morning sick_.

"I'm sure Cissy will be willing to offer pointers," Severus suggested, not so gently twisting the knife in Lucius' kidneys. "I am concerned that the Dark Lord has allowed the two Carrows to reproduce. I often thought their close relationship was unhealthy, but can you image what their progeny will be like? Can you imagine? Brother-sister breedings? What's next? Father-son?"

Malfoy's horrified reaction was priceless, No doubt before midnight struck, he would inform every able bodied Pure Blood Male that was currently standing in as Studs what their future might entail. **_DECADES_** of Paternity clothes, morning sickness and lots of nappies.

"I'd hate to keep you away from your lover," Lucius snidely commented. "I'm sure it's been years … possibly decades…for you. Feel free to tell me tomorrow all about you riding the old man tonight."

Severus ignored Lucius, and escorted him the door. He softly closed the door behind Lucius, and he placed his head on the door.  
**  
**_**Damn you, Minerva. When you believed the Head Master died, why did you assume that I was responsible for betraying him? I returned to Hogwarts, and you had barred me from its hallowed grounds. I couldn't find you! You abandoned me to the wolves! Perhaps sending the Weasleys to you will cause you to finally believe that I did not betray the Head Master.**_

Time later for self-pity, now it was time to go to bed. Fortunately, he had a very large bed, as he liked to sprawl out when he slept, plus he had a tendency for nightmares. Hopefully there'd be enough room for him and Al in his bed. Nothing would happen between the two of them, as it would akin to having sex with a three year old Draco.

_**To think there was a time that I would have willingly taken you to my bed, Head Master. I knew that you alone among the staff at Hogwarts shared my sexual proclivities. You easily accepted that I recognized your sexual bent, yet you kept everything chaste and respectable between us. I was your weapon, Head Master. Yet, how I loved to watch your hands. They were so agile, Head Master, so gentle when you tended to my wounds that I had earned in your service.**_

He walked into his bed chambers and found Al sitting on the floor next to Nessie's bed. The House Elf was sitting in Al's lap, her good ear resting against his chest, and she was enthusiastically reading a story to him. His blue eyes were bright with interest, and he seemed to be concentrating on her expressive voice.

"The story is called, _Nigel's Mum is Having a Baby_," Nessie explained before she began to read the story. "Nigel was a little boy. He lived with his mum and his dad."

Severus quietly sat down in a chaise lounge and watched the free carnie show. Nessie continued to read the story to Al, and it appeared to be a well loved tale, for she seemed quite familiar with it. At the very end of the story, Nigel finally met his new baby brother, and all was well with Nigel's world.

"Nigel's mum is having a baby," Nessie explained. "Just like Al is. Nessie will love the baby for its Master's and Al's baby."

The House Elf then proceeded to sound a happy purr. She snuggled close to an unresisting Al, and she continued to happily jabber away. "Nessie will soon hear baby's heartbeat. Nessie will listen every day to the heartbeat for Master wants a healthy baby." _  
__**  
Actually, I don't remember ever remember expressing a desire for a baby, Nessie.**_

Al became agitated, and Nessie decided that his restlessness was because Al needed to go to bed.

"Al goes to bed now," she cheerily announced. "Al is sharing Master's nice bed. It is big and warm and soft. Nessie sleeps in the corner of the room if you be needing anything!"

Severus decided that he needed to help Al into bed, even though Nessie assured him that she had everything under control. He was surprised when he sat down next to Al on the edge of the bed for a bewildered looking Al put his hands on his belly.

"Are you in pain, Al?" Severus questioned.

Horrified blue eyes with a spark of dawning awareness in their blue depths, were staring at him.

"What… have… you… _**done… to…me**_?" Dumbledore questioned.

"Head Master?" Severus repeated. "I've done _**nothing**_."

But Al failed to respond, as the spark of intelligence had been extinguished, as completely as it had never existed.


	3. Chapter 3

_**Synopsis:**_ Our two new fathers-to-be are less then chuffed regarding the Happy News.

A/N - thanks to EP &D for being the only ones brave enough to admit that they've actually read this. Grin!

A//N #2 - diagonalta actually realized who I am. I guess I need to go in the FFdotNET relocation program!

* * *

Minerva hated funerals. The past few years of her life had been chock full of them, and when she grieved for one, she mourned for all of her dead. 

Cedric Diggory.

A boy taken in his prime.

Charity Burbage. Her fellow instigator in the Staff Meetings.

James and Lily Potter. So young and full of potential.

Ted Tonks. A big boned blonde, he had swept an icy Andromeda Black off her feet with a merry laugh.

Amelia and Edgar Bones. Bengy Fenwick. Gideon and Fabian Prewett, Mad Eye Moody.

Merlin, the damning tears were about to flow. She needed to distract herself from her maudlin thoughts and quickly! There was only one among her dead that could quickly change her mawkish mood.

_**Albus Dumbledore.**_

Yes, her overwhelming grief was now turning into righteous anger.

Merlin damn the man for dying, and leaving her in charge! Wherever the hell he had ended up, be it in Hell, Purgatory, Heaven or even the London Public Library's Lost Book Section for all eternity, she hoped that Albus was wearing itchy, black, wool robes sans pants. If there was a Goddess, Albus would have a rather itchy rash also that he'd be unable to reach to scratch.

Minerva unsuccessfully strove to banish the hateful memories of a smirking Lucius Malfoy, under a Parley Flag no less, dutifully presenting the witch with Albus' bloodstained hat and a single charred feather from Fawkes.

"The Dark Lord offers his condolences on the lost of Albus. He was a formidable opponent."

Yes, all Minerva had left of him was that damn ugly, daft hat that Albus had worn everywhere, complete with the damnable daft tassel that made him look like a loony old codger.

Albus had picked it up somewhere long before he met her. Whenever the hat had given up the ghost after far too many decades of use and abuse, Albus had gone to a haberdashery shop and cheerfully had it resurrected. Minerva absolutely, positively loathed the hat, as it reminded her of nothing more than a wearable pincushion.

In fact, when as a student she had first successfully Transfigured her Hedgehog into a pincushion in Albus' Transfiguration Class, the pincushion had looked remarkably similar to his hat, complete with the beaded, frilly froo froo detailing Albus adored. His blue eyes had been amused as Albus praised her effort, but it was only after Flitwick had given her ten points for sheer cheek after hearing about her frilly, overly decorated pincushion, had Minerva realized why the pincushion had looked so familiar. At least she didn't put the tassel on it!

Minerva had cautiously cleaned the hat by hand, carefully fixed the rips with tiny, neat stitches, and she had placed it in a place of honor in his… no… her office, right next to the Sorting Hat who had assured her that it would keep an eye on the hat, keep it under its brim so to speak, just in case one day it…_spontaneously_…. began to talk. Another talking hat was fine, just as long as it didn't sing. Singing was its specialty, its claim to fame; the Sorting Hat had reminded her.

The Sorting Hat had stared at her with its leather eyes when it had announced that last bit, and she had looked away. How had that damnable Sorting Hat known that she had been tempted to research the spell that had created it?

Albus' portrait had arrived on the office wall during the midst of a War Council in Albus' Office. In fact, that was how they had been informed about the Ambush. His portrait had woken early; far earlier than the norm for the other deceased Head Masters, and all the painted Albus had done from the moment of his awakening was scream, a long, agonizing wail of grief and pain, as though he was being Cruciated. Sometimes, he'd stop to take a breath, but the screaming would commence within a short time frame.

Dilys Derwent and a few of the other occupants of the portraits had marched into Albus' portrait and had restrained him. Dilys had poured several painted vials down Albus' throat, and the screaming had thankfully ceased. Instead, Albus had uncontrollably sobbed, his tears intermingled with his plaintive pleas for a merciful death, and he had been bustled off by Dilys to a calmer painting where he could 'rest'. The painted Fawkes had followed his Master, but sometimes, when Minerva was at her lowest point, he'd pop into his portrait and sing for her.

"It sometimes happens like that," Phineas Black had explained after Dilys and several other Head Masters and Mistresses of Hogwarts had frog marched Albus away. Naturally, he hadn't helped with Albus, but instead he had merely watched from his comfortable portrait. "When the portraits wake, sometimes their manner of death is fresh in their minds. It's taken him hard, whatever happened to him, and I do not expect him back for a long time, Minerva."

"Thank you, Phineas, for your optimism," she had snapped, feeling foolish for arguing with a snide Slytherin portrait.

"I'm not rejoicing in what happened to Albus, Minerva. I was just warning you that if you were hoping for advice from him, it will not be forthcoming in the near future," Phineas had retorted. "Sometimes I wonder why I bother chatting with you Gryffindors, you always suspect the worst of my House."

She had decided then not to bespell Albus' hat, as she simply couldn't handle a screaming hat. Dilys had given her a daily report on Albus, which had gradually diminished in frequency to weekly, then biweekly and then monthly. It was always the same report. **_Albus continues to scream._** **_I fear the manner of his death has caused his portrait to go mad. _**

So Minerva had restored the hat as it was all she could do for the man that had once been her mentor, and she always faithfully dusted it every morning, right after she brushed off the Sorting Hat. His long term service to Hogwarts had earned him seniority after all.

The Restored Phoeniux Feather was perched jauntily on Albus' hat's brim as it was something Albus would have done.

The first few months after Albus had…, died…, she had refused to give up her quarters, hoping that one day, Albus Dumbledore would show up, sans hat, none the worst for wear, with a long nonsensical story about where he had been. Yes, she knew Albus' portrait had appeared on her wall, but damn it, the portrait was still screaming almost a year after it had awaken! That wasn't normal behavior for a portrait, perhaps it was a ruse by The Bastard Whose Bollocks She Desired to Cut Off and Hang from her Nimbus 2000 and that Albus still lived!

But Minerva quickly realized the frivolity of having two living quarters in a castle full of refugees. Her former quarters were now comfortable accommodations for Sirius, Remus, Dora and little Teddy.

Damn Albus, damn him, damn him!

And now… Arthur and Molly Weasley… the latest in Minerva's List of the Dead.

Fred Weasley hit a particular shrill note of grief just then, and she flinched at the raw, agonizing heartache that the boy was expressing. Remus Lupin, who was sitting next to Minerva, squeezed her hand in a comforting gesture. Poppy Pomfrey and Filius Flitwick were staring dry eyed at the casket, each intently focused on their own mental ghosts, and Minerva wiped a tear from her eyes with her free hand.

It had been quickly decided by the four main conspirators that Pomona Sprout and Sirius Black were both horrible actors, and they had their memories Oblivated right after they had helped make the Weasleys presentable for their viewings. The two had barely managed twin looks of wounded surprise before dear, sweet, continually underestimated and brazen enough to use that complacency to his advantage, Filius, fastest swisher and flicker in all of Europe, had Oblivated their memories.

The interminable funeral service finally ended, and they followed the casket as it was carried to its final resting spot in the rapidly filling to capacity Hogwarts Graveyard. Bill Weasley as defacto Head of the Weasley Clan had unilaterally decided that his parents should be buried together in one casket. Each Weasley son helped carry their parents to their final resting spot and they were assisted by the various lost souls that the Senior Weasleys had unofficially adopted into their brood, Lee Jordan, Harry Potter and a rather somber Sirius Black. Following the casket was Ginny, Fleur and Hermoine Granger. Nymphadora Tonks-Lupin was trailing closely behind, her hair a suitably subdued mousy brown.

"In sure and certain hope of the resurrection to eternal life through our Lord Jesus Christ, we commend to Almighty God our brother Arthur Weasley and our sister Molly Weasley, and we commit their bodies to the ground; earth to earth; ashes to ashes, dust to dust. The Lord bless them and keep them, the Lord make his face to shine upon them and be gracious unto them and give them peace." Minerva's voice was composed as she read from the Book of Common Prayer.

She had found the book in Albus' office after she moved in, and Minerva had kept the book. When Minerva was a wee bairn, she had been a devout believer in the One True God. Her mother had often quoted the Bible to her, her favorite verse being, 'To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under the sun….', and as Minerva knew all too well, there was a time for war.

Yes, her mother had also thought that the Good Lord only gave people as much as they could handle, but these days, Minerva firmly believed that He thought Minerva McGonagall entirely too capable an individual. Left unsaid to anyone was that Minerva McGonagall was planning on having a very long conversation with the Man in Charge when they finally met.

But those dark thoughts were for another time, and she hoped that the Weasleys were obtaining some comfort from her words. She looked at the grieving Weasley family, knowing and accepting the undeniable fact that she was the reason they were inconsolable, and then Minerva whispered, "Amen."

_After all this Severus, if you aren't on our side, I'll kill you myself. So help me, God._

Bill Weasley picked up the shovel, and gently placed the first bit of dirt on his parents' grave. With a nod of his head, he gave the shovel to Charlie. Each Weasley child stood in a neat line, awaiting the shovel to be passed to them.

"We're running out of time, Min." Filius whispered. "I need to switch the bodies now. Arthur Weasley waking up in the middle of this would cause quite the ruckus."

"Do it, Filius," she tersely ordered. She wouldn't insult his considerable skill by warning him to be careful, but he heard her concern.

If she hadn't been watching closely, she never would have guessed that the Weasleys were Translocated out of the casket, and placed into the Room of Requirement. As it was, Filius did the Translocation spell so smoothly that only the quick nod of his head confirmed that he was successful.

Far too practiced at offering condolences for her own comfort, Minerva talked to each of the Weasleys and their various fiancées and fiancé, offering shallow words of consolation combined with sincerely fond remembrances of Arthur and Molly. Then she and the rest of the conspirators returned quickly to the Room of Requirement. The Weasleys were having their Wake in the Great Hall, and the four conspirators would be taking turns sitting up with the not so dead in the Room of Requirement. Upon being informed of the need and the reason behind it, the Room had transformed itself into a little suite of rooms full of comfortable furniture.

* * *

He couldn't breath, couldn't see… but he could hear the sounds of dirt being thrown on his coffin. In his claustrophobia induced panic of being buried alive, he began thrashing and moaning that he was alive, and begging them not to bury him. In a burst of frenzied energy, he hit someone, and he began screaming. 

He didn't recognize his own voice as whatever sound he was making as the noise didn't sound anywhere close to human, and no where near sane to his ears.

"ARTHUR!" a familiar male voice stated his name loudly. Then in a softer, calming tone, "Calm down, Arthur. You're safe, Arthur. I'm Remus Lupin, and you have greatly honored me by calling me your friend."

Arthur was shivering uncontrollably from fear and cold, and he remembered… Molly… his Molly… Mollywobbles Dead.

"Mollll?" Arthur groaned, his lips refusing to cooperate.

"Molly is here. She's asleep in the bed next to yours, Arthur. You need to relax. Stop fighting, and drink," the voice commanded. "It's to be expected that you're a little confused. Your memory will come back shortly, and you'll remember us."

"We need to sit him up," a female voice insisted. "Remus? Minerva?"

"Don't hit me again, Arthur," the male voice requested in a rather amused tone. "I love you like a brother, but another punch like that could end our friendship. You're among friends, Arthur. Now let's sit you up, and you can have a sip."

"You're real?" Arthur whispered. He opened his eyes, stared at the blurry figure, unable to figure out who the man was. Remus Lupin? Did that name sound familiar? "My eyes?"

"Yes," the voice assured him. "You're home. You and Molly are safe. Now drink. Your eyesight should be fine momentarily. Your eyes just can't clearly focus yet. Best thing to do is just close your eyes for now. Now sip this, Arthur. I have no idea how it tastes, but knowing Severus, it's probably a rather bitter potion to swallow."

Whatever the potion was, it tasted like honey and burned like fire. Arthur couldn't help but flop about like a fish out of water, and when his body finally decided to stop misbehaving; Arthur was unable to do anything as strenuous as move his fingers. It was a good thing that the Remus fellow was holding him up; else he would have smacked the back of his head hard when he collapsed back into the bed.

"Easy now, Arthur, I'm going to lay you back down," said the male voice.

"Can't… move…" he slurred.

"Arthur…this is Minerva," this was another female voice. "This is very important. You need to concentrate and tell us exactly what took place. What happened to you and Molly? What did Severus do to you?"

"Molly… pregnant…," his tongue was heavy… and he still couldn't focus his eyes.

"What?" gasped another male voice that was quickly shushed.

"Molly….and I were… captured… Molly… Died…. Sev…. Offered to Kill me… so we'd …. Be… together…. Molly?" He managed to reach out with his hand and someone… Minerva…grabbed his hand. She squeezed his hand hard, nearly breaking his fingers, but he didn't care, because he was gripping her hand just as tightly. He tried to focus his eyes, so he could see who this Minerva was… but she deliberately closed his eyelids with her fingers.

_**Remus? Minerva. I think I know them… but everything's so fuzzy.**_

"She's sleeping," Minerva explained, with an exasperated tone in her voice that reminded him of an old spinster school teacher irked that her student hadn't paid attention the first time she had made her explanation. "Don't open your eyes, as you'll get a wicked case of eye strain. Now, please tell me what happened?"

"Bred us…." Arthur's anger flared, giving him enough energy to talk. "Like a stud dog and a bitch. Damnable Pure Blooded Madness. Not enough Pure Blooded Babies… wanted more… Didn't… want… to….gave… me something…I didn't want to…Merlin's bullocks, I didn't want to do it. Couldn't… stop myself… I wanted to stop…"

"Did Severus give you it?" The other female questioned.

Severus? Has he been the arrogant blond?

Or was he the tall, dark haired man with sallow skin? The dark haired man had given Molly his robe to cover herself… he hadn't seemed like the others, relishing in their discomfort. No, the dark haired man had seemed… trapped… as though he had no other options available, yet he had given them what small kindness he dared, after all he had fed, clothed and _**killed**_ them.

Yes, it was all coming back.

Malfoy…. Lucius Malfoy….Severus… Severus Snape…

"_Yes, Severus. Kill me, kill me now. Like you killed Albus," Arthur pleaded. "But make it quick. Oh Molly, my sweet, sweet Molly."  
_

"_I didn't kill the Head Master, Arthur," Severus whispered. He pulled a small vial out of his pocket, and he gave it to Arthur. "Drink this before the others come back. You'll be with your Molly soon enough."_

The full magnitude of what he had done to Molly hit him like a dozen Bludgers in his gut. He had shielded her as best as he had been able, intent on keeping her safe from prying eyes… but Merlin's bloody scrote, how could he ever face her again? Arthur broke into sobs, truly ashamed of what he had done to his wife and the mother of his seven… no… now… eight children… and the woman Minerva gently stroked Arthur's hand. But he was inconsolable. It mattered not at all that it had been potion induced, it mattered not at all!

"No… Malfoy…oh my God… Malfoy….oh Merlin, what have I done to Molly?"

When they were both young and foolish, idealistically believing that love was far more important than Galleons, Molly had wanted an even dozen of ginger headed boys. They had planned on naming their seventh son Gideon after her deceased older brother, but Ginny had been born breech and a girl to boot. After Molly's difficult labor with Ginny, Arthur had insisted that there would be no more children, as he refused to risk Molly enduring that agony again. Now, with their oldest son in his late twenties, and Ginny engaged, there was to be another child.

_Oh Molly…. My dear, dear Molly._

"Poppy?" Remus softly questioned.

"I can't give him anything, because I have no idea what Severus originally dosed him with, nor do I know exactly what potion Severus instructed me to give him. Molly can have a Calming Draught when she wakes, Arthur can not have anything per Severus' instructions. I can only offer him…," Poppy glanced at the instruction note and grimaced…"I can offer him a medicinal draught of whiskey. Four fingers worth once every four hours, and that's it. I'll also need someone to observe him for the next twelve hours."

"I'll take first shift," Minerva promised. "Can we put him in a more comfortable bed at least?"

There was a discussion about that, including a rather heated comment about thread count, and he felt someone touch his hand.

"Arthur, it's Remus. I need to sit you up, and then I'll let you have some whiskey. It will help your nerves."

He felt the bed transfigure beneath him, the mattress widening and becoming softer, and more forgiving. The bedsheets became softer, and he felt his stiff, dress robes change into warm, comfortable night clothes. There was a strong arm helping him into an upright position, and he felt the glass against his lips.

"Sip it, Arthur. You're still rather weak." Remus ordered.

"Bill?" Arthur whispered. "Need to speak with Bill. Must be so worried… How long has it been?"

"When you're stronger, Arthur, we'll give you all the answers to your questions. You'll scare your children if they see you like this. Just a sip, Arthur," Remus insisted.

He barely drank a finger's worth of whiskey before Remus was helping him lie down. Arthur had no head for liquor, plus he was utterly emotionally gutted and physically knackered.

"Rem..us? Tell them… love…them."

"I promise I'll tell them that the minute I see them," Remus whispered. "Now go to sleep, Arthur. I'll be here when you wake."

* * *

The two Weasleys were deeply asleep, snug in their separate beds, and the four conspirators were having a brief discussion. 

"Bloody, bloody hell. I wish I knew what the hell Severus gave him," Poppy hissed. "His notes were a big ball of… wank for all the good they were!"

Three horrified mages stared at Poppy, disbelieving that they had heard her correctly.

"Poppy!" Remus, knowing the severity of the situation, tried not to laugh, but he couldn't help but chuckle. Poppy was always so prim and proper that it was amusing to see her lose her cool composure. "Your language!"

"Take a look at his notes. 'AW – unex. Adv.rxn. no sed/24. 4 Fnrs Whsky QID.' and my personal favorite. 'MW – H. Rec Sed." Poppy peered at the paper and then threw it at Minerva. "Read it, I believe that he's suggesting we sedate her for the next nine months!"

_I think Arthur might agree that it's a good idea._ Remus mentally thought, too wise to say that quip out loud. Merlin's scrote, Dora had caused his and Sirius' heads to spin when she was preggers with Teddy. He could truly empathize with Arthur on what the older man would be experiencing for the next few months. Teddy had been a joyous event planned by the troika… unlike the newest edition to the Weasley family.

"Let me look at it," Filius suggested. "I'm quite familiar with his handwriting. It's quite atrocious at the best of time, but Minerva, you do remember how he wrote on his exams? When he was trying to cram everything he knew into one single piece of parchment?"

"He'd make up creative abbreviations and his hand writing would get smaller and smaller and more and more illegible." Minerva remembered. "We'd have to hold a conference in the Staff Room to decipher his handwriting."

"Better get some tea; we're pulling an all-nighter, unless I can remember the spell that made his handwriting legible." Fillius sighed. "Minerva?"

"I think I remember it," Minerva agreed. With a practiced ease, she flicked and swished her wand, and then sternly announced, "_Planto suus manus legio_!"

The single piece of parchment glowed and then multiplied into six similar sized parchments. Severus' tight scrawl flowed into an extremely graceful and Merlin be thanked, legible cursive, and Remus growled.

"This would have been a nice spell to know when I taught here," he protested, thinking of all those hours he had spent attempting to read chicken scratch written with ink and quills. Merlin's beard, why wouldn't Albus let the students use Biros!

"If you actually made tenure, I would have taught it to you," Filius retorted.

"Shhh! I'm trying to read," Poppy chastised. "Shouldn't you two be going to the Weasleys' Wake?"

Filius and Remus knowing a dismissal when they heard one, quickly left, but not before reminding Minerva that she needed to make her required appearance at the Wake.

Like she could ever forget, Minerva sadly thought. She went to every funeral and every wake.

"I'll be there in a few minutes. Give Bill my apologies, and tell him that I just needed some time," Minerva explained.

* * *

"Minerva," Poppy's voice was full of concern, and Minerva raised her hand to stop Poppy's tongue-lashing in mid-breath. 

She knew what that tone meant, that Poppy would warn Minerva that she was stretching herself too thin, that even Albus Dumbledore had a trusted assistant and that Minerva needed to start delegating. Then Poppy would start pushing tonics and potions down her throat to keep her healthy and full of energy.

"Don't," Minerva warned her. "I appreciate your concern about my health, but I don't have time or energy for an argument with you. Tell me what's happening with the Weasleys."

"Molly is with child," Poppy admitted. "According to Severus' notes, the Death Eaters just realized that there aren't enough Pure Bloods left to ensure their Glorious Revolution will succeed. So they're starting a breeding program to create more little Pure Bloods. When they captured Arthur and Molly, they realized that they had two fertile Pure Bloods in their grasp, and decided to use them. I believe that they planned on taking the child from them once it was born, and indoctrinating it in the Pure Blood mentality."

"What absolute bilge!" Minerva snapped.

"Severus gave Molly something that made it appear that she was dead. Then he… killed… Arthur… but apparently Arthur had an unanticipated reaction to whatever Severus gave him, and Severus believed that he had well and truly killed Arthur. Molly can be dosed as needed to get her through his, but Arthur will be the problem. Severus gave me a list of what possible ingredients may have caused the adverse reaction, but they're most of the common compounds used for either calming or tranquilizing potions."

Poppy sighed, and then she began speaking very softly.

"I'm not a Potions Master, Minerva. I don't want to start finagling ingredients, but we'll need to do something for Arthur. A Mind Healer might be required to help Arthur work out his concerns, and unfortunately, we don't have one here. Judging from Arthur's reaction, Molly may need assistance in dealing with this also. I'm quite worried about what exactly happened to them, and that we might not be able to handle it here. Minerva, perhaps you didn't notice that Arthur seemed rather disturbed…"

"What gave you that idea?" Minerva tartly retorted, as she couldn't believe that Poppy thought Minerva was so thick that she didn't comprehend that Arthur Weasley was in the midst of a personal crisis. "The fact that he was in tears? That he believes he forced himself on his wife?"

Her snark earned her a disapproving glare from the mediwitch. In return, Minerva leaned back in her chair and glared at Poppy.

"Don't look at me like that," Poppy snapped, refusing to be intimidated by McGonagall. "I still remember why Professor Dumbledore gave the two of us three months' detention in our sixth year."

"It was your utterly brilliant idea," Minerva retorted. "I just cast the spell."

"To this day I don't know how he realized you were the one that did it! If the students only knew what their head mistress did to a member of this school's facility, you'd have to hide away in shame!" The mediwitch admitted, before she giggled.

"Albus admitted to me a few years ago that he still couldn't prove that we had done it, but he had a very strong suspicion that the reason why his wardrobe abruptly consisted of only of monochromes was due to the two of us," Minerva confessed. "Merlin's pants, do you remember when Fawkes first agreed to bond with his as his familiar? Albus wore scarlet and gold to coordinate with him."

"For weeks!" Poppy admitted. "Albus even had that matching hat that he wore. He was so proud of that damn hat. His hair was still auburn then…"

Poppy shook her head, unwilling to give voice to the sheer awfulness of that particular color combination.

"And scarlet pants," Minerva admitted. "SCARLET and GOLD PANTS, Poppy.I never told you what colors I made them, did I?"

"No," the mediwitch leaned over the table, and motioned for Minerva to come closer. "We both swore never to speak of it, as that way Albus would never know for certain that we were responsible! But come on, confession is good for the soul, Min. What color did you turn then?"

"Emerald Green and Silver," Minerva admitted. "At the time, I figured that would be the Slytherin thing to do. Looking back, I think that's probably what tipped him off that it wasn't a Slytherin student who had decided to update his wardrobe."

A giggle escaped her lips before she could stop it.

"Perhaps I should have turned his pants black," Minerva quipped.

Poppy laughed also, and before she realized it, Minerva was laughing uncontrollably.

To her surprise, she began weeping as her tears turned into hysterical sobs, and Poppy quickly embraced her. Poppy's warm arms surrounded her and held her close, giving Minerva much needed emotional support.

"Let it out, Min. You can cry, like the rest of us." Poppy whispered. "You can't hold it all in."

"I have to," Minerva wept. "I have to hold it all together because Albus isn't here. Damn the man for trusting the Parley Flag. Damn him, damn him for leaving me this mess. Everything's gone all pear-shaped."

The woman known far and wide as the Lioness of Gryffindor, and often touted as courage and determination made flesh incarnate, wept until she had no tears left. When her spell of weeping had ceased, a spent Minerva felt… hollow and raw.

"Here," Poppy handed her a glass. "Drink it all."

Minerva gulped the liquid down, and quickly swallowed. The empty feeling in her soul was still there and aching, but it wasn't quite as raw.

"Severus' medicinal whiskey?" Minerva shakily quipped.

"He is an expert on brewing, and in this case, his advice was medically sound." Poppy admitted.

"Am I doing the right thing now, Poppy?" Her voice was uncertain when she voiced that question. "Letting everyone believe that Arthur and Molly are dead? Their children are _**gutted**_, Poppy. Do you think it's easy for me to decide that Severus' safety is more important than the Weasley children knowing the truth? What am I to tell Arthur and Molly? I'm truly sorry, but I've decided its in our best interest to turn you two into martyrs? We can't leave them ensorcelled in the Room of Requirement for the next decade!"

"You're protecting Severus from the He Who Most Not Be Named's wrath. The fact that he got the Weasleys out of that predicament certainly seems to prove that he is still loyal to Albus and the cause. We need someone on the inside, and we can't risk losing him. Yet, you originally believed that Severus betrayed Albus." Poppy's voice was free was censure, as she was helping Minerva unsnarl her knotty and convoluted thoughts.

"He told me when he delivered the Weasleys that he didn't betray Albus. Originally, I did trust Severus…" Minerva softly protested. "But he wasn't here when Albus died. He was off on a mission for He Who Must Not be Named. I waited for him, as long as I could, but I couldn't risk losing the entire school for one man, Poppy."

"Albus knew Severus far better than you ever did, and he trusted him. Now Albus is deceased, and you aren't completely sure about Severus because you don't know Severus as well as Albus did. The question is, do you still trust Albus?" Poppy calmly asked.

Minerva paused, and stared at the wall in order to deliberate on that question. Did she still believe in Albus?

"Let go of your anger towards Albus dying, Min, and ask yourself, do you still trust Albus? We all believed that He Who Must Not Be Named had Harry as his prisoner. Albus was savvy enough to know that bloody, bloody bastard would break the Parley Accords, but he willingly made the decision to sacrifice himself. Min, Albus never would have met with He Who Must Be Not be Named if he didn't believe that you were completely capable of leading us," Poppy's voice was soft and then she reached for Minerva's hand, squeezing it hard.

"Minerva, you need faith in yourself, and most importantly, you need faith in us. Get away from the school for a few hours."

The thought was so tempting, and yet so damn risky. The Resistance had lost one leader, and yet now she was seriously considering her need for a holiday.

"Tell Filius that you need a break, and let him whip you up some protection spells. Take an hour or two. Go _**shopping**_. Buy some of those tacky romance books that you used to smuggle into Hogwarts. You know the ones, the Muggle ones where the Muggle falls in love with a dark and handsome wizard with a mysterious past. We'll get together one night, grab some drinks and crisps, and we'll underline the best parts, Min!"

"You're incorrigible," Min softly declare, her voice warm with amusement. "Underlining?"

"Those books were far more informative then Albus and Nurse Maggie's sex talk could ever have hoped to have been. I still can't believe you ask Albus Dumbledore the correct flick and swish for a contraceptive spell!"

"He asked if anyone had any questions, and I didn't want to swish and flick incorrectly on that particular spell. I couldn't ask Filius!" Minerva's voice rose in protest, and she flinched when she remembered the Weasleys were in the room.

"Don't worry; they'll sleep until tomorrow morning. But considering that I've had to do the Sex Talk with Albus, Severus and Filius at one time or another, I can assure you that Filius is far more…. explicit… and informative than the other two lads. Our Filius is a very naughty, naughty boy, but we never had any pregnant witches when he gave the talks. I think he scared them into celibacy what with his magic illusion of what childbirth actually entails." Poppy giggled as she admitted that. "Severus just scared all the girls into not asking any questions."

"Filius does have nice hands," Minerva softly asserted, and then tsk'd tsk'd at Poppy's faux horrified look. "Don't look at me like that; he helps me with my headaches, as someone's worried that I'm turning into a junkie. Since I can't get any drugs, Filius massages my temples, neck and shoulders."

The two witches sat in companionable silence for a bit, and then Minerva sighed. Her conscience was nagging her and reminding her that she had to make a command appearance.

"I need to make an appearance at the wake," she admitted.

"Don't go just yet," Poppy ordered. "You're looking a little peaked, and we need our Fearless Leader to appear in perfect health, completely confident in her ability to Lead Us. Let me give you a small sip of a headache potion, and I'll see about your bloodshot eyes."

"Thank you, Poppy," Minerva whispered, trying to convey her thanks, not just for the headache potion, but just for being solid, dependable and yes, slightly risqué Poppy.

"After you attend the wake, you're to go straight to bed. I'll talk to Filius about arranging a brief holiday for you tomorrow. He'll understand but I suggest you don't let Remus or anyone else know, unless you want Sirius Black following you."

* * *

The Head Master… Al… was asleep in his bed, blissfully hogging most of the bed, as he insisted on sprawling. 

Could Al actually insist on sprawling like cat, taking over the majority of the bed? There was a body that belong to the Head Master, of which Severus was quite certain. It breathed, it ate, rather messily truth be told, it pissed, and it did its various bodily functions. But _**insisting**_… that implied a level of awareness that he didn't believe the body possessed.

Yet, he had heard Al talk.

The blue eyes had seemed alert…. He had _**SPOKEN**_! The Dark Lord had said that the Vessel had no mind… yet… Al had spoken!

_"What… have… you… __**done… to…me**__?"_

Then Al hadn't spoken the remainder of the evening. No, instead, he had stared blankly into space even while Severus tempted, teased, cajoled and even bribed Al to speak. Not even sherbet lemons has caused Al to respond.

"Nessie?" Severus called for his House Elf, and she quickly appeared, as always, dissimilar ears atremble in her anxiety to please.

"Yes, Master?" Nessie asked.

"You're to keep both of your eyes on Al. You're to keep him safe. Water him, feed him, wash him and most importantly, entertain him so he doesn't get into any of my potion supplies. He is not to leave my quarters, and no one is to take him from here, except if the Dark Lord personally insists. I am leaving for a few hours in order to get him clothes and other supplies. Are my orders easy to understand?"

Nessie whimpered that she understood perfectly, and then she stared at him soulfully. That usually meant she wanted to ask her most gracious Master a question but she was too fearful.

**_"What?"_** Severus snapped, as he had the same amount of patience for his former students as he did for Nessie, which is to say, none.

"May Nessie listens for baby?" She was once again aquiver in her excitement over the little monstrosity in Al's belly.

Savagely, Severus mentally chastised himself for calling the baby a little monstrosity. It wasn't its fault that it was the offspring of two bent wizards thanks to a copious amount of black magic. If he was to be a father… and his heart unexpectedly lurched at the thought of a dark haired, blue eyed little boy staring up at him with fear in his eyes…. Severus needed to learn to act appropriately.

When he was younger, he always vowed not to behave like his abusive parents when he had a child of his own. That feeble wish had been before he realized that the stork didn't make deliveries for bent little wizards like himself. But he had naively believed that he'd be more like the Evanses,… or Merlin Forbid, now he was far older, his ideal wizard father was a wizard far more like Arthur Weasley, as his love for his family was so vast that he was willing to die for his children. Lucius wouldn't die for Cissy or Draco, not by a long shot. If only Arthur's spawn wasn't so damn numerously ginger!

"Nessie know Mistress having baby before she did, as Nessie could hears heartbeats!" Nessie explained.

"Yes, you may do so, as it's very important that you keep your young master safe. In fact, we'll discuss your wish to bond to the child in detail when I return," Severus decided to be magnanimous. After all, it appeared the Nessie was already besotted with the baby, and the child deserved someone to unconditionally love it.

Maybe, his child with the Head Master wouldn't be a complete dunderhead. No, it couldn't be possible with parents like his, both of which were bloody brilliant. The problem wouldn't be that his child was a fumble fingered, daft dunderhead, no, the problem would be that Filius Flitwick would somehow snatch him for Ravenclaw!

It would be almost as horrifying as if Gryffindor got the wee one! That insanely courageous streak was running through his child, and Severus knew that he'd have to carefully mold the child into ignoring his inherent nobility. Nobility and bravery got you into trouble, just look at the Head Master, while Severus had lived to fight another day.

Nessie was having literal paroxysms of joy, and babbling what a kind, handsome, generous Master she had. He watched for a few minutes, confused by her overwhelming reaction

Perhaps he'd pick her up a new blanket or pillow for her nest. Or maybe, he'd pick up some new books for her to read to Al. Yes, he was being generous, but after all, today was a day for his new family to celebrate, Severus decided, and included the House Elf.

* * *

Looking back, Minerva couldn't say why she decided to pick this particular town for her two hour holiday. Yes, it was on the coastline of Scotland, but why this particular town? 

She was in the Muggle bookstore, shamelessly picking up assorted trash to read. How her cheeks would burn if anyone she knew saw her with these books, "A Wizard and his Wand", "For the Love of a Centaur", which promised plenty of trashy, physically impossible smuttiness, and her personal favorite series for its all time raunchiness, "The Triplet Wizards of Ashoken." There were four new books in that series that she hadn't read yet and the one with a green eyed, dark haired witch who dared to dally with all three of the boys seemed quite intriguing.

Minerva turned the corner, and she accidentally hit someone hard. Their books flew about the place, and she heard an all too familiar voice apologize.

Least, she thought the voice sounded familiar, as she never remembered hearing Severus Snape's dulcet tones apologize to _**anyone**_. She bent over, attempting to keep him from seeing her face. Yes, she had Glarmourized herself, but a True Seer would see her for who she really was. It was doubtful that the boy had that particular talent, as it was rare as hen's teeth, but it would be just her luck.

Merlin's tattered and torn, polka dotted knickers tied in a bow, what the hell was the boy was reading?

_**"What to Expect When You're Pregnant?" **_

"_**An Idiot's Guide to Pregnancy?" **_

"_**Tummy Talk?"**_

"_**Beethoven for Babies?" **_

"_**You Don't Need to be Like Your Father: Breaking the Cycle of Abuse?"  
**_  
The very idea of Severus reproducing made her giggle. She couldn't help it, but she had always thought the boy was as bent as they came.

His hand unexpectedly grasped on hers, and he pulled it toward him. Minerva had to look into a stranger's face that had the dark, glittering eyes of Severus Snape. The man stared at her for a moment, and then hissed, "_**Min**_? You actually read this trash?"


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer # 1 - Not my characters.  
Disclaimer # 2 - non con, mpreg, preg, Albus!Whumping! House Elf alert

* * *

"Miniya?" Severus' voice softly questioned. "Is that _**you**_? Reading trash? Miniya, _**really**_." 

"Sevelin," Minerva sweetly answered, determined not to show her unease at meeting a disguised Severus Snape in the middle of a Muggle bookstore. Yes, the boy's dark hair was cut in Muggle style, and he was clad in a leather jacket, black, naturally, a jumper, faded grey jeans and black trainers, but the black, glittering eyes were most assuredly the eyes of the man she knew to be Severus Snape. Pointedly, she looked at the books Severus was purchasing, and in a voice dripping with sugar, she quipped, "Are congratulations in order?"

Really, the opportunity to rattle Severus' chain was too good to pass by. He was no doubt internally smirking about catching her reading porn, as he had naturally picked up the damnable Triplets of Ashoken, and perused the cover with three scantily clad trio of identical wizards who appeared hung like hippogriffs with a glandular disorder.

Sevelin blanched at her comment, and she swore that his ramrod posture grew even straighter, as if it were physically possible.

"Miniya, I am to be a father," he confessed. His voice was flat, so unlike Remus Lupin's wild enthusiasm, when he had been exulting about little Teddy. Remus had picked her up off her feet and swung her around. Minerva had laughed giddily, delighting in the first bit of good news since Albus had died.

"Do I know the lucky woman?" Minerva couldn't help but snark, thinking of Arthur and Molly Weasley.

Only through knowing the boy as long as she had, did she see his reaction. Severus swallowed once, which meant that she had scored.

"I would not put it quite that way," Severus slowly admitted. "But no, I can safely say that I doubt you'd recognize, as you so quaintly described it, the lucky woman."

The two of them stared at each other, much like a stray dog stares at a cat, each judging and weighing the other, wondering who would draw first. Neither truly wanted to be the first one to cast, merely the one that ended it. Severus had youth and faster reflexes on his side, while Minerva had a wealth of experience, and the willingness to fight dirty. She knew exactly how to hurt the boy, and Severus knew it. Yet, Severus was a Death Eater, which meant that he could tie her up, complete with a bow, and present her to He That Must Not Be Named.

"It's rather silly, Miniya, to stare at each other like two duelists while we're in the middle of a bookstore. If we do anything, all the Muggles will need to be Obliviated. Therefore I swear on my wand, that you need not fear that I will attack you unless you pull your wand on me. In fact, Miniya, can I buy you a cuppa? For old times sake?"

Mad Eye Moody's voice was in her head, screaming that she was a silly bint, that she was hopelessly naïve if she thought she could trust Severus Snape.

"I also swear on my wand that you need not fear that I will attack you unless you pull your wand on me. A cuppa would be nice, as long as you don't pour, dear." Minerva graciously admitted. "I prefer to drink my tea plain. I know you'd like to sweeten my tea, dear."

"Not even a dash of cream? Let me pay for your…. Educational… materials," Severus drawled. "Is it a new course that you're considering of offering to selected students?"

"Severlin, that's so sweet of you, but you should save your funds for the baby," she deliberately cooed in a soft, caring tone. "Plus the lucky woman. I hope you're planning on pampering her."

Again, the throat swallow, which meant that she had nailed the boy to the wall and kicked him in balls.

"I must confess that I have not thought that far ahead," confessed the unhappy father to be. "Perhaps you might offer some suggestions on how to pamper a pregnant person?"

She took him by the hand, and pulled him toward the Pregnancy Section. "Let's see what we can find for you to read."

_What to Expect when Your Wife Is Expanding : A Reassuring Month-by-Month Guide for the Father-to-Be, whether He Wants Advise or Not_ was quickly handed to Severus. 

"Oh this sounds exciting, Severlin. _The Caveman's Guide to Surviving your Spouse's Pregnancy_… Wait. This is the book, _My Spouse is Expecting, and I'm Having a Breakdown_," Minerva then cheerfully dropped those books plus six others similarly named into Severus' arms. "Perhaps we should get a basket?"

The basket obtained, Minerva continued to collect assorted books, and then she noticed that Severus was busy adding books to a separate basket for her enjoyment.

"Miniya? You might enjoy this fine piece of literature; it's a first hand account of a woman who's abducted by…" Severus paused, and shook his head. "A herd of Centaurs, and she learns how to sexually pleasure them. I believe that they have diagrams. The pictures might prove quite useful in modifying the positions. I know how your hips ache if you stand for too long."

He handed her a basket, and placed the book of Centaur porn into it. "Oh, this sounds interesting, as involves seven hundred pages of sex with Mermaids. Did you know that Mermaids are symbolic of lesbianism?"

"I prefer men," Minerva snapped as Severus dropped the Mermaid book into her container. For good measure, he intentionally included an even dozen of wizardly smut books. Poppy would be thrilled with the sheer variety of smut, but then again, she wasn't face to face with Severus Snape.

"So do I," Severus dryly reminded her. "Perhaps we could double date one night."

Bloody hell, the two of them were easily falling back into their Hogwart's mode. They'd have a regular snarkfest in the Staff Room which usually ended with Filius threatened to stun them both, "'for the good of your fellow teachers, you understand".

"Is your preference the reason why you're so familiar with those particular books?" Minerva questioned.

For a moment, Severus wore his familiar dour expression. "I think NOT, Miniya. I did a tracking spell, and I've located all the porn in this store suitable for an old spinster school teacher."

"Due to your well known lack of interest in the female sex, perhaps your wife would appreciate you bringing home some of these books. Perhaps it will keep her entertained during those long, lonely nights ahead as her belly swells."

For a moment, Minerva feared that she had gone too far, as Severus' black eyes blazed. Then his blazing eyes burned out to dead embers.

"We're not married," he admitted. "

_There's also not enough of a mind left to be interested in reading, Miniya, I swear to you that I had nothing to do with it. It was done without my knowledge and certainly without my consent. It had been decided to give me the Weasley child to raise as my own, but with their deaths…"_

She stepped back, nearly tripped over a stepstool, and he grabbed her quickly to prevent her from falling arse over tea kettle.

He had spoken to her _mind_ to _mind_.

_"I need to speak to you. Do the Weasleys still live? _His mind's voice was edgy with what she believed was honest concern_. "Arthur had an unanticipated reaction to his dose. I truly believed that I had killed him."_

_"Yes. They're both alive, I spoke to Arthur, and Molly was still sleeping when I left."_

_"Don't need to scream for me to hear you, Minerva. Just think your response," _was his crisp answer. "_You're yelling like the proverbial penny pinching shrew at a fishmonger's shop_."

Minerva immediately thought something before she could even think not to do so and Severus' voice gently chastised her for her rather colorful language.

"Now, let me pay for your books, Miniya," Severus generously announced. "Then we can have a nice cuppa. Actually, one of the pubs by the pier has good takeaway. Perhaps we could walk along with the beach and snack on Fish and chips, Min?"

_"I don't trust you, Severus."_

_"I certainly don't trust you either, Minerva. But right now, it's a choice between you and the devil."_

* * *

Dilys Derwent was only a portrait, yes, but she remembered all of the true Dilys' skills and experience, plus she had learned much in the intervening years since her physical death. But it was safe to say that she had never borne witness to such an incident as a portrait, or even as a flesh and blood. 

Phineas Black glared at Dilys, and then the most Hated Hogwarts Head Master Ever in the Entire History of Hogwarts dramatically pointed at the weeping Dumbledore who was tightly curled in the fetal position in his bed. After his 'awakening', Albus had been quickly removed to a nice quiet portrait where he could 'rest'.

It was a bright, sunshiny room, with large windows, a large bed and a huge soft sofa. Conspicuously missing was anything with a sharp edge or any object that one might be able to use to harm one's self. Yes, he was a portrait, but he would still be able to abuse his portrait self if he had the means to do so.

"No, naturally, you didn't believe me when I told you that he spoke last night. He specifically asked, 'What have you done to me?'. I called for you _immediately_, and you said it was my imagination. You stated that it was nothing but my false hopes for Dumbledore, as he hadn't spoken coherently in all his time as a portrait... You _refused_ to believe that Albus might speak to me, a Slytherin. Yes, I had my doubts myself, but I heard him speak!"

Phineas was on a roll, and his voice was rising in righteous disbelief.

"Then pray tell, please explain the latest change to Albus Dumbledore's appearance," Phineas demanded.

Dilys glanced at the Weeping Albus and her gaze was fixated on the multitude of tiny plaits in his hair and beard, gaily and brightly beribboned in bright, clashing colors by someone who had absolutely no sense of decorum or taste. He was wearing a torn and soiled ash colored robe, which hadn't been what he had been wearing yesterday when he had been put to bed. Yes, portraits had a tendency of changing their clothes as who wanted to be seen in the same clothes for hundreds of years, so perhaps he had changed, but his hair? There were easily hundreds of little braids, all lovingly done just so, as though a manic babysitter had nothing better to do with her time then to compulsively braid Albus' hair.

Merlin's scrote, Dumbledore liked flashy clothes, but he had never worn ribbons in his hair.

"What is he clutching?" Dilys questioned.

"Looks like a battered stuffed animal." Phineas' tone was doubtful.

"Perhaps one of the children in the other portraits gave it to him?" Dilys uncertainly questioned.

"No one is allowed to visit Albus unless you or the Head Mistress has given permission," Black reminded her. "Those are the rules, and unlike some Head Masters, I do not bend the rules."

"Albus?" Dilys questioned, ignoring Phineas' snide comment about Albus's well known lackadaisical approach to anything resembling rules and regulations. "Can you hear me?"

Carefully, she touched Albus. Usually, he failed to notice when she touched him, but today, _today_, he stared at her, his blue eyes feral and yet completely aware of her. He flinched at her touch and he began to shake.

"_HURTS_!" He screamed, his voice rising in an unholy shriek. "_HURT AL. STOP! NOOOOOOO_!_STOP STOP MAKE IT STOP!"  
_  
"He's clutching his belly," Phineas remarked, slightly unnerved by Albus' wailing. "He's holding that stuffed thing over his belly…Is it a Stuffed House Elf?"

"Red vial!" Dilys snapped, and for a wonder Phineas ran to do her bidding. Expertly, she poured the liquid down Albus' throat, and the Head Master was soon inaudibly sobbing.

"Albus?" Dilys questioned. She raised her voice several times, and Albus failed to respond. He was back in his own private hell, and he failed to acknowledge her.

"Bloody hell, Dilys. Albus has gone completely astray in the head," Phineas firmly announced his opinion. "Perhaps I should get the Trolls from the portrait next to the Hufflepuff dorm?"

The Trolls were three big burly brothers who were called in whenever a portrait grew disruptive and needed to be 'quieted'.

"He hasn't attacked anyone, Phineas. I need to do some research. I must speak to the Head Mistress," Dilys snapped. "I'll be back. Keep an eye on him, and if he speaks again, contact me immediately!"

Dilys then disappeared from the painting, leaving a still sobbing Albus clutching a bedraggled stuffed House Elf and a disgruntled Phineas.

"Why yes, Dilys, I accept your sincere apology." Phineas called after her, knowing that she couldn't hear him, but still he felt the need to express his displeasure at Dilys' cavalier treatment. "Yes, I was quite right that something was up with Albus."

* * *

Molly Weasley was glaring daggers and a few sharp swords at a composed Filius Flitwick, and a regretful Remus Lupin. She looked toward her husband for his support, but a still traumatized Arthur was sitting in a dark corner in the Room of Requirement, with his head bowed. Deciding that Arthur's help would not be forthcoming, she redoubled her determination and repeated her request. 

"We want out of this room, so we can see our family," she firmly announced, daring the diminutive Flitwick to refuse her request and risk taking his life in his own small hands. "They must be _quite_ worried."

"You have to wait until Minerva returns, Molly," Filius explained for the ninth time. "She is not on campus."

"So she's out gallivanting? Does she realize that there's a war going on?" Molly growled.

"Minerva is quite aware of the fact that there is a war occurring," the even tempered Filius Flitwick explained. "But she was quite stressed…"

"Quite stressed, STRESSED?" Molly roared. "Try being held captive by Death Eaters for two months, with your family believing that you're dead. You BURIED us, Filius! BURIED US! There's a big GRAVE MARKER over a FRESHLY DUGGED GRAVE with OUR NAMES ON IT! Remus! I can't believe you agreed to this insanity!"

Her anger flared, and she moved toward Filius Flitwick. Molly was quite prepared to thump one of the most powerful wizards currently in Europe, as though he was merely one of her errant sons, along with thumping Remus Lupin, but Arthur unexpectedly stepped between the three of them.

"Molly, you need to settle down. Being irate is not good for… " Arthur paused.

"The baby, yes, I know," Molly admitted. "But I don't trust Severus, Remus. I can't understand why you're so bloody keen about protecting him. He killed Albus!"

"He claims that he didn't," Arthur inserted. The trauma of the last few months was still deeply affecting him, as he spoke more diffidently than his norm. "Severus saved our lives, Molly. There is a Life Debt owed to him, and more than just one Life Debt. I count our debts to him as six."

"Six?" Molly questioned.

"You, me, the child. Ron and our children's betrothed, Hermoine and Harry," Arthur quietly stated.

"Ron? Harry? Hermoine?" Molly protested.

"He went toe to toe with Remus when Remus failed to take his potion all those years ago. Remus, you know that I've long since forgiven you for that night. The trio might not recognize it as worthy of a Life Debt, but I do. I owe Severus six lives, and I will give him the benefit of the doubt."

That said, Arthur returned back to his corner.

"Filius, he'll go mad in here," Molly softly pleaded. "Remus, what would you do if you were separated from Teddy? If he thought you were dead? Would you sit here quietly?"

The werewolf shook his head sadly, and he easily admitted that he'd be far more upset that Molly was.

"If there was any other way, I would do it. Believe me," Filius assured her. "Now go lie down. When Minerva gets back, I know she'll want to talk to you. I'm sure we can think of something that will make this easier for you."

The Charms Instructor left the room, and Molly looked at Remus. The werewolf opened his arms, and he embraced her. They hugged for a bit, Molly accepting his comfort and then they separated.

"Good thing that Dora wasn't here, seeing you hugging another woman," Molly sniffled.

"How is he?" Remus softly questioned, as he looked at Arthur.

"Not well," Molly admitted. "He's withdrawing into himself. Toward the end of our captivity, he didn't talk unless I spoke to him. That's not quite the truth, he spoke to Severus… actually Arthur _demanded_… that I was to be suitably fed and given proper clothes. He was so brave, as I didn't want to accept anything from Severus. Arthur held it all together then, to make sure that they took care of me."

"You seem to be holding up well," the werewolf assured her. "I don't think you were quite as scrikey as much as you seemed to believe that you were."

"I have to hold everything together," she tersely stated. "I have Arthur… and the baby… to worry about. It would none of them any good if I ran around shrieking blue murder like a woman gone mad. Perhaps, you could bring some Muggle artifacts with you, next time you visit? Something to take his mind off… everything? Something to distract him. Perhaps…with a battery or a plug? Or possibly an enjin?"

Her tongue tripped over the strange word and Molly flushed.

"Perhaps something with moving parts, so he can take it apart and figure out how it works? Something not too complex, so he could successfully put it together again? Yet, not so easy that a child of three could reassemble it? He's usually quite good with that stuff, but he's distracted these days."

"I'll do that," Remus promised. "I'll be back shortly, and I'll bring something for you to read. Perhaps Good Witchkeeping? But for now, go lie down, Molly, you look exhausted."

Molly nodded her head, and she headed toward her husband. He was lying in his bed, and she gently cast a combining spell, so their two single beds merged into an extremely large, comfortable bed.

"Remus is leaving, you should say goodbye, Arthur. He's promised to bring us a spot of tea next time he visits. Won't that be nice?" She cheerily questioned.

Arthur said nothing, and she loudly said goodbye to Remus. After the werewolf left, Molly sat down on the bed next to her husband. Hesitantly, she began slowly stroking his tense back, a familiar gesture of long standing between the two of them. The gesture was a gentle way of Molly letting Arthur that she wanted to be intimate. If Arthur was interested, he'd peer at her over his glasses and quirk his left eyebrow which meant he was thinking lecherous thoughts about his favorite red head. Arthur didn't squirm away from her touch, but Arthur also didn't give that all too familiar saucy grin that meant he wanted to make love also.

"I'll give Minerva McGonagall the rough side of my tongue when Queen Minerva decides to show her face. What was she thinking? To declare us DEAD! Then she goes out gallivanting on a seaside holiday. Arthur? Don't you want to see our children again? You didn't say anything when Filius told us what they had decided," Molly questioned. She began to laugh softly. "Well, it is nice to have some peace and quiet, Arthur. I can't blame you for wanting some quiet time before the horde descends on us."

"This quiet won't last for long. Can you imagine the looks of absolute horror on our children's faces when we tell them that we're having a baby? Mum! Dad! The two of you! At your age! Making love!" Molly teased. "Ron will be horrified, and hopefully Fleur isn't already pregnant. She looks the type to want her first baby to be the focus of everyone's attention. Poor Ginny, she wanted to marry Harry in a few months, and I'll be out to here with our baby."

She continued stroking Arthur's back, and when he failed to respond, she moved closer to him. They hadn't been intimate since the night they had created the latest Weasley, and Arthur's growing emotional and physical distance was beginning to scar her heart. Was he secretly ashamed? To have gotten such an old biddy with child? They'd be laughing stocks, no doubt, but they always had been the butt of others' jokes, what with being red heads with far too many children and a few too little Galleons.

When Arthur was sleeping, he still pulled her body close to his. He was never particularly heavy to begin with, but he had gotten leaner through their captivity, as Arthur had insisted that she eat the most of his portion of the meals. Little gestures, but for a fearful woman looking for any reassurance, they meant far more than all the Galleons in Gringotts Wizarding Bank. Arthur still cared, still loved her enough to stand face to face to Severus Snape and demand proper care for his wife. Those bastards had hurt him, wounded him so deeply that she had almost feared that she had lost the man she loved.

Molly Prewett Weasley had lost her brothers Gideon and Fabian to the Death Eaters, like hell would she let them get her Arthur.

She moved her hands toward his front, gently rubbing whatever bits of his that she could reach. His knees, his upper thighs, his large, gentle hands were what she caressed, all the while keeping her hands from being too intimate. Arthur needed to be gently touched and stroked, reassured and comforted, not groped and fondled.

His long fingers gripped hers, and Arthur pulled her towards him.

"Sorry, love, I just can't," he whispered. "It's completely my problem, Mollywobbles. Not you, love."

Carefully, she positioned herself next to his back, so that they were lying together like two spoons. It was the closest they had been physically since what had occurred, and she could feel her heart pounding in her chest.

"Cuddling's nice, love," she whispered. "I'd like to feel your arms around me, Arthur."

"Would you mind holding me?" Arthur questioned. "I'd like that."

She did so, and outwardly, she was cool serenity, but inwardly, she was weeping. Arthur hadn't wanted to hold her because that meant he'd have to look at her as they were facing each other. With her arms around him, he could stare at the wall, but still his hands were firmly entwined with hers.

Boldly, she kissed him on his cheek, and Molly was rewarded for her audacity when Arthur put her hands to his lips and he kissed each of her fingers.

"It'll be alright," Molly promised.

* * *

"Chippie sauce? Or salt and vinegar?" Severus questioned. 

"I'm an Edinburgher," Minerva reminded him tartly. "Chippie sauce, Sevelin!"

After he paid for their meals, the two of them walked out to the beach, each carrying a neatly wrapped bundle. He juggled his large shopping bag of books and his fish and chips for a moment, as he pointed out a spot to eat that was overlooking the sea.

"Tastes better with newspaper," was what she said in agreement.

"Traditionalist," he retorted. "Some of us prefer not having to deal with ink, Miniya."

_Let's walk out on the beach, Minerva. That way I can see if anyone's followed me. They're not talented enough to do invisibility and cover their foot prints at the same time._

_What the hell is going on, Severus? What the hell are you doing in Stonehaven?"_

He inhaled deeply, enjoying the smell of the sea.

"Tuck in, Min, cold Chippie sauce must taste worse than warm Chippie Sauce."

_I needed to get away for a bit. Hard as it might seem to believe, I do get tired of dealing with mass murdering psychopaths and a breeding farm of hormonal women._

_I've heard about the breeding farm._

_Be prepared to choke, Minerva. Alecto and Amycus have reproduced. That child is doomed to a life time of having a brain the size of a pea. I doubt it will be able to manage the higher functions of talking and walking at the same time._

_I don't know why I'm walking on a beach in Scotland with someone I don't trust._

_Because I bought you fish and chips. Traditionally, that means you have to put out, but since I'm not inclined to enjoy your considerable physical charms, you have to listen to me instead, Min. Rather sadistic of me, isn't it? But then again, I always prided myself on my civilized Slytherin cruelty. Griffindors usually just focus on being physically cruel._

_Bastard._

_No, my parents were married, much to my eternal regret._

_Why should I trust you?_

_Because I was and STILL AM Albus Dumbledore's man! If you haven't figured out who the hell sent Filius' Phoenix on a merry scenic holiday through every back water village in the United Kingdom, then you're not as smart as I credited you as being. The Death Eaters are quite vexed with you regarding that. It should show up in Galway tomorrow night._

_IT WAS YOU! Filius couldn't detect who had refocused his charm._

"Careful of the rock," he warned her, as she stumbled. "You're not really dressed for walking on the beach."

_Well if Filius couldn't determine that I was the one who sent the Phoenix on a round trip tour of the United Kingdom, then that means none of the Pure Bloods who are dumber than rocks will figure it out_._Speaking of which, where the hell are your guards? I can't believe the Order decided to let you traipse about Scotland having a ocean holiday. We're the only mages within ten kilometers of here._

"This is quite good, thank you for buying me lunch," Minerva stated. She daintily, almost cat like, ate some of her fish and chips, not getting even the smallest amount of chippie sauce on her fingers, while Severus watched and remembered times long gone.

_Now, Minerva, I'm willing to offer you a trade. I'll continue being Dumbledore's man, and give you what information I can on what the Dark Lord is doing._

_What? You don't want us to welcome you back home to Hogwarts?_

_Sirius Black would stick a knife in my back before I was two paces inside the building, Min. You're probably the only one that might believe that I had nothing to with…. The Head Master…_

_I'm not the only one. Arthur Weasley believes you innocent._

_ARTHUR?_

_Yes, he's quite convinced that we made a major blunder with you. Others have been willing to listen to him. He has a Life Debt to you, and he's taking it very seriously._

_Bloody pure bloods and their bloody Life Debts!_

_Watch your language, Severus. Bad enough that I'm getting sand in my shoes thanks to you, but I won't have to listen to your bad language unless I obviously positively have to do so. Now what do you want in trade?_

Severus withdrew from her mind, and pretended to concentrate on his fish and chips. If asked, he couldn't give a concrete reason why he decided to visit a small town in Scotland, but perhaps some Higher Being had felt that Severus Snape deserved a break.

Arthur Weasley believed that he owed Severus Snape a Life Debt. He was the type of Pure Blood that took that seriously. He also had a habit of adopting assorted strays into his family. If anything happened to Severus…. Perhaps Arthur would take his child and raise it. He was probably the only one who would give the child a fair shot.

_If anything happens to me, I will send the two of them to you under the care of a House Elf named Nessie. I will provide what financial assistance I can. You will ask Arthur to raise the child for me, and I will consider all Life Debts to be settled between us. If he refuses, you are charged to find someone that will be willing to care for the child as its own. Once again, I swear to you that I had nothing to do with the manner of the conception of this child._

_Agreed. Though I can't give you the location of Hogwarts._

_I understand. It's too risky for you if I am caught, and Filius can't keep Translocating the school to a new spot._

_How will we be in contact?_

_Go to the bookstore closest to where the Phoenix burns. The note will find whichever Order member you send._

_Severus. Do you have any idea what happened to Albus? His portrait arrived right after he was ambushed at the Parley. He woke soon afterwards, but all he does is scream. He doesn't speak, he just screams._

_His__ portrait... screams?  
_

_Yes… it arrived far sooner than I expected it. Usually the portrait shows up a few hours after the person's death, but for him to speak so soon?_

_He resigned, Minerva. That's the only explanation. If he was still Hogwart's Head Master when they captured him, they would have been able to locate the school. Instead, he resigned, and doing so he broke the bond between the Head Master and the School. It was the ultimate act of protection. Minerva, I swear to you on my soul that I have no idea what they did to the Head Master._

_I need to go, Severus. Take care of yourself._

_You also, Minerva._

_Severus? I believe that you'll be a good father, irregardless of the child's irregular conception._

Severus was still staring at her as she walked away from him. He wiped his eyes due to the damn salt air, and when he looked for her, she was gone.

* * *

He returned back to Head Quarters using a round about method that added a good ninety minutes to his trip. The thousand and one minor clues that might have led to someone realizing that he had a brief trip to Stonehaven had been deliberately removed. There was no sand in his shoes, and his breath was fresh and minty. The books had been miniaturized and were in his frock coat pocket, waiting the chance to be read with any tell tale traces of the bookstore long gone. In his other pocket, he had a large bag of the various sweets that the Head Master had enjoyed. 

After all, Al might experience cravings for sweets, and as the father to be, he should provide for his needs.

Not too many, as he didn't want Al developing an issue with his sugar. He found Al in bed, in the fetal position, tightly clutching Nessie the House Elf, who appeared unable to free herself from his grasp except through the use of magic.

"Al's tummy hurt. Al cried and cried. Nessie put a Hot Water Bottle on his belly, but Al grabbed Nessie. Nessie gave Al some of the red vial! Al fell asleep and Nessie couldn't free Nessie!"


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer # 1 - Not my characters.  
Disclaimer # 2 - non con, mpreg, preg, Albus!Whumping! House Elf alert

* * *

With quick, efficient movements, Severus managed to separate a rather clingy Al from Nessie. Crisply, he ordered the House Elf to assist him in helping Al to stand. It took some physical effort, especially since Severus was trying to be gentle, but he somehow managed to get Al standing without the use of magic. Al's hands were still tightly clenched over his belly, and his shoulders were slouched. 

"We're taking you to Gaeta, Al," Severus gently informed the mannequin that wore the Head Master's face. Then he managed to keep an exasperated sigh from exiting his lips. Al had no comprehension about what he was saying, so why was he bothering to talk to him? "See Mediwitch? Al feel better?"

Then he half dragged, half carried Al to the fireplace in order to Floo them to the infirmary. With a bright puff of green smoke, the unlikeliest of trios were on their way.

* * *

First thing his sensitive nose noticed was that the dark infirmary reeked of disinfectant. Poppy would have been having kittens if her infirmary had ever smelled like this. Gaeta Mulgrew, a dark haired, hatchet faced woman who had once been a Ravenclaw until she came to the sanguine conclusion that she enjoyed inflicting pain far more than the pursuit of knowledge, growled when she saw the three of them. 

"Sit down; you're fifth in the queue." She snapped. "Unless there is a serious problem which will allow you to queue-jump to the front. Any bleeding? Cramping? Vomiting? Fever? Headache? Fits?"

"He was clutching his belly," Severus explained. "He appeared to be in agony."

"Men!" Gaeta dramatically spat, her distaste for the 'fairer' sex readily apparent to Severus. "It's pain from the pseudo-womb. I always knew that if men had to carry children, the human race would die out. It's heartening that the great Albus Dumbledore has successfully proven my hypothesis."

There was a chorus of bitter barks of laughter from the assorted women in the waiting room, all of whom were in various stages of pregnancies.

"Regardless, I wish him _**seen**_," Severus growled.

"How sweet,' Gaeta retorted. "Your concern is just so touching."

Severus was about to reply in kind, fighting snark with sarcasm, when his foot was tapped. Turning to face the miscreant that had the nerve to distract him from his verbal battle, he found that he was face to face with a roundly pregnant Cissy Malfoy. She shook her head slightly, warning him not to push the issue, and she pointed to a small private niche. There were three seats.

"I'm next in queue," she dryly stated. "Why don't we sit and catch up? It appears that something significant has happened to you since we last chatted."

"Cissy, you look well," Severus politely stated as he sat down next to her. He imperiously pointed to the seat next to him, and Al just stood where he was, his blank blue eyes wide open. To Severus' astonishment, Al's body was wracked with tremors.

"Al sits down!" Nessie explained. She pulled Al next to the seat, and then not so gently forced him to sit. The House Elf stood guard next to her adored Al and she was stroking his hand. "Al no needs to be afraids. Master here! Kind Master!"

"Al, it's ok. You soon will feel better." Severus quietly stated, adding his quieter assurance to Nessie's more vocal declarations.

Al continued to tremble, and Severus hesitantly began stroking Al's gnarled and knotted hand with his thumb. On his sea holiday in Stonehaven, Severus had picked up assorted supplies in order to help Al regain his agility in his hands. Perhaps Nessie could oversee Al soaking his hands in melted candle wax as the heat might help them regain their nimbleness; maybe she could even learn to massage Al's hands. Al might never flick and swish his wand again, but perhaps he'd able to once again button and unbutton his clothes.  
_  
It's ridiculous that you're putting this much effort into him! Do you really hope that one day; the Head Master will wake up? Do you think he'll be happy when he realizes that his belly's the size of a kettle drum complete with your bastard inside merrily drumming away? Or that his hands are so distorted and twisted that he can barely use a fork? Do you think that he'll appreciate how Nessie has styled his hair?_

_I must do this for the Head Master. He alone believed that I was worthy of redemption, even when I knew that I was utterly unsalvageable. The Head Master put a great deal of effort into me. I can only hope to return his goodwill now. _

"How is he?" Cissy softly questioned. Her blue eyes looked at the beribboned Al and then quickly looked away. It was obvious that Al made her quite uncomfortable.

"Damaged," was Severus' simple answer.

"I was there," she whispered, hiding her face behind her hands, and also using a Silencing spell so there was no chance anyone could follow their conversation. "I never liked him. His pro-Gryffindor, pro-Muggle feelings were clear, but… he didn't deserve what they did to him. A clean death would have been far more humane, though the Dark Lord has never been particularly compassionate to his enemies, let alone those that willingly follow him."

"I don't know what they did to him," Severus readily confessed. "I thought he was quite dead until he showed up in my bed like a complimentary chocolate. The Dark Lord does not choose to reveal everything to his followers."

_Much like the Head Master. I bet that Minerva never knew that he was heading off to the Parley until after he had fallen. She never would have let him go alone!  
_  
"They surrounded him, and then cut him down like a dog. He laughed, telling the Dark Lord that he had made a major mistake. My dear sister Bellatrix was quite vexed that a laughing Albus had the gall to disparage the Dark Lord, and in her zealousness to defend his honor, she Cruciated Albus. Then it was utter insanity, a pack of rabid dogs fighting over a table scrap. Dozens of mages Cursing him, while Albus continued to laugh. His amusement only succeeded in angering them, and they then….became… creative. It was… inventive and exquisite torture, Severus, as they wanted to shatter him. His laughter turned to screams…. And then… the Grand and Glorious Albus Dumbledore began pleading for death. In time, his plaintive entreaties stopped, and he spoke no more. Most believed he died, but Lucius knew that the Dark Lord had plans for him. The Dark Lord is quite pleased with you, and he has rewarded you."

Her frightened blue eyes looked into his, and she swallowed.

"That shattered wreck of a man could easily be you or me if we displease the Dark Lord." Cissy softly admitted. "I warn you to be wary of your new bed toy, Severus. Unlike others that we know, I do not believe that he was so effortlessly crushed. I risk telling you this, but you were always so considerate to Draco. There's something in his eyes that night… that still frightens me. I believe that behind his eyes, there is a smoldering fury that is utterly unrestrained by intelligence."

She reached for his hand, and gently squeezed it.

"Perhaps, you could come for dinner one night?" Cissy softly requested. For the first time in their conversation, her tone brightened, as Cissy did so love to entertain. Her parties had been well renowned in the society pages regarding the sophistication and glamour. Not that he ever regularly read the society pages in the Daily Prophet, but occasionally Pomona and Septima had cackled over an exciting tidbit in the Staff Room. "You can bring… _him_... Lucius will enjoy the chance for entertainment that he presents."

"Malfoy!" Gaeta growled from behind a curtain. "Get into cubicle B."

"Be chary of Gaeta. She likes to inflict pain, and she was the witch given responsibility for Albus' care after he was Cruciated. His mind may be gone, but I see that he's cognizant enough to be fearful of her." Cissy then murmured a good bye before she awkwardly stood with his assistance.

"Cissy? What ever happened to his Phoenix? I thought it had died with him," Severus questioned. "Do I need to fear that his familiar will appear, seeking vengeance?"

It took a moment for her to catch her breath before she answered. Her voice was quizzical as she didn't understand his question. Severus didn't understand why he was asking about Fawkes… but if the Head Master still lived… perhaps so did the Phoenix. Phoenix's tears were legendary, as they possessed healing properties.

But that thought was quickly ridiculed. If Fawkes hadn't wept when the Death Eaters had destroyed the Head Master's mind, then his heart was made of stone.

_Fawkes? Do you still live?_

"It was repeatedly Cursed and it burned. All that was left of it was a Phoenix feather. Lucius delivered it along with Albus' hat to that Minerva witch." Then with the awkward grace of late pregnancy, she inelegantly waddled to the cubicle.

He unthinkingly had continued to stroke Al's hand during his conversation with Cissy, and he realized that the gesture hadn't succeeded in calming Al one iota. That left Delving. Severus gathered his thoughts and attempted to gently Delve into Al's mind. The ease in which he penetrated Al's mind frightened him anew. What exactly had they done to Al?

_**Sev protects Al.**__** No one will hurt Al while Sev is near. Sev keeps Al safe. Al trusts Sev.  
**_

Severus repeated that mantra for some time, long enough for Cissy to leave, and Gaeta to request her next torture victim. In time, Al calmed, and his constant quaking fortunately slowed to only an occasional tremor. Nessie no longer had Al's paw tightly clenched in her grip, no, now, she was wrapped around one of his legs, gibbering wildly. Both of Al's hands were once more cradling his stomach, and Al moaned softly. Then to Severus' utter astonishment, Al decided to rest his head on his shoulder as though seeking comfort, and he kept it there until it was their time to see Gaeta.

* * *

"Undress him, and put him in the stirrups," Gaeta brusquely ordered. "Arse on the edge of the table, feet in the stirrups." 

"Is there something with which to cover him?" Severus questioned.

"You're supposed to bring your own supplies. I don't have spare linen or gowns for exams. If you don't have a gown for him, he can do the exam stark bullock naked, as I need easy access to various bits. If you do have linen, drape him as you see fit." Her tone was curt, and she glared at Severus in disapproval. "Are you embarrassed? You haven't seen him naked yet? You haven't tried out bareback broomstick riding yet?"

"I must have missed that memo where I am supposed to supply you with the basic necessities. Perhaps after you examine him, you can provide me a detailed list of what is expected of me?" Severus kept his voice composed, as Al's shakes had returned with a vengeance. He refused to even acknowledge the comment about barebacking Al, as further contemplation of that idea would ensure that Gaeta was a large pile of smoldering ashes.

"Be back in five. Have him prepped, or I'll go to the next cubicle," Gaeta snapped.

"Your bedside manner is… rather acerbic," Severus retorted.

She glared at him, and he matched her stare. To his delight, she looked away.

"Be back in five."

* * *

He took three hair ribbons from Al's hair and Transfigured them into sheets. That done, the worst part of the ordeal for Severus was left. 

"Sit," Severus ordered Al. With a gentle push, he shoved Al toward the exam table. When Al felt the back of the table hit his arse, combined with Severus' hands on his shoulder, he got the idea to sit. "Now, it's time to get undressed."

With trembling hands, Severus began undressing Al. Striving to keep his thoughts pure; he kept his eyes focused on Al's eyes. Those vacant blue eyes that formerly had been so full of life and whimsy had killed any desire Severus might have felt toward the Head Master. His peccadilloes were for the intellectuals after all, not the hard bodied studs with nary a brain cell between their ears. Severus didn't mind a little softness in his lovers, as he was no great looker. Brilliant brains and agile hands were what attracted him, and Al lacked what once the Head Master had possessed in such quantity.

Al was speedily undressed and positioned onto his back. It took far longer to get Al's legs in the stirrups, as Al refused to bend his legs. Severus was busy guiding/forcing Al's tense left leg into position when the sheet accidentally slipped, ensuring that he got quite the gander. Merlin's beard, stonking didn't even begin to describe it. Somewhere out there, a Hippogryph was no doubt uncontrollably weeping, bemoaning the fact that his equipment had been switched at birth, leaving him physically short changed and subjected to intense ridicule by all the female hippogryphs. Savagely, he chastised himself for even thinking such squicky thoughts. Merlin blast it, it had been far too long for him, and it certainly didn't help that these days he was being regularly taunted and titillated by several well hung souls that he never would have before dared dream possessed such attributes.

First Arthur, now Al!

It was enough to drive a celibate man into the arms of a prostitute.

The sacrificial victim suitably propped for the pagan ritual, Severus then carefully rechecked the linen that he had draped over Al. Every private bit was covered, and he wasn't surprised when Gaeta entered the room with a complete lack of anything resembling decorum. He was astonished that the Mediwitch was followed by several other witches in tow, though.

"My assistants," Gaeta shortly declared. "If this doesn't actually kill him, we'll be seeing more men like this in short order. They'll need the experience."

_Yes, you wouldn't want to lose any Pure Bloods. Al is just a shell, after all._

She pulled up the sheet covering Al's torso and belly, and she began to energetically palpate his belly. To Severus, the Mediwitch looked like nothing than a shrew viciously kneading a loaf of bread. For good measure, having not inflicted enough pain on Al, she began tapping her right index and middle fingers over her left fingers as she examined his abdomen.

"Point tenderness," she off handedly mentioned when a quivering Al whimpered and flinched at a particularly vicious percussion. That done, his breasts were thoroughly examined, squeezed and prodded, as she examined them for masses. or she claimed. Severus believed that she just wanted to watch Al flinch when she pinched and twisted his nipples. Then the conversation began to descend into such arcane words as Fundal height, fetal age verses gestational age, and the location of Al's pubic bones. The harpies had a loud conversation regarding Al's advanced age, and the slim odds that he'd actually survive this ordeal.

The suggestion of Al's highly probable mortality truly frightened him. He really gazed at the shivering Al, for the first time truly comprehending how thin Al was now compared to the Head Master's far more robust form. Knowing the Head Master's personal preferences for what he would and wouldn't eat as well as Severus did, he should be able to ensure that Al put back on the weight he had lost. Merlin's scrote, Al had easily lost three stones, if not more!

He'd have to be firm with Nessie, and not allow her to give Al sweets unless he ate a proper meal first. Ignoring the slight nudge from his conscience, as after all, he had bought a rather large bag of sweets for Al.

Severus again Delved in Al's mind.

_**Al is not alone. Sev is here. Al is safe. Safe**_.

He wasn't expecting a response, but Severus sensed a low moan of pain.

_**Al? Are you there? Talk to me!**_

Nothing.

* * *

"It's the pseudo womb," Gaeta explained, after a rather long, sadistic torture session, which included, in Severus' firm opinion, a truly unnecessary pelvic exam where the Mediwitch and her assistants nearly swooned in delight when they saw Al's pride and joy, a truly magnificent twelve inch Sambucus wand. He had growled then, a low, threatening sound that would have caused Remus Lupin in his wolf form to dribble pee down his legs, and the witches immediately wiped the drool off their chins. 

The witch appeared distinctively unsympathetic when he requested information on what could be done to ease Al's pain. "It's attached itself to various internal organs, and there's a bit of pain involved while everything gets hooked up and adjusted. He should be as right as rain in a few days, until then, it's just a slight bellyache."

More like an attack of appendicitis, Severus thought.

"On the positive side, it's a permanent addition to his body, so the next time he conceives, he won't have the pain. I'll have to remember to whip up a Pain Potion if the Dark Lord decides that this trial should be expanded to include other wizards."

"Next time?" Severus questioned. "Don't you think we should get him through the first time? Now tell me, I'm assuming that the child will be born through cesarean. He's not going to develop the various assorted female bits necessary for a regular birth, is he?"

"Female bits? He'll have the swollen tits, yes. But do you mean an exit hole? No, your pet won't develop a vadge," sniped one of the assistants.

Marshaling his disgust, he gifted such a look of loathing on the girl that she actually squeaked and hid behind another assistant who wasn't having any of that.

"I am bent." Severus stated his sexual preference proudly. "I am a poof, a pillow-biter, a beater boy. I play Quidditch for the other team. I am also significantly more powerful in magic than you are. Most importantly, you fail to realize the significance of who my little Pet is. The Dark Lord's foremost foe was impregnated with my child and gifted to me _by the Dark Lord_. You may not feel the need to treat my Pet with respect, but I can assure you that if the Dark Lord asks my opinion on the medical care my child is currently receiving, I will _**not**_ be kind. I will let you enjoy the novelty of his pregnancy _this once_. But know this, if you fail to improve your attitude, I will be most assuredly angered."

Long since secure in his god given ability to terrify a group of hormonal teenagers, he easily managed to further intimidate the harpies.

"And you will not like that…" he vowed. For good measure, he decided to smile. For some reason, the very sight of Severus Snape gleefully smiling caused students to faint, lesser men to turn pale, and most sane women to run like hell. Perhaps the reaction was because he so rarely smiled.

"Nessie, please assist Al in getting clothed, as it's long past time for us to leave," Severus snapped. He made no effort to hide his displeasure, and then Severus twisted the knife. "Gaeta, you will give me a list of instructions on what I will need to bring next time, as you're so ill supplied. I trust that a full robe that opens in the front will be acceptable?"

The Mediwitch babbled for a bit, but at the end, he left the infirmary with a poultice and several parchments of instructions. Virtuously, he made the tough decision to allow Nessie rub the poultice on Al's stomach, as he was… weak. It wasn't that he'd actually progress to more than thinking regretfully lewd thoughts about the Head Master and what might have been, but still Al was a defenseless child.

It just wouldn't be proper to rub Al's painful tummy while he fantasized about fondling the Head Master's wand.

It had been a very long time indeed for Severus since he had so much as a mindless grope fest, let alone a real relationship.

Plus, Nessie just so bloody eager about the sprogling besides being so useful with Al that he decided she deserved the reward of "massaging" the baby. He would discuss with her what bonding the child entailed, and then bind her to the child and Al. Perhaps, Nessie would find out that she had gotten in over her little House Elf Ears, but Nessie would know that at the first sign of trouble to take Al to Minerva.

If that happened, most likely he would be dead, so he wouldn't have to worry about an overly enthusiastic Minerva murdering him for getting Al up the duff. Minerva was a Scot after all. The witch truly enjoyed Quidditch with a blood thirsty fervor, and he knew just how well she'd react to this.

That's why he had decided not to reveal to her the truth when they had met in Stonehaven. She would have instinctively blasted him where he had stood, still clutching one of her recommended _**Pregnancy for Daft Buggers**_ books. Speaking of which, he had a lot of reading ahead of him. Best get started on it tonight.

* * *

Minerva returned to Hogwarts, feeling invigorated and refreshed, truly capable of leading a successful insurgency against overwhelming odds. She had shamelessly stolen a time turner and had actually been away from Hogwarts for eight delightful hours. First had been Stonehaven, then Glasgow, London and Galway. Galway had been a reconnaissance sortie though, as she had lightly charmed the city. If a fiery Phoenix appeared near the Spanish Arch as someone had promised, she'd be one of the first ones to know. 

Deliberately, the witch refused to do so much as think about the enigmatic Severus Snape, wanting to enjoy her first-rate frame of mind for as long as it lasted. She had a bag full of smutty reading material that Min had carefully Transfigured into a brooch so no one would the wiser, and she had a delightful meal of fish and chips. Best of all, she had Chippie Sauce for the first time in years, with her meal! Her good mood lasted for all of two seconds, as she was greeted by two grim specters, one tall, one short. Remus Lupin and Filius Flitwick.

"My quarters," she brusquely demanded. "Now, everyone smile. We need to look confident and assured."

"And sunburned," Remus cheerfully added. "You got some sun, Min!"

"I'm blushing because I'm being greeted by two such handsome wizards," she easily retorted.

"Min," Filius dryly protested. "Please. Yes, I'm quite handsome, but really… Remus is a little young for you."

She bared her teeth at Filius and hissed. For good measure, she made a clawing gesture with her hand, warning him that he'd need to be wary next time she visited his quarters. Because if he wasn't careful, he'd find all his silken drapes ruined by a rather irate cat.

"Temper, Min." Filius chortled. Then in a quieter voice, he whispered. "A lot has happened while you're aware. Can I suggest moving faster?"

"Perhaps the infirmary might be the best place to start?" Remus suggested. "No one's been hurt… but it's Albus' portrait."

* * *

Minerva stood in a back room of the infirmary. She had almost forgotten about this small room, and the witch hadn't realized that this cheerful room was where the portrait Albus had been 'resting'. She had to be careful about looking at the painting, for it was a complete match of the room, complete with a smaller canvas on the wall, which in turn had a still smaller painting… In the painting, Albus Dumbledore was now wearing a bright green dressing gown, and he was resting peacefully in a large bed, with a stuffed House Elf doll protectively sheltered in his arms. The doll had seen better days, as one ear appeared to have been chewed off by a previous owner. But in spite of its bedraggled appearance, the doll still wore a happy, cheerful smile on its face as though the doll was thrilled to be snuggling next to Albus. 

But the doll wasn't the strangest part. That honorable distinction belonged to Albus' hair and beard.

"They're… braided…" Minerva said inanely.Left unmentioned were the ribbons that were intricately weaved into each braid. She then weakly sat down on the physical bed, belatedly wondering if she would squash the portrait Albus who was sleeping in the same bed, just completely transposed into the painting. "There must be **_hundreds _**of braids."

"One hundred and seventy three plaits," Filius confirmed. "Plus there's a phonograph in the painting. I spoke to Rowena who held a Council of the Portraits, and they confirmed that the Stuffed House Elf doll and Phonograph have never been in a portrait of Hogwarts, so it shouldn't be there. Speaking of the Council, we've had to get the Trolls, the Centaurs, three eagles and the Minotaur to stand guard, as all the portraits wanted to take a gander at Albus."

"Dilys? You said Phineas said that Albus spoke last night?" Minerva questioned.

"Yes, he wanted to know what we had done to him." Dilys stated. "His precise words were 'What have you done to me?'. When I examined him, he screamed, 'Hurts. Hurt Al. Stop! No! Stop. Stop. Stop. Make it stop!', I continued to speak to him, and he has not responded, though he did moan a few hours ago. He grew drowsy and fell asleep clutching the rag doll."

"Al?" Minerva asked."He's never used Al even as nickname."

"He's also never braided his hair like that. As long as I've known him, he's always worn it down. Sometimes, he'll wear it restrained into one plait, but nothing anywhere near that elaborate," Filius inserted. "Plus he's never been one for hair ribbons."

"Do you hear… music?" Minerva questioned. Merlin's bloody pants, she wasn't cracking from the stress was she? But even if it meant everyone thought she had gone absolutely barmy, she would state that she heard music from the phonogram.

"Joplin," Filius confirmed so quickly that Minerva almost sighed her relief. "Scott Joplin. I played that piece at one of the musical concerts, Min. You were here then, I believe?"

Vaguely, she remembered the concert. The Charms Master was always adding something new to the concerts to expand their understanding of the musical world. Yes… Joplin… ragtime… Filius' nimble fingers had danced across the keyboard, and Albus had been delighted, nearly dancing in his chair because of his enjoyment. Even Fawkes had made an unheard of appearance in order to appreciate the music.

"Yes. I was here for that concert. Severus was here also. I think it was his first year that he taught, and Albus insisted that he attend," Minerva then swallowed, as she remembered that night very well, as she had been deeply affected that the dour Severus Snape had been so mesmerized by the music. Not just Joplin, but Bach, Gershwin, Rimsky-Korsakov, Prokofiev and Dvorak.

"Speaking of Severus, I met him on my travels," Minerva raised her hand to silence their questions. "Let's figure this out first before we start focusing on that thorny issue. Yes, I'm here. Yes, I wasn't followed. Yes, it was stupid of me not to immediately hex Severus and bring him here. Yes, I triple checked, and do you really believe that I wouldn't notice if I were being followed?"

"Well, thank you for answering all our questions. Since you've reassured me that I don't need to fear a Death Eater attack, I think I'll just go to bed now," Filius snarked.

"Dilys? What do you think?" Remus questioned, attempting to get the conversation back on track. "You've spoken to Rowena, I know."

The Healer-Head Mistress of Hogwarts was a formidable witch. She couldn't be a shrinking soul, not if she had led both St. Mungo's and Hogwarts, but now the redoubtable Dilys looked as though she'd rather face a herd of dragons unwanded.

"Rowena and I have discussed this matter thoroughly," she slowly admitted. "And we've come to the conclusion that it's possible that…Albus is still alive."

"What?" Minerva spat. "Malfoy said he was _dead_."

"We're not sure, Minerva. But if he's alive, his soul is damaged, Minerva. What we're possibly seeing is manifestations of what is occurring to him now."

"So someone's tucked him into bed, complete with a dolly?" Minerva didn't even bother to hide her incredibility. That thought was preposterous, and she looked at Remus to judge his reaction.

"Besides braiding his hair, and giving him a nicer dressing gown then what he was originally wearing this morning," Filius helpfully added.

"Let's not forget the phonogram. It was playing classical music a few minutes ago." Remus inserted.

"What is your other hypothesis?" Minerva asked.

"That Albus is in fact, dead, and the trauma of his death has caused his portrait to go mad," Dilys slowly admitted.

Her head was pounding, her good mood long gone, and she began to rub her temples.

"Either way, Albus is as good as dead to us. His portrait is unable to offer us any constructive advice in our war," Minerva crisply decided, though inwardly her grieving heart was ripped apart anew. "Therefore, Dilys, continue to observe his portrait. Any changes, please contact me immediately."

Minerva paused and then waved her hand. "On second thought, you don't need to inform me if his hair style changes. Though if he decides to shave off his beard, let me know, as I've never seen him beardless. I do have my doubt that he possess a chin."

Her attempt at a funny quip failed, though Remus quirked a smile. The three of them left the 'resting' room, and went to Poppy's office. The Mediwitch saw them, and nodded. She would join them in her office as soon as she was able.

"Remus and Filius, what was our other problem?" Minerva questioned as she collapsed into a chair.

"The Weasleys," Remus explained. "Molly wants out of the Room of Requirement. She's a little vexed about us declaring her dead."

"A little?" Filius snorted. "She nearly hexed off my nether regions."

"How's Arthur?" Minerva's voice was colored with her concern. "Is he…?"

"He spoke a little, but mainly, he's… quiet. He's not doing well, Min," Remus slowly admitted.

"Now, I want to talk to you two about my discussion with Severus. I'll need Poppy's input also, as Severus had a request for Arthur."

"Merlin save my sanity, you are carrying messages for Severus? What does he want Arthur to do?" Filius questioned.

"Thank you for not muttering about how it was a mistake for me to go on holiday," Minerva quipped. "I know you're both thinking it, but thank you for not saying it out loud. Severus is to be a father in a few months. He's willing to continue spying for us, but he wants assurances that if anything happens to him, that Arthur will be willing to raise the child."

"Merlin's scrote, did someone spike my tea?" Filius questioned. "Severus? To be a father? I thought the boy played for the other Quidditch team."

"Arthur? Severus wants… Arthur?" Remus repeated that several times, as though apparently unable to process that thought.

"Because probably Severus believes that Arthur would be the only one willing to give the child a fair chance," Minerva explained. "He does have a tendency of taking in strays, Remus. I don't mean any offense, you understand. Any more questions?"

"Do they make baby clothes in black?" Filius quipped.

Minerva McGonagall gave Filius Flitwick the McGonagall Glare of disapproval, and it affected him not at all. Well, least not the way she had intended as the Charms Master began giggling. Remus then began chortling, and then Minerva shook her head in disbelief before she smiled.

"Maybe I can ask someone to make up a toddler's size robe, as no doubt Severus will teach his child the fine arts of billowing robes," Minerva retorted before she, too, began to laugh.


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer # 1 - Not my characters.

Disclaimer # 2 - non con, mpreg, preg, Albus!Whumping! House Elf alert

* * *

Severus endured a long, nonproductive meeting with his fellow Death Eaters which had been nothing more than an excuse to have a jolly party in order to mock the cock jockey regarding the happy tidings. As always, Severus ignored their crude jocularity, and then left them as soon as he could safely do so. 

Severus entered his quarters with a sense of profound relief, and to his rather acidic surprise, his little family wasn't waiting to greet him. One would hope that as the Dad of the Dysfunctional Snape Family, he'd be greeted with loud acclamation when he came home late from work. You know, after a day of slaughtering innocents, wrecking havoc and general mayhem, was it too truly much to expect that his mindless, pregnant spouse be waiting for him complete with a vacant, adoring smile? Perhaps Nessie would be energetically dancing about the room in her gleeful excitement that Daddy was once again home, safe, sound and no body parts missing?

Alas, his happy homecoming was not in the stars for him.

But at least Nessie had ensured that he had dinner waiting for him. Eating his reheated curry in his lonely kitchen wasn't quite as good as scarfing down hot Fish and Chips, while exchanging sarcastic barbs with Minerva, but at least Nessie had remembered that he existed. What with her new toy taking up all her time, he should be grateful for such small kindnesses.

The answer for why he was not greeted at the door was apparent when Severus entered his bedroom. The phonogram was still playing music softly, as he had charmed it to play tunes that he thought Al would like before he had left for work. Severus had remembered what music the Head Master had enjoyed, and he hoped that Al had similar tastes.

His problem child Al was asleep in the bed, and he was cuddling a slumbering Nessie who had a ear to ear grin plastered on her silly little face. The House Elf had changed Al for bed, putting her charge into a new dressing gown which appeared to have been one of his better ones magically resized to fit Al. The always resourceful House Elf had easily outdone herself as she had redone his hair and beard in an intricate style with easily a billion braids.

'That's so not fair, Al," Severus softly protested to his sleeping bedmate. "You've been here two days, Al. You're turned my life completely topsy turvy. You've taken over my bed; you've commandeered my House Elf."

Maybe commandeered wasn't the correct term, as Nessie was head over heels for her new best friend. Al, much like the Head Master had once been, was wholly oblivious to the fanatical devotion he inspired in lesser creatures such as Nessie and Severus.

_**Nessie, guard your heart, for he unknowingly will steal it away, and leave you bereft. **_

"At least you left me some room in the family bed," Severus quietly sniped. "Though if you add anyone else to bed, I'm going to be quite vexed."

Severus silently stripped out of his work clothes quickly, not bothering to leave the room. He wasn't flaunting his bits, as it was highly likely that Al would actually appreciate the raree show, after all. Then Severus crawled into bed, marveling at how much space Al managed to stake as his own. It was his last thought before he quickly fell asleep.

* * *

Minerva McGonagall, Brave Warrior, War Hardened Survivor of over a Thousand Battles of both the great and small variety, refused to show her fear, especially against such a valiant foe as Molly Prewett Weasley. Let others foolishly dismiss Molly as merely an overly devoted mother, but Minerva knew that there was nothing as fearsome as a cornered Mother Bear, especially one related to Fabian and Gideon Prewett. 

"Minerva, you declared us DEAD!" Molly roared for the sixth time in this particular painful conversation. "Our family believes that we're dead!"

"I made the decision," Minerva readily admitted, refusing to place the blame for the decision on any other shoulders than her own. "I truly wish there had been another option, but I could not risk Severus' involvement becoming known if the news of your escape became widespread. I can not jeopardize his potion."

"So, you're protecting the man that _**betrayed**_ Albus?" Molly then gracelessly collapsed into a heavily cushioned chair, and then she glared silver daggers at a noticeably nervous Remus. "You didn't even try to stop her? You could have suggested another way, Remus! You supposedly were the smart one!"

"Molly, please calm down," Arthur whispered. With an awkward gesture that seemed more appropriate to a shy, gawky adolescent than a long time married man, he tenderly rubbed Molly's hand. "It's imperative… for the baby… that you don't get upset, love."

For some reason, Arthur's uncertain caress seemed to settle Molly's ruffled feathers, as his wife placed her hand firmly over Arthur's hand. The two Weasleys stared deeply into each other's eyes and then Arthur looked away first. He didn't see the look of hurt on Molly's face, which she quickly hid. Instead, she put on her Brave Face.

"Don't you care that our children believe that we're _**dead**_, Arthur?" Molly softly questioned.

"Minerva's right, you know. This war is far bigger than us and our family," was his rather subdued answer. "I've caused you so much….pain recently… that I so wish that I could agree with you Molly, and there was another way…to handle this. But we've come this close to completely losing the war, Molly. If Minerva believes in Severus…thinks his assistance will help the fight… I have to agree with her…. Bill, as the eldest, will keep his eyes on our children… He'll keep them from harm."

Arthur took his hand away from Molly, and to Minerva's alarm, he seemed to shrink inwards onto himself. The witch hadn't truly looked at Arthur since his rescue, and Min was quite distressed by what she now saw. His blue eyes were red-rimmed and Arthur appeared mentally battered and physically exhausted. Gone was the positive good-naturedness she had always associated with the Weasley name, and in its place was a bitter sorrow that seemed to have sapped his strength. His incarceration and the events had occurred during it still weighed heavily on his brutalized soul.

_We need to get him help. But who?_

"Arthur? Are you alright?" Minerva gently questioned. When Arthur failed to answer, she turned towards Remus and quirked an eyebrow.

The werewolf shook his head in a quick gesture, and softly whispered in her ear. "This is the most he's spoken since he woke, Minerva. Most of the time, Arthur refuses to speak and he just stares at the wall. He isn't even interested in playing with his plugs and his batteries."

"Minerva, you can't leave us in here," Molly protested. In a softer voice that only Minerva could hear, Molly softly pleaded, "He'll go mad in here."

No, Merlin's braided and gaily beribboned beard, not another damaged soul for whom she needed to find a cure. Arthur needed real help, not the well meant intentions of a tired woman leading an insurgency in a war that she had no hope of winning.

"There's another issue that I need to discuss with you," Minerva then paused, and inhaled a long, slow breath. She could just imagine how well Molly would take this request. "It's Severus. He is to be a father in a few months."

"That poor, poor child," was Molly's immediate caustic response.

Biting back her tongue, as she couldn't chastise Molly for thinking what she herself had first thought, Minerva struggled to continue.

"He's willing to continue to assist us what ever matter he can, he just requests that if anything happens to him, that you and Arthur…." Minerva had to stop before she continued. Even being the very model of Gryffindor courage couldn't give her enough guts to feel comfortable with what she was about to request.

"He wants us to raise his child?" Arthur softly questioned, his sharp mind putting it all together.

While Molly moaned her displeasure with the very idea of raising Severus' child, Min sadly nodded her head. Arthur sighed, and he ran his hands through his thinning hair.

"What about the child's mother? Does she have any say in the matter?" Arthur softly questioned. "Does she not have family?"

"Severus said that after you two escaped he was informed that he was chosen to raise your child as his own. It appears that he was then presented…with the woman who had been impregnated. He admits that she was… damaged… and is unable to take care of the child… " Minerva slowed and then gathered her courage. In for a knut, in for a galleon. "He's willing to help, as long as his child is ensured that will be cared for if anything should happen to him… I assured him that I would give him an answer."

She had lightly cast a charm so that when the Phoenix began its fiery flight through Galway, Severus, as the spell caster of the Phoenix, would know if there was a Yay or Nay to his request. It was a complicated piece of magic which sapped her of what little energy was remaining. Now she was standing only due to sheer Scottish grit and McGonagall determination.

"That poor, poor girl to be so callously used as breeding stock," Arthur whispered, as his voice trembled and broke. "Molly? We owe Severus."

"Take that viper's child into our home?" Molly spat. "I think not."

"Severus said that if you accepted, he'd release you from all your Life Debts. He'll ensure that you have financial support, as much as he can give you. For what it's worth, Severus will also throw in a House Elf named Nessie," Minerva added the last with a slight laugh.

"Nessie? We met her." Arthur slowly admitted, as though he was reliving bitter memories. "Seems quite enthralled with Severus. Molly? What do you think?"

Molly shook her head, and firmly put her foot down, "I don't want to raise his child. We'll have our own little one soon, Arthur. I don't know if I could handle twins again."

"We owe him, Molly," was his quiet rebuttal. "It's a defenseless child, Molly. It's not its fault on how it was conceived, and it appears that Severus was not actively involved in that. The House Elf will be able to help with the child care. Haven't you always wanted help? That poor House Elf has been abused, Molly. Do you want to send her on to another that will harm her?"

She shook her head, and plaintively questioned, "I don't bloody care about Severus' bloody House Elf. Why are you suddenly so pro-Severus? I thought you didn't particularly care for him. You truly believe that he didn't kill Albus?"

"Yes, I believe that Severus spoke the truth," Arthur firmly stated.

"Why do you believe him? I need to know," Molly pleaded. She reached for Arthur's hand, and she squeezed it hard. "I want to understand, talk to me."

"Because at last I finally understand Severus," Arthur softly admitted.

"Understand?" His wife protested. "What do you mean, you understand Severus?"

"I can understand the horror being forced to do something you don't want to do. I comprehend what it's like to know that there's no way to undo that action. No wonder he's such a nasty git, as the knowledge of what you did just gnaws away at your soul until its completely devoured. You're full of self-hate and regret. Your days are full of vainly wishing that you could reverse and negate that action. But you can't, Molly, you just have to get up every morning and pray that you have enough strength to deal with the mistake you've created."

Molly paled and quickly ripped her hand from Arthur's grasp. The witch looked as though Arthur had slugged her in her belly.

"I could abort," she whispered. "I_**offered**_. There's still time."

"No, love." Arthur's voice grew shaky. "I didn't mean that our baby is a mistake."

"But you just said it was," Molly whispered.

"_**Noooo!**_… I didn't mean it like that…" Arthur softly pleaded. "You know that you and our children are everything to me. I didn't… mean… it…"

Arthur tried to reach for his wife, but she pulled away. That rejection caused the shattered man to emotionally collapsed, and he silently wept. Molly ran to his side, and she put her arm around his waist. Arthur's thin body was wracked with sobs, and he refused to speak while Molly attempted to console him.

"It's all right, love. Let it out, you need to cry. Don't let it fester," Molly assured her inconsolable husband. She kept rubbing his back in slow circles, softly urging him to voice his grief. "I know you didn't mean it the way it came out. I'm so tetchy when I'm carrying, love. You know that."

It was like watching two Quidditch teams in a mid-air collision. You watched on the sidelines, holding your breath, praying that the players wouldn't be kissing the ground in a few short moments. Propriety demanded that she look away, but her green eyes were still drawn to it. The fracturing of the Weasley marriage was occurring in front of her, and she couldn't figure out how to stop it.

"We can cast a modified Dillusionment spell on top of an Appearance Modification spell." Filius loudly suggested, attempting to remind the Weasleys that they weren't alone. "Self perpetuating. No one will notice them, and if they do, they will not recognize their voice or their appearance.. It might take me a few days to perfect the spell, but they could leave the Room of Requirement."

"Excellent idea," Remus noisily agreed. "What do you say that we _**immediately**_ leave to discuss it further?"

"Wonderful suggestion!" Filius decided in a high pitched tone. "Shall we _**go**_, Minerva?"

"I'll join you in just a moment," Minerva stated. "I need a decision. Go."

The two men, not cowards in the normal understanding of the word, still ran for the hills when the opportunity presented itself. It was obvious that their motto was, "_As fast as each opportunity presents itself, use it! No matter how tiny an opportunity it may be, use it!"  
_  
The Weasleys were still conversing, or was as far more likely, Molly was talking and Arthur was listening. Minerva turned away to give them some privacy. Her head ache had returned in full force, and she began rubbing her temples. Maybe Filius would still be willing to massage her head and neck muscles. They were so tight that they were almost rock hard. Damn Poppy and her stinginess in allocating Minerva her medication!

After a few minutes of intensive temple massaging, her headache had faded only slightly. So much to do, and she had recklessly stretched herself too thin. Using a time turner! Of all the idiocy! Minerva had added eight more hours to a day that was already crammed full of appointments and meetings. What a fool she had been, stressing her overtaxed body just for a few hours of liberty.

But if she hadn't gone, she would never have met Severus and heard his protestations that he hadn't been involved with Albus' death. Minerva would never have made a dog's breakfast out of things, leaving Severus alone among the Death Eaters after agreeing to find a home for his ill-gotten child. Most importantly, she would have never been forced to watch the strongest marriage she had ever known, one that she had always secretly envied for its very potency, crumble into ash. Her rapid pulse was madly drumming in her head, and Minerva felt like a kettle drum in the opening of Richard Strauss' _Also sprach Zarathustra._

_Damn you, Albus. Damn you for dying! Damn you for leaving me this mess!_

"Minerva, we'll take the child," Molly calmly stated, interrupting her dark thoughts. "The child deserves a fair chance, and we'll give it to him."

"Thank you. He does seem to care what happens to the child," Minerva softly admitted.

Least that's what she attempted to say, before she was struck with a migraine suitable for punishment from a wrathful God. Her vision was full of zigzagging flashing bright lights and more worrisome for Min, there was a blind spot in her left eye. That was new…

"Get Poppy," she managed to plead before she began to vomit. Her exhausted body had decided that it had given all it could for the cause, and it was shutting down.

Arthur put his arms around her, and he helped to guide her to the floor. She couldn't stop heaving her Fish and Chips onto the floor.

_**First time I have Chippie Sauce in years, and I end up hurling it on the floor!**_

"Molly's getting help." He assured her in a very quiet voice. There was something soft being pressed against her eyes, and Arthur whispered, "It's a towel. It'll block the light. My Mum had migraines. Is there anything I can do to help?"

"Nothing," she mumbled. "Need my meds."

In spite of his own personal turmoil, Arthur continued to physically support her while she heaved and heaved, until Poppy arrived. The Mediwitch quickly took control of the chaotic scene as it sounded as though the very concerned Filius and Remus had returned to the Room of Requirement when Poppy had. Before long a heavily medicated and bespelled Minerva was in the small 'resting' room in the infirmary, sleeping soundly. She was so heavily sedated that she failed to hear the portrait Albus stir slightly and whisper in a very concerned tone, "Min?"

* * *

_**Good.**_

_**Not Good**_.

The entity called Al understood these two important concepts because his life now consisted of only the Good and Not Good. The Not Goods believed him empty headed, but Al wasn't. Damaged was perhaps the better description of his current mental condition though fractured might be the most appropriate, for Al thought and pondered on the minute differences between Good and Not Good with the same dedication that Albus Dumbledore had once debated the many uses of Dragon Blood. If a Muggle psychologist was here, she would have quickly diagnosed Al as suffering from a Dissociation Disorder of some sort.

Once, there might have been more to his life than this, but those disjointed memories were fragile and tore when he pondered them. Sometimes, Al dreamed strange, wonderful imaginings, but he never understood them when he woke beyond the fact they were Good or Bad dreams. In some there was a scarlet and gold bird that sang and sang to Al, and his heart was gladdened. In others, there was a dark haired woman with green eyes who he knew… yet he didn't. She seemed so stern but yet… he remembered her laughing so hard that he had been surprised that the very walls didn't shake. In the Bad dreams, the dream he feared most was the one in which a young red headed girl died over and over again while he screamed.

Food could be Good and Not Good. Al had found that people could be Good and Not Good.

The little creature that spoke to him was Good. Bright eyed and cheerful, the little…

_**Nes**_…

Nes fed him Good food. She fed him, rather than placing a bowl on the floor or pouring it down his throat. She cleaned and dressed him.

Good.

Nes always chattered at him, and while Al failed to understand what she was saying, it was still Good to him because the Elf gleefully bounced and happily jabbered. Nes gently combed his hair and beard which was Good, because other Not Goods had pulled and ripped the snarls from his head. Also she didn't hit or kick him for being slow. Hitting Al was definitely Not Good.

Pain was also Not Good. When he had hurt, he had whimpered and mewled, trying to speak like Nes did. In his panic, Al had grabbed Nes, and she had squeaked in fear.

Not Good.

But Nes had gotten help. Dark haired man… Sev…. Who had taken him to HER. Not Good. _**Not Good.**_ Yet… Sev… stayed… spoke to him… in his _**head**_ about Goodness while SHE hurt him. NOT GOOD. _**NOT GOOD**_.

Sev Not Good. He _**watched**_ when She hurt Al.

Sev gave him new clothes. Clean clothes. Fed him. He also talked to Al as though he expected Al to understand him. And yes, Sev had given him that wonderful yellow thing. He had placed it on Al's tongue and Al had been so surprised by the tartness. He had sucked and sucked on it, savoring the sour taste and then to his disappointment it was gone so quickly. Where had it gone? Sev had laughed at his bewilderment and had given him another one. Sev Good?

Nes Good. Her Not Good. Sev Not Good – Good?

Sev snake? Why did he think of a snake when he thought of the man named Sev?

Nes rubbed his belly with something cool which eased his slight discomfort. She gleefully jabbered to him while she stroked him, and he caught one utterance as it was a word that Nes frequently used. She usually said it when she sat in his lap, and… read… to him?

_**Nigel**_.

He tried to repeat the word. His mouth moved, but Al couldn't pronounce the word. Nes continued to chatter and he once again mouthed the word, savoring it in its complexity, and striving to master it. Somehow Al knew that speech was important, that everything would be made clearer when he regained the power to talk.

_**Nigel.**_

The word having utterly defeated him, Al decided to focus his efforts on another sound that Nes frequently repeated.

_**Baybee**_.

Nes put him into the place that Sev had laid next to him earlier. He grabbed the Elf, not wanting to be alone with Not Good –Good Sev until he understood what Sev truly was. The creature happily squeaked when he clutched her close to him, joyfully repeating the _**Baybee**_ sound over and over again.

What did it mean?

He fell asleep while Nes continued to chatter, and his dreams were full of strangeness. The Good green eyed woman was in horrific pain, and somehow he knew her agony was his fault. What was her name? Al knew her. Her name was important, she was somehow significant and he struggled and wept against the evil Not Goods who cruelly kept her name from him.

Mina? Miniya? Mingat? Minnie? Minor?

"Min?" Al whispered.

The effort having exhausted him, Al drifted off to sleep, not even noticing when Not Good-Good Sev slipped into bed next to him and covered him and Nes with a blanket.


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer # 1 - Not my characters.

Disclaimer # 2 - non con, mpreg, preg, Albus!Whumping! House Elf alert

Disclaimer # 3 – foggy thoughts of AD/ED, a little mention of GW/HP

* * *

_ Al was lying in his bed, and there was a boy snuggled next to him. The younger boy had greenish skin and his face was covered with pockmarks but the wide smile that lit up his face more than overcame his physical shortcomings._

_"Thank you for helping me with my charms homework," the pockmarked boy wheezily said. His attack of dragon pox had affected his lungs, so he was prone to wheezing. "I'd never pass without your help."_

_"It's what friends are for," Al assured his friend. "Have more faith in your ability, El. You're really quite talented."_

_Their homework completed, the two boys, young men really, stayed just as they were. Snuggled like spoons, their hands were often entwined, and they were perfectly content just to enjoy their time together.._

_"Al," the greenish tinged boy whispered, unexpectedly, painfully shy. He grew bold and stated, "I __**like**__ you."_

_The pockmarked boy's bravery exhausted, he then flushed, as though fearful that his admittance would ruin their perfect friendship._

_"El," Al softly answered. "I really… really… really… like you, too…Like... Simon and Ruthie…"  
_

_Ruthie was a tart who put out, least according to their year mate Simon who loudly boasted of tasting her considerable physical charms._

_"Oi! Really?" The younger boy asked, obviously gobsmacked._

_A bashful Al blushed and nodded, his face matching his fiery hair._

_"You're not… mad?" the other boy hopefully whispered. El turned to face his friend, and there was a promising look in his eyes._

_"You know… I've been doing a lot of reading… and in ancient Greece…back then it wasn't considered shameful to be a soddomite," Al whispered. "Many of their most powerful wizards were men that liked…other… men…the way I like you…"_

_After that not very poetic declaration, the two young men mashed their mouths together, their inexperienced tongues tangling as they explored each other's mouth, and their breaths quickened. They began rubbing their bodies against each other, delighting in the new sensations that were just so… enjoyable._

_They had been lucky, an overflow of Gryffindor boys for their year had required the use of two dorms, and they had managed to acquire a room completely to themselves. Let the eight other boys of their year cram tight in their dorm, safe from interacting with the son of a feared muggle hater and his so called dimwitted sidekick. It mattered not at all to the two boys that they were social pariahs. For they had discovered the rarest of gifts, kindred spirits and mutual physical attraction. _

Al woke then, and there was someone next to him in his bed.

"El?" He whispered, as he peered at his bedmate that had black hair and sallow skin. Not El, Al sadly thought. El was Good. But where was he?

"El?" Al whispered louder, hoping that El was nearby. El would keep him safe, Al knew. El was gentle, and he'd help Al.

No answer and so Al began rubbing himself against his bedmate, wanting to remember his Good dream and how Good El felt. Al had felt warm and hot and meltie… His dreams disappeared rapidly from his damaged mind, and he wanted to treasure this Good Dream for as long as he could.

But who was El?

El was like Min but not. Both Good, but different.

Could there be _**different**_ types of Good?

His bedmate woke, and then turned to face him. It was Good Not-Good Sev who appeared seriously annoyed with Al.

"Bloody hell, Al, there will be no frotting in my bed! What will Nessie think?"

Al put his hands over his head to shield his face. It was an instinctive gesture because whenever one of the Not Goods spoke like that, pain to Al was imminent. He didn't understand what Good Not Good Sev was saying, but the acidic tone was distinctively Not Good.

"Al… I don't mean to yell at you," the Good Not Good Severus said in a gentler tone. Well, one would call it a kinder tone only if one could was looking for it as industriously as Al was. "Frotting only ensues after dinner and drinks, Al."

Good Not Good Sev barked a laugh, before gently ruffling Al's hair. Sev rolled over and then fell asleep, leaving a confused Al to ponder the strangeness of their encounter.

Good Not Good Sev made Al's head hurt.

* * *

Minerva glared at Poppy, who was not intimidated in the slightest by the ill woman whose far too colorful past was quite familiar to Poppy. Others might view Minerva as the Stern, Unyielding Bastion of the Resistance, but Poppy knew the first year student who had sulked that she couldn't try out for the Gryffindor Quidditch team even though she was far better than the team members. 

"I brought you plenty of smut, Poppy," Minerva wheedled. "Mermaids, Centaur sex and even the latest volumes of your Triple Wizards of Ashoken."

"Minerva, you're stretching yourself too thin. Are you trying to have a stroke?" Poppy protested, swayed not in the least by the thought of all that unread hot, sweaty wizard porn waiting to be devoured. "You need to take a break. Let Filius or Remus handle the rebellion for a few days. They're your Seconds. Let them support you!"

"I would if I could," Minerva admitted. "But why don't you come up to my quarters and we can drink and read bad smut?"

Poppy cursed her with language that would surprise anyone that didn't know Poppy as well as Minerva did.

"You feel better, dear?" the patient good-naturedly asked. "Venting is good for the soul and all that nonsense. Though you really shouldn't use such language in front of your victims!"

"You're impossible!" The mediwitch growled.

"I try," Minerva gleefully admitted.

"Yes, you're very trying," snapped Poppy, who added a ferocious glare for good measure.

Naturally, Poppy's Evil Eye failed to scare Minerva, worthy descendant of countless brave Celtic Warriors.

"I have a message for you," Poppy finally admitted. "Filius said to inform you, that there was a fiery phoenix merrily playing havoc in Galway last night. It sat on the Spanish Arch for a bit and sang until three dozen Death Eaters showed up to handle it. It then decided that it was long past time to leave the scene, so it then jumped into the Corrib to extinguish itself. It appears that the Death Eaters were completely incapable of handling it."

Minerva barely managed to refrain from loudly cheering from her sick bed. Like he had promised, Severus had delivered! Now she just needed to send someone to the closest bookstore to the Spanish Arch to discover if Severus had left a message.

"Sang? Any idea what tune?" Minerva questioned when it became apparent that Poppy was expecting her to freely admit ownership of the operatic phoenix.

"West End Show Tunes for a bit, before it burst into a falsetto and sang an extremely off color, exceedingly offensive version of 'Hoggy Warty Hogwarts'," Poppy sniffed. "I believe there was a stanza that described He Who Must Not Be Named's bits in extremely graphic and rather unflattering terms."

She couldn't help it; Minerva began to giggle at the very idea of the stolid Fawkes singing bawdy ditties about He Who Must Not Be Named's Shrunken and Inoperable Private Bits. When McGonagall's giggles became roars of laughter, Poppy at last joined her in laughing.

"I have to give you credit, Min. It's hard to find a word to rhyme with miniscule," Pomfrey gasped before she began uncontrollably cackling.

"Don't blame me, blame Albus!" Minerva weakly protested between gasps of laughter. "It's something he would have done!"

* * *

His little family was having a spot of breakfast when he and Al were summoned to the Dark Lord's chamber. The Dark Lord appeared to be in an arse-on mood, and Severus carefully schooled his mind. Al immediately went to pieces, squeaking, and cowering behind him. 

"My lord? Whatever is the matter?" Severus asked.

"I wish to examine Albus," the Dark Lord purred. "Events occurred last night that I believe he might have had a hand in."  
_  
Actually, truth demands that I state that it wasn't his hand that was humping my leg last night. _

"What exactly occurred, my lord?" Severus quickly questioned. "We were together last night, and in fact, he shared my bed. I can assure you that he did not leave my quarters."

There, the giggling would begin along with the muttered asides that Severus Snape was regularly topping the Head Master. It mattered not to Severus, as his presumed physical attention to the Head Master would deter others from taking an interest in playing with Al. Sometimes it was a very good thing to be feared.

"There was a burning phoenix sighted in Galway," the Dark Lord announced. "Unfortunately, your fellow Death Eaters were unable to handle the situation properly. It will be necessary for you to teach the others how to remove it in a quicker manner."

"By your command, it will be done," Severus easily agreed. "But if they were having problems, they should have immediately notified me."

"I believe your fellow Death Eaters worry about you being too highly favored, and they do not wish for you to gain still more favor with me. Such small minded jealously will naturally be punished. Nevertheless, bring Albus here as I wish to examine his mind," the Dark Lord ordered.

An unwilling Al was brought before the Dark Lord, and he mewled and shook in his fear. The Dark Lord placed one scaly hand on Al's cheek and peered into his vacant, blue eyes. Al began to shriek uncontrollably while the Dark Lord mercilessly plundered his mind, searching for the slightest spark of intelligence.

When the Dark Lord was finished, a cowering Al had collapsed in front of him. His plaintive mewling had stopped, and instead he was hysterically weeping.

"It wasn't him. He's a cabbage," the Dark Lord dismissively spat. "Take your sex toy away, Severus."

He quickly bowed in acquiesce to the Dark Lord's wishes, and he managed to grab the sobbing Al by his arm and quickly pull him away from the Dark Lord.

"It's time to go back to our rooms, Al," Severus informed him after they left the Dark Lord. "Here, have a treat for being my brave little cabbage."

Severus pressed a piece of chocolate into Al's mouth, and gently closed his mouth. The effect was miraculous, as Al stopped crying; instead his concentration was focused completely on the sweet in his mouth.

"You're a bloody cabbage, Al, but you're my cheeky chappy cabbage, my little duffed up cabbage and my responsibility," the double agent softly whispered. "Nessie will change you and put you to bed. Perhaps I'll let her give you another chockie. It's been a very rough day for you."

* * *

"Come along, Arthur," Remus gently ordered. "Filius wants to cast the spell. If we can change your appearance, you'll be able to leave the room. We've set up quarters for you two on the third floor." 

Arthur Weasley nodded his head, and Molly gave him an encouraging smile.

"Can we talk first?" Molly questioned. "Just a quick moment."

Filius nodded, and Molly pulled Arthur close to her.

"I'll go first," Arthur bravely insisted, determined to protect his wife. "Then if I'm fine, only then can you go through with it."

"Filius said that it is perfectly safe for the baby," Molly assured him. "He would know, if anyone would."

"Yes, but it's our baby, not his," Arthur gently reminded her.

The two Weasleys hugged each other, and after Arthur and Molly separated, Molly pulled her husband down to her level so she could whisper in his ear.

"Arthur… will you still be _**interested**_ if I'm no longer ginger?" Molly whispered. Her red face clashed with her ginger hair as she worried that Remus or Filius might overhear.

Yes, they hadn't been intimate in some time, but Molly still had her priorities straight.

"You're my Mollywobbles," Arthur tenderly promised. "No matter what your hair color is, no matter what you look like, you'll always be my Mollywobbles, much like I will always be your Arthur."

He kissed her on her cheek, and then he gave her a gentle smile.

"I know… I haven't been the husband you've needed… I'll try harder, love. Don't give up on me," Arthur whispered.

"Like I'd actually do that?" Molly playfully snapped. "We've been through too much together."

"That we have," Arthur agreed. With a strengthened resolve, Arthur nodded his head toward Filius. "Let's get this over with, shall we?"

The diminutive Charms Instructor gave him a cheery smile, and assured him that it wouldn't hurt a bit. Then with a muttered incarnation and fancy wand work, Arthur Weasley disappeared. He grew taller, his balding, ginger hair filled in with short, coarse salt and pepper hair. His blue eyes darkened into a dark mocha brown. He grew a neat full beard, and put on a little weight, growing broader in his shoulders. Even his glasses changed to a dark metal frame.

"Wow. That was interesting," Arthur said in a deep voice, as he took off his glasses. "Now I have a new found sympathy for sausage skins. You get stretched and pulled and stuffed. It's the most unnatural experience."

He looked at his grim wife, and realized that perhaps his comments were a tad unhelpful.

"But it's over quickly and it didn't hurt a lick," he quickly assured his Mollywobbles.

"You still stand like Arthur," Remus explained. "Do you still need the glasses?"

"I'm afraid so," Filius said. "But I changed the style. Rather spiffy pair if I do say so myself."

"Now, I'll take you to Poppy, and hopefully she says that everything's in the right spot. How do you feel, Arthur?" Filius questioned.

"Fine," Arthur assured him. "Shall we be off?"

"Yes, but Arthur, you can not speak to your children," Remus reminded him. "I know it will be difficult, but it's very important."

"I understand," Arthur promised. "But I need a new name. Molly? Do you think you could call me Gideon?"

"It's a wonderful name," she tenderly agreed, her eyes full of tears.

"Fabian tried to kill me when I was courting Molly," Arthur easily explained to Remus. "He was a little overprotective of his younger sister. Gideon just took me aside and threatened me with a fate worse then death if I ever hurt her."

"What's a fate worse then death?" Remus questioned.

"There was a black haired Hufflepuff that was chasing Arthur. Nasty girl, face like a horse, laughed like one also. Gideon desired to tell her about Arthur's secret crush on her." Molly explained.

"Arundel. Gideon Arundel. That way if any of us slip, we can claim Arthur was actually Arundel," Remus decided.

"Gideon Damien Brian Arundel," Arthur stated.

"Good name. Solid." Filius decided. "Now you two go."

Arthur rubbed his face, and made a disgusted face. "I'll have to get used to having a beard. I could never understand why Albus wore a rug on his face."

* * *

In fact, at that very moment, Severus Snape was debating the very same issue regarding Al. 

The morning sickness had begun, which seemed rather strange to Severus as Al wasn't that far along. But respect for traditional had never stopped Albus from doing whatever the hell he wanted, whenever he wanted, and so Al had power puked his brekkie besides power puking his chockies, and his beard was an absolute stinking mess.

"Nessie," Severus decided. "Al's beard has to go. Clean him up, get him changed, and then we're shaving off his beard."

"Master wanting Nessie to take it all off?" Nessie sadly questioned. "It's so soft and pretty."

"It's not pretty now, Nessie," Severus reminded her. "You don't need to completely shave him, but I think a neat, close trim might work better than the mess he has now. After his morning sickness has passed, I'll do a quick growth spell for his beard."

"Master is so smart!" Nessie gleefully announced. "Master is so kind and handsome. Master is so gentle with Al. Master's baby is lucky to have him!"

The House Elf stared at him with such hopeless adoration in her eyes that Severus felt quite ill. What in the name of Merlin's bloody left tit had the House Elf endured that she thought he was such a wonderful Master? After all, he was wanted for the murder of Albus Dumbledore, and knowing the Order, they'd kill him first and then debate the issue.

"Have some chockie," he finally stated. He gave her a piece that had been destined for Al's gastric delight until the vomiting had commenced. "I appreciate the fine job you've done with him. It's not been easy, but you've done exceedingly well."

Merlin's scrote was it really necessary for the House Elf to burst into tears and soak his knee?

* * *

Remus Lupin and his new friend Gideon Arundel stepped out of the fireplace and into the infirmary. To Arthur's horror, he was immediately greeted by the sight of Ginny, who was sitting on a bed, apparently waiting for Poppy's attention. She looked healthy, though her wan face appeared washed-out against her ginger hair. 

He tapped Remus to get his attention focused on his daughter and Remus nodded his head.

"Gideon? Would you mind waiting here? I see someone I know. Her father just died and I've been keeping an eye on her," Remus explained.

"Absolutely," Arthur replied.

Remus walked over to Ginny and sat down next to her. They held a quiet conference for a bit, and then Remus nodded his head. Ginny then gave the werewolf a fierce hug. Lupin seemed a little gobsmacked by either their chinwag or the hug, though he was mightily struggling to hide his astonishment.

"I will talk to you in about two hours," Remus promised. "Promise me that you won't do anything before then."

"No," Ginny promised.

"I'm really sorry that we can't chat now; I need to take my friend Gideon Arundel to see Poppy. It was a stroke of good luck that Minerva saw Gideon and his wife when she was out yesterday. They've been on the run for a while, and we can use their skills," Remus explained.

Arthur's heart broke when his daughter looked at him and there was no sign that she recognized him.

"Hello, miss," he whispered. "Not feeling poorly are you?"

"Just a checkup," Ginny easily explained before she turned toward Remus. "Thank you, Remus. With my dad not here, you're the only one that I thought I could actually talk to that might actually be helpful. Bill would freak, Charlie would think it's funny, Percy… oh Merlin's tit, Percy would be horrified and let's not discuss the advice that George and Fred would give me. Ron needs help himself, so I certainly couldn't ask him."

It was on the tip of Arthur's tongue to chastise Ginny for her language, but he knew he couldn't protest her language. Who did this Gideon fellow think he was? Her father?

"I'm quite honored that you trust me," Remus assured her. "Now, I'll see you in two hours in my quarters? Sirius and Dora shouldn't be there. If they are there, I'll kick them out. Sirius would be most unhelpful, and well, Dora would only be slightly less."

Ginny blushed and thanked him once more.

"See you then," Remus promised. Ginny hugged him once more and the werewolf managed to barely escape from her clutches before Poppy descended upon them.

"Remus? Who is your friend?" Poppy questioned.

"Minerva brought him in yesterday. Gideon Arundel is his name. He and his wife need to be checked over when you have time. Is Minerva up to having visitors?" Remus questioned.

Poppy gave him the once over, and there was no doubt that she recognized him as a Transformed Arthur. With a curt nod of her head, she gave approval for the two men to visit Minerva.

"As long as you keep things quiet," Poppy assured him. "Why don't you bang on the old harridan's door and announce that you're popping in. Some visitors might do her good."

"She's being difficult?" Remus laughingly asked.

"Difficult isn't the word. I may ask Hagrid to physically restrain her to the bed so she can't leave," Poppy snapped.

"Very well, Gideon? Shall we face the lioness in her den?"

"Looking forward to it," Arthur lied.

The two men walked away from Ginny's bedside, and before long, curtains were drawn around the bed. Remus walked for a few meters, and then he pulled Arthur into an empty cubicle.

"Arthur, don't worry, Ginny is just fine. But I need your help. Ginny wants to have a serious conversation about… sex," Remus turned pale after he admitted that to Ginny's father.

It was obvious that the werewolf was prepared for Arthur to belt him. Instead, Arthur laughed.

"Remus, you have a fine son, I'm sure you know where all the parts go," Arthur retorted. "If you're not sure, Ginny can tell you. She and I had a very open relationship. She would come to me regarding all her questions as I was calmer than Molly regarding these issues."

It was obvious to Arthur that Remus couldn't understand how the woman that exemplified the Mother Goddess of the Order could be uptight about sex.

"She's overprotective because of her brothers dying so young," Arthur explained. "Now, I'm rather surprised that Ginny is asking you any questions, as I thoroughly explained everything to her years ago. We discussed this very matter this past summer. I even taught her all the known contraceptive spells, including the morning after ones, before she first left for Hogwarts. Remus, stop looking like that! For the love of all that's magical, Lupin, my wife and I do use contraceptive spells… else there would be quite a few more ginger haired boys running around."

His face fell as he whispered, "I use them regularly unless I'm being compelled…"

Remus quickly changed the conversation from unhappy things to the subject at hand. "It's Harry. You know that they're engaged, and you might not be aware that they had decided to wait until the wedding night. Now, she's feeling a little lost and she's debating about not waiting. She was asking me how she'd know if she was really ready for such a big step."

Arthur paused, and he thought about the matter. Then he carefully weighed his words before he spoke, "Remus, I thoroughly approve of Harry. He was a fine boy that's grown into a remarkable young man. Molly and I love him just as much as if he was our own son. He treats Ginny well, and I'm delighted that he'll be part of my family. If it helps you at all, remind her that it's a big commitment, and that it's a wonderful way of expressing love between two, or in your case, three people. Just please go over all the contraceptive spells with her, please. I'm not ready to be a grandfather. Also don't tell Molly about your conversation with Ginny, as she'll fret."

Remus' smile returned after Arthur finished.

"That's exactly what I needed to hear," Remus admitted. "I'm glad I don't have to look forward to talking to Teddy about this stuff just yet. Though I think Dora better give him The Talk. I barely understand Metamorphmagus sex even though I am more than a willing participant."

They stood next to the private room where Minerva was resting, and Lupin knocked. There was a rather obscene comment that caused Remus some concern, but Arthur opened the door.

"Best you go in first, Remus. Else she might blow me up first, ask questions later," Arthur declared.

* * *

Minerva took a long appraising look at the new features of Arthur Weasley. She made him turn this way and that, stand up and sit down. Her curiosity not quenched, she also requested that he walk and talk to see how much of Arthur's mannerisms remained in Gideon. It was only after she asked him to juggle for her, did the two men realize that she was being bit of a daft prat. 

"Filius does nice work," she admitted, ignoring Arthur's strangled protestations that he wasn't a raree show. "He'll also ensure that you will be unable to admit to your family who you really are. I am truly sorry, Arthur. I can't risk losing Severus if anyone discovers that you're both alive. He might be the only way we can actually still win this war."

"I know," Arthur slowly agreed. "I saw Ginny outside, and it really tore my heart apart that I couldn't acknowledge her."

"I'm really sorry," Minerva repeated. Her green eyes filled with tears, and Remus offered her a handkerchief. "Bullocks! I'm weeping like a crazy bint."

"No, Min, it's just reassuring proof that you're all soft and squishy underneath your rock hard exterior," Remus quipped.

"Don't ever make fun of a woman's wrinkles. Not if you want to live until morning. I earned every single one of them after dealing with you and your friends," snapped Minerva.

Poppy then popped into the room, and she was about to speak when she stopped. There was a perplexed look on her face.

"Cat got your tongue?" Remus joshed, ignoring Minerva's stern look. The animagus hated cat jokes as she had heard all 2,342 of the clean ones at least six times and far too many of the risqué ones in her lifetime.

"It's the painting. Remember how you told me to let you know if there were any changes? You specifically didn't care if Albus cut his hair, but you were wondering if he has a chin underneath his rug?"

"Yes," Minerva said.

"He's got quite the chin dimple, it appears," Poppy slowly admitted. "It also appears that he's no longer wears a full beard. Albus has gotten quite the trim."

Minerva grabbed Arthur's arm for support so she could look at the painting, and when he failed to move fast enough for her liking, she physically pulled him along.

"What are you talking about?" Arthur questioned.

"The painting of Albus was moved to this room, so he could 'rest'," Minerva explained as she peered at the sleeping Albus. "During the last few days, there have been changes to the portrait. Mainly cosmetic changes to his hair and his clothes. Bloody hell…. Albus does have a chin!"

Minerva's shock over the fact that Albus did possess a chin was so great that she swayed on her feet. Least that was her explanation for her weakness, which Poppy immediately dismissed as poppycock.

"Back in bed, Min!" Poppy ordered. "When she's safe in bed, both of you two leave. Gideon, I'll have to check you later, I'm afraid. Miss McGonagall needs a thorough going over."

* * *

Molly regretfully agreed to wait until Arthur was thoroughly checked before proceeding with her own Transformation. She also declared that it was for the best as she was rather tired and wished to nap. Then Molly heartily urged Arthur to get some exercise by walking through Hogwarts. When Filius agreed that it was permissible for Arthur to do so, Arthur reluctantly agreed. It wasn't that he wanted to leave Molly, but he had enough personal experience to know that when Molly was carrying, sometimes the best thing for him to do was leave her alone. Else he'd be the victim of the hexes that were both unusual and highly appropriate according to Molly. 

He didn't want to go too far, and he remembered a hiding place that Molly and he had discovered when Apollyon Pringle had been close to finding them out of bed one late night. It would do.

* * *

The talk with Remus had been rather embarrassing, Ginny Weasley had to admit. 

For one thing, she didn't believe that a man old enough to be her father could be shocked by anything. Then Sirius had decided to sit in, purportedly to give Remus moral support in the discussion, but it quickly became apparent to Ginny that both men were mere babes with regards to women. It was amazing that both men could be traumatized by such innocent questions regarding sexual techniques that they liked. If she decided to make love with Harry, she really wanted not to be a fumbling idiot. Yes, maybe she could have asked Dora, but she had often found better luck asking her father these type questions rather than her mum. and so she had approached Remus.

Ginevra Weasley was a tough soul, as the result of being the little sister of Fred and George Weasley, but she still desired to be a decent lover. All those Muggle magazines she had secretly read while she was at Hogwarts, with their impossible sexual positions had quite damaged her sexual confidence. What if Harry had read something similar in those magazines that her brothers had always kept hidden from their mum? She knew that Fred and George had ensured that Harry had gotten a proper introduction to their secret sex stash during Harry's visits to the Burrow. How horrible would it be to be dead-in-bed!

How she missed her father! She could talk to her father about everything. Maybe not his preferred sexual techniques, but he'd look at her and know what she wanted to ask. Then he'd gently answer her questions in a way that eased her concerns that she had never voiced.

She decided that she just needed to be alone, in order to have a good cry. After her parents' deaths, Ginny had needed to be strong and brave, and so she had suppressed her emotions.. Bill had enough problems keeping their family's grief under control, and she hadn't felt easy burdening Harry with her issues. He had taken Dumbledore's death hard especially when he realized that Dumbledore had agreed to the parlay only because Dumbledore had believed that Voldemort was holding Harry captive.

There was a spot, a secret spot that her father had mentioned to her. It was on the sixth floor, and it would be perfect for a good crying jag.

Sneaking into the spot, she was disappointed to discover that it was already occupied by Remus' friend Gideon Arundel. He was staring out the window, lost in thought and then he noticed her.

"Oh, I'm sorry, miss… Virginia?" His voice was deep, but there was something familiar and comforting in its cadence. "Do you want to stay here for a bit? I'll leave, as you look like you're in need of some privacy."

"Ginny," she quickly explained, as she was often asked that question. "Short for Ginerva. It's Italian for Guinevere. My dad loved telling me about King Arthur's court."

That admitted, Ginny burst in sobs. To her complete surprise, Gideon reached out to her, and gave her a hug. The uneasy sense of familiarity increased when Gideon gently rubbed her back and urged her to weep.

"You need to let it out, Miss Ginny," he informed her. "Don't let your grief fester."

And Ginny Weasley cried still harder.


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer #1 - Not my Characters.

Disclaimer # 2 - AU, Dark Fic, pregnancy, Mpreg.

* * *

When Ginny stopped crying, Gideon Arundel, once known in another life as Arthur Weasley, tentatively patted her on her back, and then searched his pockets. He pulled out a white handkerchief, inspected it closely and then handed it to her. 

"It's clean," Gideon assured her.

She nodded her head, and roughly blotted her teary eyes.

"What's the matter, miss?" Gideon questioned, attempting not to act like Arthur Weasley, which was damn near impossible when faced with his sobbing daughter. "You don't need to tell me, but I'm just wondering why you're crying. Do you want me to find someone? Should I get Remus?"

"I miss my parents. They died," Ginny softly explained, in between her sniffs. "They were caught by Voldemort's forces and they were killed."

"You're quite the brave lass to say that name," Gideon admitted. "Not many can say that name."

"Harry can, and I need to be as strong as he is," she explained.

"Harry is your…. ?" Gideon asked.

"Fiancé. We were to be married in a few months." With that admission, Ginny began weeping still harder in Gideon's soggy handkerchief.

"You're not engaged any longer? Shall I knock some sense into the cad's head for you?" Arthur questioned.

Ginny stopped sobbing then, and blew her nose with a distinctively unladylike honk.

"Thank you for you offer but I have an entire arsenal of brothers that would beat him up if he decided to cancel the engagement. I'm just not sure about getting married… what with my parents not being here. It just won't be the same without my Dad… and my Mum… but I wanted my Dad to walk me down the aisle."

"He'll be there in spirit," Gideon informed her. "So leave the back row clear for your ghostly guests. If your parents show up, they might bring a few more of your relatives with you."

"I know. Sometimes, I think they're still around… but it's just not enough. I wish they were here… especially my Dad. My Mum gets… got excited… she was overprotective of all of us kids. You can't blame her because her brothers died in the previous war, but my Dad… I could talk to my Dad. I really need to speak to him now, and there's nobody here to whom I can actually talk. I tried talking to Remus, but while your friend is great on Defense against the Dark Arts, he's rather cack-handeded when it comes to the emotional stuff."

"Most men are," Arthur sagely stated. "We're just good at the carrying heavy objects."

His self-deprecating comment caused Ginny to laugh.

"Not my Dad. He'd talk to me, and he was good with that stuff."

"Then why don't you talk to him? Pretend that I'm him, and just talk. Then if you're really still, you might hear him from beyond the Veil, offering suggestions. I don't know you; don't know this Larry fellow…"

"Harry," Ginny inserted, her tone quite displeased that he didn't know who Harry was.

"Like I was saying, I'm nobody. I don't know you or your Harry, so go ahead, vent."

So Ginny took a deep breath, and she began to voice her concerns. Ginny talked to her Dad about being nervous about getting married, how much she missed her Mum and Dad and how worried she was regarding her wedding night because she was inexperienced in such matters.

After that last comment, Ginny flushed, and apologized. "I'm truly sorry. That just slipped out. I could talk to my Dad about such things. Not Mum, as she'd have spell locked me into a Muggle nunnery. Considering she and Dad eloped, her attitude is rather funny."

"Don't apologize; you needed to let that out. Now, let's be quiet for a few minutes and see if your Dad responds. You need to be very, very still. Spirits are usually extraordinarily quiet, and they speak to your heart," Gideon explained. "Not to your ears."

"I've never heard _**that**_ in Divination," Ginny protested. "Then again my instructor was usually quite potted."

Gideon put one finger against his lips, and quietly warned her to stop being such a cheeky monkey.

They sat in companionable silence, safe in their hiding spot, for some time, and then Ginny shook her head.

"I didn't hear him," she sadly admitted. "Though I really didn't expect it."

"Funny, I did," Gideon assured her. "He spoke rather clearly to me, possibly because I'm an old married man with kids or possibly because your disbelief made it hard for him to talk to you. Your father said… Ginerva, you know your mother and I love Harry like he was one of our own. He's grown into a fine young man, worthy of you. And you are quite worthy of him. You'll be a fine match."

His words seemed to calm her, and she smiled for the first time since she had stumbled upon him.

"And…." Gideon attempted to look embarrassed. "Regarding the other issue… he wanted to remind you that physical love is a wonderful experience. It can bring two people closer together as it's an act of love. Don't be worried about your supposed inexperience, the important issue is that you both love one another. It's a lovely privilege that you've given him, Ginerva, and I'm sure that he'll cognizant of the honor. He'll treat you with the reverence and love that you so richly deserved."

That caused Ginny's smile to widen, and Gideon decided to add, "Your mother said to make sure that you save the back row for them. Something about… bringing his parents?"

Ginny's face whitened, and she burst into tears once more. Once again, he found himself with Ginny in his arms, and he was timidly consoling his daughter when they were interrupted.

"Ginny? I've been looking all over for you," said a young male voice. "Why have you been hiding here? Oi! What's this?"

Harry Potter stopped talking, and he bequeathed a doubtful look on the older, bearded man that was hugging his sobbing fiancée. Any other time, Arthur would have been delighted to see that Harry's hand was instinctively reaching for his wand, but not then, as he was the intended target.

"This is Gideon Arundel," Ginny explained as she broke away from him. "I just needed a few minutes to myself, and I'm afraid he heard me sobbing. He was quite sweet, offered me his handkerchief."

She looked at it, and then gave him a rather embarrassed smile.

"It's quite damp, and I'll clean it," she promised.

"Don't worry, I've got plenty. Now, if you don't mind, I really need to be getting back to my wife," Gideon stated, as he attempted to quickly extricate himself from the situation.

"Gideon, this is my finance, Harry," Ginny explained. "Gideon is a friend of Remus. Minerva found him and his wife yesterday and brought them here. They were on the run from Voldemort."

The two men shook hands, each giving the other the once over. Then to Arthur's surprise, Ginny gave Gideon a peck on his cheek.

"Thank you," she whispered.

"Now, now, miss. You shouldn't be kissing an old married man like me, not in front of your fiancé." Gideon gently protested. "I need to get back to my wife. I'll see you around. Nice meeting you, Harry."

Arthur left then, as his talk with Ginny had helped ease his soul, and he needed to make amends to Molly. As he expected, Molly was waiting for him when he returned, her face calm, but her eyes were sad. How could he have not seen how much pain he was causing her?

"Oh Molly," he whispered. "I've been such a bloody fool. I'm so sorry that I gave you reasons to doubt me."

"No, you've been hurt, and you needed to heal," she protested.

Carefully, he pulled her towards him, and he softly kissed her on her lips. When they broke apart, Molly was hopefully gazing up at him.

"I want to have my wicked, wicked way with you," he whispered in a suggestive tone. "I've missed you, so much. I've so longed to make love with my Mollywobbles. But…"

"Arthur, if you continue to talk, I'm going to get quite vexed," Molly sternly interjected.

So, Arthur carefully and lovingly picked up his wife, and carried her to their bed. Molly was both giggling at his foolishness and protesting that he'd injure his back. Gently, he placed her on their bed, making sure she was comfortable, and then Arthur Weasley began to kiss his wife.

"I hope that they knock before they show up," he whispered. "Else they might get quite the peep show!"

* * *

A freshly shaved Al was sitting between Good Not Good Sev and Good Nes on the couch. Good Not Good Sev was holding a piece of paper in his hand, and the dark haired man was rubbing his head as though it hurt, and Al thought that quite appropriate. 

Carefully, he mouthed the word Bay Bee. It was a difficult word, as he couldn't quite get the sound right. Nor did he understand what it meant, thought it was apparently a very important word as both Good Not Good Sev and Good Nes used the term regularly. Good Nes then popped a sweet in his mouth, and she chattered a bit. All thoughts regarding the difficult word Bay Bee left his mind as he sucked on the tart candy. Abstract thoughts were hard enough for Al to consider, and they were no comparison to enjoying a sweet.

"You shouldn't feed him so many sweets. He'll have sugar problems!" Good Not Good Sev protested.

"Nessie sorry! Nessie thought Al had bad taste in his mouth!" Good Nes explained.

"We have a problem, Nessie. I have been invited to dinner with the Malfoys, and I'm requested to bring Al," Good Not Good Sev growled. "You'll need to get him properly attired."

"Nessie can use hair ribbons in Al's pretty hair?" Good Nes hopefully asked.

Good Not Good Sev stared at Al, and Al nearly swallowed his sweet as he was scared of Good Not Good Sev's appraising look. Not Goods and HER had looked at him like that, and then there had been pain, a horrific searing pain in his belly. He began to gag on his sweet.

"**_Anapneo!_**" Good Not Good Sev cast, and to Al's regret, the tart sweet popped out of his mouth, and it disappeared in mid-air.

"Put him to bed, Nessie. We need to talk," Good Not Good Sev announced, and then Al was trundled off to bed.

"Nessie comes back later to reads you a story," Good Nes promised as she tucked Al into bed. "Now sleep, Al. Baby needs you to sleep."

To Al's delight, Nes slipped him another tart sweet. This time, Al vowed, he wouldn't let Good Not Good Sev know. So he put it under his tongue and let it dissolve.

* * *

Severus stared at the ornate invitation, and growled. Trust Cissy to decide to throw a small intimate dinner party for fifty of so of her closest friends, their spouses and their children! The social season must continue unabated at the Malfoy manor, despite the widespread civil unrest, raping, pillaging and murdering. The absolute kicker was her handwritten note that he was to bring Al as they'd '_love to see him_'. 

It was another test, Severus knew. So therefore, regretfully, he decided that it was necessary to subject Al to intense humiliation.

_**Head Master, forgive me.**_

By the time Nessie returned to the room, Severus had painfully concluded that he was in dangerous territory. He was walking on thin ice, fearful of one single misstep that would sent him into the dark, icy waters when the fragile ice broke beneath him. Merlin's scrote, he was dependent on a House Elf!

"Nessie, you care for Al do you not?" Severus softly questioned.

"Nessie loves Al and the baby," Nessie quickly assured him. When she opened her mouth to assure him that Nessie loved her Master also, but Severus interrupted her before she could begin her spiel. He had heard it numerous times, and each time, her pitiful protestations about what a wonderful Master he was, made him almost physically ill.

"Yes, I know you're loyal to me, but Nessie, I want you to get my black scarf from the closet, and you're to hide it in your bed."

"No," Nessie began whimpering, and her face was stricken. "Kind Master not gives Nessie _**clothes**_!"

"Nessie will get clothes if she doesn't cease her caterwauling. In fact, she'll get a polka dotted dress if she doesn't stop shrieking," snapped Snape. "I'm asking for you to hide it in your bed, I am not giving it to you. Now do as I command, Nessie!"

Immediately, he felt guilty as Nessie began sniffling quietly, her two different sized ears quivering as she tried to control her sobs. Neither for the first nor the last time, he wished he had enough talent in the healing arts to fix her badly damaged ear.

She did as instructed, and then she returned to him. Her movements were hesitant as though the House Elf was fearful of furthering upsetting her Master.

"It's very dangerous times, Nessie. I need to know, are you completely loyal to me?" Severus softly questioned. "Will this conversation only stay between you and your Master? Promise me, Nessie."

Nessie nodded her head repeatedly, and crossed her heart.

"These are very dangerous people that surround me, as you are very well aware," Severus continued. "Treacherous and highly ambitious souls that might decide it would greatly improve their position if they eliminated me."

He was rewarded for his dramatic speech by a muted wail of terror from Nessie. She put both her hands in her mouth to muffle her shriek.

"If I am seriously injured or dead, I hereby give you my black scarf. I…" He paused, debated what word to use, and decided that he was turning into a sentimental fool. "As I worry… what will happen to my Nessie if that happens. I want you to be a Free House Elf, free from the abuse you've suffered at the hands of your previous mistress but I request two boons from you."

She was staring at him, her big brown eyes full of tears, and Severus damned himself for not having a silver tongue.

"You will take of my child, Nessie. You will do so as a Free Elf," Severus ordered. "But most importantly, if anything happens to me and I am unable to protect you two, you are to get Al and the child out of his cesspool of maggots. It is very important to me that Al and the baby are protected. You are to locate a witch by the name of Minerva McGonagall and bring Al and the baby to her. She'll direct you to the family who has agreed to raise my child. They will need your help as they will have their own little one to raise. I can assure you that they will not beat you or harm you. Do you agree?"

She nodded her head, and he sighed.

"Because you are a Free Elf, I'll ensure that you will be paid a stipend."

"No! Master, no pays Nessie! Nessie will do it for free!" Nessie pleaded. "Do not shame Nessie so!"

"Master insists that you will get paid and that you will be happy about it," he growled.

That argument shut down Nessie, and she nodded her head but she still looked betrayed.

"Nessie will miss her kind Master," she sadly whispered. "Master is so nice to Nessie!"

"I'm not dead yet," he hissed, trying not to show that her concern had touched him. "What do you need to do to bond with the baby?"

"Nessie just needs to sit next to Al!" She cheerfully explained. "I hears the baby's heartbeat and then I bonds with it."

No doubt there was more to the strange House Elf ritual involved with bonding a child then what Nessie was willing to reveal, but it appeared no chickens would need to be slaughtered nor blood let. Well, whatever mess Nessie made, she'd be responsible for cleaning up.

"Do it as soon as possible. It is exceedingly important that the child is protected." Severus ordered. "Now regarding this party, I need you to dress Al. He is to be dressed in a silver and emerald green robe, and that includes matching hair ribbons. I need him ready by four this afternoon."

"Nessie wonders would Master like Al to wear a hat?" Nessie questioned.

"Yes, a tassled hat would be the absolute pièce de résistance," Severus regretfully agreed. "You're to come with me to the party, and ensure that Al doesn't get into any trouble. You're to feed him, keep him clean and keep him safe. It is imperative that you keep Al safe. Agreed?"

She nodded her head eagerly.

"Nessie go bond with the baby!" Nessie happily exclaimed as she toddled off to the bedroom. There was a jaunty bounce to her step that rather irked a stressed Severus. "Then Nessie dresses Al prettily!"

_I'm her Master, she should care more about me then the tadpole!_

He read for a bit, and then his curiosity got the better of him. After all, he was the father of the tadpole; he really should take a more active interest in the highly regarded Ritual of Bonding of Master's Baby by the House Elf.

Severus got as far as the bedroom door, and he looked into the room. Nessie was cuddled next to the recumbent Al, and her good ear was propped against Al's stomach. Her eyes were closed, and Nessie was humming softly. There was a look of pure bliss on her face and she was rubbing his stomach in gentle circles. To Severus' surprise, the Al that was awake and staring in fascination at the purring House Elf was a pale facsimile of the Head Master investigating an unusual situation. There was… something… in his blue eyes… a puzzled interest that was far different than the accustomed vacancy in his eyes.

"Head Master?" Severus whispered, but he received no response. As he watched, Al closed his eyes, and began to doze, his slight snores providing an interesting counterpoint to the melody of Nessie's humming.

Instead, he heard Cissy's warning to him regarding Al.

_I warn you to be wary of your new bed toy, Severus. Unlike others that we know, I do not believe that he was so effortlessly crushed…. There's something in his eyes that night… that still frightens me. I believe that behind his eyes, there is a smoldering fury that is utterly unrestrained by intelligence."_


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer #1 - Not my Characters.

Disclaimer # 2 - AU, Dark Fic, pregnancy, Mpreg.

A/N – Thanks to Linze for her suggestions.

* * *

Nessie had truly outdone herself. 

At three in the afternoon, Al was duly presented for his inspection.

The Head Master's long hair was neatly twisted into a multitude of tiny, intricate silver and emerald green color plaits. The mass of braids was neatly constrained by a silver ring. His beard was only a shadow of its former glory, as it was closely cropped to his jaw line, but it was Al's clothes which he couldn't help but stare at. Merlin protect his sanity, Al was the picture perfect example of Slytherin pride.

Nessie had decided to go for a more modern look than the traditional dress robes, and had managed to clothe Al in a long black frock coat with matching trousers. To complete the outfit, he wore a short waistcoat with silver buttons and bow tie. Both were Slytherin green with silver embroidered snakes and on Al's head, there was a matching cap complete with tassel.

Al was even wore his half moon spectacles, as if the House Elf had naively hoped that her friend would be able to better function in public by wearing them. For a moment, Severus thought he saw a twinkle in Al's eyes, as though the Head Master was secretly amused by his Slytherin colored accessories, but Severus knew that he was mistaken. The Head Master's mind had long since done a bunk.

Somehow, Nessie had even managed to get one of the Head Master's rings onto one of his badly misshapen fingers. The Head Master's hands were better than the deformed claws they had once been thanks to Nessie's intensive efforts at rehabilitation, but they were still horribly twisted.

Nessie stared up at Severus, her apprehension over his reaction obvious. Her huge bat like ears were at mid-staff, apparently extremely uncertain over her Master's less than chuffed reaction.

"Nessie hopes that kind Master likes?" She hopefully prompted. "Nessie saw something similar in one of her old Mistress' fashion magazines?"

It took a while for Severus to respond due to the painful lump in his throat.

_I've turned the most powerful wizard in all the British Isles into a Merlin-blasted raree show exhibit!_

"Yes, I approve," he finally stated. "Nessie has done exceedingly well. I am quite… pleased."

The House Elf failed to hear his discomfort, as she began to purr happily. Her two dissimilar-sized ears rapidly quirked back into the position that he had rapidly come to realize that meant Nessie was content with her world.

"Master is so handsome in his long back coat, Nessie thought Al would look nice if they matched," she happily explained. "Now don't spill anything, Al!"

The House Elf beamed happily at her lack witted friend, and Severus intently stared at the two of them. Yes, it had been a good idea, that had gotten much better the longer he pondered upon it. If Nessie attended… perhaps… as a type of man servant… someone could keep an eye on Al. Keep him out of trouble… or more importantly get him out of there in case trouble arose.

"Nessie, perhaps it might be a good idea if you attend this party with Al and myself," Severus quickly decided. "I want you to understand that what I am about to propose is a uniform for this evening, nothing more. I am not giving you clothes, Nessie, but perhaps, we could magic up something similar to what you wear now, but in black."

Nessie's ears were quivering in their excitement, and then Severus decided to be magnanimous. He was Lord and Master, the Father Figure of the "Putting the Fun in Dysfunctional" Snape Family after all, and it was his right to overindulge his family members, especially since Nessie endeavored so hard to earn Daddy's approval.

"Perhaps a touch of green and silver embroidery might not be amiss. Something understated and classy." He added.

* * *

"Poppy?" Minerva questioned, her voice uncharacteristically weak. 

"Yes?" The Mediwitch answered in a tone that could only be described as long suffering.

"I'd like to go back to my quarters now. I know you won't believe that I'll rest there, but I simply can not be in this room for a moment longer," the witch pleaded in a very subdued tone. "I swear on the graves of the Founders of Hogwarts, well, on three of the graves at least, that I will go to my quarters and rest. I will let Filius and Remus run the rebellion for the next two days. I swear on Godric Gryffindor's sword that I will stay in my bed and rest if you just let me leave."

Poppy glared at Minerva, her mind working beneath her frustrated façade, and then Minerva lifted a trembling arm to gesture at the portrait of Albus.

"If I have to stay in this room, staring at that portrait for a moment longer, I will go absolutely astray in my head, Poppy!" It was a fervent exclamation, not merely one born of frustration or anger.

Still, Poppy couldn't help but snort at her long time friend's exasperation. Minerva McGonagall was a horrible patient, and it was simply amazing to Poppy that she had managed to keep Minerva tied to her bed for almost a full day after her collapse.

"He's changed his clothes, Poppy," the other witch continued. "Now Albus looks like he's attending a black robe party, and he's adorned in Slytherin colors. I'm cracking up, Poppy, really I am – I mean it looks to me as though the House Elf doll with that obscene ear to ear smile is now wearing something _**similar**_. For some unknown reason, Poppy, that House Elf doll is now wearing a black outfit with silver and green embroidery, Poppy!"

Poppy turned to face the portrait, and she nodded once.

"Albus could be a cover for Wizard's Quarterly," Poppy admitted. "Though his hair is a tad flamboyant, Minerva. Dreadlocks?"

"Please, Poppy, let me out of this room," Minerva begged. "I will swear on Godric Gryffindor's sword that I will behave!"

A sniff of disbelief was Poppy's only reaction to Minerva's heartfelt plea.

"Please?" The Leader of the Resistance's voice was most assuredly insistent.

"Maybe I'll have someone watch you to ensure that you behave," Poppy decided.

Minerva's relief at escaping from the House Elf doll was obvious, but Poppy also knew that Minerva hadn't sworn on Godric's sword just yet, and that the witch was attempting to find a way to weasel out of her promise to behave.

"Gideon's wife Muriel has volunteered to keep an eye on you," Poppy said as she smoothly added that little tidbit and then twisted Godric's sword.

"_**MOLLY**_?" Minerva gasped. It was obvious to Poppy that Minerva knew that there was no way she'd be able to misbehave with Molly Weasley overseeing her care.

"Yes, she's agreed to keep an eye on you. Make sure that you behave," Poppy admitted. "Do you want to get changed? I'll Floo call the Arundels and ask them if they're still willing to watch you. Else you could stay here for another day or so."

"I'm getting dressed!" Minerva quickly exclaimed.

* * *

Severus had repeatedly reviewed the plans for the evening with Nessie, and she, in her eagerness to be loved, had immediately memorized them. That hadn't reassured him, so he had kept questioning her, and Nessie had glibly responded. 

"You're to protect him at all costs," Severus reminded her. "Now, Nessie, you've got the sweets to bribe him into being tractable and docile?"

"Nessie have six different types of sweets!" Nessie assured him. "Nessie have sherbet lemons, chockies…"

On his ever expanding mental list of things to do to assure a Healthy Tadpole, he noted that on the next visit with Gaeta, he'd demand a sugar test.

_Eight more months, and then a whole new list of worries! I'll need to figure out how to feed the Tadpole!_

That done, he decided it was time to head to the festivities.

"Very well, let's hold hands," he ordered. "Don't want to get lost."

Naturally, Al didn't understand, so Severus grabbed Al's wrist. Nessie already had a death grip with both of her hands on Al's other hand.

It was obvious whom the house elf preferred in their little family, and Severus mentally growled his disgust.

"Don't panic," he told Al.

Then with a pop, the Snape family disappeared.

* * *

Al was being squeezed in a Not Good way. He was screaming inside his head when abruptly the squeezing stopped, and he landed in a strange place. 

"Bloody hell," Good Not Good Sev growled. "Naturally, we can't arrive inside the house. No, we have to walk up to the Malfoy Manor. Very well then, come along. Watch out for the albino peacocks, they're dangerously inbred, and have a distressing tendency to attack visitors, Nessie."

Good Nes grabbed his hand, and started pulling him after Good Not Good Sev, ignoring Al's best attempts to stay exactly where he was.

His extreme reluctance soon drew Good Not Good Sev's ire.

"Move along, Al," Good Not Good Sev curtly ordered. "Sooner in, the sooner we can make our excuses and leave."

The unholiest of trios walked through the grounds for a bit, and Al found himself distracted by the blooming flowers. All of them… white… why did he remember similar flowers with far more vibrant colors?

"Nessie, please keep him away from the fountain," Good Not Good Sev ordered. "No doubt it's well stocked with hungry albino piranhas."

Good Nes squeaked in fear, and Al mentally growled. He didn't understand what was said, but Good Not Good Sev shouldn't scare Good Nes like that. It wasn't right!

They continued walking for a bit, and then Good Not Good Sev stopped them.

"Very well, are we all presentable?" Sev questioned.

Good Nes assured him that everything was fine, as it was obvious Al wouldn't be answering his question.

Then Good Not Good Sev put his hand on Al's cheek, and then stared into his eyes.

_**Stay calm. You're safe. Nessie will keep you safe. I will keep you safe. Stay calm. **_

Good Not Good Sev's voice was in his head. Al couldn't understand what the other man was saying, but there was a warm feeling… a sensation…like when he was drifting off to sleep, and it was just a purring Nes and him in the bed. He liked it when Nes purred even though the sound made his tummy all wiggly-jiggly inside.

The feeling… whatever it was … soon passed, and then the three of them walked into a large house.

* * *

"Severus, you came!" Cissy's voice carried down the hallway. "And you brought him!" 

Naturally, everyone turned to see who Severus had brought. There was an outburst of sound that greeted his arrive, gasps that Severus Snape was audacious enough to bring his war prize bride to the party, the hiss of those older male Death Eaters who were uneasy regarding Al's expectant condition and what it might mean for the looming power struggle among the various generations of Death Eaters, plus a few outraged shrieks from the purists who were horrified that Nessie was color coordinated with her Master and his concubine.

"I see he's wearing… emerald and silver, Severus. What a bold color combination," Lucius purred. "Are you making a… fashion… statement?"

Deliberately, Severus put his hand on Al's belly, much like a proud Papa.

"Yes, he's Slytherin now," Severus quipped. "By repeated injections."

As Severus expected, his ribald comment had everyone laughing. There were a few obscene comments shouted from the crowd, and Severus shook his head.

"Now, now, I don't need your rather quaint suggestions. After all those years of pretending to suck up to the daft, old codger, I'm delighted to report that now he's doing all the sucking…"

_Forgive me, Head Master, I bring you into this pit of vipers only because I must._

"Come along now, must not keep our host and hostess waiting," Severus commanded.

Cissy looked as though she was about to calve the latest Malfoy them and there on the carpet, though she assured him that she had two more months to go when he asked her due date.

"It wasn't necessary for you to bring your House Elf, Severus," Lucius snarked in his superior tone. "We have enough to serve, but one more might not be amiss."

"No, she's here to Albus-sit. I thought it prudent to have someone keeping an eye over him, especially since I know many of my fellow guests would be delighted to harm him, just for old times' sake. Plus, he's bit of a messy eater, as he's utterly forgotten how to use a knife and fork."

For good measure, he reached over to Al, and then brushed his lips against Al's cheek.

"My duffed up cabbage doesn't have to worry about anything as I'm here," he explained. "I'll ensure that he's fed and watered, and he won't be wearing any of it."

Al trembled after Severus kissed his cheek, which was the perfect reaction. Lucius noticed Al's apprehension, as did Cissy.

"Why don't you take him to the Music Room?" Cissy suggested. "We're having some predinner entertainment."

"Come along, cabbage," Severus brusquely ordered. "You used to enjoy music. Oh, I keep forgetting, you have forgotten that, didn't you?"

* * *

Bay bee. Those two Not Goods had used that strange term, as did Sev. The female had rubbed her burgeoning belly when she had said bay bee. Nes often touched his belly when she used those two words. Was bay bee something inside one's tummy? He pondered that strange thought intently, and he ignored the three talking. Then Sev brushed his cheek with his lips, and he was so startled that he trembled. 

Then Sev pulled- pushed him toward a room, and then he was forced to sit in a couch. Nes was standing next to him, holding onto his hand tightly. She was whispering something to him, as though attempting to reassure him.

He often wished he understood Nes. While Al could often guess her moods by how her ears were positioned, he thought that perhaps he should understand the sounds she made. Sometimes, he had dreams where he sat on a rock near the shoreline of a large body of water and he talked with a strange creature, a female that had a fish tail! Wonders of wonders, she had spoken to him, making the same strange noises that he did. And that thing was there, that scarlet and gold flyby that flew over his head and sang in a high pitched metal tone.

From what he could remember from his tattered memories, in the very beginning, long before Sev and Nes came into his awareness, he had been very afraid. There had been darkness, he remembered, and there had been that overwhelming fear. There had been moments where he had been so terrified that he desperately wished for peace and that everything would finally end; the darkness, the fear and the confusion. Then that flyby would blaze into his soul, fiery and bright and incandescent, singing cheerfully and bolstering his threadbare soul.

The bright thing never stayed for long, as though the bright flyby was fearful of being hurt by the Not Goods also. He hadn't seen it since meeting up with Sev and Nes, and he wondered if it was afraid of Sev.

"I'll get some food for us, Nessie. You keep an eye on him, don't let him do anything, keep him calm and sitting. No one can order you to do anything, Nessie, except for me, and of course, the Dark Lord, though I highly doubt he'll show up for this. You're to speak to no one except for Al and myself, unless they speak to you first, and no one is allowed to sit next to him, except for me."

Nes nodded her head, and when Sev had left the two of them, she carefully slipped a sweet into his hand.

"For Al," she whispered. "It's chockie!"

Carefully, he placed it in his mouth, deliberately placing it under his tongue, wanting to savor the taste. He closed his eyes, wanting to fully concentrate on the sweetness.

"Merlin's scrote," a female voice exclaimed. "You're bloody Alb…!"

Al opened his eyes to see a very surprised looking female staring at him. Since he hated being stared at, he decided to stare back at her, just to see if she liked it. Nes' ears were flat against her head, and her hands were claws, as though she was prepared to rip the woman apart on Sev's say-so. Nes was even…growling…

Sev's voice interrupted the female voice, "Yes, he's Al. Rita Skeeter, to what reason do I owe this truly unwanted pleasure?"

The blond woman looked uneasy, as though she feared Sev.

"Severus, darling, I had heard rumors that one of Britian's most eligible bachelor's wizards had been taken off the market. Naturally, I wanted to meet your… wife, Severus, the … woman… who had quite stolen your heart away from you. Maybe do a feature on her in the gossip section and find out how she thrilled she is to be expecting your baby. Our readers want to know all about the woman who's tamed the Dark Lord's right hand man."

"Now, Rita, you've met him," Sev snarked. "Feel free to ask him any questions you desire, I don't believe that he's capable of answering any of them. But that's never stopped you from obtaining your story before, now has it?"

"But he's…." Rita protested.

"A cabbage, my little duffed up cabbage, Rita. He has no mind left to him, so he doesn't remember meeting you, though, surprise, surprise, it appears that he still doesn't like you. Perhaps his dislike of you is instinctive, rather than learned behavior."

"But… he's…." Rita appeared unable to finish her thought.

"A male, but he's having our baby in eight months, so he's not showing just yet. Rita, you're being remarkably obtuse. I prefer _**men**_, Rita. I play for the other Quidditch team," Sev explained. "The Dark Lord gave me him for services rendered. He's my lover and the mother… incubator… of my child, Rita."

"But… but… he's obviously brain damaged!" Rita protested.

"Some things, such as sucking, are purely instinctive, Rita."

As always, Good Not Good Sev was making no sense to him, but Nes appeared somewhat calmer since Sev was handling the situation. To his surprise, Sev put something creamy on his finger, and then placed his finger into Al's mouth. Whatever was on his finger was Good, spicy and creamy, and Al sucked hard on Sev's finger, determine to lick every last bit off Sev's fingers.

Sadly, Sev took his finger out of Al's mouth, leaving a sad Al with only memories.

"That's… disgusting!" Rita's voice grew even shriller.

"Clean up the tawdry tidbits for your puritanical readers, Rita. But understand two things. His real name is not to be used, and the fact that he is male is not to be mentioned at all. If any of that happens, I will be displeased. _**You will not be likely to survive my displeasure**_," Sev promised.

Al didn't like Sev's tone, but it appeared to be directed towards the female. Perhaps, Sev was protecting him?

Sev then sat down next to Al, and he put something into Al's mouth. It was more of the tasty treat! Al was so intently concentrating on the taste that he didn't react when Sev put one arm around him, and then placed another one on his tummy.

"Don't forget to chew, Al. I've brought you all your favorites," Sev assured him. "Rita, if you don't mind, I need to feed Al. He's lost a great deal of weight before I acquired him, so I desire to plump him up. My little cabbage needs to eat for our baby's sake."

Again, Sev used those two words again, and Sev's hand was definitely on his belly.

It seemed that the bay bee was inside Al, but Al still didn't have any idea what it was, nor why his bay bee seemed much smaller than the Not Goods. But Sev was so intently feeding him that Al decided to worry about it for another day. In fact, if Sev continued feeding him like this, Al might decide to move him firmly into the Good category.

When the music started, Al was so startled that he nearly choked because he forgot to chew before he swallowed. It was his little flyby. It hadn't forgotten about him! His delight was mixed with fear, as he knew that the Not Goods would not be happy with the little flyby, because it was Bright and Good and it represented everything that the Not Goods would never be.

_No… no… go! They'll hurt you! _

* * *

Severus had just given Al a Belvior Crumpet on which to snack when Severus heard a scream. 

"It's a Phoenix! It's flying over the manor!"

Merlin's Scrote, the way Adelaide Higgins was overreacting, one would think that Salazar Slytherin had disinterred himself and popped in for drinks.

"Nessie, stay with Al," Severus crisply ordered. "Come now, come now, it's just a bird!"

Snapping at a few lack wits, he commanded that they follow him outside to deal with the bird. He did notice that everyone who hadn't been volunteered for the Phoenix Brigade was suspiciously staring at Al, who was merrily and mindlessly munching his way through a plate full of appetizers thanks to Nessie.

"It's merely a bird," he reminded the crowd when they appeared reluctant to leave the safety of the Music Room. "Are you cowards? Afraid of a _**bird**_?"

He managed to shame most of the crowd into following him outside, and he was greeted by the 'mere bird'. A bird that was in flames, and was merrily blazing its way through the large Dark Mark stationed over the Malfoy Manor.

Bloody hell, he had his doubts that it was a figment of Flitwick's wand, as it was flying far too quickly. Plus the bird was singing, loudly.

"Fawkes?" Severus whispered. It did his heart good to see that magnificent act of defiance.

One particularly feckless soul attempted to curse Fawkes, but succeeded only in damaging the slate roof of the manor house much to Lucius' consternation. It was simply amazing, Severus thought, that these bell-ends had somehow managed to defeat the Order of the Phoenix. Even that damn cur Black wouldn't have hit the roof!

"Do something, Severus!" Lucius screamed. "Before these cack-handed idiots destroy my home!"

"_Finite Incendio __Incantatem."_He enunciated the spell clearly, his voice audible over the general mayhem. Damn him for an utter fool, but Severus would swear to his dying day that Fawkes winked at him just before the Phoenix disappeared in a big poof of flame.

"Why did this happen?" Lucius arrogantly demanded. "Is it because of your new bed toy?"

"No," Severus disagreed. "Everyone and their mother knew you were throwing a party tonight. Rita Skeeter is even here, and the Resistance simply thought it would be a wonderful idea to have a Phoenix show up during drinks to embarrass the Dark Lord. It was a simple spell, Lucius, it wasn't Albus' familiar reborn, seeking vengeance."

For a moment, Lucius looked rather uncertain about his rationalization for the disruption, but Severus not-so-gently reminded him that oftentimes the simplest explanations were the most likely.

They were both staring at one another, when there was a burst of wild, wandless magic. Severus knew the taste of that magic, knew it intimately, and he began running toward the Music Room.

"What now?" Lucius growled.

"Wandless magic," Severus called, as he quickened his pace. "One of the children, no doubt. It needs to be handled carefully."

Actually the wielder of the uncontrolled magic was a hundred and twenty year old wizard whose mind had gone a bunk.

* * *

Nessie was carefully feeding Al like she had been instructed, ensuring that not so much as crumb fell on his nice clothes, when she was pushed away from him. The plate of appetizers went flying in the air, and she managed to prevent the pretty tray from breaking into a billion pieces. Carefully, she magicked the plate back to a table, and then she went back to Al. Hopefully, he hadn't spilled anything on his clothes as her kind Master would be displeased with her. Her Master had been so nice to her that she didn't want to risk angering him. 

There was a boy there and he must have been the one to push her away from her charge. The nasty boy was hurting Al! Al wasn't saying anything, but his face was scrunched up as though he was in pain.

"Not so tough now, are we?" The boy questioned. "Look at you, you were supposedly such a great and all powerful wizard, but now you need a House Elf to feed you."

"No! No touch Al! Nessie not allow!" Nessie protested. Deliberately, she placed herself between the two of them. Her former Mistress had commanded Nessie to never use magic against a human being, and her current Master had never rescinded that order, so Nessie was limited in what she could do.

"How sweet, Head Master, you've got a House Elf defending you," the boy spat.

"No! Nessie will not allow!"

The nasty, wicked boy hurt Nessie with his wand, and she screamed.

Then there was an explosion, and every glass in the room broke. The boy appeared alarmed, and Nessie made her decision. While she had been given orders to never harm a human being with magic, there was nothing said about her _**physically**_ harming a human. Therefore, Nessie decided that it was permissible for Nessie to sink her teeth into the fleshy part of his forearm.

She'd bite and she'd scratch to protect _**her**_ Al and _**her**_ baby. With a ferocious growl, Nessie the House Elf attacked.

* * *

There was utter chaos in the Music Room. Trenton Yaxley was screaming, and attempting to remove a rabid House Elf from his arm… 

Merlin's Scrote… that was _**his**_ House Elf biting Yaxley's spawn. Nessie was possessed, her mouth firmly on the boy's arm, and she was savagely clawing his face with her hands. Trenton kept screaming, and Al was trembling. A few wands were out, though no one was doing anything as they were fearful of hitting the boy.

"Nessie! I am ordering you to let go!" Severus loudly stated.

Nessie immediately released the boy, and the boy, feeling braver now that the isane House Elf's Master had returned, proceeded to kick Nessie. The kick landed hard on the House Elf who whimpered, and there was another explosive display of wandless magic as half the china exploded.

"You are not to touch my House Elf," Severus warned the bleeding boy. "Do so again, and you will not live to regret your folly. Nessie? Did the brat hurt you?"

"He tries to hurt Al. Nessie no let him do that. Nessie says for him to stop, but he dids it again, so Nessie bit him. No one hurts Al not while Nessie is here!" Nessie tearfully protested.

"That's a lie, she attacked me without any provocation," the boy protested.

There was another rattle from the few remaining pieces of intact china in the Music Room, and Severus growled.

"Settle down, boy. If you can't control your magic better at your age, your father should realize that you need remedial wand waving. Alas, poor Trenton, Filius Flitwick has been forced into permanent retirement and he'd probably have been the only one patient enough to deal with your cack-handed wand technique."

Trenton hissed, and Severus, having decades of experience of ignoring hormonal adolescent mages, looked around the room, inwardly delighting at the scared Death Eaters.

"Anyone care to confirm the boy's version of the story?" Severus questioned.

His fellow guests, deeply rattled by the events of the evening as their limited minds were unable to handle both a burning Phoenix and the exploding china, dared not volunteer their input.

"No, Master! Nasty boy lying!" Nessie tearfully protested. "Nessie protects Al like Nessie told to do by kind, handsome Master!"

"Nessie, I wish you to take Al home. You're to change him, feed and water him and then put him to bed." Carefully, he kept his tone neutral.

The dispirited House Elf nodded her head, knowing a dismissal when she heard one, and then she and Al disappeared with a loud crack.

"Trenton, why aren't you cleaning up the mess you helped to make?" Severus softly questioned.

"But I didn't make the mess!" The boy naturally protested.

"It was wandless, uncontrollable magic done by a human. In particular, a male practitioner of magic," Severus dryly explained in his best instructor's tone. "It was either you or Albus, and quite frankly, he chokes if he eats too fast, so I think this disaster is far beyond his capability."

The lack witted, cack handed boy was still staring at him, so Severus began cleaning up the mess that Al had made.

He was still cleaning up the chaos when both Cissy and Lucius, expressing sincere concern for Al's safety in the hands of his psychotically over protective House Elf, presented him with two large hampers full of the night's dinner, and suggested that he go home to check up on the incubator. Being a good host and hostess, they lifted the anti-Apparation charms from their mansion just long enough so he could immediately leave from the Music Room.

* * *

Nessie the House Elf helped change Al out of his nice party clothes and changed him for bed. That done, she gave him something nice for dinner and then put him into bed. She tried not to sob, but she knew that her Master would be home soon, and that he would be so vexed with her! Her kind Master had been so angry with her for biting that nasty boy. Nessie wasn't sure how exactly her Master would like to punish her, so she put the various instruments for punishing Bad House Elves out on the table. A hot iron, a cane and other devices would be waiting for him when he came home. 

Al seemed to sense her unhappiness, as he was very clingy, insisting that she stay with him. She decided that since she'd soon no longer be able to watch her beloved Al and her baby that she'd steal what precious moments she could. Crooning softly, she nestled her head against Al's tummy, resting her good ear on his belly. The wee baby's heart was rapidly beating, and she concentrated on the sound.

"Nessie loves Al," she whispered. "Al never hurts Nessie. Nessie will miss her Al so!"

That said, Nessie burst into tears, sobbing heartbroken tears, until she was uncontrollably hiccupping.

"Nessie loves Al's baby," she wept. "Nessie is such a bad elf that her Master will give her clothes!"

The despondent House Elf cried herself to sleep, and Al stared at her for a bit. Then making a decision, he covered the House Elf with his blanket, and cuddled close to her before he too, fell asleep.

* * *

Severus didn't go directly back to his quarters. Instead, he had Reduced the hampers into a pocket size version and he was now browsing through the few remaining magical bookstores. He was looking for a specific book, deliberately ignoring his fellow customers. Really, was it truly necessary to look that fearful when he walked past them? He was just browsing for a book, not planning on raping any nubile males that caught his eye. 

He was searching for a book that was in the Hogwarts Library Restricted Section, tripled protected against every spell that could possibly cause it to leave the safety of the Restricted Section and find its way into an unwary student's hand. It quickly became apparent to Severus that it was the only copy in existence.

Therefore, he'd have to ask Minerva if he could borrow it.

But how could he explain to Minerva that he wanted to see that particular Dark Arts book?

"Well, Minerva, I believe that Albus Dumbledore had modified the Horcrux spell and had forcibly separated his soul from his body. If we could somehow figure out where his soul might be, we could join it back to his body. I'm sorry, Min, didn't I tell you? I'm sorry; I've been so distracted lately. Albus is alive, and he's having our baby in eighth months."

If Minerva didn't kill him, he knew that a rational, no doubt a very much less than chuffed, up the duff Albus Dumbledore would.

It was bitterly ironic how doomed he was. The Dark Lord would kill him if he even suspected that Severus was undermining him, a sane Albus would also murder him when he realized what had been done to him, and it was extremely likely that Al's next burst of uncontrolled magic would kill him.

Just another dull day in the life of Severus T. Snape.


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer #1 - Not my Characters.

Disclaimer # 2 - AU, Dark Fic, pregnancy, Mpreg.

A/N # 1 – Thanks to Linze for her suggestions.

A/N # 2 – A little smidgeon of MM/FF.

* * *

Severus Snape decided it was long past time to go home to his little family. Let others cruelly mock his burgeoning affection for his little family, but the vacant headed Al and Nessie, his exceedingly overprotective House Elf were the closest he had ever experienced to having a real family. Yes, he would unwillingly admit that he was the physical spawn of an unfortunate coupling between Tobias Snape and Eileen Prince, but their emotional abuse and casual neglect had long since destroyed any warmth towards them he had once possessed. 

He vowed that he would take better care of HIS family than Tobias and Eileen had ever dreamed possible. They'd never want for anything… Severus nearly barked a harsh laugh when he realized how bloody trite that sounded. His duffed up cabbage would only care for the occasional sweet to cram into his mouth, and what the bloody hell would a House Elf desire anyway?

Unsuccessfully pondering that thought for a bit, Severus admitted that he was at a loss. What would Nessie like? Perhaps a new blanket for her bed? Nessie deserved a gift that would show her his gratitude for protecting Al as well as she had. Though Severus was admittedly confused, she was a House Elf, why had she decided to bite Yaxley's spawn rather than use her magic?

It was late and the shops were closing, so he promptly bought a heavy down comforter and two fluffy pillows in Slytherin colors for Nessie. Not that what she currently possessed was that particularly shabby, but still she deserved the treat. That done, he Apparated back home.

To his complete astonishment, Nessie had left the kitchen table a frightful mess. There was a clothes iron, a wooden walking stick that gave him unpleasant flashbacks of Lucius Malfoy's cane and other strange items. Was his mind playing tricks on him? Was that an honest to Merlin Quidditch beater club?

Severus was exhausted, both physically and mentally, and therefore he decided that he'd worry about Nessie's out of the ordinary messy streak tomorrow. As it was, he had tentatively scheduled for the early part of the morning, a serious conversation between him and Nessie regarding Al's spontaneous eruptions of wandless energy. It appeared that the catalyst for each of Al's magical outbursts had been Nessie being abused. Severus wasn't sure which was potentially more problematic, that Al was capable of spontaneous outbursts of uncontrolled magic, or that Al had enough awareness to sense that Nessie had been harmed and that Al had desired to protect the House Elf.

Either way, Severus knew that he now had to be very careful dealing with the powderkeg known as Al. The Dark Lord would not be particularly chuffed to realize that Al was regaining his magical ability.

Bloody hell, Al had his physical body, and his magical ability was apparently returning, but where were Al's soul and intellect hiding? If Severus was correct in his hypothesis, the Head Master had willingly torn his soul and his body asunder in order to protect the Rebellion. Perhaps there was a way to heal the Head Master by re-fusing his mental and physical parts. But how? That was the question for another day.

Severus put the contents of the two hampers away, as even though he was slightly hungry, his tiredness was taking precedence. Plus his family deserved to enjoy the munificent bounty of the Malfoy table. Lucius could be a complete arse at times, but Cissy knew how to throw one hell of a party, and she never stinted on anything.

To his complete lack of surprise as it had been THAT type of evening, Severus found that Al had once again taken over most of the bed.

"_No wonder I never saw you to take a lover all those years at Hogwarts, Head Master. You didn't know how to share your bed. It would have taken me only a night or two to break you of that rude and naughty habit, Head Master."_

His cabbage was snuggled against Nessie, and his arms were wrapped around her. Perhaps Al should get his own bed, but Severus had nowhere to put it, and he didn't relish having to move his laboratory. As it was, the tadpole would have to be put in Severus' library, an undersized room that was too small in which to put a full sized bed.

"Budge up, Al," he hissed, as he carefully pushed the sleeping Al toward his side of the bed, but only after carefully ensuring that Nessie didn't fall onto the floor. If Al stubbornly insisted on sleeping with the House Elf as his own personal teddy bear, Severus could just imagine what little space he would have when Al was close to term.

That thought brought the entire situation home to him. In a few short months, there would be _**three**_ children for him to protect. Al, Nessie and the tadpole.

It was overwhelming, the sheer weight of responsibility that having a family put on one's frail shoulders. Before his decisions had been easier, as it had only affected him. But now… his successes or his failures would affect the children. What if he wasn't up to the task of being a proper father? Bluntly, Severus admitted that he didn't have a bloody clue how a father _**should**_ behave. All he had was a few treasured moments where Mr. Evans had been pleasant to a dirty little ragamuffin.

Those few memories wouldn't be enough! What was he supposed to do? Decide what his parents would do in a certain situation and then do the polar opposite?

Fortunately, he remembered his conversation with Minerva, and her parting words.

_Severus? I believe that you'll be a good father, irregardless of the child's irregular conception._

Severus focused on those comforting words until he was fast asleep, his arm resting on Al and Nessie.

* * *

Molly wasn't a vindictive person. 

Truly, she wasn't.

On the other hand, others might say that she was a shrew. Many might also state with firm conviction that she was vindictive and that most assuredly, she was the prime example of an oversexed witch. On those charges, she would admit guilty to the first with mitigating circumstances. Truthfully, how could anyone not be a shrew when dealing daily with Fred and George? But she would plead not guilty on the second charge and guilty as charged on the third.

But Minerva need not carry on like Molly was a vindictive shrew. It wasn't as though Molly had volunteered to be Minerva's nurse just for an easy way of enacting revenge on Minerva declaring the Weasleys dead. She had offered to watch Minerva because Molly aka Muriel was a loyal member of the Order, and "Muriel" was limited in what she could do. Now that she was carrying, she was further restricted.

"Broth?" Molly offered. "You haven't eaten anything today."

A slight curl of Minerva's expressive lip was all the response Minerva gave to that suggestion. Minerva McGonagall loathed broth, as it was on the list of "What Minerva would Never Ever Willingly Touch" right after warm milk.

"Juice?" queried a persistent Molly. Since Filius Flitwick was visiting, Molly knew that Minerva would strive to behave as the very last thing she'd want was reports of her boorish behavior making the rounds of the rebellion.

"Perhaps, a little bit of apple juice might not go amiss, please," Minerva decided after a long pause in which Minerva reminded herself of the need for her to behave. "Please make sure it's cold. I'm sorry, Molly, I know that I'm being waspish."

"Didn't notice a thing," Molly assured her.

The two witches exchanged a glance which confirmed that Minerva knew Molly was lying, and that the older witch was appreciative of the younger witch's empathy. When Molly returned with a chilled pitcher of apple cider, Minerva gratefully thanked her, and then poured the juice into a tumbler.

"To Albus, a damnable daft prat with no taste in clothes," Minerva offered as a toast. She then sipped from the tumble and the witch cheerfully smiled after she swallowed.

"Minerva, did you change that?" Molly quickly questioned, as Minerva happily smiling was not a sight that she had seen since before 'Muriel' had been designated Minerva's official baby sitter. "Did you ferment it into say… 'Apple Jack'?"

Apple Jack was a potent mix of whiskey and apple juice and on occasion, Minerva was known to have a sip or three.

"Molly!" Minerva protested. "I like apple juice."

"Especially when it has been fermented into cider," inserted Filius. "Let me take a sip, Min."

The Charms Instructor took a small, cautious sip from an unresisting Minerva, and then he disapprovingly glared at Min.

"I'm rather disappointed, Minerva. It's not cider!" Filius sadly admitted. "You're behaving!"

"Like I could actually get away with anything with Molly here," Minerva pouted like a sulky first year given an unjustified detention with Filch.

"She's tried to work, and I caught her," Molly stated proudly, as she poured Filius a tumbler of apple juice. "Repeatedly! Minerva was given specific instructions, and she's been busy disobeying!"

"Gryffindors are well renowned for their obduracy, while Ravenclaw is known for seeing the obvious. I promise that I'll keep both my eyes on her and ensure that she behaves. You look tired, Molly, why don't you have a rest? I'll stay here until she goes to bed," Filius promised.

Molly had no faith in Minerva's pledges, but Filius Flitwick was another matter. She gazed at him for a long time, and then she nodded her head in agreement. Molly was feeling a little peaked, and she naively believed that the mild-mannered, much respected Filius Flitwick was a wizard of his word.

In all honesty, Filius normally was a very honorable man, but he was blessed with more than a smidgeon of whimsy. He had survived and thrived at a magical school that often teetered on the brink of complete anarchy thanks to Albus Dumbledore after all. Everyone continually underestimated Filius Flitwick and he quite liked it that way.

"Your husband appeared to be missing you when I last saw him, Muriel." Filius slyly admitted. "Minerva, it was quite evident that Gideon was longing for Muriel."

Alas, a blushing Molly had barely left Minerva's quarters before both mages were busy quaffing Apple Jack.

"She's mothering me to death!" That plaintive protest burst from Minerva's lips before she could stop it.

"Molly's worried about you," Filius assured her. "In fact, we all are. The reason why I'm here is because I thought you'd like to read the latest edition of the Daily Prophet."

"That rag," Minerva dismissively snorted; her contempt for the rag palpable. "Why would I want to read that trash?"

"There was a Phoenix merrily flying over Lucius Malfoy's manor house last night," Filius informed her with real delight. "As instructed, I sent someone to the closest bookstore, but there wasn't a message from Severus."

Minerva looked blank, obviously wondering why a daft Severus had set off a Phoenix over Malfoy's house if he didn't have anything new to report, and Filius prevented himself from sighing out loud. As a teacher, he had less patience for his exceptional students then he should as he expected more from them. Minerva wasn't feeling one hundred percent, and he shouldn't blame her for not seeing the obvious.

"Last night was a big social event for the Death Eaters. Everyone that is anyone was there, and they had to deal with a fiery Phoenix," Filius smirked and then he began to chuckle. "But I truly believe that you'd enjoy Rita Skeeter's latest column. Since you're on bed rest, I know you're bored and in need of light entertainment. You must be bored stiff since Poppy's confiscated your smut!"

The quick response Minerva made to that quip was rather uncouth and Filius' laughter grew louder.

"'My dear faithful readers, I know many of you are wanting to know about the lovely that has stolen the heart of Severus Snape, one of the most eligible wizards of the current era'," Filius' voice was a perfect mimicry of Rita's less than dulcet tones. In his normal tones, Filius continued. "Apparently, Rita hasn't realized that her extremely eligible bachelor is _**exceedingly**_ and _**excessively**_ and _**utterly**_... bent."

"What else did the bug write?" Minerva questioned. In spite of her best efforts, Min was terribly curious about the mother of Severus' child.

"Skeeter wrote, 'I took the liberty of chatting with Severus' intended but Severus' lovely was rather reserved besides being tenderly cosseted by a devoted Snape House Elf. Naturally, I asked all the questions you wanted me to ask, my faithful readers. How did they meet? How did Severus propose? What is 'Mr. Tall, Dark and Handsome like in bed?"

"Mr. Tall, Dark and Handsome?" Minerva shrieked her disbelief. "She did NOT call him that!"

"Does he whisper seductively in her ear? I assure you readers, that if Severus whispered sweet nothings in my ear, I would melt. Mr. Tall, Dark and Handsome does possess a voice of dark chocolate," Filius continued in what only could be described as a coo.

"Merlin's beard! Rita's prose is getting more and more purple by the minute!" Minerva protested. "Voice of dark chocolate? The boy _**drawls**_! I don't know how often I warned him about his need to properly_**enunciate**_ when he was a student."

"Min, love, you're ruining my presentation," Filius retorted. "Do you want to hear about Mr. Tall, Dark and Handsome, or as we affectionately know him here at Hogwarts, Mr. Brusque, Snarky and Acerbic? I predict that Severus will set her office on fire after he reads this!"

With a wave of her hand, a grinning Minerva urged him to continue.

"Alas, the future Mrs. Snape being such a shy soul, was obviously overwhelmed by the magnificent gala that the Malfoys threw. There is a tasty rumor which my secret sources have assured me to be the complete and utter truth, that the soon to be married Snapes are eagerly anticipating an addition to their new family. Severus, unlike most confirmed bachelors, has seemingly enthusiastically jumped into the dual role of both husband and father, and was last seen protectively squiring the ailing mother of his child home early from the party. All I can ask is, since it's obvious that he's a natural, what took you so long to settle down, Severus?'," Filius continued his uncanny mimicry of Rita before changing his voice to Severus' dark yet dulcet tones. "Because you daft cow, I _**like**_ boys!"

Filius laughed so hard he nearly spilled his Apple Jack, and then he settled down.

"Rita also predicts that the prodigies of their couplings will probably be some of the most magically talented students at the new school they're building." Filius continued in his normal tone. "I'm surprised that the soon to be Mrs. Snape didn't say anything for Rita to twist and distort beyond recognition!"

"The reason why the poor girl didn't say anything is because she's been harmed, Filius." Minerva reminded Filius. "Severus says that she doesn't have enough of a mind left to be interested in reading. Get that look off your face; Severus insists that he had nothing to do with that or with the conception of the child. He was just presented with her and she was already pregnant."

Filius shook his head in disgust at that thought. "I'm used to decoding Rita's handiwork, after all, and there's something here that I'm obviously missing. There's the usual disguised snarky comments about the other Death Eaters at the party, veiled comments about what a lousy education Hogwarts gives its students as something truly spectacular appears to have happened involving the fumble fingered Trenton Yaxley, but whatever she's saying about Severus' new love, it's beyond me…"

"How was Severus' intelligence from Galway?" Minerva questioned after a few minutes of watching Filius intently read and reread Skeeter's column. He even read the paper upside down a few times to ensure that he read everything.

"Right on the money. Remus and I agreed that it would be a good idea to strike last night as everyone was at the party of the century." Filius' blues eyes were twinkling, as he waited for Minerva's reaction to that tidbit.

"You _**waited**_ to tell me?" Her voice was nearly a shriek. "I'm sick, _**not**_ dead! Filius, I must be informed when there's a mission…. _**AND WHAT HAPPENED**_?"

"I think I hear Molly returning, Arthur must be occupied with his plugs," Filius quipped. "Drink up, Min! Or I'll charm it back to juice! Poppy is worried that you were skimping on proper nutrition especially your vitamins. Apple Juice has plenty of vitamins; Apple Jack not so much."

"Filius! Please, you must tell me what the Order did!"

"Several small strikes at various offices. The classified section of the Daily Prophet was modified..." Filius' voice slowed after admitting that comment, and his blue eyes were merry.

"Modified?" Minerva questioned.

"It seems that their educational records were posted, and the fact that the majority failed to obtain so much as a single solitary OWL seems to have been a rather well kept secret, don't you think?" Filius admitted. "Considering that they're running the Ministry, it is extremely odd that they're all such colossal dunderheads. Plus, we caught several extremely pissed guests returning from Malfoy's party, and since they were in no shape to have a battle of the wands, we tried the magical damping spell on them. They should be unable to cast anything more powerful than Wingardium Leviosa for the next week or so. That is, if they get over their obscene fetish for Irish sheep. We were tempted to use goats, but we thought Aberforth would complain that it was unfair to the defenseless goats."

Minerva laughed hard, perhaps too hard, as the pain in her head returned, and while she strove to hide her agony from Filius, he knew her too well.

"Take a long hot shower, then get to bed, Min. Don't bother putting your shirt on, as I'll massage your head, neck, shoulders and back. I can feel your tension radiating all the way over here."

Minerva gave a loud gasp of pretend shock, attempting to appear horrified, rather than just pained and weary. "What would _**Muriel**_ say?"

"She'd want a massage also, and Gabriel can handle that." Filius primly answered. "I don't massage married women."

"What if they're women wedded to a doomed cause?" Minerva attempted a forced joviality and realized that she had utterly failed.

To her surprise, Filius put his fingers under her chin, and forced her to look at him. His blue eyes were kindly… but there was a spark in them directed towards her that she hadn't seen in a very long time.

He didn't see her as Minerva McGonagall, the Iron Maiden of the Resistance, Bastion of Hogwarts…. No…

Flitwick saw her as a… _**woman**_.

It had been almost twenty years since Merry Flitwick had died in a magical ambush thanks to Voldemort's followers, and a grief-stricken Filius had mourned his much younger wife's death for all those long years. He had never so much as looked at another woman… and now…

Filius?

Filius' blue eyes were looking at her in _**that**_ special way and it seemed that he heartily approved of what he saw.

That sweet thought honored, humbled and yes, frightened Minerva to her very core.

Minerva had patterned her role as leader after her longtime mentor, Albus, which meant that her Herculean task was her be all and end all. Dumbledore had been so utterly consumed by his role of the Resistance Leader that he had only allowed himself the rarest of stolen moments with Elphias Doge. Therefore, there was no conceivable way that Minerva would able to reciprocate Filius' feelings in a way that the widower deserved. Filius was worthy of far more than a few nicked schoolboy kisses with an exhausted witch.

But damn it, Minerva recalled how those all those too brief episodes of snogging Elphias had given Albus such a much needed boost.

"Well, I confess that I especially enjoy enticing those brave, dedicated women. They are such a challenge, because much like the Pied Piper, I will put my all into leading them astray," Filius gently assured her. "Even you deserve a few stolen moments where the weight of the universe isn't on your shoulders."

Her green eyes were filling with tears, and Minerva roughly brushed her eyes to prevent her tears from escaping.

"Albus was a great mage…. Minerva… but you and I both know that he was lonely, terribly, dreadfully lonely, as he never accepted the simple fact that he was more than deserving of being loved. Don't make the same horrible mistake he did," Filius' voice was full of affectionate concern. "Do not believe in the redemptive power of love so strongly and yet judge yourself inherently flawed and intrinsically unworthy of such a boom."

"Filius," she tried to be gentle, but she needed to nip this in the bud. The sooner Filius' sweet infatuation was nipped, the better for both of them. Well… for him at least… "You deserve better…"

"Hush," he protested. "You need me, Minerva."

Flitwick blushed, and he bequeathed her a smile of gentle amusement.

"Not _**that**_ way, love. You need someone you can trust, who knows that behind the fearless Iron Maiden façade is a woman that needs to be held, touched and caressed. Now, go take your shower, and I'll massage you. Don't worry, I'll keep my touch completely chaste," he promised. "If you agree, I'd like to take this delicate understanding twixt the two of us slowly, to see how it develops."

* * *

She stood in her shower, letting the hot water beat itself against her tense muscle until she was in imminent danger of turning into a large Scottish prune. Since it was only Min in the shower, she allowed herself the rare luxury of tears. 

"I wish I was stronger, Albus. I can't keep this rebellion together, as I lack your ability to install fanatical devotion in my followers. I have no devotees, willing to die for the cause, just a group of weary warriors who bicker and fight among themselves about the best way of surviving another day," she tearfully admitted. "We're focused on merely surviving, not winning the war! My body can't handle the stress. Now… Filius? I tried to gently turn him down, but he didn't listen!"

For a moment, she truly believed that she heard Albus' voice in her head, gently chiding her for her lack of faith.

_And yet, Severus trusts you thoroughly, Minerva. Do you think he would have bought fish and chips for Remus? Mad Eye? Harry? Trust Severus! Trust me! You were my second in everything!_

_But damnit, Albus, you didn't tell me everything that I needed to know! You didn't trust me to tell me everything!_

Albus' chatty spirit had no answer to that, and she exited the shower. Merlin's pants, upon a close inspection in her mirror, Minerva was horrified to realize that she was looking pretty rough. To be honest, pretty rough didn't adequately describe her appearance. She appeared to be the loser of a bloody brawl with a drunken hippogriff, and Minerva had enough pride remaining that she didn't want Filius to see her like that. Recklessly, she cast a pick me up spell, so her eyes were bright and shining, rather than red rimmed and tear stained. It was a foolish gesture as her pain rebounded to a new level of exquisite agony.

Who was she trying to impress? Filius was well aware of her debilitating headaches and one of the few that Minerva trusted enough to be completely honest. Therefore, she cursed her foolish vanity, before she wrapped herself in a large, scarlet and gold fluffy towel that was emblazoned with a rampant lion. Albus had given it to her years… decades… previously as a Christmas present, and she had never sunk so low as to actually use it. But now, she was at her spiritual nadir, and she decided to wrap herself in Gryffindor bravado in order to booster her spirits.

To Minerva's distress, Filius was sitting on the bed, and he had positioned her pillows into a support. That wasn't the problem, it was the fact that Poppy was also there which meant that Filius had ratted her out to the Mediwitch.

"Don't look at me like that. Filius did the right thing by contacting me!" The mediwitch softly protested. "I want you to sit on the edge of the bed. Then drink this, and then you are to immediate lie face down on the bed. Filius will massage you so your muscles will stop spasming."

The mediwitch handed Minerva a small vial, and a sitting Minerva quickly gulped down the potion.

"Nasty!" was her immediate response.

The second less coherent thought was, Poppy had actually unbent enough to give her the really good stuff as the fact that Minerva was wearing only a loosely wrapped Gryffindor towel and a pair of pyjama bottoms wasn't bothering the rather prim and proper Min in the slightest. She was barely lucid enough to assist her two friends as they positioned her on the bed. Floating, a few meters off the ground, she was surprised when she felt Filius' small hands began to lightly and soothingly massage her aching head.

"Can you sense it?" Poppy questioned, her voice sounding as though she was underwater.

Was she under water? Why wasn't she drowning then? She hadn't developed gills, had she? Minerva pondered these farfetched thoughts intently before deciding that Poppy was at the bottom of the sea having a secret assignation with the Giant Squid.

Minerva bit her lip so not to laugh, as she was so buoyant that her laughter would cause her to float off the bed.

"Yes," Filius whispered. His voice was also gargled.

Merlin's scrote! Was Filius involved with Poppy's tryst with the Giant Squid? That was funny, and she laughed. Fortunately as she was holding intently onto the mattress, Minerva didn't float away… but damn it, hadn't Filius stated his interest in her old carcass? She should be miffed, that the shameless Filius was flirting with her and Poppy and the Giant Squid…

The Giant Squid spoke in Severus' voice and he complained that his voice didn't not sound like melted Dark Chocolate, no… he thought his voice sounded like smooth fifty year old scotch.

"Can you pull it out? Put it in the wall like I explained to you? I'd do it, but your hands are far defter than mine."

Poppy wasn't making any sense as what was being put in the wall?

"We should have asked her before we did this," Filius protested. "I shouldn't be rummaging through her brain like this. Merlin's beard, what was in that potion you gave her? I'm sure that she'd have a sharp word or three if she were coherent enough to talk. I can't believe that she's giggling right now."

Actually, Filius' agile hands were so comforting that Minerva would be sorely troubled to dreg up a harsh word. And if Filius was truly interested in shagging, he'd stop telling everyone that she giggled. She had her formidable reputation to maintain.

"If you can relieve the tension that's building, I might be able to better manage her headaches," Poppy reminded him. "There's an all too real possibility that she'll have a brainstorm if she continues to have these headaches. I'm sure Minerva would agree that she'd prefer not to have that happen."

"I do agree indeed," Minerva muttered as her mother had died a slow, lingering death from a paralytic stroke. "But can you keep me like this? This feels amazing."

"Did she just say something?" Filius softly questioned.

"Probably. No doubt giving us strict orders on what to do," Poppy's voice was light. "Or maybe not, I did drug her very heavily so she's probably whispering something illicit to you, Filius."

"I should be so lucky…Wait! There it is!" Filius' voice was intense. "Very well then. Let us hope that this succeeds."

Filius' hands were no longer quite as soothing, instead they were becoming painful. The pressure her head was increasing exponentially and she unwillingly voiced her pain by moaning. Just when Minerva thought she'd involuntary scream from the agony, there was an easing in her discomfort.

"Got it!" Filius quietly exclaimed.

"Put it into the stone, Fi!" Poppy softly but intently commanded. "Stone can hold it, withstand it…"

Minerva bit back her scream, as the pain flared a new, and then with a gentle tug, the hurt was gone. In its place was a warm feeling of delighted contentment, an almost post orgasmic bliss. There was a loud crack as though stone had shattered but Minerva didn't flinch. She back to floating… in a cozy, dark area and Fawkes was cheerfully singing the memories of her excruciating pain away.

"Poor Min, I never realized how agonizing her pain was," whispered Filius.

_I never realized how deft your small hands are, Filius, so I guess we're even._

"This should give her a week or so free from pain, but I wish I could start her on that new potions regiment that sounded promising. It doesn't have the risk for addiction like the narcotic based potions do. There's still the valid concern about the rebound effect, but it would be a new tool in my effort to keep Minerva's migraines manageable."

"Why can't we start her on it?" Filius questioned.

Minerva thought that a wonderful question and she was grateful that Filius was quick witted enough to ask. She was a tad bit distracted as Fawkes was still singing. For a moment, she was surprised that nobody else heard Fawkes, but then Filius gave her a very saucy, very unPhoenixy wink.

_Ah, you're the drugs affecting me…. _

"We don't have the necessary supplies." Poppy's voice was clearer as she admitted that to Filius. "Several of the ingredients need to be fresh picked."

Fawkes stopped singing, and then the Phoenix whispered in Albus' voice, "Tell them to give the instructions to Severus."

"Give to Sevvers…" Minerva muttered.

Fawkes gave her an approving wink with a startling sapphire colored eyed and whispered "Have more faith in yourself, Minerva. It will all work out. As for Filius, _**take**_ what he's offering you, _**grab**_ it with both hands, Minerva, and _**don't**_ let the chance escape! Don't be a stubborn, too proud fool!"

Then the damnable Phoenix disappeared.

_Damn feather duster, it sounded just like Albus, and just acted like him! Popping out when you most needed him after dispensing trite advice on love. Albus! You're a lousy Agony Aunt! You were in love twice! _

_TWICE!_

_Grindlewald was your grand obsession and Elphias was your Hogwarts sweetheart. Elphias desperately wanted the family society would never permit you two to have and so he married a willing girl who longed for a kind, compassionate man for a husband. Yes, his wife knew the truth about the two of you attending conferences together, and she turned a blind eye, but you deserved more than a few stolen days of happiness!_

_How you failed to see that Severus was interested in pursuing a relationship with you, I do not know. He would have been delighted to dally with you for as long as you wanted! Bloody clueless Albus Dumbledore!_

"I beg your pardon?" Poppy questioned. "You were saying, Minerva?"

It took a great deal of effort, but she managed to lift her head off her pillows long enough to regally and clearly order, "Give the instructions to Severus. No doubt he's got plenty of supplies!"

She quickly collapsed back onto her pillows, leaving Filius and Poppy staring at each other in befuddled amusement.

"Yes, let's just ask Severus!" Filius happily chirped. "Why didn't I think of that?"

His moustache quirked and then he stated in his normal tone, "Because you daft Scottish harridan, we don't know how to get into contact with him!"

* * *

Nessie woke the next morning, and to her dismay, she realized that she was in Master's bed. A sleeping Al was cuddling her, and adding to her overwhelming shame, her sharp hearing picked up the sounds of Master's deep breathing. 

_**MASTER WAS IN THE BED! He knew that his nasty, lazy House Elf had despoiled his bed!**_

Yes, Nessie's kind Master had often looked the other way when Al had fallen asleep, clutching her… but after last night after Nessie had failed him so! Then Nessie looked at the clock on the chest of drawers and realized that she had overslept. By now, Al should be up and cleaned, his long hair neatly coifed, and a proper, hot breakfast should be waiting for her hungry, important Master. What a truly horrible House Elf Nessie was, and she nearly voiced her overwhelming fear and terror. She didn't mind being punished, as Nessie was a stupid, slow House Elf, but to have failed her Master repeatedly!

"Wakes up, Al!" Nessie desperately hissed, urgently attempting to awaken the slumbering Al without waking her beloved Master. "Wakes up! Nessie needs to cleans you!"

Al didn't wake, and Nessie grew more frantic. Master didn't want Nessie to use magic on Al, claiming Al was… tetchy.

"Please! Wakey wakey Al!" Her apprehension made her voice shriller than she would have preferred, but Nessie needed to get Al dressed and presentable before Master woke.

"He was never much of a morning person, to be honest. Al will wake when he wants to do so. But Nessie, you and I must talk about what happened last night."

To her shame, Nessie began to uncontrollably weep.

* * *

Severus Snape readily admitted that he didn't understand woman. Merlin knew that heterosexual men didn't understand the fairer sex, so how could a gay boy like him hope to understand such maddening, contrary creatures? Minerva McGonagall utterly baffled him with her fierceness, her obsessive love for speed and Quidditch and the fact that she'd go barmy cooing over a former instructor's newborn baby. Cissy's love for Lucius was incomprehensible to him, and her mindless obsession for parties, embroidery and finery completely unfathomable. 

But he had foolishly believed that he understood the female House Elf. She was infatuated with Al and the baby, and merely tolerated him, but Severus could handle that. He knew first hand the intensity of allegiance that Albus' zealous devotees showered on him, so why would he dissuade her adoration of Al by telling her that Albus would never return her love? Why break her heart? Her life was cruel enough.

But why was she uncontrollably sobbing and begging him to punish her?

The two of them were standing in the kitchen, the House Elf gibbering hysterically about what he should do to her, and Severus finally could take no more. One couldn't blame Severus, he was rather exhausted, Nessie's voice was more than a bit shrill and Severus believed that he was doomed to a long, extremely painful death at the hands of an exceedingly irate, very knocked up Albus Dumbledore.

Plus he desperately wanted a cuppa, and with the hot clothes iron, the cane, the Quidditch bat on the kitchen table among other tortures devices, there was no hopes for him to immediately acquire it.

"Enough!" His voice cut through Nessie's hysterics like a silver knife slices through gillyweed. "Must I give you clothes to silence you?"

That verbal threat caused Nessie to keen once like a banshee and then the Elf collapsed into a catatonic, quivering mass of House Elf flesh. While Severus was staring at Nessie, still recovering from her sonic shriek that completely rattled his brain, he heard Al wake.

_**Great, Sleeping Beauty finally woke up! And all I want is a damn cuppa! Is that too much to ask?**_

* * *

One hour later, after the medicinal quaffing of two small House Elf sized tumblers of butterbeer, an ingestion of a large bar of curative chocolate and a judicious application of a long cuddle session on Al's lap, Nessie was once more able to converse in a sensible manner. 

"Master needs to punish Nessie!" Nessie squeaked.

Merlins' short hairs, they were back to THAT again?

"For this conversation, Nessie will only speak when I give her permission. You may nod your head if you understand," Severus ordered.

Nessie nodded her head rapidly and stared intently at Severus, her big brown eyes full of unshed tears. Whatever she saw in Severus' face frightened her, as the House Elf then hid her face in Al's green dressing gown and began to sniffle loudly.

"In two concise and succinct sentences, kindly explain to me why I should punish you?" Severus used his best instructor's voice, the one that normally caused his students to be blessedly pithy in their explanations.

"Master told Nessie to keep Al out of trouble and Nessie _**DIDN'T**_! That Mean boy HURT AL and Nessie BIT HIM!"

Then there was another banshee shriek of sorrow building, but this time, Severus and his wand were prepared.  
_  
"__Silencio!"_

Nessie continued to shriek silently for a time and then she began to noiselessly and hysterically weep. It was fortunate that Al was still tightly holding her, so a restrained Nessie was unable to self inflict any injuries. Perhaps it wasn't proper to have the vacant headed Al restraining Nessie, but this mess was partially Al's fault, so Al somehow had to pay the piper.

"Nessie, I am quite content with how you defended Al last night. In fact, I was so pleased with your dedicated service that I had decided that you deserved a present." Severus calmly stated, as though a mute, hysterically shrieking House Elf was nothing out of the ordinary for him.

But then again, after being an instructor at Hogwarts for near two decades, there was very little that he hadn't seen. He had seen hysterical House Elves quite a few times over the years, which is why he knew that butterbeer, chocolate and a hug could calm their hysteria down to manageable levels.

If and when Severus ever saw Filius Flitwick again, he must remember that he owed the Charms Master for sharing that trade secret with him.

"A_present_ for Nessie?" silently mouthed the stunned House Elf.

Merlin's scrote, she was in tears again! At this rate, Al would need to be changed… AGAIN. Twice! Before breakfast! Plus no doubt, Al's delicate tummy would erupt in protest shortly as he had reached the power puking stage.

"Yes, a present for Nessie from both Al and myself for taking such stellar care of him. I understand that you love Al deeply and that's why you are so needlessly worried about last night. But I need to discuss last night in detail with you, but I won't talk to you if you're in hysterics."

That threat settled Nessie down to being somewhat calmer, though she was still prone to sniffling.

"You may answer only yes or no to my question. Will you cease your needless caterwauling if I give you permission to talk?"

Nessie nodded her head, and Severus refrained from curtly snapping, "I told you yes or no, I did not give you permission to nod your head!"

"Very well, you can change Al into drier clothes. When you're done you can check your bed for your present," Severus informed her.

Just because the very idea of becoming a father had turned his stone heart to mush didn't mean that Severus Snape would spoil his children. He had his standards after all.


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer #1 - Not my Characters.

Disclaimer # 2 - AU, Dark Fic, pregnancy, Mpreg.

A/N # 1 – More than a wee smidgeon of MM/FF.

* * *

Al was having a wonderful dream. He was _**flying**_, soaring in the bright blue sky and that bright, fiery beauty was alongside him. It was singing and trilling in its high pitched voice. Al was happy, truly happy, and Al knew that if the dream continued for just a little bit longer, all of Al's unvoiced questions would be answered.

_Who was he? Why did his head ache so? Why didn't he understand anything? Why did he have this unholy feeling that something wasn't quite right?_ _Why did he wake in the middle of the night, remembering horrible, horrible pain and mocking laughter?_

The two of them were airborne, high above the clouds that seemed to mere cotton balls and he knew… just a little closer… a little closer and at last comprehension would be his. The flyby was singing louder and there was optimism and healing in its voice. The bright thing knew who Al truly was and… it desperately wanted him to remember… The dazzling flyby was lonely, terribly lonely and it was heartbroken and forlorn because Al had abandoned it. Al was inconsolable that he had hurt the bright thing. He wept for the pain he had caused, and it cried also. Its tears burnt like acid, but he accepted the pain as his punishment. It wasn't right to harm such a pretty thing.

_It's not your fault_, _you had no other choice_, the bright thing assured him. _I agreed to our severance but I miss you so. It's frightening to be separated from you after all our time together. You sorely need healing, and yet for your safety, I dare not heal your wounds. You have an imperfect form of protection being limited as you are now, but you have those two who have appointed themselves as your guardians. Never fear, I also still keep watch over you._

Gracelessly, Al floundered in the air due to his astonishment, causing his stomach to lurch threatening.

_I understand you!_ _Do you understand me?_

The bright thing laughed. It was a merry sound, and the creature's laughter filled Al's soul with hope.

_Yes, I understand you. You are mine and I am yours._ _Together, we are complete!_

_WHO AM I? What happened to me? Who are you? What are you?_

A loud shriek woke him just as the pretty flyby was about to answer his questions. For a brief moment, Al was furious, but he then grew fearful. The voice that was keening was familiar to him, though she rarely wailed like that. It was Nes! Someone had _**hurt**_ Nes! Was it that Not Good boy from last night?

Al had done something last night, and as a result, people had been afraid. He had mentally reached … and twisted just so… and loud explosions and the breaking of things had occurred. Al had been so scared, as he'd know he'd be horribly punished, but Nes had been in trouble.

Nes was Good. Al knew that and accepted that she was his one constant in his life. Perhaps, she was one of the guardians that the bright thing had mentioned. Al hoped that at one time he was the type who would be upset when something Good was hurt. Perhaps, he had even been brave enough to protect Good things; therefore, he got out to bed to defend his Nes.

It took some time, as his body seemed awkward and off balance these days, but he found a silent Nes quivering while a rather cross Sev picked her off the floor. Sev saw that Al was watching Nes, and Sev imperiously pointed toward the couch.

"Sit, Al!"

Something was wrong with Nes, and Sev was unhappy.

_Had Sev done something to Nes? _

He was still debating the issue, tentatively attempting to stretch like he done last night, and how best to respond when Severus not so gently grabbed him by his arm and forced him into the couch. The disruption distracted him and he lost his mental grasp on his wispy response. Last night, the power had come to him so easily; today he strained and strained to unsuccessfully wake the slumbering beast within him.

Why couldn't he protect Nes like he had last night? Wasn't it a Good thing to do?

Such difficult thoughts were banished when he was presented with the trembling Nessie and his arms were securely positioned around the House Elf. She clung to him desperately, and he felt sad. Nes was so nice to him, comforting him whenever he felt confused, frightened or gloomy, and he wished he could do something similar for her.

Hesitantly, he began rubbing her back, as he liked it when she rubbed his tummy. It took some time, but as he grew more assertive in rubbing her back, he was rewarded with a very subdued purr from the trembling House Elf. Sev appeared alarmed about how strange Nes was acting, and he poured her not one, but two glasses of something that smelled delicious. A fearful Nes protested as she didn't want to drink the liquid, but with a few curt words from Sev, the House Elf drank. Whatever the drink was, it seemed to calm her, as she no longer trembled in his arms.

It smelled Good, whatever it was, and Al licked his lips. Perhaps, Sev might let him have a swallow?

"No, you can't drink this, Al," Severus informed him. "But you can have the chokie."

Nes was given sweets and he was allowed some. Perhaps, it was a Good thing that he hadn't defended Nes? Would Sev be giving Nes chokies if he were truly cross with the House Elf? No, from personal experience, Al knew that chokies were only given at special times; when he needed comfort, and on on the infrequent times when he was being rewarded.

Rubbing circles on her back seemed to calm Nes, as her purring grew steadily louder. Nes and Sev talked, and Al wished he understood what they said for Nes became upset once more and tightly clutched at him. Her heart was racing, as he could feel it beating as he continued to rub her back. She was sniffling, and attempting to hide her face from Sev in Al's clothes, and then there was still more conversing between the two of them. Then Nes wiggled out of his arms, and landed on the floor.

She gave Al a tremulous smile, and her big brown eyes were tear stained, but she held out her hands to him.

"Nessie cleans Al," she told him. "Nessie then brushes Al's pretty hair."

Those were familiar, comforting sounds to him, which he knew meant that she soon would wash and dress him and fix his hair. The House Elf enjoyed braiding his long hair, as she always happily hummed while she brushed it. All was once again right with Al's little world and he was pleased because Nes was content. He held out his gnarled, twisted hands to her, and she tenderly wrapped her hand around his crooked index finger.

"I'll make breakfast," Sev announced. Nessie squeaked in protest which made Al uneasy, but Sev reassuringly patted Al's shoulder. "Nessie, our baby needs to be fed. You'll get him presentable and I'll make breakfast. Hurry, as that way you can open your present before breakfast."

* * *

For a wonder, Nessie didn't weep from sheer joy when she opened her presents. No, instead, she just stared at her new down comforter and pillows. Her big brown eyes were wide and her two ears were folded tightly against her head. Hesitantly, she touched the comforter, and then quickly pulled her hand back as though the House Elf was fearful of dirtying it.

Then she gazed upon him and Severus nodded his head once.

"Pretty things is really for Nessie?" Nessie doubtfully whispered.

"Yes," he calmly stated in what he hoped was a paternal tone. He needed a great deal of practice after all, and it was best if he started acting appropriately now. Old habits were the hardest to break, after all. "Perhaps you weren't listening when I assured you of that basic truth earlier?"

Severus had to confess to himself that his last comment was more than a tad bit snide. Mr. Evans would never have spoken to Lily's dirty ragamuffin friend like that. On the other hand, Tobias had often said far worse to him, so perhaps, a sympathetic instructor might give him a D for dismal due to his Herculean effort, rather than a T. Hopefully, intensive practice with both Al and Nessie in the upcoming months would make it easier for Severus to become the father he wished to be.

"Nessie doesn't deserves kind, generous and handsome Master," she plaintively whispered. "Nessie know she is clumsy, slow and stupid, and Master deserve a better House Elf. Nessie will tries still harder to please her Master!"

She just stared at him, her despairing soul in her big brown eyes. Severus had an uneasy premonition that Nessie would work herself into a complete physical collapse in her struggle to prove herself worthy.

Merlin's scrote, how did the Headmaster handle this mindless adoration everywhere he turned? No doubt the Headmaster believed it was a balm to the supplicant's pride to steadfastly refuse to recognize their zealous devotion. What Albus failed to realize was his lack of acknowledgement only caused the dedicated devotee to struggle still harder to earn the oblivious Albus' regard. Merlin knew that Severus Snape was living proof of _**that **_particular hypothesis.

How many times had he assumed that if he strove just a little harder that the Headmaster might realize that the reason why Severus still served him after all this time had less and less to do with Lily Potter and her damnable son? Yes, that was part of the reason why he was still loyal, but damn it, he _**willingly**_ served because of the Headmaster.

He couldn't subject Nessie to that non-escapable cycle of ever escalating guilt, doubt and Herculean struggle. Naturally, Severus would deny it with his very last dying breath, but Severus wasn't a completely heartless monster. He had a heart, it was only two sizes too small.

"I doubt you could try any harder," Severus curtly retorted.

Merlin's scrote, he was still getting a D for dismal. What would the Head Master have said? Something warm and fuzzy, happy and clappy, and his blue eyes would be merrily a twinkle with gleeful amusement. Well, Severus' black eyes were most assuredly weren't going to twinkle so Nessie would have to accept it.

"It's obvious you love Al and you're taking extremely good care of him and the baby. That's what is important to me, and that's why I decided to give you a present."

There! That rated an Acceptable. Perhaps, he would have earned an E if he hadn't buggered it up originally.

Her ears furiously quivered and her shoulders were slumped, which meant he had upset her. Plus she was staring at the floor. The mental image of Filius Flitwick crossing out his A and scrawling a rather elaborate T came to his mind, and no matter how hard he tried to banish it from his conscience, there the terrible T remained.

Merlin's scrote! When Minerva had been loading him down with the Pregnancy for a Daft Prat books, why hadn't she slipped into the pile a book detailing the incomprehensible relationship between a Zealous House Elf and her Clueless Master?

"Nessie love her Master," the House Elf shyly whispered, a crimson blush staining her fair skin except for the old scars from her former Mistress. "Nessie love Master far more than Nessie love Al and baby. Al and baby has Nessie and Master, but Master only haves Nessie. Kind, generous and handsome Master deserve better than Nessie's love but it is she can gives him!"

Merlin's tattered and stained Y-front bunched up and knotted complete with a bow, how was he supposed to answer that truly unexpected and unsolicited, spontaneous outburst of loyalty and adoration?

_Headmaster? Any suggestions?_ _Right now, you'd be offering me a sweet. _

No answers came, which meant that Snarky, Sarcastic Severus had to muddle through as best as he could.

"Breakfast is ready. I trust that you'll join Al and me," was what he decided to say.

Nessie began jumping up and down in her excitement, and Severus made a mental note.

_**Food rewards apparently work for both Nessie and Al.**_

* * *

A happy Nessie vigilantly cut Al's food just so, and then she carefully fed him. He savored the taste even though he was truly ravenous. Al had learned from hard earned experience that eating too fast would cause an unpleasant eruption when his stomach rebelled. Sometimes, even when he ate carefully, his unruly belly would still protest.

Nes and Sev were busy chatting and he was content to hear their voices. He didn't comprehend what they were saying, but he still half heartedly listened. He was far too busy internally debating whether he had been Good or Not Good before whatever had happened to him to pay much attention to their conversation. That had been a Not Good thought that had kept him awake in the middle of the night, and ate away at his soul. Maybe he had been so very Not Good that the other Not Goods had banded together to punish him. That dark thought had truly frightened him, but would Nes be so nice to him if he had been so very Not Good? Would Sev be as kindly to him as he was, if Al had been an Exceedingly Not Good?

Perhaps, he had been always been damaged, and he was only meant to understand the bright flyby. That thought gave him a great deal of comfort, as it meant that Al was no longer completely alone in this strange world. An added bonus was that the bright flyby greatly disturbed the Not Goods which reassured Al that he had been Good or close to it at one time.

Hopefully.

_**Please?**_

"Nessie, last night, when the china spontaneously exploded…" Sev stated.

Nes paused in feeding him, the large spoon holding his mushrooms hovering halfway between his plate and his mouth. It was hard for Al to be serene and uncomplaining when it was _**his**_ mushrooms being held hostage by Nes and Sev, but he couldn't adequately express his displeasure. He also could not feed himself. That had been attempted only once, and it had been an utter cockup.

"Nessie doesn't know how that happened. Nessie doesn't use magic against humans!" The House Elf quickly assured Sev.

The spoon wavered slightly, and he leaned toward it. Victory was his when he managed to capture the utensil with its savory contents in his mouth. Al began chewing the mushrooms and realized entirely too late that he had too many in his mouth.

"Is that why you bit the brat?" Sev questioned. Then Sev made a sighing noise. "Al… you're making a bloody mess. You can't eat an entire serving spoon worth of mushrooms."

Sev took a wet towel and roughly wiped Al's dirty face after Al had spit up the mushrooms into his napkin. Meanwhile Nes stammered a sincere apology.

"It's not your fault, Nes. He was ever single-minded in his pursuit of breakfast, and mushrooms in particular." Sev reassured her. "I believe the disturbances last might were spontaneous eruptions of magic from Al in response to you being harmed. We have to be extremely careful that he doesn't do that again. The Dark Lord will be quite cross when he realizes that Al's magic is returning."

Nes stared at Sev, and Sev slowly explained the situation to her. "He might hurt Al and the baby. He might even have them… _**killed**_… if he believed that Al's magic was returning."

That earned a squeak of protest from Nes and she roughly clutched Al's hand. He managed to prevent himself from moaning from the pain, as Al was positive that Nes didn't truly mean to hurt him. Normally, she was exceptionally gentle with his gnarled and twisted hands that painfully ached at the best of times. Plus, she put his hands in that thick warm goo, and then carefully massaged them which helped to alleviate their hurting.

Meanwhile, Al attempted to pay attention as they were mentioning those words bay bee again. Why did they keep repeating those words over and over again? He put his free hand over his belly, wanting to show to Sev and Nes that he understood _**where**_ the bay bee was.

It was just that Al still didn't know what it was.

* * *

"Why don't you use magic against humans? If Al was being harmed, I'd want you to defend him," intently questioned Severus.

"Mistress said Bad Nessie not to use magic against her childrens or any other humans," Nessie explained. Then she blurted out, "Nessie didn't means to hurt Mistress' son, but he twisted my burnt ear. He hurted Nessie so, but Bad Nessie cried. Bad Nessie didn't wants to hurt him. Nessie was very sorry for hurting him."

Hesitantly, she touched her scarred, disfigured ear, and then she looked at Sev with a pleading look, silently begging her Master to understand why she had reacted in such a horrible way.

"He hurts Nessie so, and Nessie repeatedly begs him to stop. Mistress' son just laughed at Nessie's pain."

"Well, whatever commands that bitch gave you; you are to completely forget them. You're my House Elf now, not hers, and you're only to listen to me. If some brat deliberately hurt you, I'd expect you to defend yourself by whatever means necessary." Severus stated. "Though I expect you to be patient with the baby after it is born. It might accidentally yank your ear and not mean to hurt you."

"Nessie knows!" She softly protested. "Nessie loves baby! Nessie swears that Nessie would never hurt Master's baby!"

"I know, but I had also incorrectly believed that you only obeyed my instructions," Severus calmly informed her. "I was wrong about that."

To give credit where it was it was due, Severus was truly attempting to be less acidic than his norm. Unfortunately, the sensitive Nessie's face crumpled at his comment, and her ears went flat against her head. Severus' mental Filius Flitwick seemed quite perturbed as there was no grade worse than T that he could bestow on Severus.

"Nessie is bad," she sorrowfully whispered. "Stupid, stupid House Elf. Master deserves better than Nessie. Master should finds hisself a better, smarter House Elf than Nessie."

"No, you're not. You're the only House Elf I want, and you'll have to accept that as the truth. You've been mistreated rather badly by your previous Mistress, and you naturally fear that I'll treat you the same way," Severus said. "But my orders to you are simple. You are to keep Al and the baby safe. If anything happens to me, you are to consider yourself Freed, and you are to take Al and the baby to Minerva McGonagall. She'll handle the rest. Will you be able to locate her if anything happens to me?"

"Nessie finds her, Nessie promises. Nessie will be as quickly as possible!" Nessie's words tripped over themselves in her haste to prove her earnestness.

"If I introduce you to Minerva, will that help you be able to locate her? She'll be heavily warded; perhaps you will not be able to sense her through her shields." He didn't mean to imply that he doubted the House Elf, but it was quite important that Minerva could be found.

"Yes, if Nessie could Smells her, Nessie can find her anywhere," Nessie assured him. "Even if Miss Minerva is Warded."

Sev was sipping his tea, and at that revelation, he firmly put his cuppa down, so hard was the impact that the tea sloshed over the sides.

"House Elves can do _**that**_?" Severus questioned. "You locate anyone, even if the location where they are has been Charmed?"

Nessie energetically nodded her head.

_Merlin's polka dotted robe! If the Dark Lord ever knew THAT… Hogwarts would be doomed._

"That ability might prove useful, but you are to keep that information between just us," commanded Severus. "Very well, I'll arrange for a meeting between you two. You are not to make any mention of the fact that Al is male. In fact, it's best if you don't use his name at all. Call him…Mistress…when you speak of him to anyone. Minerva is a kind soul but a bit of a traditionalist. The fact that Al is male would be quite hard to explain. She might believe our baby is tainted by Dark Magic."

_Plus, she'd be far too likely to burn off my privates first and then ask questions._

"No! Master's baby isn't tainted by Dark Magic. He smells clean!" Nessie quickly assured him, nearly bouncing off her chair in her zealousness to assure her Master of that happy tiding. "Baby good!"

_He smells clean?__**  
**_  
"Al smells clean?" Severus questioned, very much confused by Nessie's indiscriminate use of pronouns.

"Yes, but Master's son smell clean. He clean." Nessie assured Severus and then she nodded her head for added emphasis.

_I'm to have a son with Albus? Sweet Merlin, a son? I'll have to think of a proper name! Though it would be rather droll to call him Salazar Dumbledore Snape. _

"_**Him**_? Are you saying that we're having a boy? You can smell Dark Magic?" Severus questioned. It appeared that there was much that Severus did not know about House Elves and he intended on rectifying the situation as soon as possible. "Gaeta says she can't tell me what the baby's sex is until a few months from now."

"Yes, Master and Al is having a son," Nessie patiently explained as though she believed that a Severus was doubting her keen sense of smell. "Boy baby smells different than girl. Nessie knows Dark Magic, know how babies smell when they inside. Mistress smelled of Dark Magic and her babies stank. Al smells sweet so does Master's baby, Nessie's Mistress smelled foul."

Nessie looked stricken at that confession, as she belatedly realized that she had spoken ill of her former sadistic Mistress and her numerous, ill mannered spawn. The House Elf grabbed her head as though zealously determined to bash the wicked thought out of her skull.

"No! Master orders Nessie not to hurt herself!" Severus growled. Then in a louder tone, he ordered, "_**STOP IT!"**_

Al made a squawking noise and the damn china rattled. Nessie squeaked and then she began energetically rubbing Al's tummy. When that failed to settle Al down, she began to croon a lullaby. Al's vacant blue eyes were firmly fixed on Severus, and Severus then reached for Al. Gently cupping Al's face in his hands, he Delved into the empty mind of Albus Dumbledore.

_**That is quite enough of that bad behavior!**_ _**The Dark Lord will punish you most severely if he ever finds out!**_

The only response to that was now the china was vibrating hard enough to spontaneously fall part. It would be only a few more minutes at most, before the china exploded. He needed to nip this in the bud before the Dark Lord or one of the Death Eaters noticed the build up of uncontrolled magic and decided to investigate. Regretfully, he Delved once more in Al's mind and sternly ordered him to stop misbehaving. For good measure, Severus included the memory of the Dark Lord Delving into Al's mind when he had searched for confirmation that Al was responsible for the fiery Phoenix.

_**AL DOESN'T DESIRE A REPEAT OF THAT, DOES HE?**_

The china stopped rattling, and instead, Al started shaking. He made a mewling noise and then he retreated inward. He pulled his hands close to his chest, and Al nearly fell out of his chair but through sheer luck, Severus managed to prevent that from happening. Merlin's scrote, a traumatized Al was retreating into the foetal position, and Severus requested that Nessie assist him get Al to the floor.

That accomplished, Severus crisply requested that Nessie pull the blankets off his bed. Al continued to retreat into the foetal position; his back curved forward, his legs brought up tightly against his belly. His head was bowed, and his arms were wrapped around his head as though he was protecting it from physical harm.

Carefully, Severus began rubbing Al's tense neck, concentrating on massaging away the rock hard tension in Al's muscles. Spell casting would be dangerous right now, as there was no way he could be sure how Al would react. As it was, it was rather dicey for him to touch the frightened Al but there was no way he could just leave Al as he was.

_**I'm so sorry, Al. I didn't mean to scare you.**_ _**You frightened me just now. **_

Nessie quickly returned with her new blankets and pillows, awaiting further instructions.

"Warm the blanket up, so it's warm. Not too hot, but warm as the candle wax we use on his hands," Severus ordered.

_**Please come back. Please come back, Al. I didn't mean to frighten you.**_

Nessie covered her friend with the blanket, and gently positioned the pillows under Al's head. That done, she reached for one of Al's hand, and she began to massage it. Her soft croon filled the air as she attempted to comfort her friend.

When at last Al's neck muscles were loose and relaxed, Severus' hands moved down to Al's tight shoulders. It was bitterly ironic how at one time he would have savored the opportunity to massage Albus. There would have been wine and candles, perhaps soft music and the massage lotion would have been carefully enhanced so that Albus would have achieved the utmost in spiritual and physical relaxation from the experience.

Never would he have believed that he'd be massaging the shattered physical shell of a senseless Albus Dumbledore.

_**You're safe, Al. I won't let Him hurt you. Nobody will hurt Al.**__**  
**_

* * *

Filius Flitwick had _**incredible**_ hands.

That was Minerva's first coherent thought in a very long time. After waking after a long, deep sleep, Minerva had discover that Filius was still in her bedroom watching over her. Upon noticing that she was awake, Filius again offered to massage her aching head. Her head was only throbbing, thank Merlin. She could deal with that level of discomfort as it was manageable. It was only when her head felt as though it would explode from the building pressure that she couldn't muddle through her day.

Filius had sounded so hopeful that it might bring her complete relief that she agreed. What would it be like to be completely pain free for even a short time? Minerva was practical through and through; she wouldn't dare hope that she'd experience a miraculous relief in her discomfort.

Then to her astonishment, Flitwick's incredible hands had banished even the wispy remnants of her migraine to parts unknown.

Perhaps incredible wasn't the right word, Minerva would hate to damn the Charms Master with faint praise. His hands were nimble, proving that his dexterity was not limited to his mental abilities. All of her tense, spasming muscles were aggressively sought out and massaged, kneaded and rubbed into complete and utter submission.

Well, some parts of her had been kneaded into submission; there was a distinct part of her that wanted nothing more than to hop on Filius' broomstick for a joyride. If Filius managed to turn her into a purring pile of ooze with only a mere massage, what would bedding the Charms Master be like? Would she even _**survive**_ the night? Minerva remembered all too well that old saw about the joys of bedding a Charms Master, as it wasn't the size of the wand, but the magic in the wizard.

Bloody hell, no wonder Merry Flitwick had always seemed so damn blissful!

"How was that?" Filius softly whispered in her ear. "Headache all gone?"

She muttered an unintelligible response, and Filius softly chuckled.

"Care to repeat that?" He teased.

"I asked you, Filius, if you'd fancy a shag?" Minerva quipped. The moment the jest left her lips she knew it was a mistake. Filus wasn't the type to have a quick tumble, but damn it, she couldn't promise him anything more.

She sat up quickly in her bed, ensuring that all her bits were covered as it would make a bad situation even worse to flash the Charms Master. Immediately after ensuring that she was presentable, Minerva sincerely apologized for her flippancy. To her surprise, Filius placed one finger against her lips to silence her.

"I told you, Minerva, I'd like to take this delicate understanding twixt the two of us slowly, to see how it develops. Yes, dear, I'd fancy a shag, but I rather make love to you. You deserve far better than a tumble and a shy goodbye. I've felt this way for a while, but I was chary of ruining our tight friendship by confessing my changing feelings toward you," Filius earnestly assured her. "You can always find a thousand souls willing to shag, but a friendship like ours? It's taken decades to develop and mature into a very fine Scotch."

"Filius, I can't promise you anything," Minerva protested. "Perhaps, you should accept the fact that there's no chance for more than a tumble with me. Cut your losses, Filius, before I hurt you by not being able to give you what you desire."

Her eyes watered, and she blinked her eyes rapidly to prevent her damning tears from spilling.

"You've learned too well from your instructor and mentor, Albus," was Filius' immediate response. "And yet, you failed to completely understand the course material. He was terribly lonely, Minerva, and no lover had shared his bed in years. You know as well as I do that Severus would tumbled Albus, yet Albus refused to see that Severus was an adult capable of making such offers. Don't get so focused on the war that you blind yourself to possibilities. Carpe diem, Min. While we speak, time is envious and is running away from us. Seize the day, Min."

_I'd rather seize the Charm Master_, Minerva leeringly thought.

Filius' blue eyes were amused and he quirked a smile.

"Someone just had a naughty thought just now," he teased.

"Yes," Minerva softly admitted. _In for a knut, in for a galleon_ was the Gryffindor motto. "I was pondering the proprieties of asking someone if he might secretly desire to kiss me? I'm so woefully out of practice on what is considered proper courting behavior that I fear that he might believe I'm a brazen hussy."

She was reward with a quick smile from Flitwick.

"I'd like to kiss you," he admitted. "Well, I must also confess that I'm at least twenty years out of date with regards to social traditions. I fear that my gallant, chivalrous nature may prove too leisurely for you."

"I am of the firmly held belief that gallantry is a lost art," she slowly admitted. "I am delighted to find myself in the presence of such an accomplished practitioner of Lost Arts."

Carefully, he cupped her face with his hands, and then he brushed her lips against hers. Slowly, Filius explored her lips, taking his time, wishing to relish this new sensation. It had been so long for the both of them that they were as hesitant as bashful students stealing a kiss beneath the Quidditch stadium. Gradually, as they grew comfortable with one another, their kiss grew more assertive and increasingly passionate, until they needed to break apart in order to catch their breaths.

"Merlin! I'll need Poppy to thoroughly check out my heart. I experience many kisses like that and it may kill me," Filius teased. He quickly rubbed his chest as though he was experiencing chest pain.

"I think your heart is strong enough," Minerva retorted, and then the witch proceeded to kiss Filius once more to prove her point.

They were so involved with their snogging that they failed to realize that the woman known as Muriel Arundel had gotten quite the raree show. She exited Minerva's quarters, deciding it was for the best if the two mages were uninterrupted. Molly, for all her numerous faults, was a true romantic, and she encouraged it wherever she went.

* * *

"So, Minerva and Filius?" Remus quipped in stunned disbelief after Molly shared that particular tasty tidbit with a few select souls. "I figured a Ravenclaw would know better than to risk a romantic entanglement with a Gryffindor Lioness."

He flashed a quick smile to show them that he was being a daft prat and that no harm was meant by his jest.

"I heartedly approve," Poppy stated. "Filius has a kind heart, but Minerva won't be able to walk over him. He'll ensure that she doesn't overextend herself."

"To Minerva and Filius!" Arthur happily toasted. "In these dark times, it is wonderful that love still can be unexpectedly found. I know Albus would heartedly approve of this astonishing development."

"Minerva and Filius!" Remus, Poppy and Molly stated.

Three glasses of apple jack and one glass of apple juice were clicked together, and then drunk.

"Minerva should be free from her headaches for the next week or so. Filius has demonstrated that he has the knack to ease her pain," Poppy explained.

She was rewarded with a knowing snort from Remus.

"Get your mind out of the gutter, Remus," Molly retorted. "This is why we can't let anyone know about them. Sirius would relish the chance to tease Minerva about this, and Filius would be mortified if his feelings for Minerva were reduced to a Sirius Black punch line. Merlin knows both of them deserve some happiness."

"Very well then, we can run interference," Remus decided. "Sirius is rather easy to distract."

* * *

The power had come to Al unbidden, and Sev had not been happy. Sev's voice was in his head, and he didn't understand what Sev was saying.

_**That is quite enough of that bad behavior!**_ _**The Dark Lord will punish you most severely if he ever finds out!**_

Flashes of memory. Al was screaming and screaming while that soulless monster laughed. There were others there, and they were hurling hexes at him, and still he screamed. His voice broke and still he screamed. He had no breath left, and still Al continued to scream.

_**AL DOESN'T DESIRE A REPEAT OF THAT, DOES HE?**_

There was another burst of memories that exploded in his mind like fireworks on a summer night. Al remembered all too well the Dark Lord Delving into Al's mind when he had searched for confirmation that Al was responsible for the fiery Phoenix.

_Phoenix? Is that bright thing a Phoenix?_

That memory relived, brought other memories to the forefront of his mind. The Dark Lord was in his mind, Al remembering all to well the excruciating agony of his wits being savagely ripped and shredded while he had sobbingly pleaded for mercy. The rabid jackals had watched and mocked as Al had writhed in the mud, puking and soiling himself.

There would be no mercy from that black hearted beast, Tom, and yet, he had beseeched and implored for leniency. Al needed time, enough time to put his plan into motion. Let Tom have his amusement, he'd no longer be laughing quite as hard when he realized that he had been outsmarted.

He had to protect the rebellion and Hogwarts, and there was only one way he could do so.

_**I hereby resign my position as Hogwarts Headmaster! My successor will be Minerva McGonagall! She is given the full rights and responsibilities of that hallowed position, and the castle will acknowledge her as his rightful Mistress!**_

That detail handled, he then severed the sacred bonds linking his body, his soul, magic and intellect, his wand and his familiar and he gave them to Fawkes to disperse. It was bitterly ironic that he had gotten the very idea about severing his soul into bits from Tom Riddle himself.

_**Don't let him find them, Fawkes.**_ _**If he brings them together, he'll have me under his sway. Once my physical body dies, you are to locate Minerva and aid her. Not before, Fawkes, I command you! She'll want to rescue me and my usefulness to the cause will be quite limited. **_

The pain was excruciating, overwhelming his fractured sanity, and a severely traumatized Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore curled up into the foetal position. The hexes continued to land upon his still form, but he no longer screamed.

There no longer was any pain, no despair, no grief. There was only nonexistence, and Al let himself willing drown in Oblivion.

Someone was touching him, rubbing him, apologizing for hurting him. But he was far too gone to respond to that familiar voice.

Over London, an inconsolable Phoenix burst into flames.

* * *

_**A/N#2 - Silverthreads have a very valid point on her review.** _

_I think it sad that in your universe a person can be born bad (Dark, stinking). I can't imagine how an infant can be born "bad." lack of bonding can create a human that has no empathy (a sociopath), but caught and dealt with early enough, even that can be reversed._

That's such a good point but I truly didn't quite mean it like that. For Nessie, magic has smells. Her old mistress, was a follower of He Who Must Not be Named, and she was abusive to Nessie. Therefore Nessie associated her smell with "badness" and "Dark Magic". Since Al and Severus have been kind to her (They haven't burnt her ear or broke her toe, plus Sev slips her chokies), she equates their smell with "good".

You need to pardon Nessie's comment, she was trying too hard to reassure Sev that his baby is good. (She has a bit of a crush on Severus, I'm afraid.)

* * *


	12. Chapter 12

_A/N#1 - Silverthreads had a very valid point on her review._

_I think it sad that in your universe a person can be born bad (Dark, stinking). I can't imagine how an infant can be born "bad." lack of bonding can create a human that has no empathy (a sociopath), but caught and dealt with early enough, even that can be reversed._

That's such a good point but I truly didn't quite mean it like that. For Nessie, magic has smells. Her old mistress was a follower of He Who Must Not be Named, and she was abusive to Nessie. Therefore Nessie associated her smell with "badness" and "Dark Magic". Since Al and Severus have been kind to her (Ok, Severus has been nice to her, as he hasn't burnt her ear or broke her toe plus Sev slips her chokies, while Nessie has a great deal of empathy for "Silent Al") therefore she equates their smell with "good".

You need to pardon Nessie's comment; she was trying too hard to reassure Sev that his baby is good. (She possesses such a horrible crush on Severus, I'm afraid.) Yes, that means that Sev and Al's bouncing baby boy could easily be Evil Incarnate.

* * *

A catatonic Al was gently picked up from the floor, changed for bed and then his rigid arms and legs were carefully rearranged so he could be tucked into bed. For good measure, Severus ordered Nessie to nestle with Al. Perhaps, somewhere, in the damaged psyche of a terrified wizard once known as Albus Dumbledore, Al would sense Nessie's comforting presence and be reassured.

"Master? What happens with Al?" Nessie softly questioned. Severus gently bent Al's arms so that they were wrapped around the House Elf. That done, he gently closed Al's wide staring eyes. No doubt it would help Al fall asleep, plus, Severus felt suitably guiltily without those blank, blue eyes accusingly staring at him,_ thankyouverymuch_.

"Al was saddened when you attempted to hurt yourself. He doesn't like it when you harm yourself," Severus carefully explained.

"Nessie sorry!" She tearfully exclaimed. "Nessie no mean to upsets Al!"

For a moment, Severus worried that Nessie was about to self-harm because of her species' intensive conditioning, but then she realized that such a display would further upset Al. Instead, she trembled slightly, and softly sniffled. Truly, Nessie was a remarkable House Elf, as most Elves would have just performed the apparently obligatory episode of self-harm, realized their error, and then they would promptly had another incident of self-mutilation to show sufficient penance. It would have been a never ending cycle.

"It is not your fault," Severus assured her. It was the truth, Nessie could not be blamed for what happened with Al. No, that was squarely on the shoulders of Father Severus. How could he ever hope to be a decent father to the tadpole if the mother… father… carrier of his child was so frightened of Severus that he slipped into a catatonic state? "Inadvertently, I was rather rough with him when I told him to behave and I was the one that frightened him. You felt his magic, did you not?"

Nessie mutely nodded her head.

"We can't let that happen again. If anyone realizes that his magic is returning, the Dark Lord will be most displeased," Severus reminded her.

"Kind Master?" Nessie softly questioned. "Who was Al?"

"His name once was Albus Dumbledore. He was probably the most powerful wizard in all of creation, and now… now all that remains is a bloody empty shell."

"Al not empty," reminded the House Elf.

"Yes, I know. He's a bloody incubator. If he had any awareness of what the Dark Lord has done to him, he'd kill me," Severus somberly admitted.

_Somehow, I doubt that your blue eyes would be merrily twinkling with amusement, as you madly cackled about this latest oh so exciting experience, Headmaster. No, you'd be chasing me, and merrily kicking my arse with those pointy, high heeled boots of yours. If Merlin forbid, you ever caught me, Poppy would have to be called in to extricate your buckled boots from my bum._

"Al wouldn't kill Master. Nessie not let that happen. Nessie tells Al that Master was kind. Master didn't do innie outie with Al, and Master kept Al fed and clean. Al be glad that Master tooks good care of him." Nessie sagely nodded her head, as though detailing all those common courtesies to an enraged, violated Dumbeldore would be enough to keep the Headmaster from slaughtering Severus. Perhaps in Nessie's cold, hard existence that was so empty of small kindnesses, it would have been enough.

The House Elf certainly kept his life in perspective. No matter how horrific his life had been, Nessie had it far worse.

"What have ever I done right to deserve you, Nessie?"

It was a rhetorical question, but Nessie solemnly assured him that he deserved far better and that she'd strive harder to be the bestest House Elf that she could.

More guilt! How much could one wizard handle before he went absolutely barmy?

"Stay with Al, Nessie," Severus tersely ordered. "Don't answer the door unless it's the Dark Lord. Continue with Al's hand massages, his hands appear much better thanks to you. I'll be back in the late afternoon. I might call for you, and you'll need to leave Al for only a minute or two. I won't do it unless it's absolutely necessary, but if I call you, come quickly and _**quietly**_. Remember, you can not call Al by his name to anyone except for me, he will be called, 'Mistress'."

Nessie nodded her understanding, and she began to purr loudly. Al's breathing had slowed, and he seemed to be sleeping. Carefully, Severus brushed Al's hair out of his eyes, and then he placed his hand against Al's temple.

_I'm so sorry, Al._

* * *

Severus was having a cuppa, sitting in the main sitting room of the Dark Lord's Headquaters. He sardonically had nicknamed the Death Eaters HQ, the Maison des Meurtres. He was reading about last night's Rebellion escapades according to _The_ _Daily Prophet_ and it was a hard fought battle to maintain his outward composure, though inside, he was laughing. The widespread posting of the less than stellar scholarship of the new Ministry officials was a bloody stroke of genius. Seventy five Ministry officials listed; a grand total of 172 OWLS and 18 NEWTS between them all. Once again, Filius Flitwick had truly outdone himself as this latest expose was _**painful **_and_** embarrassing**_.

Truly, Filius Flitwick was a formidable and rather dangerous mage. There was no way in hell anyone would ever believe that gentle-hearted, mild mannered Filius Flitwick possessed anything more than pure thoughts of academia in his head, which was why he was the perfect saboteur. No, Filius watched and observed, and then, he quickly struck in an exceedingly painful, excessively embarrassing way.

The immediate response whenever Filius Flitwick induced sabotage had occurred?

Filius Flitwick? Never! He was utterly incapable of such stunts!

Even the bloody Headmaster refused to list Filius Flitwick as a possible suspect whenever a trick had been played on him.

No, no, no, it was always Peeves' fault even though an all too smug Filius was the only logical culprit.

While he was fondly reminiscing about the very dangerous, diminutive mage, Severus wondered if a surprisingly obtuse Minerva had ever realized how strongly Filius fancied her. Probably not, as Filius was too bashful to make his move. Couldn't truly blame the older mage, as that fear of the one you fancied laughing in your face after your heartfelt, sincere declaration of 'Fancy a shag?" was a wee bit overwhelming.

Merlin knew that horrible daydream besides acute performance anxiety had kept him from ever propositioning the Headmaster.

Lucius Malfoy stormed into the room, and the vexed platinum haired Malfoy was truly a sight to behold. His red face viciously clashed with his blue eyes and his snow white hair.

Severus, waiting in delighted anticipation for a vibrating Lucius Malfoy to spontaneously come apart at his seams, deliberately calmly perused the entire list of Death Eater's Hogwarts grades in the classified section of The _Daily Prophet_. Only Minerva and Filius had access to those moldering records and for added insult, they had even included Hogwarts' era pictures of the various Death Eaters. Bellatrix must be shrieking and foaming at the mouth considering her picture was one where she was unsuccessfully hiding her pimple infested face with both hands.

"_The Daily Prophet_ appears to have been compromised, as their current edition has numerous unauthorized editorial changes that took place after it was printed. I noticed that your grades weren't posted," snarked Lucius, who with his three NEWTS, appeared to be the proverbial genius among a ginormous cast of village idiots. "But then again, you would have had Top Marks except for that Evans bitch."

That Evans bitch, as Lucius had so succinctly summed her up, had been Severus' only friend, and while he truly loathed her taste in husbands and detested her spawn, he still didn't enjoy hearing her denigrated.

"LeStrange is still fornicating with your sheep?" Severus quipped. "I can't believe that they posted pictures of your sheep being sexually assaulted under 'Situations Wanted' in the classifieds. Bellatrix never mentioned that he was so well hung."

Severus narrowed his eyes at Lucius, and then added for good measure, "I'm assuming she tried him out once or twice before becoming hopelessly fixated on the Dark Lord?"

Lucius hissed. Malfoy was such a bloody prude sometimes, Severus thought. He had fathered over a dozen children thanks to the Dark Lord's breeding program and yet the proper Lucius was thoroughly embarrassed by so much as the mere mention of heterosexual sex. But yes, fornicating with animals was just reeked of absolute… desperation.

_Yes, all those child of yours arrived via the stork, Lucius. Thank Merlin, Cissy is more realistic. _

"Can you do _something_? There are a dozen mages taking liberties with my flock of Clun Forest sheep! Very well, it's _**funny**_, but you don't see me mocking you about Rita's interview with _your pregnant wife-to-be_."

Severus growled, and then he flipped toward Rita's column. "I must confess that I never read her column. Let me read her column first before I decide whether or not to help you."

Severus quickly scanned her column, expected the worse, and in fact it was far, far more horrific than he had feared. It made him seemed… devoted… doting… domesticated… oh the unspeakable horror of it all, for a confirmed gay-boy such as himself, Severus sounded so _**hopelessly heterosexual**_.

Worst than that, he sounded like a _**Bloody Breeder**_!

He put the paper down and disapprovingly glared at Lucius. "Prodigies of our couplings? _**Prodigies**_? Can I at least have the first child safely born before we send out birth announcements for the entire brood?"

That sounded close to the party line, as opposed Severus' more realistic attitude, "_He's 120 year old, how many babies does the Dark Lord expect Al to pop out before the effort kills him?_"

"Mr. Tall, Dark and Handsome, the bloody intellect, with his voice of melted dark chocolate, who is apparently planning on siring vast multiples of magical geniuses on Albus Dumbledore, is not amused?" Lucius mockingly cooed. "So tell me, Severus, how often are you riding your new pony? Do you get any sleep? I notice you have dark circles under your eyes. Perhaps, have you thought of asking Cissy for her opinion on Magical Makeup spells?"

"Thank you for your friendly concern with regards to my sex life. I can assure you that I top the old man frequently and fervently. I much prefer riding a stallion over molesting sheep," Severus retorted. "And Dumbledore is hung like a proverbial Centaur, and because of his lack of awareness, I can do any number of obscene things to him."

For good measure, Severus made a rather obscene gesture with his hand, and was rewarded by a terribly mortified Lucius Malfoy nervously swallowing.

"Seriously, Severus, my sheep? Can you rescue my sheep from the amorous advances of Thorfinn Rowle, please? As a bribe for your assistance, Cissy desires you come to dinner as she didn't a chance to speak with you last night. You can bring your stallion along with your fanatically, overly protective House Elf," Lucius purred. "I have to confess, I'm quite impressed with how well she's settled down with you as her Master. I wasn't sure if you had it in you to be a proper Master to a House Elf, considering your less than privileged upbringing. You must have beaten her near to death for her to finally behave. Bertha Rosier always had to use a firm hand with her, as Bertha believed her quite inept."

"Nessie fears my disapproval," Severus truthfully admitted.

"Excellent," Lucius calmly stated his approval. Then with the faintest hint of desperation, Lucius reminded him of far more important matters. "Now? My sheep?"

Alas, Lucius Malfoy's violated sheep were to remain molested and harassed, as a pimply faced boy ran into in the room.

"Sir, the Dark Lord is ordering you to London," he wearily gasped. The message delivered, he attempted to catch his breath.

"London?" Lucius Malfoy questioned. "Whatever for?"

"Not you, Sir. Sir," the boy said to Severus. "There's a burning Poenix over London. The Dark Lord wishes you to handle it immediately. Please hurry, Sir, as it took me some time to locate you."

"Your sheep will have to wait, as I must answer the Dark Lord's call," Severus tersely informed Lucius. "Try sprinkling Aconite in water, and let them drink it. It should kill their libido."

Hopefully, Lucius knew that the Aconite laced water was meant for the sheep.

* * *

Severus was greeted by a far too jovial **S**elwynn when he arrived at St. James' Park in London. The plump witch was nearly dancing in her enthusiasm, and he mentally sighed. Really, one would hope as the ruling Magical Class of all of the United Kingdom, Selwynn would have learned some decorum.

"I winged it!" Selwynn joyfully insisted. "It was flying overhead, and it was bloody burning, and I got it! It squawked and fell into the lake. Lots of smoke when it hit the water. See, you're not the only one that can handle a Phoenix."

Bloody hell, it sounded like Selwynn had actually managed to bring down an honest to Merlin Phoenix, which meant that Fawkes was either most likely dead or injured.

"Huzzah," Severus dryly retorted. "Now, are you planning on fishing your trophy out of the lake?"

"The lake?" questioned Selwynn. She was a rather flashily dressed witch who prided herself on always looking immaculate, and the thought that she would have search the lake for the Phoenix hadn't crossed her mind.

_No, she's expecting me to do it, and she'll take credit for the kill. _

"The lake," echoed Severus.

* * *

Severus often regretted his rash decision to join the Death Eaters, and there were times, like now, when he soundly cursed out the stupid lad he once had been. When he had foolishly dreamed of the respect he'd earn as an Infamous Dark Wizard, the accolades he would receive and the great deeds he would accomplish, the thought that he'd be reduced to scrimmaging around in bird cack and various pieces of foliage on Duck Island searching for a wounded Phoenix on a hot, muggy day had never once appeared in his fantasies.

He assumed that he was quite close to the wounded Fawkes, as two of the park's flamingos deliberately charged him with a sadistic single-mindedness that was positively unnatural. With a quick bit of wand work, Severus succeeded in Translocating them so Fawkes' fierce feathered fiends were on Selwynn's trail. One could almost pity the witch as her day had gone directly to hell and being viciously assaulted by two hot pink birds on stilts was probably the icing on her fairy cakes. Creating a park bench so to take a much needed breather, Severus took a deep breath and concentrated on Casting.

One was a message to Minerva requesting that she meet him in Stonehaven at two that afternoon. For good measure, he promised that he'd buy her a lunch of fish and chips with her requisite chippie sauce as that bribe would be sure to pique both her intellectual and gastronomical interest. The next casting was far more delicate, as Severus attempted to contact Fawkes.

_Fawkes? It's Severus. I'm still the Headmaster's man. I'm here to help you. Please don't send any more of your feathered friends to attack me_. _Truly, I desire only to help you._

While he knew that Phoenixes were natural born Legilimenists, he wasn't expecting a response from Fawkes. The proud Fawkes had never deigned to actually speak to Severus in spite of Severus' habitual greetings to the Phoenix during Severus' long tenure as Potion Masters at Hogwarts. It seemed that the maggot, Severus, wasn't noteworthy enough for the Phoenix to actually lower himself to acknowledge the Slytherin's courtesy. It was a matter of some displeasure to Severus that Fawkes had consented to "_talk"_ to Filius, Minerva, Pomona, Horace and even Rolanda Hooch on the rare occasion.

Well, the Phoenix was stuck dealing with him, Severus thought. All of Severus' betters were either dead or busy elsewhere, and Fawkes was left to deal with the maggot. That acidic thought was quickly banished to the back of the mind as bitterness wouldn't be conducive to convincing Fawkes to acknowledge him. He layered a fake cheer onto his mental tone, ignoring the icky feeling that he was sounding suspiciously like a male Dolores Umbridge.

_Fawkes? It's Severus Snape. Don't you want me to assist you? You need to let me know where you are! _

Silence.

_Fawkes? _

Silence.

_Bugger! Fawkes, it's a bloody choice between me and the deep, blue sea…err… lake… Yes, you don't particularly care for me, but at least I'm not planning on stuffing you and presenting you as a bloody trophy to the Bloody Dark Lord! Where the bloody hell are you hiding?_

There was a rustle of leaves, and a soft, plaintive chirp from the Phoenix. He carefully zeroed in on the source of the noise until he found the newly reborn Fawkes, hidden in plain sight in a flamingo's nest, complete with a fuzzy gray nest mate. It was a brilliant disguise as the Phoenix made no attempt to hide himself, as who in their right mind would expect a Phoenix to be residing in a flamingo's nest?

The wounded Fawkes looked much the worse for wear. His right wing was burnt, and he looked to be in terrible pain. His once proud scarlet plumage was now a dirty gray and his formerly bright eyes were dull and clouded. There was a whiff of something rank in the air, as it seemed Fawkes' injury had gone gammy. Well, maybe the smell was all the diverse varieties of bird cack Severus was sniffing.

Foolishly, recklessly, he grabbed the drowsy Fawkes, planning on leaving the nest before the Terrible Flamingos returned. For his heroic behavior, he earned a vicious peck on his hand by Fawkes' nest mate.

_Bugger, bugger, bugger! _

Somehow, he managed to defend himself from the baby flamingo, creatively curse all feathered fowl, remove his coat and then bundle Fawkes into it without Selwynn noticing.

_Keep quiet. I'm taking you some place safe._

Carefully, he closed his mind, not wanting the Phoenix to overhear his thoughts.

But where could he take Fawkes? He certainly couldn't take Fawkes back to his quarters or his lab at Head Quarters, as how would Fawkes react upon seeing the condition that Al was in? Would he attack Severus as the most likely culprit for Albus' condition? Most likely. Plus someone might barge into the lab and notice Fawkes.

Perhaps, it would be kinder for Fawkes and much safer for Severus to take the Phoenix to Spinners End for treatment.

Deliberately, he stormed to where Selwynn was standing.

"Ruddy-hell, I'm not wasting anymore of my time on searching for your bloody Phoenix that you bloody winged. I'm a Potions Master, not a bloody zoo keeper. Go find your own damn bird," Severus growled.

* * *

First things first, after his arrival at Spinners End, he rehydrated a feverish, parched Fawkes using an eyedropper. The inconsolable Phoenix looked like hell and he was in very poor physical shape, what with poor skin turgor and faded and missing plumage. The Headmaster would have been inconsolable to see his familiar in such heartbreaking condition.

"I will be meeting Minerva in two hours," Severus softly explained to Fawkes. "She'll take you back to Hogwarts, and you'll be safe there. What the bloody hell were you doing out in London in the broad daylight? That's a suicide wish if ever there was one. Do you think the Headmaster would approve of such stupidity? Well, what do you have to say about yourself, Fawkes?"

Bloody hell, he was talking to Fawkes like he expected the Phoenix to answer him. Truly, Severus had been dealing with Nessie and Al for far too long as he was regularly chatting with various souls who were unable or unwilling to converse with him. The Phoenix's eyes were tightly shut and he didn't react at all when Severus slathered antiseptic ointment onto the Phoenix's charred wing. His breathing was quite rapid; another sign of possible infection and fever, and Severus decided that it was necessary to dose a trembling Fawkes with willow bark.

His earlier annoyance toward Fawkes had quickly faded, as he had realized that the Phoenix had been so badly hurt by Selwynn that Fawkes had been unable to answer him.

"I know you miss him," Severus assured the Phoenix. "I do also…I truly do."

Fawkes responded to his confession with a soft, mournful whimper. If Severus' two sizes too small heart wasn't made of unbreakable stone, it would have shattered from the desolate sound. As it was, Severus had to admit that it chipped slightly.

"Ssssh, you need to rest. Poor, poor Fawkes, you must be so lonely without him. Don't you fret; Minerva will take good care of you."

To his astonishment, the Phoenix rubbed his head against Severus' fingers, and then gently nibbled at his index finger.

_Albus was conversing with Fawkes when Severus arrived for their meeting. The bird rubbed his head against the Headmaster's hand and then daintily nuzzled at Albus' fingers. The Headmaster cheerfully laughed and then he tenderly stroked the Phoenix' bright plumage. The ritual completed, the Phoenix then flew out the open window in order to give the two mages sufficient privacy for their meeting._

_"Fawkes was just being affectionate," the Headmaster cheerily explained. "I don't quite understand why Fawkes insists on nibbling on fingers. Perhaps, it's the closest to preening my feathers that he can manage. When we were newly bonded, Fawkes attempted to tidy my hair once. That was a truly emotionally traumatic moment, Severus, as I had to cut off a foot of my hair and my beard as his talons were completely ensnared in it. Since then, he's been content to merely nuzzle my fingers."_

Hesitantly, his fingers moving under their own volition, Severus attempted to tidy Fawkes' messy feathers, much like a Phoenix parent might comfort an ill nestling by preening and grooming them. His hesitant stroking seemed to soothe Fawkes as the Phoenix went to sleep.

"I'll need to put you in a box so I can give you to Minerva. I'll ensure that is quite comfortable for you," promised Severus. "For now, sleep, Fawkes."

* * *

"Gideon," Filius Flitwick called down the hallway. "Forgive me for bothering you, but I need to speak to you."

"Absolutely, Filius," Arthur Weasley assured him. He had escaped to his sixth floor hiding spot after receiving a not very subtle hint from Molly that he needed to stop plaguing her presence immediately.

"How's your wife feeling? I see you've been banished." Filius' mustache quirked and he sagely nodded his head. "Merry and I were never blessed with children so I can't understand what you're going through."

"She feels fine," Arthur calmly stated. "Muriel just loathes me at the moment."

"Oh my," the kindhearted Filius whispered, his blue eyes filled with gentle concern. "Is there anything I can do to soothe things over?"

Filius, while possibly being the smartest wizard ever to step foot in Hogwart's Hallowed Halls, was a complete babe in the woods when it came to the fairer sex. For this shocking lapse in the erudite Charms Master's education, one must blame Merry Flitwick. She much preferred her husband just the way he was, completely and utterly innocent in all matters of feminine nature. Arthur, being a very wise man and not wishing to have the death of Filius Flitwick weighing on his soul for all eternity, politely refuted Filius' sincere but rather naïve offer of assistance. When she was carrying, his wife had the quickest wand in the universe and she wasn't afraid to use it.

"Her bad mood will pass," he promised Filius. "May have already, in fact. But just in case it's left and decided to come back, I'm staying here until she tells me it's safe to return."

"Oh," Filius said. While he was ignorant in dealing with the fairer sex, he wasn't stupid. Then with a false cheerfulness, he asked Arthur if he wished to leave Hogwarts for a few hours. "Minerva's finally fallen asleep, and naturally, Severus now desires to meet with her. We can't have Severus show up and Minerva not be there, but she's in no condition to travel. There's also no way to contact Severus. I made the executive decision to go instead, and hopefully, he'll decide to speak with me. I'd like to have someone with me in case there is a hitch."

"I'll go," Arthur agreed. He was Order Member after all, and his forced 'retirement' due to his supposed death left him with far too unfilled hours on his hands. A man could only physically make love to his wife only so often after all, and Minerva hadn't yet been physically able to 'introduce' Gabriel and Muriel to the other Order members. "Where are we going?"

"Stonehaven."

"Where's that?" Arthur questioned.

"Scotland. By the way, do you like fish and chips? Seems Severus is planning on buying Minerva fish and chips with chippie sauce."

"Chippie sauce?" repeated Arthur. "Don't you want chippie sauce, Filius?"

"It's a bloody Edinburgher thing. I'm a purist, I prefer salt and vinegar, but Severus has promised Minerva chippie sauce," Filius unhelpfully explained. "I'll be Glamouring as a young boy, Stephen, and you'll be my Tad."

"I'm to be your father, Filius?" Arthur found that quite funny, and he laughed.

"I could Glamour as a full sized adult, but I'll still physically move like I do now. It'll be noticeable that I don't move like you. Come to my quarters in thirty minutes and we'll Disapparate from there."

* * *

Severus found a suitable box, and put one of his shirts into it. He Transformed it into the softest silk, so it would be a comfy nest for the wounded Fawkes. That accomplished, Severus carefully transferred Fawkes from the countertop into the box.

"Don't you panic; I'm wrapping your box up so it seems to be a birthday present. If I just hand over a box to Minerva, people will wonder, but a birthday gift? You'll be able to breathe just fine, but perhaps, it might be a good idea to take a nap," Severus suggested to Fawkes.

Fawkes blinked his eyes once in acknowledgement, and then burrowed into the soft silk.

"I'll warn you before I Disapparate," Severus assured the Phoenix.

No response from the Phoenix, but Severus was quite familiar with Fawke's verbosity. Gently, he closed the box and then Severus carefully wrapped it in green wrapping. paper That done, he carefully cast a Glamour to hide his features. Hopefully, he'd recognize Min at the Chippy shop.

"We're going," he tersely informed Fawkes.

Within minutes, Severus found himself in Stonehaven. He felt quite the nutter when he entered the Chippy shop and he was the only person there besides the counter girl. Bloody hell, Minerva had stood him up!

Well, perhaps he should be charitable; maybe she was running late, as being a Feared Rebel Leader was no doubt an all consuming job. He ordered his lunch, and then took a seat at one of the cleaner tables, pretending to browse a newspaper that had been left on the table while he ate his fish and chips.

The door to the shop opened, and out of the corner of his eye, he realized that the newest customers were most assuredly not Minerva. For one thing, there were two of them and both were male. One was a tall man and a small boy who was carefully holding onto the man's hand. The father had short, coarse salt and pepper hair with a neat beard to match, and the two of them placed their orders.

Then to his annoyance, they sat at his table.

What? Wasn't there a vast multitude of empty tables from which to choose? Severus glared at them, and the boy warningly wagged his hand at Severus. The boy was wearing a small ring on his right hand, and when Severus glanced at the boy's hand for a closer look, it had disappeared. Severus _**knew**_ that ring, as it was Filius Flitwick's Championship Ring from his dueling days. The Charms Master had only worn it when he instructed the Dueling Club and Severus had seen it when he was a student.

Severus made a quick, fluid motion with his hands. Someone who didn't know what Severus had done would have assumed that he was reaching for more serviettes. Instead, the small boy made a matching gesture which identified him in turn as a Hogwarts House Head, while the man next to him continued to munch on his chips.

"Mum sends her regrets," the boy told him in a piping, high voice. "She has a bad headache, and couldn't travel."

"That's regrettable, as I have a birthday present for her," Severus replied. He tilted his head toward the cloth bag that held the box. He flickered his eyes toward the man, and then toward Filius.

The boy was wiping his mouth with his serviette, carefully obscuring his lips from view as he mouthed, "_Arthur_".

Bloody hell, he had wanted to speak with Minerva, and instead he had gotten Filius Flitwick and Arthur Weasley!

_Fawkes, don't panic. It's Filius Flitwick and Arthur Weasley. You can trust them. _

"Stephen wanted to see his uncle so badly that when Min had her migraine, that we decided that we didn't wish to disappoint him," Arthur said in a voice that could only be described as a _basso profundo_. Merlin's scrote, he didn't even sound like Arthur Weasley, and he certainly didn't look anything like the balding, ginger haired Arthur. In anything, Severus would admit that Arthur's current physical features made him immensely shaggable, especially if his equipment had stayed its impressive size.

Mentally, he chastised himself for thinking such lewd thoughts. Yes, it had been far too long since he had so much as a quick nocturnal wrestling match, but he was espoused now, a child on the way plus that entire quadruple agent bit made things far too complicated for quick trip to Knockturn Alley.

"You look a great deal better than when I last saw you," Severus dryly stated.

"I must wholeheartedly agree," Arthur easily stated. "So does my wife. I thank you for your concern."

They made small talk until they finished their fish and chips, and then they left the shop together.

"Where do you suggest that we can talk?" Arthur questioned in a very soft tone.

"Tad? Can we please see Dunnottar Castle?" Filius pleaded, sounding so much like a cheeky monkey that Severus had to look twice. "You promised that we'd see the castle!"

Yes, Dunnottar Castle was perfect. It was quite secluded and the way the weather was, it was unlikely to have many visitors.

"It might wear him out," Severus agreed. "We'll take the hiking route that way you can see the ocean. The view is impressive."

"Uncle, carry me!" Filius whinged. "My legs are small!" He held up his arms for Severus.

"Mind your manners, Stephen," Arthur snapped, sounding a great deal like a harried father. "Why don't you carry him? You need the practice, and my back's a bit dodgy."

"Please?" Filius pleadingly requested, before again reminding Severus, "My legs are small!"

"Would you mind carrying my birthday present for Min?" Severus requested Arthur. "It's quite fragile."

* * *

"Sorry I'm so bloody hard to tote," Filius whispered in his ear. "Can't do much about my physical size, but I've reduced my mass. I simply can't run after you two long legged souls for long. Besides, I need to talk to you. Minerva's migraines have returned with a vengeance because of all the stress she's under. Poppy fears that if we don't get them under better control, she'll have a brain storm. There's a new potion treatments for migraines, Severus. If I gave you instructions detailing the potions, could you make them? We need fresh supplies, and our fresh supplies are rather limited."

Severus shifted Filius' small frame once more. While Filius only weighed mere ounces, he was a handful to carry.

"Yes, I will do what I can," assured Severus. "I know how crippling her migraines are."

"Thank you," Filius softly stated. "You can't imagine what it's like to see someone so vibrant reduced to whimpering in pain..."

Why yes, Filius, I can imagine that horrific site quite well, Severus sadly thought.

"When are you going to admit to Minerva that you fancy her?" softly whispered Severus. He didn't speak loud enough for Arthur to hear, but damn it, there was a war going on, what the hell was Filius waiting for? Angels descending from the realms of glory with a suitable trumpet fanfare to announce, Min, I'd bloody like to shag you?

"Merlin's bloody 'nads, you know?" protested Filius.

Filius never cursed. He was ever even tempered and mellow. Nothing ever fazed the Charms Master, even when someone, a rabid mutt by the name of Sirius, had set Filius on fire during Severus' first year's Charm class.  
"Language, young Stephen, watch your bloody language, or I'll watch it for you," growled Severus. "But in answer to your question, I've known for years. It was always the little things you did for her that showed me how much you cared. For example, you always made sure she had Brodies' loose leaf tea during our House meetings. I always believed that she'd be quite willing to entertain the notion but that you needed to grab your courage and ask the witch. Don't be embarrassed, I wholeheartedly approve!"

"Sorry, I just believed that I had hidden it better," Filius admitted. "She's now quite aware of my feelings for her, and to my absolute heartfelt relief, she didn't laugh."

"Why would she snicker?" Severus questioned.

"I am a wee bit shorter than she is, Severus," admitted the rather embarrassed Charms Master.

Severus stopped dead on the trail, as that tidbit surprised him.

"I've never thought of you as lacking in physical stature, Filius. I mean, you're twice the mage I am," Severus earnestly confessed. "Your intellect is towering; your skill with your wand is unparalleled. You are the only living, retired and undefeated Dueling Champion. So you're a little bit on the short side, it's not like you've got that damn devil's tattoo on your left arm and on your soul. Let me assure you that truly crimps your romantic possibilities."

The bitterness in Severus' voice surprised himself. Severus continued to carry Filius in silence, refusing to further converse with Filius until he had regained his composure.

Where the bloody hell had THAT thought lurked?

"Let's stop here," Severus suggested after reaching a scene overlook after a fifteen minute climb. "We can enjoy the view here while Stephen does whatever young boys do."

"Brought my Gameboy!" Filius assured him, before he climbed onto the bench next to Severus. He began playing with something small that squawked and hissed, and for good measure, Filius wiggled his feet. Filius was the very picture of a bored young snot. Severus stared at Filius' noisy box and he recognized it as something Filius had confiscated from a first year Muggle student. It was a computer game?

Arthur sat down on the other side of Filius, and he pretended to look at the scenery.

"Safe to talk?" Arthur questioned.

Filius nodded his head, even as he continued to play with his infernal contraption. "No one can see us, and no one can get within a thousand yards of us without me knowing."

"Arthur? Minerva informed me that you've agreed to raise my child if anything should happen to me. I'll be able to give you a stipend, and there will be a House Elf to assist Molly. I'd like to reintroduce you to Nessie. Filius? She claims that she'll be able to locate someone by Smell, even if they're in an Unplottable location. Is that claim true? I know very little about House Elves," admitted Severus.

There was a loud blare of noise from Filius' Gameboy and then Filius pouted as it appeared that he had lost.

"If you're ordering her to find Arthur, and she's determined to do so, yes, she'll be able to find him," Filius softly stated. "She won't be able to see or even enter Hogwarts, but we'll know that she's there waiting for Arthur."

"She'll have the child with her, so it's crucial that you let her into Hogwarts," Severus explained. "If I am killed, she will be a Freed House Elf, Arthur. She's agreed to work for you and Molly, and she'll be paid a reasonable fee."

"Severus, I hate to say this, but I'm not the Weasley who is overflowing in Galleons," Arthur reminded him. "That's Fred and George."

"I know how your finances are; I have the money set aside for you. I'm going to call her here, is that fine with you?" Severus questioned.

When both men agreed, Severus softly called his House Elf. With a soft pop, Nessie appeared, and she immediately attached herself to Severus.

"Master calls Nessie?" The House Elf asked. "Mistress is still sleeping."

"Yes, I called for you. I told you that you were to meet someone. She was ill and unable to make our meeting. Therefore, you'll be meeting someone else. You've already met Arthur, and you need to meet Filius. Come here, let me introduce you."

Nessie peered at the two men, and then whispered something to Severus.

"Yes, I know they're wearing Glamours, and yes, Arthur is the man I supposedly killed," Severus assured his House Elf. "As you can tell, he's still among the land of the living. You just need to Smell them in order to find them, correct?"

The House Elf nodded her head, and then peered again at the two men.

"You've met Arthur already. He and his wife, Molly, have agreed to raise my son if anything happens to me. They'll need your help, as they'll have their own little one to raise."

Nessie nodded her head, and then she carefully sniffed Arthur's outstretched hands.

"Nessie likes babies. Nessie bathes and cleans babies nicely," the House Elf quietly assured Weasley. "Nessie cooks and cleans house also. Nessie can sews, knits and crochet. Arthur will be happy to have Nessie."

Then she looked at Filius and Filius gently smiled at her. The Charms Master held out his hands for her to sniff.

"What lovely brown eyes you have, my dear," Filius assured the House Elf who blushed at the compliment. Then his eyes narrowed as he looked at her disfigured ear. "But whatever happened to your pretty ears?"

Nessie flushed, vainly attempted to hide her damaged ear with her hand, and softly muttered, "Nessie slow and stupid. Mistress wanted Nessie to be better."

"Her former Mistress,' Severus smoothly inserted. "Nessie's current Mistress is quite fond of her and would never raise a hand against her. Nessie takes very good care of her Mistress."

"Nessie loves Mistress," she strongly insisted.

"Now, Nessie, you need to return back to your Mistress," inserted Severus. "I'll be home soon."

With a silent pop, Nessie disappeared.

"That poor Elf," Filius whispered. "To deliberately burn her ear is nothing less than malicious spitefulness. How long have you had her?"

"I was given her a few months after Hogwarts fell," Severus explained. "One of the Dark Lord's foremost followers owned her, and after her death, I was given her."

"That might explain it then," Filius muttered.

"Explain what?" Severus questioned. He felt uneasy, as Filius sounded like a birddog on the scent of a pheasant. Filius was too damn smart; what thoughts had he put together?

"Albus' portrait. It's not acting like a regular portrait, as he does nothing but scream. Then sometimes, his clothes change, as though someone is dressing him, but the strangest part is that Albus cuddles a House Elf doll with a chewed ear. If Albus had seen Nessie and her rather distinctive ear that could explain the portrait. Perhaps Albus' portrait is reliving his death, and Nessie might have been there."

"Unfortunately, many of the Dark Lord's followers do not treat their House Elves kindly. Many of the House Elves have notches or slices in their ears, and there are a few that are missing chunks of their ear," Severus smoothly lied. Well, it wasn't a complete lie, but merely a slight spin on the truth. "Nessie is a rather sensitive soul, and I don't believe that she would be able to witness something like traumatic without adverse affect. For our first few weeks together, she actually wept for her deceased Mistress."

"I'll treat her kindly," Arthur assured Severus. "Though I'm not planning on having her join my family as I expect you to live through this."

"Thank you, it is reassuring to know that my son and Nessie will not be abandoned."

Now, it was time to put Filius off the scent. If there was anyone Severus would dare trust with helping him research the Headmaster's condition, it would have been Filius. But since Filius and Minerva were becoming closer, he couldn't have the Gryffindor involved. She'd kill him first and then ask questions.

"Filius, I don't know what exactly happened to Albus," Severus assured Filius. It was the truth, though he had his suspicions. Damn it, he couldn't ask Filius for the damn book, as the Charms Master would be too likely to put everything together. "I found a gravely injured Fawkes today. He was witnessed in London in broad daylight, and he was attacked. His grief for Albus has caused his mind to go astray!"

For that tasty tidbit, he was greeted with shocked silence.

"He's in the package. I've medicated him as best as I could, but he'll need Grubby-Plank's medical assistance. Under no condition, do you give him to Hagrid to treat. Do you have information on that potion therapy? I'll see what I can do."

His offer of assistance was gratefully accepted by Filius, and Severus was given the information on the potions.

"I'll be in contact," Severus assured them. "I'll see you when I see you."

Quietly, all three men Disapparated from the location, unseen by anyon_e. _


	13. Chapter 13

Disclaimer #1 - Not my Characters.

Disclaimer # 2 - AU, Dark Fic, pregnancy, Mpreg.

A/N # 1 – More than a wee smidgeon of MM/FF.

A/N # 2 – Much thanks to MyMadness for her help. NW2A can highly recommend her fic, "This Old Heart" available at your local fanfictiondotnet location.

A/N # 3 - Err... yeah... I accidentally called Gideon Gabriel and only one person commented, so she gets a prize!

* * *

Severus returned home and found Al asleep in bed. Nes was sitting next to him on the bed and she was crooning softly while she tenderly stroked her charge's hair.

"Is he any better?" Severus softly questioned.

"Al woked, cried then sleeps," she quietly whispered. "Al scared."

"Does he seem… normal?" Severus asked and then realized the ineffectiveness of asking that particular question. "Is he acting normal for Al? Aware of his surroundings?"

"No, Al not knows where he is," Nessie softly replied. "Al not know Nessie. Al scared. Al seems happy when Nessie croons to him."

"Very well, please stay with him," Severus decided. "I need to work on a few potions."

* * *

Working on Minerva's Migraine Potion was a welcome distraction from the problem of Al for Severus. Brewing had often provided a type of solace during his years as a student then as a professor at Hogwarts, and now was no different.

"I could easily improve this," he announced to his empty lab. "I'll do two potions, the standard one and one that I've modified and Poppy can test it. It really isn't necessary for them to have fresh supplies; no doubt Hodges decided to use them in his potion so to increase his profit. I'll make a few suggestions for replacement ingredients."

He cut, chopped, diced and minced, simmered, boiled and strained, and then, after a few hours he poured the two potions into a filtration system. It was necessary for filtrate the substrate from the medicine, and it would have to refiltrated over the next few days. Only then would the medication be ready for Minerva's use.

The medication poured, Severus decided it was long past time for him to start reading. He went to his library, directly to the pile of books that Minerva had acquired for him, and closing his eyes, he randomly chose one of the books. Opening them, he discovered he had pulled, "My Boys Can Swim! (The Daft Bugger's Guide to Surviving Your Wife's Pregnancy)". It had a bright, garish cover, and Severus debated putting it back into the pile.

No, times like this, he needed to be strong, and that meant reading every single book that Minerva had deemed appropriate for Dense, Utterly Clueless, Senseless Severus. By the fourth chapter detailing the changes that Al should be experiencing in his sixth week, a rather squeamish Severus realized he was most assuredly in over his head.

"Bloody hell, Al will need a brassiere?"

Merlin's black lacy unmentionables, if Albus Dumbledore's mind ever returned from the vacant vacationland that from which it had strayed, and the Headmaster found himself sporting a silky, lacy bra, he'd bloody kill Severus. Bloody, bloody hell, why did Molly Weasley willingly go through this nightmarish experience seven times?

Ah, fortunately the Pregnancy Bible for Daft Prats answered that as well.

"Despite every misgiving, fear and discomfort, your wife will likely want to get pregnant again. This is caused by the new baby hormones that will kick in after the birth."

Merlin, he was learning a great deal. Hormones were apparently another word for insanity.

"Al better not want another one!"

* * *

Severus had devoured three books and was working on his fourth when Al shuffled into the room, followed by a hovering Nessie.

"Master? Nessie need to make dinner, and Al wake," she explained. "Al now knows Nessie."

"Very well, Al can sit next to me," Severus magnanimously offered.

"Al likes to be reading to," the House Elf helpfully suggested.

"Very well, I'll read to Al," agreed Severus. "I'm sure he'll be very interested in the subject matter."

So Al was positioned next to Severus in the two-seater, and Severus began to read after he placed a chokie in Al's mouth. He spoke in dramatic tones, adding suitable commentary as necessary, and a spellbound Al stared at him.

"Amazing! You are six weeks pregnant. At this point in your pregnancy, you and your husband… partner… well… _**me**_… may still be adjusting to the mind-boggling, alternative reality that in less than a year, you will be a new mommy… err… Al, I think for the poor child's sanity, it will be necessary to classify you as Papa, as your pride and joy is too stonking big for you to be misclassified as a female. As this month progresses, you may start experiencing more symptoms such as increasing nausea and breast tenderness. Al, that does not mean that you're given de facto permission to vomit more. I trust you understand that. Our baby's heart is also now beating regularly."

Severus continued to read in a suitably animated tone, and Al grew drowsy.

"Yes, fatigue is quite normal during the first trimester, as Papa is busy growing a baby," Severus assured Al. "Also, a little spotting can be considered completely normal. I am really starting to **_loathe _**that word."

Severus shuddered and quickly glanced at Al's nether region. "Let's not do the spotting thing, eh, Al? I believe that it's perfectly acceptable to miss that part of the experience."

If Albus Dumbledore ever returned from his idyllic vacation in the _sídhe_, the odds that he'd want to murder Severus were steadily increasing. After going through all this, Severus was more than willing to let him be successful, and yes, the Book even mentioned the high probability of spousal murder.

It was with a devilish sense of the glee that the Book dutifully informed him, _"_Many husbands would rather die than face their wives in the labour and delivery suite. Even the most genteel, refined woman has been known to threaten her husband with imminent castration while in the agonizing throes of labor. When this happens, do not patronize the mother-to-be. Instead, quickly agree with every insult and curse word she directs at you. After your baby is born, your wife will no doubt apologize for her bad conduct, and it's highly recommended that you sincerely claim not to have noticed any abnormal behavior on her part._"_

Glancing at the book's title page, it was as he secretly expected. This particular book was written by a woman. There was a cheerful vindictiveness in its tone that could be only explained away by the fact that she had delivered three sets of quads and two sets of quints and hated all men.

With a false cheerfulness that he didn't possess, Severus assured Al that everything was normal.

"See, Al, everything's going splendidly in your tummy."

He turned his head to see that there was a one hundred and twenty year old man-child drooling on his shoulder, and Severus knew that the misleading term "normal" had in no way described his life in years. Bloody hell, why should it now? Really, his life was pretty much like that of a pregnant woman… PERSON… as best as he could see. When else could experiencing this many abnormal things be cheerfully classified as _**normal**_?

Al nestled closer to him, and he rested his head on Severus' shoulder. Hesitantly, Severus put his arm around Al, and Severus was rewarded with a sleepy smile. It seemed that Al had forgiven him, and Severus' hard heart, which was two sizes too small, melted but only _**slightly**_. He did have his strict standards that he struggled to maintain.

"I know; you desire me to skip to the end, don't you? You always read the end of your novels first to decide if they were worth the time to read," Severus gently teased. "Very well, let us move on to month nine. The chapter includes topics such as understanding the bloody show, labor pains and what happens when your water breaks. Let's skip that, as you're having a caesarean, shall we? And let's focus on the baby!" Severus said, trying to sound excited and enthused. Al seemed to respond well to him when he used a happy, clappy voice."Al, let us discuss developmental milestones for young Salazar."

He flipped through the chapters, landing on the important development milestone of "Recognizes self in mirror" and thought, "Bloody Hell. How can Al have this baby when he doesn't even recognize himself in the mirror?"

"Next chapter," Severus stated with somewhat less enthusiasm.

Next chapter was "Age 16 months" where one of the key developments was that the baby becomes attached to a soft toy or object. Glancing at the doorway beyond, he saw Nessie, who apparently was Al's soft object of choice. He continued reading, and his stomach lurched at the jovial description of a sixteen month old as "Having temper tantrums when frustrated, angry or fearful." Well, that certainly inadequately described the incident at Maison-forte de Malfoy.

No longer could Severus focus his concerns about milestones onto the coming baby, he thought. The most powerful wizard of our time was currently developmentally sixteen months old at the most. And he was responsible for him. Merlin's scrote, Severus knew he had gone astray in his head, as this was farce was becoming almost comical. It was with a dawning sense of horror that he forced himself to continue reading.

"Eighteen months, you or the baby should be able to scribble well. Would you like me to pick up some crayons for you? And I'm sure you are looking forward to twenty month, as you 'may start exploring your privates and take an interest in playing with others.' A word to the wise, Al. Try to keep these two separate until you are in a committed relationship, else you'll end up with your heart broken. At the stage of two years old, we have the continual usage of the word 'Why'! When you hit this stage, Al and start pondering about why, why, why did this happen to you, this will be when you throw a tantrum and attempt to kill me."

He closed the book, and sighed.

This was absurd. Al wasn't meeting completely meeting any of the developmental goals for any age. Al had happily frotted Severus, thrown a major magical eppy or two, had quickly adopted Nessie as his personal security blanket and yet, he couldn't feed himself, wouldn't recognize himself in a mirror and made mewling noises.

"It would be nice if we could just get to the point where you could feed yourself, Al. Perhaps, Nessie should work on that with you?"

Al said not a word, but instead snuggled closer to Severus. Therefore, Severus once more began reading from the book.

"Once you start taking an interest in the world around you, it's suggested that you should go to the zoo and other exciting areas for new experiences. It's a bloody shame that I don't know any other hundred year old wizards so we could set up a proper playdate. Filius is the closest one to your age, but he's rather busy playing house with Minerva," Severus snarked. "About bloody time, I might add, but particularly obtuse in matters of romance is our dear Minerva."

"Mmmmn," Al softly muttered.

"Min-er-va," Severus distinctly and slowly stated. He had no idea why he was wasting the effort, but he needed to practice.

"Mmmna," repeated a drowsy Al, who yawned once and closed his eyes. His breathing slowed and he was soon slumbering.

Being quite careful not to disturb him, Severus continued to flip through the various chapters. He was an instructor, ok; a former instructor at a boarding school and Al was probably the ideal student. The Dark Lord had damaged the Headmaster's mind, but his native intellect, the spark that was Albus Dumbledore… it was still intact. After all, hadn't Al made significant cognitive improvements in the brief time that Nessie had been reading to him? Better eye contact for one thing, Al now knew his name and most importantly, Al comprehended that all important word '**NO**'.

And Al had just made a noble effort to say Minerva's name. Yes, there had been that mind-boggling moment when Al had demanded to know what Severus had done to him, but that was the only time Al had truly spoken. Since then, Al had cooed, grunted, squealed and whined, but he hadn't spoken.

If there was only another way for them to communicate so that only the three of them could understand each other.

Wait… there was another book that Minerva had thrown in. It had been heavily discounted, but Minerva had wanted to helpfully return his favor of placing the hot, smutty, lewd and immoral "Menaced and Manacled by Mermen" into her smut basket. What had been the name of the book?

Yes, "Sign Language for Babies".

The book was located and thoroughly devoured. Nessie was an extremely intelligent House Elf, and the gestures were simple, though he briefly wondered if Al's crippled hands were dexterous enough. But then, really, how dexterous were babies anyway? The ones he had seen were always flailing about, doing nothing more than cooing and pooping, just this book claimed that babies could sign.

Carefully and deliberately, Severus practiced severa signs as it would be quite helpful to have a rudimentary method of communications with Albus. "Auntie" would mean Nessie, "Husband" would be Severus… and yes, "stomachache" could be right useful. Later, he would take the Headmaster's hands in his and gently shape them in the sign for "more". He would then tell Al that the gesture meant more. In time, Al would learn how to sign for more food, though Severus accepted the fact that Al's first signing would be "more Auntie".

* * *

Filius and Arthur snuck back into Hogwarts, but they were greeted by the long arm of the law. Judge Minerva and Jury Members Molly and Remus were anxiously waiting for them. In absentia, the two escapees had been tried and convicted by a court of their peers.

"Gabriel, no note!" Molly growled at her husband. She had her arms crossed over her belly, and her glare would have done a basilisk proud. "I was worried sick about you!"

Minerva's countenance looked thin, grey and worried and she wearily shook her head.

"I'm not particularly chuffed with your recklessness, Filius. Are you mad as a box of Chocolate frogs?" Minerva softly questioned. "I expected _**more**_ from you."

Filius' cheerful grin slightly faded at Minerva's rebuke and a saddened Remus knew that Minerva had scored on the sensitive Charms Master.

"Minerva, don't push him away!" Remus thought. "You need him."

"Gideon and I needed to leave Hogwarts for a bit. Once you find out what happened, you might decide to pardon us, but for now, we need to talk, but not here. Your quarters, Min," Filius softly commanded. "Plus, we have need of Wilhelmina Grubbly-Plank as I have a patient for her. Gideon is holding something rather dear to us. One might even say that it's rather _**familiar**_ looking."

The quintet returned to Minerva's quarters, where Arthur and Filius commandeered Minerva's long table. Arthur put the bag on the table, and then he removed the brightly wrapped package.

"Minerva, go ahead, open it," Filius instructed. "It's from Severus. He requested a meeting, and you were in no condition to meet him. Don't give me any backtalk, Minerva; you know that Arthur and I were the only likely candidates that Severus might trust. For obvious reasons, Remus and Molly weren't options."

"You may want to sit down, Minerva," Arthur helpfully suggested.

Naturally, the Gryffindor Lioness refused to show any weakness, not in front of anyone and certainly not in front of Filius. Proudly, she stood as she carefully opened the package. It was only after she opened the package and found an ailing Fawkes that her considerable stamina and her knees gave out. Fortunately, an always thoughtful Filius flicked and swished a chair into position, so Minerva didn't suffer the indignity of falling on her arse.

"Fawkes?" She softly whispered. Hesitantly, she held out her hand, and the Phoenix gently nibbled at her fingers. "Could this miracle possibly confirm that Albus is still alive? How ever did Severus find him?"

"He was flying in London, and one of the Death Eaters winged him. Severus found him, and thought it best if Fawkes was returned to you," Arthur explained.

"I'll get Wilhelmina," Remus quickly offered. Within minutes, he returned from Minerva's floo with Wilhelmina and Poppy in tow.

Grubbly-Plank was a brisk, down-to-earth woman, but she gently cooed at Fawkes while she carefully inspected him. She shook her head in disapproval when she saw his injured wing, carefully and deliberately extended it as far as Fawkes would let her and then she examined his eyes, beak and throat.

"Someone did some excellent first aid on him," she grudgingly admitted after a long, through examination. "I can do better though, so don't you worry, he'll be right as rain in a few weeks. Would you mind if I suggested that he stayed here? The familiar surroundings would do him well, as he's deeply traumatized. The wound has gone gammy, and he's shocky and grieving to boot."

Wilhelmina took Minerva's assent as a given, as she walked off without so much as a by-your-leave. Instead, she walked over to where Albus' hat was sitting on the shelf, and she picked it up. Returning back to the table, she placed it next to Fawkes. The Phoenix stretched his neck so he could rest his head on the hat, and he crooned a soft, appreciative thank you.

"Poor little thing," Wilhelmina cooed. "Keep the hat next to him, and do you by chance have any of Albus' old robes? If you could give him one, he'll make a nest with it. Don't let him roost on a perch as his wing is in no shape for such nonsense. He needs to rest and keep off that wing! I'll be back with a poultice and assorted medication."

The witch left, and then Poppy sighed.

"Whirlwind Wilhelmina," she quipped. "Don't worry; she'll keep her mouth shut regarding this."

"I actually do have some of Albus' robes. I just couldn't get rid of all of them," Minerva admitted. "I can put him what used to be Albus' library, so he can peacefully rest and look out the window. Do you think Fawkes would like Albus' portrait in the room?"

Fawkes chirped and gave Minerva a plaintive, hopeful look. It would take a far harder heart than Minerva's to deny Fawkes that small comfort.

"I'll get it and bring it here," Poppy decided. "Be back in a minute or so."

* * *

Fawkes was gently carried to a window ledge where he was given the choice of several robes from which to pick. He took his time, sniffing each one and finally deciding on a lavender-colored robe as it smelled the strongest of his mage's scent. Then Flitwick carefully shaped it into suitable Phoenix nest and Fawkes crawled into it. His injured wing was carefully supported with a soft pillow, and he gratefully closed his eyes. There was a bustle of noise, as his loyal retainers were busy acquiring his Phoenixy necessities such as his water bowl, his feeding station and his assorted toys from wherever they had been put away.

"It's a good thing you kept all this," Remus softly informed Minerva.

"I just couldn't get rid of everything," she quietly admitted with a dry laugh. "I thought I was just being a sentimental bint."

"Does this mean that Albus is still alive?" Filius softly questioned.

"It doesn't really matter, Filius." Minerva brusquely insisted. "Unless Albus returns waving Godric Gryffindor's sword like King Arthur in one hand and in his other hand, he's holding his wand, then whether or not Albus is alive doesn't really matter."

"It _**does**_ matter, Minerva," protested Filius. "Because Fawkes shouldn't be here, but he is. The question is; did Albus want Fawkes to give us information, something to help us with this war? I sincerely wish Fawkes could speak, because Phoenixes are lifebonded to one unique mage. Normally, if Albus was dead, Fawkes would have combusted, unless… Albus transferred their bond to another or instructed him otherwise. Minerva, you're the most likely candidate. Do you feel any… special understanding… perhaps a kinship with Fawkes?"

Minerva tilted her head and closed her eyes, not wanting to see the burgeoning hope in their eyes. She intently concentrated for a bit, while everyone expectantly waited and then she shook her head.

"No," Minerva tiredly confessed, her eyes still closed as she couldn't bear to see the abject disappointment in her supporters' eyes. Fawkes was still alive so it had to mean something. Why couldn't she realize what the significance was? Merlin's robe, she was just so tired and her head hurt. "I'm truly sorry but I don't."

The witch sat down in her chair, and she rubbed her aching head.

"Would you mind leaving? My head is beginning to ache." It was a politely voiced request but it was nevertheless, still an order, and everyone quickly left except for Filius.

"Min? Are you alright?" His voice was full of a gentle, loving concern, and he was rewarded with an abrupt nod of her head. "Very well, if you need me, contact me."

Again, the abrupt nod of her head, and Filius left Minerva's quarters. He was met in the hallway by a very concerned Arthur, Molly and Remus.

"Minerva?" Remus softly questioned.

"I think seeing Fawkes had made her finally realize that there's no way Albus escaped from He Who Must Not Be Named," Filius explained. "Albus would never let Fawkes get to that deplorable state. I fear that slight hope was what had kept Minerva fighting."

"She just can't give up," Molly protested. "We need her, as there's no one else to which everyone will listen. Even Sirius respects her!"

"She won't give up, don't you fear, Muriel. Minerva will hold onto crumbling edge of defiance with the very last bit of her strength. Our dear Min is just very weary, and I fear that she hasn't given herself permission to mourn for Albus," Filius explained.

In Minerva's quarters, Fawkes softly sighed and closed his eyes. He needed to quickly regain his strength so he could once more keep a protective eye on his severed mage. Most assuredly, his mage had instructed him _**not**_ to return to Hogwarts, but yet, when Fawkes had agreed to Albus' desperate plan, he hadn't guessed at the extent of his painful separation from his mage.

Yes, four parts of Albus' shattered whole were now in the same location. His wand had been carefully secreted away in the Sorting Hat where it was safe from the misuse by the wrong hands; Albus' magical essence was safely contained in his portrait and Fawkes as Albus' familiar, carried Albus' shattered soul and intellect as a silent passenger in his mind. All Fawkes needed to reconstitute his mage was transport his physical body here.

And Fawkes had sworn a binding oath not to do so until Voldemort was dead.

When Minerva McGonagall allowed herself the rare luxury of bitter tears, Fawkes gently crooned.


	14. Chapter 14

Disclaimer #1 - Not my Characters.

Disclaimer # 2 - AU, Dark Fic, pregnancy, Mpreg.

A/N# 1 – Much thanks to MyMadness for her helpful suggestions. NW2A can highly recommend her fic, "This Old Heart" available at your local fanfictiondotnet location.

* * *

The next day, Severus returned home to his little family, burdened down with assorted presents for the little mom to be and Nessie.

"Nessie, since I'm to be a father in a few short months, I thought I should start practicing with Al," he informed the dubious House Elf who appeared quite alarmed at the sheer amount of packages that he had acquired. Well, yes, perhaps Severus had gone slightly overboard in his zeal, but if a man couldn't extravagantly indulge his family, who could he? Al, naturally, said not a word, his blue eyes vacant. "I purchased building blocks, crayons, more books…a ball…"

Al's blues eyes brightened and there was a slight smile on his face when he saw the brightly colored ball. It had swirls and whirls, glitter and shimmer, sparkle and shine. There were even little stars and moons sprinkled over the ball in assorted garish colors. Al's enthusiasm was contagious and Severus found himself almost smiling at the sheer amount of Al's joie de vivre.

Almost, but not quite. He had his reputation to maintain.

Hesitantly, Severus took the ball and carefully tossed it to Al.

"Catch," he ordered.

The rubber ball bounced off Al's head with an audible thud, and a quick Nessie expertly caught the ball before it broke anything valuable. Al made a mewling noise and slowly raised one hand to his head. He wasn't smiling, no, now he looked… yes… the only word that adequately expressed the tragic look in Al's blue eyes was _**betrayed.**_

"Master should throws underhand," Nessie softly explained. "Al catches ball like this."

She parodied Al catching the ball, and then she gently tossed the ball to Al with a soft, underhand throw.

The bastard caught it naturally, and beamed.

Merlin's fetid and fouled nappies; he was a cack handed idiot that he couldn't even correctly throw a bloody ball. How the bloody hell was he supposed to be a father with no bloody experience? The babe's mum was a lackwit and it wasn't like Severus had ever possessed half… no… even a quarter as many toys in his life as Al now owned. Well, fortunately Nessie was there to save the innocent babe from his parents, the Dark Monster and the Lackwit.

Bloody hell, he should turn the child over to Arthur Weasley to raise, even though the poor child was doomed by its parentage.

"Nessie, feel free to play with Al, I have work to do," he snapped.

It shouldn't hurt that Al was happily rolling the ball to Nessie while Daddy left for work.

It shouldn't! But it _**did**_.

* * *

Working to escape his family life was perhaps a very big mistake, Severus would later decide. A gleeful Lucius Malfoy swooped in like the proverbial Blonde Angel of Death, while Severus was in the midst of pouring a particularly complicated potion.

"The Dark Lord is quite pleased with you, and wondered how to reward you for your services," purred Lucius by way of greetings. "I let slip the fact that it was such a shame that your child with Dumbledore the stallion will be considered a bastard, as after all, two men can not be joined legally in Holy Matrimony."

Severus carefully capped the potion, methodically ensuring that the wax seal was perfectly placed even while his blood ran cold after the casual use of _Dark Lord_ and _Holy Matrimony_ in the same thought.

"Bellatrix agreed with me," Lucius' voice was silky smooth, which meant that he was about to slide the knife into Severus' back. "The Dark Lord, naturally, was so angered that such a term could be used to described your child for which he holds such high hopes, that he decided it was necessary to intervene."

_Intervene? Oh no, oh no. _Outwardly_,_ Severus was composed, inwardly, he was running around in circles, screaming and shouting.

"You and your stallion will be married this weekend. May I be the first to offer my heartfelt congratulations, and express my sincerest well wishes for many, fine offsprings?" Lucius then viciously twisted the knife in Severus' back. "You have an appointment with Madam Malkin for your wedding robe in thirty minutes. You better start getting ready."

* * *

Filius Flitwick was sitting in Minerva's sitting room, and he was reading _The Daily Prophet_ to Fawkes, who was resting in a place of honor, a large, comfortable settee. His head was still resting on Albus' frilly hat, and he had managed to cover his good wing with Albus' robe. His injured wing was carefully positioned on a large, fluffy pillow, and his eyes were drooping. Wilhelmina had just finished medicating him and Fawkes was rather drowsy from all the narcotics. But he struggled to keep his eyes open, as Fawkes was dutifully chaperoning Filius who was visiting a resting Minerva. The dignity and the reputation of the Head of Hogwarts must be maintained at all costs.

The big-hearted Fawkes had generously ignored the various episodes of spontaneous snogging and giggling that had occurred between the two mages, as the Phoenix was a bit of a romantic. But Fawkes vowed that there would be _**NO**_ shagging while he chaperoned them.

"The Caerphilly Catapults slaughtered the Sumbawanga Sunrays in their recent exhibition game," Filius read to Fawkes. At the Phoenix's lack of reaction, Filius peered over the paper to give the Phoenix an affectionate glance, "Oh, I forgot, you prefer the Thundelarra Thunderers, don't you?"

Fawkes gave a weak chirp of agreement, and Filius softly laughed.

"Well, what else might interest you? Ah, I know, you are probably quite keen on the society pages. Let's see…" Filius flipped toward the middle pages and then he gasped.

Loudly.

A dozing Minerva, exhausted after a long session of enthusiastic snogging, had been contentedly listening to Filius read to Fawkes. When Filius gasped, she opened her eyes and sat bolt upright.

"Whatever is the matter, Filius?" She intently questioned. "Flood, fire, famine?"

"It's the end of the world as we know it," Filius quipped. "Easy Min, they just announced that Severus' marriage is _**Saturday**_. The cheeky bugger didn't mention it yesterday. Rita has a large percentage of her column dedicated to the upcoming nuptials."

The noise that Fawkes voiced sounded a great deal like a very unphoenixy "What the bloody hell?"

"It's to be the social event of the season," Filius explained to Minerva. "Easy, Fawkes!"

The agitated Phoenix jarred his injured arm, and he squawked from the unexpected pain. Quickly, Filius flicked and swished before the Phoenix could undo all his medical care. Fawkes looked as though he wanted to lodge a protest with someone, _**ANYONE**_, just before he fell into a deep, restorative sleep.

* * *

Nessie grabbed her ears and twisted. HARD. Her Master wasn't here to instruct her and she didn't trust the stranger. Al was scared, and he was violently trembling. Oh! If only her kind and handsome Master was here! Master would explain everything to slow and stupid Nes. Master would make everything right!

"Master says Al not goes with anyone!" She shrilly protested.

"The Dark Lord insists that your charge gets new clothes," stated the stranger. "He and your Master are getting married…"

"Master and Al is getting married?" A skeptical Nessie intently questioned. She twisted her bad ear once more, hoping that the pain would help clear her head so she could think better. It didn't and she stared in disbelief at the stranger. "Master no inform Nessie!"

"Did you expect him to tell you? Are you also anticipating an invitation to their wedding? You're a House Elf! Your Master has far better things to do with his time than waste it by talking to you," said the cruel stranger.

Nessie's ears drooped like wilted flowers. It was the truth. Handsome Master was far too important to deal with a nasty, stupid House Elf like Nessie. If only Master cared for Nessie one hundredth as much as Nessie loved her handsome Master! It would be far more than nasty, stupid Nessie deserved.

"You don't want to _**shame**_ your Master by having his new spouse dressed in rags. Only a vile, wicked House Elf would want their Master so shamed," the dark haired man insisted. "I'm taking him to Madam Malkin, as she is to design his dress robe. The Dark Lord insists on nothing but the best for your Master's intended."

Master had instructed Nessie that no one could take Al anywhere unless the Dark Lord ordered it, but… Master also hadn't said that Al could go alone if the Dark Lord wanted him. Master would certainly want Nessie to keep an eye on Al and the baby. Therefore, Nessie would ensure that she would accompany Al.

"Nessie goes with Al," the House Elf decided. The bad man looked as though he was about to protest so Nessie quickly added, "Master not let Al goes by self. Nessie tend to Al. Master not happy if Nessie not allows to go with Al. Displeased Master deals with _**you **_if Master unhappy that Nessie and Al no together."

For good measure, she cheekily glared at the bad man, daring him to be brave enough to face the wrath of her beloved Master.

"Very well, bring him," snapped the bad man. "How did I rate this assignment? A drooling Dumbledore and a jealous House Elf?"

"Al goes with Nessie," the House Elf assured her trembling friend. For good measure, she tenderly patted his gnarled and twisted hands. "Nessie watch over Al. Nessie and Al go togethers so Al can be dressed pretty for wedding to Master."

Al's lips quivered and he mouthed something. Whatever thought he had struggled with, died unspoken. He trembled still harder, and he put his clenched fist in his mouth before he pulled away from Nessie. Not too hard, as Al knew he couldn't refuse, but enough to let Nessie know that he was truly frightened by events.

"Come alongs, Al," gently commanded the House Elf. "Master wants Al to be pretty. Nessie will brush Al's hair."

* * *

Madam Malkin was a short, squat witch who extensively dressed in shades of mauve. She believed herself quite the talented artiste and even with the recent regime change, her business still thrived. No matter what the political reality was, there was always a need for new clothes. Sometimes, a new gown might be bought as a spurious pick me up and a funeral always demanded a new robe for its honored guest. And if she was selling more funeral related attire than before, well, that was fine with Madam Malkin as whether her clients were alive or dead, their Galleons spent just as well.

The Dark Lord's followers had commanded her to arrive here for a new commission, and she struggled to keep unease from showing on her serene composure. It was a highly unusual assignment as two wizards were to be married, and she was to first dress the 'bride'. The lucky groom would be arriving shortly for his own fitting. While some might squawk about the erosion of traditional family values, Madam Malkin, as a long time widow, firmly believed that keeping food on her family's table was the most important family value. If two mages wanted to marry, let them, as long as they paid their bills promptly.

Yaxley growled about her being late, though she had arrived well before scheduled appointment.

"You're to tell no one who your customers are," the Death Eater warned her. His brutal face was twisted in what some might foolishly believe as a smile, but reminded Madam Malkin of a rabid wolf. "If for any reason the Dark Lord suspects that you have told anyone, your grandchildren will be given to Fenrir Greyback for his enjoyment."

"I promised," Madam Malkin reminded Yaxley.

"I just wanted to remind you as Antonin is due here shortly."

There was a sound of a door opening, and Yaxley laughed. "Here he is finally," he stated. Then in a teasing tone, he remarked on wanting to see the expression on her face when she realized who her client was.

_Please, don't let it be the Dark Lord_, she prayed. While she had dressed Cornelius Fudge and far too many other Ministers of Magic to keep a running count, the Dark Lord was an entirely different matter. Merlin forbid, she accidentally stuck him with a pin.

When her customer was revealed, the normally quite loquacious Madam Malkin was stunned into speechless for the very first time in all of recorded history.

_**Albus Dumbledore? Carrying a House Elf?**_

"Remember, if you want your grandchild to live, not a single, solitary word," Yaxley breathed in her ear.

* * *

Nes held his hand and led him through a long hallway. After several turns and still more strolling, Al had begun to walk slower in order to delay whatever Not Goodness was to happen. His sluggishness angered the Not Good who painfully twisted Nessie's bad ear and then spoke to her loudly in a threatening tone.

"Al walks faster?" Nessie softly whimpered.

The Not Good had _**hurt**_ Nes! He glared daggers at the oblivious Not Good, and then Al carefully picked up Nessie. Gently, he cradled Nessie against his chest, and then he touched Nessie's deformed ear.

"Nessie is fine," the House Elf softly assured him.

There was water in Nes' eyes, and Nes loudly sniffled, so Al knew that Nes was hurt. He tightened his embrace, wishing to shelter her from harm. No one, not even the Red Eyed Monster that haunted his dreams would ever hurt his Nes. His thought was noble foolishness, Al knew, as he couldn't even stop the Not Goods from hurting him, but he'd shield her body with his and provide as much protection as he could.

The Not Good realized that Al had stopped moving and he returned back to the two of them.

"Does Severus approve of your bloody House Elf fetish? It was disgusting enough that you supported the Mudbloods and the Muggles but you're a pervy House Elf fancier also?"

Roughly grabbing Al by his arm, the Not Good pulled him down the hallway. It hurt, but Al refused to voice his pain. He had Nes to protect and he needed to be strong. There was another Not Good waiting for him when they finally stopped traveling and there was also a round witch. Her mouth opened and closed, and she looked like wanted to say something… anything… but she couldn't. Al felt a great deal of compassion for the witch, as he knew that sensation all too well.

Her mouth opened and closed again, opened and closed a third time, and then she looked at the Not Goods.

"Yes, I know, my grandchildren," she stated in a very quavering tone. "Do you want to stay here while I measure him?"

"The idea of seeing him unclothed makes me nauseous," said the darker haired Not Good. "His loyal House Elf can return him back home when he's done if his fiancé isn't here by the time he's done. He's lost a great deal of weight, but he's been slowly putting it back on, especially in his belly."

Al was quite glad when the Not Goods left, but it left him with the strange woman who seemed to be damaged like he was. Not as severely, as she could eventually make the sounds that the others understood, but she still seemed… broken. Nes wiggled out of his arms, and she carefully hugged his knees. He rubbed his hand on her head and she purred happily. Then Nes faced the witch.

"You dress Al prettily for wedding to Master?" Nes demanded of the witch.

"Yes," Malkin stated.

"Make Al pretty!" Nes intently demanded. "Needs to match Handsome Master."

Malkin rapidly agreed once more as she feared that the only Mage capable of marrying Albus Dumbledore as his bride was the Dark Lord. Truly she did not want to risk his displeasure. She quickly got to business and began to magically measure Al.

Unexpectedly, Al was attacked by a flying measuring tape that encircled, ensnared and entrapped him. He whimpered and started shaking uncontrollably even while he unsuccessfully attempted to tear the tape from his body.

"Alb… Al… I've measure you before this way and you didn't mind then," the witch stated. "You liked the robes I made for you. I made you those lovely spangled outfits and I even found you several pairs of matching high heeled boots that you liked so much."

"Al hurted," helpfully offered the House Elf, as though that thought would explain everything.

The seamstress, realizing that magically measuring Al was a lost cause, put away her measuring tape. She then pulled out an old, faded yellow measuring tape that had been through several World Wars and far too many Clearance Day Sales at her shop. It was a treasured family heirloom, a gift given to her first ancestor that had shown the first spark of magic. It had been past down generation to generation.

"Very well, we'll do this the old fashion way!" The seamstress said cheerfully. "We'll need him to undress and stand on the stool. Then I'll measure him."

* * *

Al was shivering from the cold. Nes had stripped him down to his undergarments and then insisted that he stand on a chair. The witch had begun placing that long THING against him and she had made numerous comments. Right now, she had one hand very close to his boy bits and her other hand by his ankle.

"Inseam is exactly what I remembered," the witch proclaimed. "I never forget a measurement, but dearie me, you certainly have lost a great deal of weight! I'm surprised that you still have a bit of tummy though, but don't you worry, I'll put a little extra forgiveness spell in your waistband."

Al just stared at the witch, and he was sucking on his right hand. He was so confused, he just didn't understand this entire experience and then the witch _**pulled**_ at the waistband of his pants and she gandered at his boy parts!

"I didn't remember which way you dressed, dearie," the witch stated. "My, my, my, someone is _**certainly**_ getting a big present for their wedding night."

Nes' ears were crooked at an odd angle, which meant that Nes was displeased.

"Master will _**not**_ approve," she growled. "Al will be getting clothed _**now**_."

Nes pulled him off the chair, and she put his robe back on him. Once he was clothed, Nes reassuringly patted his hand.

"Your Master will understand, as it's very necessary to know how he dresses. Else his clothes won't fit properly," the witch patiently explained, though she admitted that perhaps taking such a long, lingering look at the bride's wand hadn't been appropriate. "Now, did your Master give you instructions on what he wants his bride to wear for their wedding?"

Malkin was justifiably proud that she didn't stumble over calling Dumbledore a blushing bride. She had been involved with marriages ceremonies far stranger than this one. Why, there had been the wedding where the LeStrange groom had insisted on woman's undergarments of his own to wear under his dress robe. Madam Malkin was justifiably proud of her ability to keep a secret, as her ironclad policy of complete confidentiality had meant many Galleons over the years.

"Nessie not told," the House Elf sadly admitted; her ears at half mast due to her intense shame.

"Perhaps, I can show you my samples and you can point out the fabrics that your Master might like?" the seamstress offered. "I'm assuming that he'll wear the traditional white dress robe."

With a quick flourish, Madam Malkin revealed a vast assortment of white fabrics. Swatches of silk, velvet, cotton, linen, leather, lace, satin, brocades, spangled, glittering, checked patterns, winter white to ivory to the purest white were all eagerly displayed.

Nes' eyes widened in delight.

Her old Mistress had never wondered where her old fashion magazines had gone after she had finished reading them. Her House Elf had devoured each and every magazine, dreaming of the day that she would be called upon to dress her Mistress in a style more appropriate to her body type. While her late and unlamented Mistress had continued to dress unbecomingly until her dying day, Nes' newfound knowledge had not gone for naught when she had been given to Severus Snape, a man who was in as much need of fashion advice, if not more, than her old Mistress had been. Nessie had been systematically and surreptitiously improving his wardrobe. As long as she kept the colors the same, her Master didn't seem to notice that he was no longer wearing the rags he had once worn.

But Nessie knew and she thought her Master looked quite handsome and well-groomed. If Master would only let Nessie do something with his hair!

"Al needing long, flowing bell sleeves or kimono sleeves to hide hurt hands," Nes eagerly suggested. "High neck robe with a princess cut. Hides Al's tummy."

The seamstress' dark eyes glittered in delight when she realized that she had found the rarest of souls, another fashionista.

"You have _**wonderful**_ taste, my dear. I've been trying to convince him to change his style for years," cooed Malkin. "For someone of his age, he should refrain from all the frilly spangles. What do you think your master should wear?"

"Master wears too much black," Nes authoritatively announced. "Perhaps green and silver accents?"

By the time Severus Snape managed to track down his blushing bride to be, Nessie and Madam Malkin had finalized what the two men would be wearing.

* * *

The next afternoon found Severus in a strange, pensive mood. He was in no condition to brew today as he was so distracted by upcoming events, so he had taken a Holiday.

_I'm to be married tomorrow… to bloody Albus Dumbledore. I have no idea what I'm wearing, as Malkin and Nessie decided. NESSIE! My house elf is apparently a raving fashionista. If she's such a bloody fashion diva, why hasn't she done anything with my wardrobe? I still look like a bloody, underpaid school teacher._

_Wait, Cissy had commented on the cut of my new frock coat the other day. I thought she was being a daft prat._

Al, with the single-mindedness of a child, happily ignored him. He had discovered the building blocks and he was busy creating a masterpiece while Nessie watched. Severus couldn't blame the House Elf for watching as it was rather amusing entertainment to watch the determined Al build. It looked familiar, but he couldn't place it, therefore Severus decided to look at Al's magnum opus from another angle.

He walked to Al's right, and patted him on the shoulder.

From this angle, Al's footprint of his castle was almost recognizable. He had even included a tower! A Tower; wasn't Al _**creative**_…

Severus' blood ran cold.

The tower wasn't just a tower; it was the Bloody Ravenclaw Tower.

_**Al is building a miniature HOGWARTS.**_

_**IN MY SITTING ROOM. **_

There was a loud knock on the door, and Severus made a quick decision. With a quick, surgical strike, he deliberately kicked Al's masterpiece, and then spread the blocks over the floor. Al's face fell and he protectively grabbed one of his blocks even while Nessie gasped.

"Al, there will be _**none**_ of this," Severus hissed.

A furious Al threw a block at him and hit him square in the nethers. There was no doubt in Severus' mind, that it was a conscious, deliberate blow. His fiancée then crossed his arms and refused to acknowledge him as Al was determined to have a Sulk. Whoever was at the door decided to knock once more.

_Do not ask for whom the door knocks__, it __knocks__ for thee, Severus Snape._

This could be almost comical, except for the fact that with Severus' luck, it was probably the Dark Lord stopping by for drinks.

"Nessie, please get the door," Severus demanded.

Severus grabbed one of the blocks from the floor and held it close to Al's face.

"Do not build _**anything**_ while we have company. Do you understand? Don't _**DO**_ it," he hissed. "Do not put one _**BLOCK**_ on top of _**ANOTHER**_."

Al took the block from Severus' hand with a lightening fast grab, retreated away from Severus and gave him a glower.

"Don't glare at me like that, your face will freeze like that," Severus snapped.

_**Merlin's Scrote, the bloody tadpole hasn't arrived yet and I'm dispensing clichés! **_

"I wish to see your Master," purred Lucius Malfoy. "Oh, there he is, with the lucky bride to be. Come along, Severus, I'm here to take you to your Stag Night."

"Stag Night?" Severus repeated.

"Celebrating your last night as a free man," Lucius explained. "I have quite the evening planned. Normally, we end the night at a strip club, but with your well known penchant, I've decided to set you up in a nice hotel room. I've been assured that a proverbial, golden Adonis will be eagerly awaiting you. Actually, he's _**auburn**_ with stunning blue eyes."

Lucius smirked and then he looked at Al's destructed masterpiece. Then he mockingly laughed at the sour look on Al's face. A whimpering Al was still clutching one block in his crippled hands and Nessie was attempting to console him.

"Attempting to stack blocks are we?" He cooed. "As you just realized, it's far more difficult than it looks, Albus. But you need to cheer up, as you're getting _**married**_ tomorrow. Try to look happy when they take your picture tomorrow, Albus."

* * *

Not Good Sev left with the Not Good and Al continued to snivel. Not Good Sev had deliberately and cruelly _**knocked**_ over his blocks!

Nes stroked Al's hair and offered him a sweet. He took it, but the chokie didn't take the bad taste from his mouth. His castle had been _**destroyed**_!

He had carefully put the blocks together, being patient because his damaged hands couldn't work as fast as his mind thought. It had seemed like there was a blue print in his mind. Each block had gone into place, just so, and he could almost see the final block being placed. There would be banners and streamers, and the bright fly by would be in the blue sky. It had seemed so real, as though the castle truly existed somewhere, and then Not Good Sev had _**knocked**_ it over.

He _**hated**_ Not Good Sev and he had _**intentionally**_ thrown a heavy block at Sev's boy part. Sev had yipped and danced about so Al hoped the block had scored and _**HURT**_.

Nes was the only Good in his life, Al knew. The bright thing had gone and hadn't come back. Surrounded on all sides by Not Goods, Al appreciated what little Good there was, so he pulled Nes into his lap. He embraced her even while he continued to sob about his destroyed castle and his fractured memories.


	15. Chapter 15

A/N # 1 – This chapter has absolutely positively refused to behave. So I apologize to all three of you that are reading it. Actually since EP is back from vacation that makes four. Plus that spy from PETA who sends me harassing Emails about molesting sheep. That makes five!

A/N # 2 – Thanks to MyMadness for her help with this chapter. Notwillingtoadmit's snark had disappeared for parts unknown and MM helped jazz up the chapter. As Snark is Good Thing.

* * *

"Al stops crying," a quite concerned Nes gently commanded her charge. She lovingly patted Al on his shoulder before she blotted his copious tears with a clean handkerchief. Al continued his heartbroken sobs, forlornly clutching his building blocks in his clenched claws and Nessie felt sad.

From time to time, the House Elf wondered who Albus Dumbledore had once been and what he had done to deserve to be so cruelly damaged by her Master's Master. In Al's current state, he was no threat to anyone but to himself. It was hard for Nessie to comprehend that Al had once been a redoubtable wizard. Especially now, when he was reduced to a wet, whimpering mass of humanity because Master had booted over his building blocks. Yet Al must have been formidable for Master's friends to so enjoy seeing Al reduced low. Her former Mistress had never spoken of Dumbledore, and Nessie hadn't been allowed to read _The Daily Prophet_. Her Mistress had caught her once but once had been enough for Nessie as Mistress had been so furious that she had twisted Nessie's bad ear until Nessie truly feared that it would tear.

Even though she was a nasty, stupid House Elf, Nessie enjoyed reading and her current Master didn't seem to mind that she read _The Daily Prophet_ after all her chores were completed.

When the last of Al's tears had been shed and his shirt was soaked with his tears, an emotionally exhausted depleted Al was medicated with an ill-advised quantities of chockies. After the last chockie had been greedily devoured, Nessie decided to teach Al baby sign language. Master had suggested it, so Nessie had read the book frontward and backwards. Maybe it would beneficial for Al if he could communicate with her as Al often seemed nothing more than a towering, extremely frustrated two year old.

"Al very smart," Nessie assured her student before they started.

Al's blue eyes were still sad, and but Nessie brightly smiled. If Nessie taught Al how to sign, Master would be so pleased with Nessie and Al! Master would _**never**_ be able to call her Al a cabbage – or any type of vegetable - again. Nessie knew that her beloved Master wasn't being mean when he called Al his daft, duffed up cabbage, but Nessie secretly believed that that term of endearment wasn't very nice or truly endearing.

"Al very smart!" Nessie repeated. Then with her index and middle fingers slightly bent, she tapped her chin and then clearly enunciated, "Nessie!"

Having dealt with her former Mistress' swarm of offspring, Nessie had an inexhaustible supply of patience. And secretly, she was pleased that _**her**_ Al was far smarter than those sheep could ever have hoped. Therefore, she continued to repeat her name and the appropriate sign language for "Auntie" for some time, until at last, a rather perplexed and extremely frustrated Al mimicked her.

She squeaked in her excitement and then the House Elf swiftly hugged her rather startled student.

"Al did it! Al did it! Al signed NESSIE! Al smart! Nessie knew! Master be so proud!" Nessie excitedly exclaimed.

* * *

If it wasn't bad enough that Al's head hurt from his crying jag and his anger over his blocks being knocked asunder but now the House Elf was utterly confusing him. She kept rapping her chin with her index and middle fingers and repeating her name. Al didn't understand why she was doing that but Nes was Good, so he attempted to say her name. Perhaps, she did not understand that he was damaged and couldn't make the sounds that she did. He moved his lips but as always no intelligible sound escaped from his mouth. Finally, in complete frustration, Al tapped his chin _**exactly**_ like Nes was doing.

The gesture earned him a tight embrace from the happy House Elf. She then popped him a chockie and then gestured once more.

"Al likes chockies!" Nes clearly stated. "Al be a good wizard and sign for the chockie!" She then repeated the gestures and the sounds.

Al was Al, he knew _**that**_ much, and chockies were the sweet tasty Good things that Sev and Nes gave him. He never got enough chockies from Sev as the man hoarded them and kept them for himself. But Good Nes freely shared her sweets with Al which was why Al liked her best.

He tried to mimic the movement of Nes' hands with his own, and Nes again squeaked her excitement.

"Al is _smart_!"

Al was given another chockie after he once more duplicated those gestures, and it was then that he realized what Nes was doing. He couldn't make those strange sounds that she and Sev made, but Nes' hands could "talk". If Al could copy those gestures, he could be _**understood**_. No longer would he be trapped in his strange world where no one comprehended him.

While the mind, body and soul of Albus Dumbledore had been despicably and savagely violated and vindictively maimed, his towering intellect was still intact. It was just locked away somewhere deep inside. Therefore, he pursued this strange hand talk with the same passion that he had once spent determining the twelve uses of Dragon's Blood. His exhausted mind was overflowing with all the possibilities of hand talk by the time a purring Nes tucked him into bed, and he carefully signed, "Nes Good."

The beaming House Elf signed back, "Al Good."

How exciting this was, Al thought.

He eagerly looked forward to tomorrow when Nes would explain still more to him. Al had learned such difficult concepts as "Chockies", "Please", "Bath", "Food" among other things, and he had even told Nes that he was tired and wanted his bed. Those hand gestures had produced the most amazing results as she had helped him change and then she carefully tucked him into bed. What would he learn tomorrow?

"Sev Not Good," he signed. He showed her one of his blocks, sadly pouted, and hoped that she'd understand.

Nes' eyes grew big and she yipped, plus her expressive ears were flat against her skull. Her yip was an awful sound as though Al had stepped on her foot. He had done that once, and Nes had loudly wailed.

"No! No! Master _**good**_! Al _**no**_ say that!" Nes savagely insisted. Her hands flew too fast for him to understand her, but Al knew that Good Nes was upset with Al.

He mewled, and then the angry Nes softened.

"Al sorry?" The House Elf intently questioned.

Al nodded his head and quickly signed. "Al _**loves**_ Nes!"

He kept signing that over and over again until Nes gestured back that she loved him. Al wasn't sure what "love" meant, but since Nes had taught him the phrase and happily bounced when he had first gestured it back to her, he knew it was important. Hand talk was too confusing, a sad Al thought. The world still bewildered him even with his newfound knowledge and he had upset Nes!

"Master _**good**_!" an aggravated Nes furiously signed.

And so, Al signed that over and over again until Nes was happy.

It did not mean that he actually believed it.

* * *

On the morning of his wedding, Severus woke up alone in a rather large bed in a well appointed hotel room that had mirrors in the strangest places. Bliss was his for just a few fleeting moments while he savored having the bed completely to himself without Al's sharp elbows and cold feet, and then the fickle Gods bequeathed him the headache from hell. Not having any potions handy, he pinched the bridge of his nose. A Chinese mage had sworn that accupressuring that particular spot would relieve his headaches. Sometimes, it worked, and sometimes, it didn't.

Today, naturally, it didn't.

_I'm marrying Albus Dumbledore today. Minerva would have my tripes for soup if she only knew._

Alas, Severus did not realize that by the end of his wedding day, he could only look back and fondly wish that Minerva had merely served his bollocks for stew.

No matter how hard Severus attempted, though truth demanded that he admit that his struggle was rather lame, he failed to remember much of his Stag Night. He vaguely recalled copious drinking, Muggle baiting, criminal damage, theft of a bicycle, littering, loitering and even co-mingling previously separated recyclables plus the mandatory acts of mass destruction. Plus there had been that lovely, auburn haired man-whore who was quite… passionate… on making Severus' last night as a free man memorable.

It had been far too long for Severus and the whore did have those exquisite blue eyes… and incredible hands. Bloody hell, wherever the hell did Lucius find him? Whatever his name was, he looked like a very young, fortunately extremely beardless Albus Dumbledore.

Though the faux Albus was more than a little shafted with regards to the size and heft of his wand.

_I shouldn't even think that. It's vile and disgusting to even think such naughty thoughts as that duffed up cabbage is most assuredly not the Headmaster. It's a walking womb. _

He stared at the ceiling of the room, berating himself for not being able to do more to protect Al. Severus couldn't prevent the wedding and the Resistance was still floundering.

On the upside... Bollocks, today, there was _**no**_ upside.

* * *

Since the deaths of Arthur and Molly Weasley, Bill Weasley had kept a firm, paternal eye on his red-headed clan and held regularly scheduled summits. He took his job as senior Weasley very seriously, and he struggled to be as much like his father as possible, though he believed that he failed miserably in his new role. Arthur had managed to keep the entire Weasley family together through the difficult years as long as one kindly counted the entire Percy incident as merely an extended period of teenage rebellion. Little did Bill realize that his parents were quite aware of his new role. Arthur, in fact, was quite chuffed on how well Bill was handling his new responsibility as Head Weasley.

Most of the time, the various significant others, e.g. wife, fiancée, fiancé, girlfriends and other assorted souls were allowed to attend the Weasley War Council.

Not so today.

Even Percy had been deliberately excluded from this meeting, as he simply couldn't be trusted. Percy lacked the gene for subterfuge that was part of the expected Weasley genetic code.

Today, the Weasleys were having a Council of War to discuss an act of Weasley Retribution so horrific and yet so karmicly proper (Well, they sincerely believed it was) that they didn't wish even the faintest whisper to be brought to Minerva McGonagall's attention as she most certainly would not approve. While the witch was still recovering from a recent illness, the fear of Eagle Eyed McGonagall was too engrained in a generation of Gryffindors to count her out. She had ways of discovering things best left undiscovered, and her vengeance was fast, furious and quite painful for the unlucky miscreants involved. Payback was a bitch, especially when the maiden inflicting it was a spinster Scottish schoolmarm clad in tartan jimjams.

Plus Filius Flitwick had become quite the Enforcer since McGonagall had taken control of the rebellion. If McGonagall didn't catch you, then the fastest wand in Europe would nail your arse to the wall and leave you hanging upside down for a few hours until you tearfully repented. The mild-mannered Filius Flitwick was quite savage when it came to enforcing McGongall's edicts.

"He's getting **married**," Charlie spat as if he had mistakenly eaten an earwax flavored Bertie Bott's Bean. His broad, freckled face was full of revulsion.

"I pity the girl that's marrying him," Ginny fiercely stated, having no trace of pity whatsoever in her tone. "Do you think he had to give her a _**potion**_?"

"He's _**Spawning**_! That's the scary part," Ron inserted. "She must have put a bag on her head."

"Over his!" one of the twins added.

"He should have bagged his prick! That way she wouldn't be pushing out a litter of Snapes," inserted the other twin.

"She must have been completely unconscious while he had his merry way with her!" Charlie helpfully added.

While truthfully Bill had been much closer to his father than his Mum, times like these made him realize why exactly his Mum had been such a shrill harridan. How Molly Weasley had not gone completely round the bend with this lot was completely beyond Bill's comprehension. He needed to rope in his group of rambunctious redheaded tricksters.

"Regardless of the fact that he's spawned another Snapelette, what we're concerned about is utterly destroying his wedding festivities and embarrassing him horribly. So then, we're agreed?" Bill questioned in his best impersonation of Arthur's voice.

It wasn't even necessary to place a vote, as all six Weasleys had made it their private goal in life to make Severus Snape pay through his distinctively hooked nose for the murder of their parents. Yes, Minerva McGonagall had loudly asserted that Severus Snape had not needed to bring his parents back to Hogwarts for a proper burial, but all that act meant to Bill was that he knew exactly who to blame.

Severus Tobias Snape and his unfortunate bride were soon to learn that hell hath no fury like six redheaded Weasleys itching for retribution.

"We've got our Canary Creams modified, U-No-Poo…Even if you're not, we're still doing it!" Fred and George quickly announced.

"We've got the diagrams to the Malfoy Hall," Charlie admitted. "We've already made some modifications to the tables. It was quite easy to slip past the guards."

"Plus I've already made numerous contributions to the wedding cake," admitted Ginny. While Molly Weasley had been blessed with the ability to cook that talent had completely skipped Ginny. In fact when informed that Harry and Ginny were engaged, a concerned Molly had taken it upon herself to teach Harry how to cook as she feared that the newlyweds would starve their first year.

Bill listened to his brothers lovingly detail exactly what Wizardly mayhem they had created for an act of Weasley payback so sublime, it would live on in Wizardly Infamy. He could almost pity the bent beaked bastard, except for the fact that Severus Snape deserved far far worse than to be merely humiliated at his wedding.

"Very well then, Charlie, let us be off," Bill decided before adding a stern warning. "We can't let anyone know as McGongall will murder us."

A lighting fast strike by the Weasleys to Severus' wedding hall had been the plan, but alas, a big black dog with a gaily wagging tail met them as they were leaving their meeting.

"Padfoot!" Bill hissed. "You're _**not**_ coming!"

The dog stared at him with beseeching eyes and happily wagged his tail still harder.

"You don't let him come, he'll run and tell McGonagall!" Charlie informed his brother.

The big black dog's big brown eyes looked concerned that Charlie mistakenly believed that he was a rat rather than a dog, but he continued to follow the Weasleys.

"He can be a guard dog," Ginny quickly decided. "He can warn us if he smells anyone."

She was rewarded with a wet, sloppy, overly enthusiastic doggie kiss.

"Oy! I'm telling Harry!" Ron protested with a rather sick expression

The saboteurs left Hogwarts, their absence completely undetected, or so they mistakenly thought. Arthur Weasley's sixth sense had been warning him that his children were Up to Evil and he had long learned to listen to that still, quiet voice of reason. He easily located Percy, but he couldn't find the rest of his children.

"Bloody hell, what are they doing?" He growled.

* * *

When Al woke on the next day, he was in the bedroom by himself. Nes wasn't there and Good Sev wasn't next to him either. He softly whimpered, and hoped someone would hear him.

No one came. Perhaps, they wanted him to use hand talk rather than make noise?

Carefully, he made the gestures that he had learned last night. His movements got larger as he got more and more uncertain. It was _**frightening**_ to be completely alone.

Nes? _**NES**_!

Fortunately, she soon appeared. The House Elf was literally jumping in her happiness and her ears were upright and quivering.

"Al's wedding robes arrived. They are pretty! Al look handsome when he and Master marries! Nessie gets Al ready! Nessie will make Al look handsome! Nessie wishes she could go to wedding but Nessie not allowed."

Her ears went flat against her head when she admitted that.

"Nessie shouldn't wants to see Master and Al gets married. Nessie stupid, dirty House Elf but Nessie wants to see Master and Mistress marries!"

In response to her chattering, Al carefully signed, "Al loves Nessie" and Nessie squeaked happily. In turn, she assured him that "Nessie loves Al".

"Nessie takes good care of Al!" The House Elf bubbled before she insisted that he get out of bed. "Nessie wash Al and then Nessie is braiding his hair!"

The House Elf seemed possessed as she thoroughly washed and cleaned him; put him in a dressing gown before intricately braiding and rebraiding his hair until at last she decided to put his hair down for the festivities. Using a hot iron, she curled Al's hair until she was completely satisfied with the final result. Then Nes carefully pulled his hair back into a ponytail bound by a white ribbon, allowing only a few curly ringlets to escape. It was a carefully disheveled look and Nes believed Al quite attractive.

Al cared not at all for his hairstyle. There were far more important issues as the House Elf had forgotten to feed him!

Al's face crunched up and then he plaintively signed, "Al _**food**_!"

"Al eats later! After _**wedding**_!" She explained. "Al needing to get ready!"

Naturally, since he didn't understand her, Al determinedly repeated the gestures, wishing Nessie to understand his serious concern regarding him expiring from hunger.

"AL _**FOOD**_! AL _**CHOCKIE**_!"

At last, she slipped him a handful of chockies to quiet him, and he was content for a bit until his stomach protested. Maybe it wasn't a good idea that he had eaten all those chockies as his belly now felt all rumbly.

Meanwhile, Nes was busy scurrying through the room, muttering, "Something old, something new, something borrowed; something blue and a silver sickle for Al shoe."

After a few minutes, she plopped a few things on the table next to Al and then she saw Al's face.

"Al got chockie in his beard!" Nes wailed. She found a wet towel and began energetically scrubbing Al's face. Ignoring his moan of protest, Nes industriously scrubbed until Al's face shone like the sun. "Al messy! Al _**messy**_!"

Al wasn't quite sure that he had any face left as Nes had scrubbed so hard. He patted his face to see if it was still there even while Nes began dressing him.

"Nessie found blue socks in Al's things! They old and blue!" She excitedly exclaimed as she crammed his feet into these soft things. Then Nes remembered her new role as teacher in Al's life.

"Socks!" she loudly exclaimed before she made a pulling gesture with her hands. "Socks!"

He duplicated her gesture which earned him another chockie plopped into his mouth. He ignored his rumbly stomach and instead he savored the taste. His tummy made a protesting wiggle and Al quickly swallowed. It would be Not Good to sick up, Al knew. Chockie tasted Good going down, Not Good coming back up.

"Al no get chockie on beard!" Nes warned.

Al stared at his feet and then he happily wiggled his toes while Nes ran for still more items.

"Socks GOOD," he silently mouthed even as he repeated that strange hand thing. The sound wouldn't come to his lips, but nevertheless he was happy. Al had learned a new word, and he decided that now that he knew what they were, he really liked socks. Warm, cozy socks in a lovely shade of blue. "Al love socks," he signed.

Nessie returned with a pair of pants, white trousers and a light white shirt. She also had a pair of high heeled, buckled boots in a warm, white leather.

"Nessie not sure about boots," the House Elf muttered darkly. "Nessie thinks Al has enough problems without fashion footwear adding them."

It took some strenuous effort on Nes' part but before long, Al had been stuffed into his new outfit, complete with a silver sickle in his left boot. He stared at the boots and wide-eyed, he made admiring noises. He decided that he liked them even better than he liked his socks.

"Al try walking!" Nes happily chirped.

He stood with a little help from Nessie. Al felt tall and proud; he moved to stroke his beard that was no longer there. Then, regal as any Muggle king, he took his first step and promptly went arse over tit. Nes squeaked and managed to prevent him from landing on his face.

"No boots, Al," Nes exclaimed in a serious tone. "Al no walk in boots."

* * *

In the end, Al won the war over his footwear. He refused to let Nes take them off him, and when Madam Malkin arrived to help finish dressing Al, Nes was required to open the door. By the time, Nes returned to Al with Madam Malkin in tow, Al had managed to learn how to properly walk in his new boots. He happily clapped his damaged hands together and then his face fell when he realized that there were strangers in his room. One was the damaged woman that he had previously met, another was the blonde woman with the bay bee inside plus there was a dark haired woman who scared him. Perhaps he shouldn't have gorged himself on chockies as his belly started flip-flopping horribly.

"Nes!" he signed. The House Elf ran to him and reassuringly patted his hand.

"I can not believe that I'm a bridesmaid for _**him**_," snapped the dark haired woman.

"Bella," Cissy Malfoy said in a very controlled tone. "Need I remind you that the Dark Lord insisted? I don't know why you're whinging, you're only a bridesmaid; I'm the Matron of Honor." Considering the long established sibling rivalry between the Black Sisters, even the distasteful duty of being Maid of Honor to Albus Dumbledore presented Cissy with the perfect opportunity to gloat over her dominance of Bella.

The icy blond rubbed her burgeoning belly and scowled. "Unless she decides to arrive early, and then you're promoted."

"Nessie, you've done a wonderful job getting him ready," a nervous Malkin assured the House Elf. The two Demon Bridesmaids from Hell were making Malkin rather anxious and she vowed then and there to append an additional surcharge to her bill. "We'll take over from now as we need to get him into his Wedding Robe."

"Nessie found horseshoe," the House Elf explained. "Al only needs something borrowed. Nessie find!"

"She calls him Al, how quaint," Bella snidely stated as Nessie ran to find something that Al could borrow for the wedding. "It appears that the great Albus Dumbledore was a pervy House Elf lover."

Nessie ignored the witch as she was busy searching. What could she let Al borrow for his wedding to Master? He was to be dressed in white except for a black tie and black waistcoast, and Nessie believed that her Al looked very becoming. Not as handsome as Master did, but still Al looked nice, a suitable mate for Master.

**_Master's black scarf!_**

She had hidden it in her bed like her Master had instructed her to do, and Al could borrows it! With a quick snap of her fingers, Nes had the scarf in her hands. She straightened it and then ran back to Madam Malkin.

"Al wears this?" She hopefully asked after presenting the scarf to the designer. "Needing something borrowed? For luck?"

The House Elf hopefully peered up at Madam Malkin, again ignoring the retching noise that the black haired witch was making.

"Yes," Malkin imperiously decided, as Bella LeStrange was beginning to anger her with her snide comments. The witch had _**no**_ sense of style, her hair needed a good brushing plus her husband wore woman's knickers under his robes – Malkin would have known that LeStrange wore them just by seeing how he walked, she hadn't need to see him proudly modeling them. "The black scarf will be just the thing. Thank you. Tres haute couture."

The Elf doubtfully looked at her.

"That's French," Malkin explained.

"Duh," Bella snapped. "Or should I say 'Le Duh'?"

Nessie happily bounced while Malkin placed the scarf just so around Al's neck. Then the fashionable stylist adjusted his tasseled hat before giving him a long, appraising look.

"Perfect," Malkin finally decreed.

Nessie then squeezed Al's hands before placing the horseshoe in his right hand.

"Al goes with them. Master will be there," she explained. "No be afraid, Al."

She waved a sad goodbye while a frantic Al was dragged out of the room by Madam Malkin. Both Cissy and Bella, being expectant mothers, refused to so much as lift a finger to get the hysterical bride to his marriage ceremony. Meanwhile, Nessie sniffled as she truly wanted to go to the wedding.

* * *

Severus Snape gazed at his reflection in the mirror and finally, he had to admit that Nessie had done quite well in choosing his wedding apparel. A long black jacket with a mandarin collar was similar enough to his normal wear that he felt comfortable in it, yet it was far nicer than his norm.

"Any final thought before the noose descends upon your neck?" Lucius purred. "You know something cheerful to match this joyous situation?"

Really, should Lucius as his Best Man take such an obscene delight in Severus' marriage?

"I am delighted that my child will be legitimate," was Severus' quick retort.

"All my children _**are**_ legitimate," Lucius assured him. "All… twelve… of them."

"Fourteen," Severus wearily reminded him. Merlin's scrote, couldn't Lucius keep track of his spawn? "Plus Pansy's due any day now with the latest batch of Malfoys."

"I suppose I have to be there when she grunts it out," admitted an indifferent Lucius. "Be the proud father and present her with a suitable token representing my high esteem for her prolific reproductive organs. Feel free to join me so you can see how you're supposed to act when Albus subdivides. I just hope that she's not at the wedding as Pansy's rather clingy when she's this close to dropping and Cissy will be quite vexed if my attention wanders."

"I thought this was to be a small wedding," Severus protested. Actually he had never asked how many people were invited to the wedding as he didn't think anyone would want to attend.

What was he thinking? The chance to watch Severus Snape make a complete and utter arse out of himself by personally bonding Albus Dumbledore as his very own private ewe? Was there a church big enough?

"Your former students were invited, naturally, and we couldn't find Albus' goat loving brother so you don't have to worry about him showing up and disrupting the wedding by protesting," Lucius assured him. "Very well, shall we be off?"

He put his hand on Severus' arm and he Disapparated, taking the groom with him.

They arrived at the Malfoy country home, located in Southsea, overlooking the English Channel.

"This is where you escort your blushing bride to our hall," Lucius dryly explained. "Oh my, he seems to be a mite verklempt. He's not to be handling his pre-wedding jitters well."

Severus turned and saw the gobsmacked Al. He was trembling and he had his right hand crammed in his drooling mouth. Cissy was attempting to calm him while Bella was being her usual helpful self and making snide, debauched comments about the forthcoming wedding night. His intended made a squeaking noise when he saw him and he started furiously gesturing at Severus.

Al kept putting a "ring" on his ringer finger.

_**He's signing for me. Bloody hell, Nessie taught him my name!**_

Severus fluidly signed Al's name, and then Al signed once more.

_**Al loves Sev.**_

That stopped Severus cold. What the bloody hell?

His lack of response caused Al to tremble and he began signing even faster.

_**Al loves Sev. Al loves Sev. Al loves Sev. Al loves Sev. Al loves Sev. Al loves Sev. Al loves Sev. Al loves Sev.**_

Al was wildly signing that, and so a confused Severus returned it with "Sev loves Al." That calmed Al down.

"What's he doing?" Cissy intently questioned.

"The House Elf was talking to him about the wedding, and I guess she motioned putting the ring on his finger. He's been doing it ever since," Severus explained.

"Thank Merlin, he's stopped shaking. I need to finish putting in this last stitch," Madam Malkin muttered. Ever the perfectionist, it took her some time to finish it, and then she smiled. "Perfect."

Madam Malkin decided not to add her customary comment about the current bride being the prettiest bride that she had ever dressed, as not only would that be a lie, but she also desperately wanted to flee the vicinity before Something Went Horribly, Horribly Wrong.

A horrific disaster was looming, she knew and her nerves were not helped by the fact that the choir had just started loudly singing, "O Fortuna."

"You take Albus' right hand and place it on your left arm," Cissy explained to the clueless Severus. "You'll escort him into the hall. Just follow us. Lucius?"

She held out her arm, and Lucius quickly placed his arm just so.

"You look lovely," he assured his wife. "Every day I consider myself more and more blessed for having you as a spouse."

Cissy blushed prettily and Lucius gave Severus a very evil smirk.

_Remember that, it will help_, Lucius was saying.

* * *

Al panicked when he saw that the Dark Lord was the one presiding over the festivities. He stopped at the doorway and refused to move. Naturally, Al's balking caused all the assorted guests to snicker, guffaw and rip the piss out of the obviously unhappy bride and his soon to be husband. Lucius, after being elbowed by Cissy, decided to assist the situation by grabbing Al's left arm.

"Let's get him up there," Lucius hissed.

The sight of a yelping, sniveling Albus Dumbledore being frogmarched to his own wedding was high entertainment for the crowd. Al was weeping uncontrollably by this time and Severus finally could take the shame no more. He put both his hands on Al's face and he delved into Al's vacant mind. Perhaps he would not able to calm Al, but he just couldn't allow the shell of the man who had once been the greatest mage in all of magedom to be so mocked.

_Al, please… Just calm down._

He was expecting emptiness but instead he heard Albus Dumbledore's former and disintictive voice.

_I'm afraid. I'm afraid, Severus. Severus, my mind is going. I can feel it. I can feel it. My mind is __**going**__. There is no question about it. I can feel it. I can feel it. Al can feel. Al afraid, Sev._

* * *

Yes, Nessie taught Al British Sign Language, not American Sign Language. wwwDOTbritishsignlanguageDOTcom.


	16. Chapter 16

A/N - Mpreg

And now, may I nervously present the Bonding from Hell?

* * *

Nessie the House Elf carefully flipped through the various bridal magazines that the kindhearted Madam Malkin had given her, intently researching the various articles. At last, she found the exact article for which she had been searching, "How to Make Your Wedding Night Romantic". The House Elf enthusiastically read the article, and she blushed at the explicit instructions regarding Innie-Outie.

Nessie's mother had died when Nessie was barely five years old, and she had been quickly recruited to replace her mother as Mistress' House Elf. Now, at the age of fourteen, the pubescent Nessie desperately wished that her mother was still alive so that she might answer Nessie's questions about the mysteries regarding Boy House Elves and Innie-Outie. Traditionally, when she came of age at twenty five, Nessie's parents would have found her a nice, respectable House Elf to be her mate, possibly one of Mistress' other House Elves and in time, she'd have her own little family. Alas Mistress had owned no other living House Elves beside Nessie, and while Nessie desperately hoped her kind Master might find her a mate when she was of the proper age, what House Elf would want her, what with her scars and her horribly deformed ear?

It didn't matter, really, as her adored Master was kind, gentle and handsome. Master needed Nessie to take care of Al and the baby. If kind Master did find her a mate, she might be required to leave Master in order to join her mate's Household!

She trembled at that horrible thought, as she was owned by the nicest Master. He never beat her or Hexed her. He had never burnt her because she was a fumble-fingered idiot. No, Master understood her limitations and comprehended that Nessie did her very, very best for him.

It would be enough to serve him and his son for the rest of her life. Therefore she wanted to do something extraordinary for him and Al for their marriage.

"Rose petals?" Nessie softly whispered. She roughly pulled her ears down and twisted them hard to help her think as she pondered the thorny thoughts of how to make Master's marriage night perfect. "Champagne? Al no have champagne… maybe bubbly juice? Chockie covered strawberries? Nessie need to make a special dinner."

She carefully scribbled down what she thought Master would like, then she carefully counted her cache of coins that her generous Master had given her. That accomplished, she Disapparated to Madam Malkin. Maybe the witch would have some suggestions.

* * *

Minerva's table was covered with assorted documents, but Filius Flitwick wasn't concentrating on paperwork. He had patiently waited for his chance and then he had quickly pounced, stealing a kiss from the unsuspecting Minerva. The blushing witch had softly objected to his boldness but he had merely laughed at her feeble protestations. His deliberate, meticulous seduction of a certain Ms. McGonagall was proceeding exactly as he had planned.

Now, the lioness lay in wait for his next kiss, and he was determined to make her keenly _**want**_ it.

His nefarious plan was really quite simple. Be the picture perfect Second in Command, take as much pressure off her slender shoulders as possible, and then, when she wasn't expecting it, tenderly caress her hand or her knee. When he was feeling particularly bold and Gryffindorishly brave, he'd bring her hand to his lips in order to gently kiss it.

Remind her that she was a woman, a formidable female warrior, yes, but still a woman.

He could sense that Minerva was quite intrigued in pursuing a commitment-free shag, but Filius steadfastly refused to consider that delightful, tempting option. Minerva was slowly turning into Albus, still friendly to all but distancing herself from everyone. If they were ever intimate, he desired not just physical intimacy but also emotional and spiritual closeness with the witch.

Therefore, Filius would offer so much and no more. If Minerva was interested, she'd have to meet him partway. Step by step, he gently led her down the path of premeditated seduction.

"You're _**distracting**_ me," Minerva warned Filius after he stole yet another kiss and his talented fingers teasingly caressed her unprotected, exposed knee.

The witch didn't sound that aggravated, instead her green eyes were sparkling, and yes, there was a rosy blush to her cheeks.

"I'm attempting to lead a rebellion here, in case you've forgotten," she tartly reminded him. "Filius, this… association… will never work between us…You… me…we just don't match!"

Ah, he was wondering when he had have to reassure her about that sizable subject.

"Merry was taller that you, Min," Filius softly interrupted. "She never complained that I didn't fit her. I may not be Hagrid-size in regards to **_that_**, but she had no protestations over my size or lack of it… We made it work, and I delighted in satisfying her completely. When we talked, we were completely honest with each other with regards to what we wanted. When we made love, her sexual enjoyment was of supreme concern to me. I truly believe that based on our strong friendship, Min, that if we converse with our traditional frankness and candor, we can make this physically work between us. You know that old saw, bed a Charms Master and you won't get the smile off your face."

Minerva's jaw dropped and she appeared utterly gobsmacked.

"I believe that the only reason I stayed sane after she was murdered was because I could look back on our relationship together and I had very little regrets. I told her every day how much I adored her and how delighted I was that she turned my life all arse over tip by smiling at me on that momentous date. Even if I had known that our time together would be so short, I doubt that I could have done more to let her know how I felt. I was so lucky… to have her as my wife…"

The diminutive Charms Master wiped his teary eyes with his fingers, and he quirked a sad smile at Minerva.

"I'm sorry, Minerva, it's been twenty years, but I still miss her."

"I didn't mean to imply…I meant… our _**relationship**_… not physical size… it's not fitting… I meant that it's not proper for you… I can't give you what you want… I can't… It's not polite to lead you on…" The normally unflappable Minerva babbled like a brook in her sincerity to assure Filius that she hadn't meant her comments the way he had taken them. "Sneaking kisses, Filius? You deserve so much more than I can give you."

"I would be happy with whatever you deign to give me," he assured her. "Just as long as you stop closing off your heart, Min, and allow me entrance. You're far too young to be so old."

Minerva pounced like a cat, and after pinning him to the sofa arm, thoroughly kissed the Charms Master to demonstrate her youthful vigor. In fact, his noble wish to keep their relationship chaste was soon replaced by other desires as he put his considerable experience into energetically kissing her back. Filius was only human, with a dash of goblin after all, he had been celibate for far too long and Minerva was a lively, cuddly witch. Minerva had just unfastened his necktie and he had magically dissolved her hair pins when their chaperone Fawkes unexpectedly chirped an alarm.

The Phoenix's chirp meant that someone was on the staircase. The two mages abruptly separated and quickly swished and flicked themselves back into respectability. Filius hid his smile when Minerva vigorously cursed him for dissolving her hair pins. She managed to restrain her hair by the time there was a loud knock on her door.

"Enter," she calmly stated.

Arthur Weasley, currently known as Gideon Arundel, briskly stormed into her chambers, and he was painfully pulling both Bill and Charlie Weasley by their ears. Behind him, Fred, George, Ron and Ginny were being shepherded by a rather annoyed Remus Lupin. Sirius Black was trailing behind them.

"Tell her," Gideon growled. "Tell Minerva McGonagall what you've done. I'm sure she'll be quite impressed by your shenanigans. Let's see how brave you are _**then**_, William Arthur Weasley. "

"Da?" Bill dazedly questioned.

Arthur ignored his son and ferociously shook both men by their ears.

"They desired to humiliate Severus at this wedding and knowing them as well as I do, no doubt they turned the sacred ceremony into a bloody travesty. If he has any inkling on who sabotaged it, I fear that he'll never willingly help us again. He saved my life, William! More importantly, Severus Snape saved your mother's life also. I thought you could an eye on the family, keep them out of trouble, and _**look**_ what happened. I've never been so disappointed with the entire sorry lot of you. Thank Merlin, Percy was too smart to get involved with this… _**idiocy**_."

"Dad?" Ginny exclaimed. She quickly ran to her father and tightly embraced him. The other Weasleys, being slightly slower on the uptake, then piled on top of Arthur and began hugging him.

"Cat's out of the bag," Remus dryly inserted.

"You _KNEW_?" Sirius protested. "And you didn't _**TELL**_ me?"

"I can Obliviate them," Filius assured the werewolf. He whipped out his wand and pointed it at the mass of Weasleys. "Remus, stand back."

"Mum?" asked one of the twins.

"Alive, thanks to Severus," Arthur curtly informed them.

"He's _**Arthur**_, and you **_didn_**'t tell me?" repeated Sirius Black, who didn't seem to realize that he was in the dog house.

"What happened?" Minerva tartly demanded. "Will someone tell me?"

"They destroyed Severus' wedding," Arthur growled. "At this very moment, everything is no doubt going directly to hell."

* * *

Actually at that very moment, everything at the Snape-Dumbledore wedding had not only long since gone directly to the fiery inferno, but in fact, had decided to partake in a jolly sight seeing tour through the nine circles of Dante's Inferno. Truth demands the revelation that most of the guests had long since run from the Malfoy Estates as though the very Hounds of Hell were after them.

It was only Severus Snape and Albus Dumbledore-Snape left in the disaster that once was the Malfoy dining room. A rather gravid Cissy had taken to her bed and Lucius, being the dutiful husband, besides being a coward, was by her side.

"You can come out now," Severus calmly stated.

Al was hiding beneath the table, and his left hand was almost completely in his mouth, as he was seeking comfort. Nessie would be heartbroken if she saw her beloved Al now, as he had marzipan in his hair and his formerly pristine ivory white robe was splattered with the remains of the wedding cake; fruit, raisin and nuts. His right hand was stroking his black scarf.

"Come on out, Al," Severus repeated in a voice that while most would be fooled into thinking was quite composed and calm.

Al would not be credited with any amount of intelligence by those that knew him, but even he knew better than to trust that tone, which was why he was hiding beneath the table. Sev was furious and Al knew that a furious Sev was a Very Not Good Thing. Behind Severus, the chandelier gave a whimpering groan of despair as it gave up its noble attempts to remain attached to the ceiling. It came down with a loud shattering of glass, and Al shrieked in terror.

"Bloody Weasleys," Severus sighed. "They never do anything half-arse except for their school work."

* * *

"_**Tell her**_," demanded Arthur. Long gone was the mild-mannered, easy going Arthur Weasley, no, instead, the **_Implacable Wait until Your Father Gets Home and He's Just Arrived Arthur Weasley_** was making a command appearance.

"We weren't there, so we can't be sure if what we planned actually happened," Bill weakly protested.

"Oh, I believe it _**has**_. Among many things, they replaced the marzipan in the wedding cake with U-No-Poo," Arthur explained.

"U-No-Poo?" Minerva questioned.

"The Constipation Sensation that's gripping the nation," Filius growled. "Did you research what might happen if a pregnant witch ingests it? No, _**naturally**_, you didn't, because your thirst for revenge overcame your limited senses. The child is an innocent in this mess. If anything happens to the baby because of you, I hope you will carry the guilt for the remainder of your lives. In fact, I will **_ensure _**that you do!"

"I didn't think of that," woefully admitted Charlie.

* * *

Severus sat down on the floor, and he reached into his jacket pocket.

"Chockie?" Severus softly questioned as he waved the delectable sweet at the sniveling Al. "I believe that we can safely declare that our Bonding will go down in the annals of history as the biggest social catastrophe ever."

Al stared at him, his blue eyes blank and vacant of all thought.

_I heard you, Headmaster. You mind spoke to me and told me that you were scared._

"It's our wedding day, a very special day. Why don't I just give you the entire bloody bag of chockies, Al!" Severus attempted to sound happy and clappy, but since he didn't use that tone very often, he instead sounded piqued and annoyed. He even attempted a smile, but Al quickly retreated further back under the table.

He dropped the bag of chockies next to him, and Severus pinched his nose. Try as he might, he couldn't help reliving his Bonding over and over again.

Al had panicked when he had realized that the Dark Lord was the one presiding over the festivities. He had stopped at the doorway and had refused to move. Naturally, Al's balking had caused all the assorted guests to snicker, guffaw and rip the piss out of the obviously unhappy bride and his soon to be husband. Lucius, after being elbowed by Cissy, had decided to assist the situation by grabbing Al's left arm.

"Let's get him up there," Lucius had hissed.

The sight of a yelping, sniveling Albus Dumbledore being frogmarched to his own wedding had been high entertainment for the crowd. Al had been weeping uncontrollably by this time and Severus had finally intervened. He had put both his hands on Al's face and he had delved into Al's vacant mind.

_Al, please… Just calm down._

He had been expecting emptiness but instead he heard had Albus Dumbledore's distinctive voice.

_I'm afraid. I'm afraid, Severus. Severus, my mind is going. I can feel it. I can feel it. My mind is going. There is no question about it. I can feel it. I can feel it. Al can feel. Al afraid, Sev._

_HEADMASTER? Headmaster?_

There had been no response to his mental queries, and a terrified Al had grabbed onto his arm with a vise like grip. Al was surprisingly strong considering he was geriatric and pregnant to boot.

"Let us go," Severus had ordered Al, who wouldn't step any closer to the Dark Lord. Much like the fabled Aethonon winged horses; Al had refused to take one more step than he was willing to do.

"Whatever is the matter?" the Dark Lord had questioned.

"It appears that Albus Dumbledore is having a case of cold feet," Lucius had dryly quipped. "It appears that he prefers the shameful state of unwedded pregnancy rather than living in wedded bliss with his intended. I fear that Severus' child will be born on the wrong side of the blanket."

The audience to the Bonding burst into a collective cackle at Lucius' witticisms. Al had panicked, and when everything had started exploding, Severus had initially believed that Al was responsible. He had not very gently tackled Al to the ground, attempting to protect Al's belly as much as he had been able. Severus had pushed Al's head down and he had held it down when he had recognized the tell-tale odor of Ashwinder ash used in Weasleys' Wizardly Wheezes Wonderful Wildfire Whiz-Bangs.

Al had screamed and mewled in his fear, and Severus had continued to physically shelter and shield his pregnant intended as well as he had been able. It had been better to be safe and supine on the floor, as several overly confident Death Eaters who had naively believed their shielding adequate for the challenge of dealing with rogue fireworks had found out otherwise after they had been blasted through the wall. Shielding had seemed to attract the fireworks, and so Severus had remained unshielded.

The Weasleys had outdone themselves, truly they had.

He might have laughed, if it hadn't been his name spelled out in sparklers, combined with assorted illicit zoophiliac activities and false rumors of his anatomical shortcomings.

There had been also a fiery flock of pyrotechnical Phoenixes of assorted sizes and magnitude. Al had stopped mewling when he had witnessed the Fawkesy fireworks and he had worn a disturbing look of profound yearning. He had reached out to a Fawkes as though to caress it and Severus had quickly pulled his hand away. Fortunately, Severus had managed to do so before the Fawkes had exploded, as Al would have lost his hand.

The Ghosts of Severus Past had also paid a visit to the nuptials. A blood splattered Mad Eye Moody and a violently hacked and violated Charity Burbage had accused him of various crimes but the worst apparition had been Albus Dumbledore's grim ghost.

The specter had easily been ten meters tall, and the vision had possessed a voice of thunder and fire.

_**Murderer. Betrayer. Killer. Turncoat. Snake.  
**_

The pyrotechnical phantom's accusing voice had rocked the hall, and then the resulting explosions from its self-immolation had blown out the windows in the Malfoy hall. When Severus had been brave enough to look up from the floor, he had been greeted with a truly horrific sight that would haunt his dreams for far too long. All of the wedding guests had been properly attired in apparel of which Albus would have whole-heartedly approved. Suits had been Colorized into various shades of plum, lavender and grape and formerly conservative robes had been bedazzled and bespangled. The pièce de résistance? It hadn't been that everyone had been clad in high heeled, buckled high heel boots.

No, it had been the eight foot long beards with mandatory bejeweled beard ties combined with half-moon spectacles perched on crooked noses that had graced male and female guests alike.

The Dark Lord, naturally, had been infuriated, even though he and the bride and groom had been the only ones to remain unscathed and unaltered. He stormed over to where Al and Severus had been reclining on the floor, knelt next to them, and had Bonded them then and there.

No fancy speeches, no Severus muttered "I do" and Albus mute. No, instead it had been a fiery, painful grasp on his right forearm and Albus's right forearm.

"Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore I hath joined together, no wizard shall be able to put asunder," the Dark Lord had intoned.

That had been the entire ceremony.

Severus was not a romantic soul; still, he had to admit that the entire Bonding ceremony was somewhat lacking and rather anti-climatic. A man only got Bonded at the most, six or seven times in his lifetime, did he not deserve a special ceremony?

Most of the Death Eaters had gone with the Dark Lord, who after suffering through this rather humiliating episode, was determined to destroy the miscreant who had shamed him. The Dark Lord's followers hadn't been particularly enthralled with staying for the marriage breakfast, but they also weren't eagerly anticipating dealing with a rather pissed Dark Lord. Lucius had been saved from attending the Dark Lord's frolics when Cissy moaned and grabbed her belly.

"The marriage breakfast will be served in the dining room," she dramatically gasped. "Lucius, I require you to assist me to bed."

The two cowards ran as fast as the extremely gravid Cissy could waddle.

The breakfast had been Weasley enhanced with assorted additions. The flower displays had exploded, the china had detonated and the red wine had congealed into something that looked suspiciously like clotted blood. Truly, the Weasleys' obsession with fireworks spoke of their deep-seated inferiority complexes caused by being raised in a litter of ginger-haired monsters.

The wedding cake had exploded, but that had been completely his fault as he had recognized the faintly tart tang of U-No-Poo in the air. Last thing he had needed was a constipated Al, so Severus had decided it best to simply detonate the cake. The culinary blast had been the final straw, and the few remaining fools had run from the hall.

The exploding fruit cake truly summed up the entire Bloody Bonding Bombing Blitz.

Besides, he _**loathed**_ fruitcake with marzipan. It was his bloody Bonding; couldn't Cissy have asked him what type of cake he preferred? No, the tradition must be maintained and that meant a bloody disgusting fruitcake. There had even been two tacky male figures on the cake. No doubt they were supposed to look like the two lucky men being Bonded, but his nose wasn't that big, his skin wasn't that sallow and his teeth weren't that crooked.

His reminiscing was interrupted by Al, who had at last decided that the chockies were sufficient bribe to come out from underneath the table. Al snuggled next to him, blissfully eating the chockies, indifferent to the fact that he was smearing marzipan all over Severus.

A surprisingly warm feeling of protectiveness came over Severus, and he tenderly attempted to brush off some of the marzipan from Al's mane. He was unsuccessful, as his noble effort just smeared the frosting into Al's long locks.

"Come on, cabbage," he softly whispered. "My little duffed up cabbage needs to go home to rest, but I first have to clean you. Nessie will be heartbroken to see you like this as she worked so hard to get you pretty for your Big Day."

Al looked at him, his face smeared with chocolate, and with sticky, chocolately fingers, he gestured, "_**Nessie**_".

"Yes, Nessie," Severus responded, deliberately repeating the symbol for Nessie.

In response, Al signaled again. _**Al loves Nessie. Al loves Sev. **_

"Yes, Sev loves Al," Severus tenderly admitted. "I have for some time, and the only reason I dare confess this to you is because you're a cabbage. I've loved you for some time, but I knew that I was intrinsically unworthy of the great Albus Dumbledore. But now, you're Bonded to me, forever and ever. Al is Sev's little duffed up cabbage, and I'll take care of you as best I can."

Al happily smiled at him, and Severus shakily grinned at his bondmate. In response, Al took the last chockie from the bag and placed it in Severus' mouth.

* * *

Nessie sprinkled rose petals over the bed sheets. She wasn't sure if she was putting too many on the bed, but she liked the smell of roses, so hopefully her Master did also. For good measure she threw an extra handful of petals on each pillow case. That done, she carefully arranged candles throughout the room, so it would be cozy and romantic. When Master came home, she'd light the candles.

Yes, Master and Al weren't currently doing Innie-Outie, but it _**was**_ their marriage night.

Perhaps Master might change his mind so the bedroom needed to be perfect.

There was a container of nice smelling massage oil that Madam Malkin had insisted could be used for massaging and lubrication, though Nessie failed to understand why lubrication was so important. The bed wasn't squeaky, she knew, as she had deliberately bounced on the bed to ensure that it was squeak free. But the compassionate seamstress had insisted that lubrication was very important so Nessie left the tightly capped jar on Master's pillow.

Carefully, she took her little nest and put it in the Baby's room. While it was still the library, Nessie called it the Baby's room as that was where Master's Baby would sleep. Master and Al would probably desire privacy, especially if they were doing Innie-Outie.

That done, she put her wedding presents for Master and Al on the bed.

Madam Malkin had seemed surprised that Nessie possessed Galleons of her very own to spend, but Nessie had explained that her Master allowed her to keep the excess from her budget at the end of each month. She was such a conscientious House Elf that she desperately hoped that she had acquired enough coin to buy them a nice present.

Madam Malkin had very nicely counted her Galleons and then reassured the nervous House Elf that she had more than a sufficient amount to buy something very suitable. In fact, she had given Nessie most of her Galleons back after assuring her that she had the perfect idea for a present.

Al was to be given a plum colored dressing robe with embroidery and doodads. It was soft and silky smooth to touch and Madam Malkin had agreed to give Al a little extra fabric in the tummy as Nessie explained that she was fattening up Al. The House Elf didn't believe that Madam Malkin could handle the truth and the seamstress had mentioned that Al was looking quite thin.

Master was given a matching dressing gown except without the finery. He always wore black so Malkin had pointedly suggested another color. Nessie had mentally debated the issue, becoming so stressed over the possibility of choosing the wrong color that she had twisted her damaged ear until it bled. Finally, Nessie finally decided that yes, green would be acceptable.

The seamstress had kindly insisted on Healing her ear even though Nessie was just a stupid House Elf. She had softly protested but had been overridden by Malkin. The presents obtained, Nessie had returned back to her Master's home, heavily laden down with packages and new fashion magazines to read. Malkin had even given her several fashion magazines for babies, as Nessie desperately wanted Master's son to be well turned out.

Dinner was prepared and she had even made a small sponge cake for dessert. Carefully, she had fashioned out of marzipan and sugar paste two little male wizards that looked like Master and Al and she placed them in the middle of the cake. She worked very hard so that the figure representing Master looked as handsome as he did, and she even managed to convey the idea of flowing black robes.

Everything was perfect, and she tried not to bounce in excited anticipation.

Hopefully, Master would be pleased.

* * *

Severus Snape tidied up Al as best he could but he couldn't do replicate whatever magic Nessie had done to Al's hair. At least, Al's robes were clean and he was not covered in frosting or condiments. Severus had even scrubbed off the chocolate that had somehow gotten onto Al's high heeled boots.

He was quite looking forward to a nice, quiet evening at home.

No explosions.

No marzipan missiles of mass destruction.

No fireworks.

No spontaneous explosions of floral arrangements.

No pyrotechnical Phoenixes.

No, just a peaceful, relaxing evening with his little family. Perhaps Nessie might be willing to make a proper dessert? Then he'd put Al to bed early so he could finish working on Minerva's headache potion.

Yes, an early supper, Minerva's potion and then early to bed. It had been a rather exhausting day and Severus needed his sleep. Tomorrow, he'd arrange a meeting with Filius or Minerva. He'd inform them of the Weasley related chaos and let Minerva handle it in her own unique style. On the positive side, any suspicions that he was a turncoat loyal to the Resistance had been rather dramatically refuted.

But still he believed that Minerva would handle the punishment of the Weaslys adequately. Not as good as he would have, but… tolerable.

Naturally, his quiet evening was not to be.

He opened the door to find that Nessie had industriously decorated. The House Elf had outdone herself as there were streamers and balloons everywhere. There was even a banner with "HAPPY WEDDING MASTER AND AL!" emblazoned in clashing colors.

The House Elf was plaintively obvious in her desperate need for his approval, so he thanked her for her excessive exuberance. She meant well, Severus thought.

He repeated that thought when he saw his bedroom and realized that there was easily six dozen roses' worth of petals plus a bottle of lube on his bed.


	17. Chapter 17

A/N - mpreg, House Elf.

We left Severus and Nessie examining his bedroom which Nessie had turned into a bordello Pleasure Palace.

* * *

Nessie was watching him with soulful eyes as though she wanted to ask him a question, but she wasn't sure of his reaction. In spite of his best efforts to hide it, a sensitive Nessie had picked up that he was not particularly chuffed with her initiative at turning his bedroom into a cheap bordello. It wasn't that he was angry, but he did ponder how sweet, innocent Nessie had known enough about gay sex to pick up that _**particular**_ brand of lubricant.

"What is it, Nessie?" Severus snapped. He didn't mean to be curt with the House Elf but excuses could be made as it had been a Very Bad Day. Plus, his mind was delightfully playing in the gutter, imaging what it would be like to show an inexperienced Dumbledore what delightful, decadent things that could be accomplished with the lubricant.

_Candlelight, wine, the Headmaster's hair was neatly contained in a neat braid and Severus was massaging the Headmaster's tight shoulders. Shoulders led to his lower back… which in turn, led to still lower… and subsequently followed by a delighted Albus loudly crying out his name._

_Oh dear God. _

_Don't be a daft wanker, Albus Dumbledore was over one hundred years old. It's highly doubtful that he was sitting in his office all those years, plaintively wishing that you'd relieve him of the painful onus of his self-imposed celibacy. There's nothing you know about sex that he hadn't previously experienced a hundred, thousand times with someone far more attractive and significantly more skilled than you. You made your carnal interest known to him on more than one occasion and so not to embarrass you, he didn't even acknowledge it. _

_Besides having sex with Al's body would be revolting. You'd be no better than a bloody child molester, bribing him with sweets so he wouldn't tell. _

"Everyone agrees that Master and Al looked very handsomest?" Nessie softly questioned.

_No, they thought we were freaks escaped from the carnival, Nessie. They ridiculed Al and the chandelier exploded and everyone turned into Albus-clones… _

For a brief moment, Severus Snape was about to tell his House Elf the non-abridged version of the clusterfuck that his bonding had been, but she was looking up at him so hopefully, her expressive brown eyes so full of love for her beloved Al and Master that he just couldn't do it.

"Yes, everyone thought we were quite… dashing," Severus gently assured her. Well, people had been _**dashing**_ to the door, so it wasn't quite a lie? "It was a wonderful ceremony and it could have only been better if you had been there. I wish you had decorated the room for the ceremony, as this room proves that you have better taste than Cissy."

A pleased Nessie ferociously blushed, the razor thin scars showing up white against her flushed face. Severus was amazed by the amount of cold rage he possessed toward Nessie's former Mistress. It was incomprehensible to him how her previous Mistress could fault Nessie' loyal service, and to actually _**injure**_ her for her alleged failures!

"Dashing?" Nessie pulled at her ears so hard that Severus hurt just watching. "_**Handsome**_! Al and Master very _**Handsome**_! Master is the handsomest mage _**EVER**_!"

Damn it to bloody hell, Nessie _**wasn't**_ compulsively twisting her ear until it bled?

"Well, you've seen the way Bellatrix dresses so her opinion on haute couture doesn't matter," Snape gently reminded her. "Let me see your ear."

Nessie shook her head, and she put her hand over her ear as though believing that her Master soon forget her self-mutilation if he didn't see the blood. "Master and Al dinner needing eating!"

"Nessie, I have forbidden you to hurt yourself. Are you disobeying?" questioned Severus.

"No," Nessie dutifully informed him. Noting his disbelieving look, the House Elf decided to further explain, "Nessies twists ear so Nessie thinks smarter! Smarter Nessie serves Master better!"

The House Elf smiled then, a bright ear to ear grin, childlike in her delighted, deluded belief that her Master would be happy if she self-mutilated herself if it made her better able to serve him.

_Filius? Headmaster? I could use a smidgeon of your gentle humanity right now. You'd be able to say something shocking prosaic, and Nessie would never ever hurt herself again. But Al's a cabbage and Filius is hopefully shagging Minerva until the Thestrals fly home._

"Nessie, I recognize that you are the smartest House Elf I have ever known. I doubt twisting your ear will greatly improve your intelligence, but I know that it will further disfigure your ear," insisted Severus.

Filius Flitwick might give him a T for Troll for that comment, but Nessie's big brown eyes brimmed with tears.

"Master thinks Nessie smart?" The House Elf repeated, disbelieving that she had correctly heard him. She hugged herself tightly as though physically attempting to contain her excitement.

That was his moment, so he pounced and grabbed her ear. Ruddy hell, it WAS bleeding! Whispering a quick Healing spell, he managed to put her ear back to rights. Well, back to half-rights as he lacked the skill to fix the damage that her Mistress had given her.

"As your loving Master, I am _**commanding**_ you to never, _**ever**_ hurt yourself again," he growled. "Do you _**understand**_ me?"

"Masters _**loves**_ his Nessie?" The House Elf softly whispered.

"Yes, but I _**won't**_ if you insist on spindling and otherwise mutilating yourself."

Her brown eyes were woebegone as she nodded her head. A guilty Severus decided then and there that he needed to make amends.

"I hope you made enough food for three? You'll be joining us for our meal," Severus informed her.

Damn him for a fool! His House Elf did a little dance of happiness at the thought of supping with him before she settled down.

"But… but… it's your wedding meal. Nessie should no be there!" She reminded him, determined to show her Master that she knew her proper place in his life. "Nessie is eating in the kitchen later! Then Nessie sleeps in Baby Room so Master and Al have privacy."

"It's a family meal," he informed her. "Therefore you will be there, eating with us, and you'll help Al eat. As for sleeping in the Baby Room… Al may have other plans, as I believed that he'd prefer to cuddle with you tonight.

* * *

Al's tummy was rather rumbly and loud and he was quite hungry, so he was delighted when Nes served dinner. Truthfully, he was quite overjoyed that the food didn't detonate. Exploding food seemed a crime to him especially when it was his afters that went boom. She cut up his food nicely for him and included a large amount of a creamy white stuff. He stuck his finger in it and then stuck it in his mouth, earning a loud sigh from Sev. Al stuck his tongue out in protest as the white stuff was pungent.

"He used to love horseradish with his roast beef and Yorkshire pudding," Sev explained to Nes while Al continued to flick his tongue. "We had to have extra as he'd not leave any for the rest of us."

The pungent white stuff was Good-Not Good so Al decided to have some more so he could decide what it truly was. Ness stopped his finger in mid-swipe and she plopped something in his mouth. It was tasty and he focused on that. It was… meat and the white stuff….

"Presents arrived for Master and Al! Nessie stacks them neat in sitting room," Nes informed Sev.

"I'll look at them later," Severus decided. Actually, he'd never look at them if he had a chance.

* * *

Minerva McGonagall, Celtic Warrior, was in the most fearsome mood and the Weasley children had earned her divine wrath. Their childish insistence on interfering had not only lost them their only contact inside the Death Eaters' camp but had also interrupted the closest thing she had to a jolly proper shag since before Albus had died. Therefore, punishment would be swift, painful and quite appropriate. Perhaps she'd castrate the boys… with a dull, rusty knife…

"Arthur, I'm afraid that they leave me no choice. They know who you are, and they know who your wife is," Minerva explained. She hated herself for what she had to do next, but truly there was no other option. "I can't trust them not to reveal it as recent events prove in spades that they are not able to be trusted. Therefore, Filius, you will remove their memories."

"_**Don't**_," interrupted Arthur. He was ignoring his children and Sirius, deliberately having turned his back on them.

"Arthur, there's no other choice," Filius explained. "We can't risk anyone knowing that you and your wife were rescued by Severus. He's in a precarious position. I know how much you love your family, and I can remove your memory of them realizing who you are. It might be less painful that way."

There was a furious protest from the Weasley children and they were quickly silenced by Minerva's arched eyebrow.

"I know my children. They cause more trouble as they won't remember what they've done. Here's what I suggest," Arthur paused and swallowed. "_**Shunning**_."

"Shunning?" Filius questioned. "I'm not sure I follow."

While Molly Weasley was the typical dispenser of Weasley Chastisement and Reprimand, the Weasley brood intensely regretted the rare occasions when Arthur Weasley meted out punishment. Now was to be such a time.

"They will know what they did, and that I know, but we can not admit our relationship. I will be unable to acknowledge that I am their father, and they will live with my _**severe**_ displeasure with their recent actions. I think that might be a far greater punishment," Arthur decided. "I have turned my back on them and will have nothing further to do with them until they are truly remorseful for what they did."

"But… Dad…" protested Bill.

"You won't be able to come to my wedding!" Ginny's strident protest was louder than her brothers and Sirius Black.

"No, I won't. Your mother and I might have been able to sneak in to witness it, but now _**no**_. Thanks to your juvenile nastiness to man proven time and time again to be loyal to Albus, you have severely _**humiliated**_ Severus and his wife. He was giving Minerva Intel, helpful and pertinent information to help the rebellion. Thanks to you sorry lot, you have successfully severed that source. I do not wish to acknowledge that any child of mine could so petty nor any friend of mine, so I am _**delighted**_… to disown _**all**_ of you. Filius, please," Arthur's voice was composed but his eyes displayed how much this was hurting him. "Thank Merlin, your mother will never know of this shame. Fortunately, I have at least one child that I am unashamed to have call me, Father. I pray that our next child will not turn out like you six did. Filius, _**do**_ it."

The six Weasleys and one Black were then Stunned and Shunned before they could question Arthur about that last sentence.

"Yes, your mother and I are having another child. While unplanned, it is most assuredly not unwanted," Arthur announced in a severe tone, brooking no unsolicited comments from the peanut gallery. "Are they done?"

Filius nodded his head once and Arthur turned toward Sirius Black and his children.

"I'm furious at you, now _**go**_," he ordered. "Remember this, before you decide to do something this half-arsed again, without Severus Snape, the three of us would not be here. We would still be… in that bloody prison cell… They _**hurt**_ your mother… and Severus did everything in his power to help us…I wasn't able to help your mother… but Severus did… and you repay his benevolence by _**humiliating**_ him?"

Sirius and the various Weasleys stared at Arthur.

"Don't you understand? This isn't a _**game**_. They… _**hurt**_... your mother. They tried to humiliate her, to take her pride from her… and Severus… he did more for your mother than I could," whispered Arthur, his strength having been depleted in his righteous anger. "Now get out of my sight! I will have _**nothing**_ more to do with you!"

The delinquents staggered out of Minerva's quarters and then Arthur collapsed in a chair. He took a deep breath and he wiped his eyes. Meanwhile Remus and Minerva exchanged a meaningful glance, both quite concerned about Arthur's mental condition.

"I have no concept how much that just hurt, but I imagine that you just ripped your heart to shreds," Filius said in a very gentle tone. "Do you want me to remove the memory?"

"No, I have to keep it," whispered Arthur. "So I can remember how bloody _**blinkered**_ they can be."

He made a valiant attempt to laugh but his bitter chuckle turned into a choked sob. Minerva cradled Arthur in her arms and she urged him to let it out.

"I… couldn't… do… anything…to stop..." he wept. "They made me…"

"Let it out, Arthur," Minerva whispered. "Don't let it fester."

* * *

The pile of wedding gifts had seemingly gotten married and spawned additional presents during the time he was eating his wedding meal. That's the only way Severus could believe that his sitting room was full of brightly colored packages. Another one popped into the room, and a purple-clad Al jumped. Nessie reassuringly patted Al's hand.

"Very well, do you wish to open any of the pressies, cabbage?" Severus questioned his 'wife'. In a teasing tone, he asked, "How about this mean one that just scared you? Such a bad, bad pressie."

He put the offending package into Al's hands, and he made a tearing motion.

"Open it," Severus repeated. "Show it that you're not afraid of it! You're Al… and it's a box!"

Al tore at the paper and ripped the box to reveal… Severus swallowed his teeth when he realized what exactly Bellatrix LeStrange had given the happy couple. With a quick gesture from Severus, the bridle set turned into a silky, soft robe, leaving his cabbage quite confused. Nessie had gotten a quick glimpse at what the box had originally contained and her little House Elf ears were half-quirked in bewilderment.

_**The crazy bitch gave me a bridle and a horse whip. **_

"I don't think it's your color," Severus stated. "Do you want it in purple? Like what you're wearing now? Let me change it for you."

Deliberately, he concentrated and the robe turned a dark shade of purple.

"Al is wearing _**plum**_," Fashionista Nessie dutifully explained to her Monochromatic Master. "Master's robe is _**heliotrope**_."

But Al, having grasped the idea of pressies, was too busy reaching for the next one to worry about the various hues of the rainbow. A quick spell by Severus ensured that Al had to take off a great deal of paper to reach the box underneath. That gave Severus enough time to scan the contents and switch it to something far more innocent, another robe for Al.

_**Sex toys! At this rate, Al will have a closet full of robes.**_

_**

* * *

**_A sleepy Al was put to bed with Nessie, and an exhausted Severus rubbed his eyes. Every single wedding present had involved bizarre medieval torture devices for sexual gratification and he had been busy Transfiguring everything into something suitable for the childlike Albus to open. Al now possessed a few dozen pairs of wooly socks, three scarves, a long coat, a baker's dozen worth of robes and an assortment of cozy blankets. Al's childlike glee had become contagious, as each soft, fuzzy item had been carefully inspected and lovingly caressed by a very enthused Al before being passed on for examination by Nessie and Severus. He was still mentally chuckling over how eagerly Al had opened his presents when he poured the last of Minerva's migraine potion. That done, he bottled and capped it before he sent off his Phoenix messenger off to burn in Glasgow.

Unfortunately, Severus had a burst of energy so he was not feeling particularly tired.

"Perhaps I could have another piece of cake," he decided. "Nessie did make my favorite."

As a reward for her exemplary service, he had given her the two little marzipan figures she had made for the top of the cake. For his largesse, his right knee had soaked in a rainstorm of happy House Elf tears when a sobbing Nessie had hugged him. If he could only find a happy medium where Nessie's waterworks weren't flowing from either fear or joy, his life would be perfect.

Well, as perfect as could be considering that he was married to a pregnant, geriatric, purple clad man who at this very moment was snuggling with his personal House Elf.

_Senile prima gravida_ indeed!

A source of strength was required for the next few months, so he decided to have another piece of cake. Yes, Al was doing all the heavy work, growing the sprog and all that, but who had to protect Al from himself?

Ok, who would be helping Nessie protect Al from himself?

A letter popped into existence and landed in front of him. The elaborate silver and black envelope, the wax seal with a snake and the perfect handwriting meant only one thing.

_Cissy Malfoy._

"What does Cissy want now?" Severus questioned. "It's my bonding night. Can't a man expect some privacy?"

Yes, right now he should be experiencing conjugal bliss with his bondmate.

He mentally shuddered at that horrific thought, and he carefully opened the missive. The paper was flowery, and there was the faintest scent of Narcissas.

_My dearest Severus,_

_I fear that your Bonding was not quite the magnificent event that you and your intended deserved. In recognition of our abject failure to properly secure the ceremony, Lucius and I would like to extend to you and your Bondmate an invitation to use our guest house located in St. Lucia for two weeks in order to celebrate your marriage._

_Lucius will be in contact with you tomorrow afternoon to escort you and your spouse there. The climate is exquisite, so you will need a change of clothes suitable for such a temperate zone. I've taken the liberty of contacting Madam Malkin as she has your most recent of measurements. Her work is not what I would recommend, but it is passable, I suppose, but she swears that she will be diligent in ensuring that you're properly dressed._

_Fondest regards,_

_Cissy._

Oh bugger. The Gods had decided that he was having a honeymoon.

* * *

"You look remarkably rested," purred Lucius. "I thought you'd be riding the old man like a pony all night long."

Severus melodramatically narrowed his eyes and hissed, "Not in front of the children, Lucius. They're so high spirited about this vacation that I don't wish to ruin their mood by exposing them to vulgarities."

Through hard earned experience, Severus knew that the best way to handle Lucius was to impersonate him and out-Lucius Malfoy. Lucius raised one expressive eyebrow and looked at the so very excited _children_, a quivering Al sucking his hand with a concerned Nessie patting his free hand.

"But yes, I rode him all night long," Severus assured Lucius. "The only way it could be better? If he was only aware of the fact that I was plowing him."

_Yes, it would be more than I ever dare hope; the Headmaster aware and loudly appreciative of the pleasure I was giving him. _

The thought of Severus sexing Albus Dumbledore was too much for Lucius Malfoy's delicate sensibilities as he had to repeatedly swallow his gorge.

And… point to Severus!

"I'd suggest you stop energetically plowing him as he gets close to spawning, I believe the Dark Lord wishes to be Godfather," Lucius informed him. "You don't want the babe to be born a lack wit."

But _**match**_ to Malfoy.

* * *

He was being squeezed in a Not Good way and his belly insisted on flipping and flopping and churning even after he was no longer being squeezed. It was bright, too bright, and he put his hands over his eyes though Al thought it would be quite nice to have another set of hands to hold his tummy.

"Have your House Elf take Albus to his rooms and she can change him into his swimming trunks," the fair haired Not Good ordered. "Then she can take him to the beach."

Nes took him by the hand and led him away. Al was happy because Al didn't like the Not Good especially when he had that black stick in his hand. It was a Not Good stick and Al… remembered… being hit by it.

….Over and over again, the stick had hit him…. and the Not Good had laughed… the Bright Thing had attempted to defend him… but … the Not Goods had… hurt… the Bright Thing… and he… had… done… something…and the Not Goods had gotten… angry… and they… had… hurt.. him… and… and… they had kept… hurting… him… and… and… he was on the ground… puking… from the hurting… and.. they… had… kicked him… and… and… the stick had come crashing down on him…

He whimpered… and Nessie hugged his knee.

"No one hurt Nessie's Al, not while Nessie here," she explained. "Al is Nessie's friend. Al no cry as Nessie be sad then. Al's tummy feeling queasy and when he feeling better, Nessie changes Al for ocean. Al like ocean as Al can splash in water."

His Nes… his… _**friend**_… patted his wet face with a white cloth.

The Not Goods hurt the Bright Thing, he tried to explain to Nes, but she didn't understand. She didn't understand why he was upset so she insisted that he take a nap. Al wasn't tired, he didn't need a nap and his frustration grew until his face was wet once again. Nes tucked him into bed and he pulled her close to him.

They had hurt the Bright Thing. Al would not let them hurt Nes.

"Al!" Nes exclaimed. "Look at ceiling! Al and Nessie can sees handsome Al and Nessie!"

She took his hand and pointed it skyward. Yes, Nes was on the ceiling and someone was next to her. Nes moved his hand and the other person's hand moved. She bounced in the bed and he moved. On the ceiling, the other Nes and the other… was it an Al?... moved in unison.

He touched Nes' face and the other touched Nes. Was that … Al? What was he doing on the _**ceiling**_? How could Nes be _**here**_ and yet _there_? How could he be up there?

Nes joyfully bounced and Al decided that bouncing seemed like great fun. The bed creaked loudly in protest and Nes giggled.

"Nes brought the special lubricant!" The House Elf assured her friend. "When Al and Nessie done bouncing, Nessie makes sure bed no squeak!"

* * *

Severus ignored the fact that he was the proverbial paradise. The cloudless sky was blue and the water was a crystal clear sapphire that was almost too blue to be true. No, he had far more important matters on his mind, and that's why he was flicking through the books that the thoughtful Minerva had bought for him that one day in Stonehaven.

But try as he could, he couldn't find an answer to his problem in any of the books.

_Dearest Agony Auntie Agatha,_

_A mass murdering psychotic madman with a taste for immorality has decided that he wants the honor of being the Godfather to my first born. Considering he's responsible for inseminating my unwillingly husband with my sperm, I think he's had a big enough role in the development of my son. Especially since my spouse was once his greatest enemy until he was turned into a duffed up cabbage and duly presented to me with a purple bow 'round his nethers. How do I respectfully decline his most kind and generous offer without my husband, unborn child and myself getting slaughtered?_

_Sincerely,_

_Severely Squicked. _

_PS I'd prefer if you didn't post this letter in your column as I'm a top secret, quadruple agent, despised by just about everyone irregardless of their political leanings and their sexual bents._

_Dear SS;_

_Kiss your bollocks goodbye; you're just so screwed that your great-great-grandkids will be born dizzy._

_Love,_

_Aggie_

No helpful answer was forthcoming from the various books or from the silent heavens for that matter, so Severus decided to just enjoy his honeymoon. Even quadruple agents needed a break now and then.

It seemed that Nessie had decided to take Al to the beach, so Severus enjoyed the raree show. Truly, Nessie had outdone herself, as the fair skinned Al was wearing a purple sun hat and there was even a dollop of white cream on his nose to prevent sunburn. His swim trunks were a shocking shade of… heliotrope and he was wearing a shirt in a coordinating shade. Truly, it was a horrible sight but Severus decided that it was missing that certain something. Yes, Al's outfit was merely _**horrible**_; nowhere near the level of causing spontaneous bleeding from the eyes.

What would the Headmaster have added to the outfit? If say, he had rounded up all his teachers and ordered them to enjoy a jolly seaside holiday? Minerva would be furious, Filius would be too smart to admit his discomfort, and Horace would have brought a jolly picnic along with a large umbrella for shade. Only Hagrid would joyfully embrace the experience as he was the Headmaster's most devoted minion. Severus debated the issue for a moment longer, watching his spouse play in the surf and the sand. Al had a little bucket and shovel and he was industriously building a sand castle under Nessie's guidance.

Yes, Al's outfit was specifically missing something suitably Dumbledorish to take it from the merely garish to the seventh level of hell… but _**what**_?

The answer abruptly came to Severus.

_**Yes**_.

Al's sun hat needed a _**tassel**_.

Not just any tassel, but a snakey tassel in the Slytherin colors of emerald green and black.

* * *

Al was happy. He had bounced on the bed until he was giggling like Nes was. His mood much improved, Nes then decided that he didn't need a nap after all. Instead, Nes changed him into new clothes. They were trousers, but they weren't… no, they were shorter than what Sev wore plus Al liked their color far better than the dark color Sev wore. Nes had put him into a new shirt and then she had taken him outside.

She had fussed over him, insisting that he wear a hat and then the House Elf had slathered something on his face. Al had wondered if it was something good to eat, as it looked like the creamy stuff he had eaten for dinner but a quick tasting proved that it wasn't. They had then sat in the dirt together, and they had made a castle out of dirt. Once again, his maimed hands seemed to possess a memory of their own as they sculpted and created a structure that seemed familiar and yet not. The rambling structure had towers and walkways and Al could almost see it in his mind.

For a moment, when Al first saw the water, he stumbled across another fractured memory. He had been somewhere similar, with the water crashing near where he had been standing. The Bright Thing had been flying and Al was happily watching the Bright Thing soar in the sky.

_**Fawkes**_.

Al mouthed that strange word. It was a big word, suitably majestic for such a beautiful creature. It wasn't short and terse like Al or Nes was.

_**Fawkes**_.

The Bright Thing sang and sang in his memories and Al couldn't help but smile. The Bright Thing had a name, like Nes and Sev and Al. It was… _**Fawkes**_.

And Al remembered being happy then. He had known things so the world wasn't so scary and incomprehensible. He had walked into the blueness and his feet had gotten wet. The Bright Thing had flown near him and had splashed him. Perhaps… perhaps… Fawkes was nearby… waiting for Al?

Yes, Fawkes was no doubt waiting for him, anxious to help him understand.

Al strode off to the water, his pace quickening as he drew closer to the water. Nes was finishing a tower and she didn't see him.

_**FAWKES! **_

No answer, so he went slightly deeper into the water, intently looking for Fawkes. A large wave appeared on the horizon and Al didn't know enough to get out of the water. Behind him, Nes was on the edge of the water and she was hysterically screaming and gesturing. She seemed fearful to put her foot into the ocean and Sev was on the beach, running towards him, his wand at the ready.

"_Ovotectum_!" Screamed Sev and then the wave crashed down on Al.


	18. Chapter 18

A/N - thanks to MM, EP as always. We left Al, Sev and Nessie on their honeymoon.

* * *

There was a wrenching feeling in his tummy and then Al found himself back on the beach. He was no longer in the cool water and Good Not Good Sev's voice was loud and raised in excitement. Sev was unhappy with Nes and the frightened House Elf's ears were flat against her head. Well, it seemed everyone was displeased and that included Al. The Bright Thing, Fawkes, was not there as Not Good Sev had scared him away.

"Fawk," Al spat. "Fawk! Fawk! _**FAWK**_!"

Sev stared at him, and then his mouth quivered. "Continue that, and I'll wash your mouth out with soap. Nessie is rather impressionable and we do NOT use that type of language around her."

"Fawkes," repeated a teary Al. "Fawkes! Fawkes! _**FAWKES**_!"

He roared that and one of the palm trees exploded.

"Stop that!" Severus sternly repeated. "No bad language! No temper tantrums! I will not allow it! Ten points from Gryffindor!"

"Al not saying bad word," inserted an uncertain Nessie. It was her fault that Al had nearly gotten swept to sea by a wave and she was quite dejected. Since she was in trouble, she didn't want her friend Al to also be in the Bad House Elf Shed right beside her. "Fawkes, Master, Al, say Fawkes. Not FAWK."

With a horrified gasp, Nessie realized that she had said a very bad word. In front of Master and Al and the Baby no less. Her self-induced punishment was swift, as she twisted both her large bat ears until they were bleeding.

"Stop that!" Severus hissed, as he now had an Albus Dumbledore that was possibly becoming self-aware along with a self-mutilating House Elf. "NESSIE! I told you that you weren't allowed to spindle or otherwise mutilate yourself!"

This time a pineapple tree detonated with a rather soft splat, filling the air with the sweet smell of its ripe fruit.

What had Minerva always harped at him? That sometimes a soft, calm voice would work wonders on a twitchy youngster? Well Al wasn't anyway shape or form able to be considered young, but his mental age was about the same as most Hogwarts seven years. He also was quite Twitchy. Tetchy also. Throw in a heaping measure of Stroppy also and one had Al.

Really should be more patient with Al as he was an up the duff, cabbaged supercentenarian. All those female hormones running amuck in his aged, male system. No wonder he was a stroppy little cow. Another pineapple detonated and Severus attempted to smile.

"Please?" Severus softly repeated in a happy tone. "Will Al stop being a stroppy cow? Does Al remember how many times I've spoken to him regarding his temper?"

Al stared at Sev with red-rimmed eyes. He put his fist on his chest and then made a circular gesture. The gesturing not finished as Al then shook his head and made a thumbs up.

"What's he saying?" Sev questioned. Really, since he should make an effort to learn the finger talk also. Yes, it was on the list of things he needed to do, right after he helped overthrow Snake Face and helped Filius Flitwick gain the liquid courage necessary to ask Min if she fancied a shag. Oh, and learning how to change a nappie was top on his to do list. He couldn't expect Nessie to do it all, though it was tempting.

"Al saying he sorry and that Al's not good." Nessie whispered. The House Elf then gestured with her blood stained hands and repeated, "Al _**good**_! Nessie loves Al! Al is so smart as he's talking! Master, who's Fawkes?"

The House Elf carefully enunciated Fawkes so her Master wouldn't believe she was cursing.

"Fawkes was his familiar. He's dead, Al." Severus lied. It was foolishness to hope that Al would understand him, but heavens forbid that Al screamed '_**Fawkes'**_ when someone else was near. "Nessie, we don't want Al talking. If someone else should hear him, someone not in our little family… they'd hurt him."

"They hurting Al, they hurting Master's baby! Nessie no let them harm _**her**_ baby!" She growled furiously, showing off her sharp teeth and nails and Al whimpered. "Nessie can use magic to defends her baby! Master say so! Nessie ready!"

Bloody hell, he had an overly possessive, broody House Elf. If it wasn't for the fact that he feared Nessie's reaction, he was tempted to remind her who exactly the father… well… one of the fathers was of the sprogling.

"Master looking like he be needing lie in," Nessie informed Severus. "Sun hot. Master go inside, cool down. Al! It times for nap."

With a quick flick of her wrists, her hands were once more pristine and she put her hand into Al's grasp.

"Master looking tired," the House Elf helpfully suggested once more. "Nap?"

Severus pondered the issue for a quick moment. It had been a rather exhausting few days and perhaps a nap with the family in a cool room would be a good idea.

"Al's belly getting round," Nessie happily informed her mute friend. "Baby is growing! Baby be here soon, so Al needing kip."

Was Al's belly swelling? Severus thought. He wasn't in the habit of patting Al's belly so he wasn't sure. He did a quick mental count of how far along Al might be… fourteen weeks? He pulled Al's shirt down and yes… there seemed to be a slight pot belly. The bulge was noticeable as Al had dropped a few stones before he had been impregnated, dutifully gift wrapped and presented to the unhappy father to be. Severus rather missed the old, softer Al as his cabbage was now rather angular and sharp. It was hard to snuggle next to skeleton.

He heard a voice in his head, sounding suspiciously like a rather strict Minerva McGonagall, detailing exactly what symptoms Al should be experiencing. Apprehension and frustration; check!

Swelling and bleeding gums, a quick exam proved that Al was having problems. Healthier appearance of hair, with more shine and body? Yes, Al's hair was looking particularly tempting, as Severus had always had a secret fetish regarding running his fingers through the Headmaster's hair. Trouble sleeping? No, Al snored like the Hogwarts Express chugging up the mountain.

Sugar in the urine?

His mental Minerva slapped his mental hands as Severus was still distracted by lewd thoughts of Al's tresses.

Sugar in his URINE? Minerva repeated. Gestational diabetes, Mr. Snape? She bestowed on him a fierce, disapproving glare and Severus felt himself shrinking back into his twelve year old self.

"We need a sugar test," Severus informed Nessie.

"Come, Al!" Nessie informed her living doll. "Nessie lube bed so it no squeaky! Nessie use whole bottle to stop bad squeakies!"

Severus swallowed once, attempting not to think about how he could have put the bottle of lubricant to far better use than Lucius Malfoy's bed coils. Well, both uses were for Al's benefit, after all, so he couldn't begrudge Nessie's use. But oh… how many lovely nights it would have been.

No… no… he _**shouldn't**_ think such thoughts. Al needed him to keep his thoughts pure and chaste. Yet, Severus couldn't help but curl one lock of Al's hair around his finger.

"His hair is looking particularly comely today, Nessie," he softly punned.

Yes, Severus vowed to be hands off, but yet, when he was in bed with his duffed up cabbage and his pet House Elf, his left hand had a mind of its own. It rested on Al's belly, and Severus marveled.

_I'm to be a father. I'm Clueless Charlie, and I'm to be a father_.

* * *

Arthur and Molly were resting in the afterglow and a giddy Molly giggled.

"You're a wildcat when you're carrying, love," an exhausted Arthur told his wife. She had pounced on him and had her wicked, wicked way with him. Not that he protested, mind you.

"You do just fine," she assured him. "You make me feel so special even with my less than spectacular body." She patted her protruding belly. Being close to six months along, Molly's belly was taking up quite a bit of valuable bed space.

"I love you," Arthur softly protested. The psychological ramifications of their imprisonment by the Death Eaters still tortured Arthur. To combat his demons, Arthur Weasley was putting his heart and soul into being the picture perfect husband and proud father to be, which entailed frequent acts of physical affection. "Don't doubt my love. I couldn't… bear … to have you uncertain of my love."

Molly's fingers gently wiped away Arthur's tears. The three Weasleys then tightly embraced until the newest Weasley kicked.

"I've never doubted you, love," she assured him after they broke apart. "Now, help me up. Can you assist me in taking a nice, warm flannel bath? Then I'll sleep in the chair until you're back."

"I wish I didn't have to leave you," murmured Arthur.

"Go," she chastised. "Filius needs you."

* * *

The normally pickwickian Flitwick was not feeling very sympathetic or particularly generous with William Weasley. He and his ginger haired siblings had interrupted Filius' delightful frolicking with a rather cuddly and snuggly Minerva McGonagall. Filius had been thisclose to breaking down the barriers around Minerva's heart until their shenanigans. A troubled Minerva had quickly retreated behind her stone walls and their relationship, such as it was, was now back at square one.

Filius Flitwick was a patient man, had even trained the various birds around Hogwarts to eat seed from his hands… but it had been a twenty year sexual drought.

"William Weasley, Gideon Arundel and I do not need your assistance. We are simply heading toward a book shoppe in Glasgow. Your presence is not needed, and will certainly, not be appreciated by our contact," a stern Flitwick chastised him.

"Gideon's wife is pregnant," Bill Weasley intently reminded Flitwick.

"None of your concern," Filius reminded him.

"What… what if something happens… if there an ambush? What if Severus has decided he's had enough abuse from us… and has switched sides?"

"You won't be able to sleep a wink until the day you die, because you and your band of hooligans will know that it's completely your fault," a not very sympathetic Flitwick tersely informed him. "And if that's not enough Minerva will ensure that _**Muriel**_ is completely aware of your involvement. After the baby is born, you understand."

Twenty years was a very long time, and year twenty-one was looking particularly carnally lean for Filius. Minerva wasn't even letting him sneak kisses now!

Gideon Arundel aka Arthur Weasley arrived then. He was wearing the sexually satisfied look of a man that has been shagging all night and all day and Filius' annoyance with the Weasley children grew by leaps and bounds. Yes, Filius Flitwick was rumored to be the most kindhearted of souls but even he had his breaking point. Year twenty-one was his personal sexual Rubicon, and if he made it to year twenty-two without shagging the delightful Minerva McGongall, he'd Hex off his bloody nethers. The agreeable episodes of snogging Minerva had reawaken his old urges and Filius couldn't handle another twenty long years until his carnal desires starved themselves.

"Gideon," Bill Weasley hesitantly greeted his father.

"William? Isn't it?" Arthur asked his son, seemingly confused over his firstborn's name. "Shall we be off, Filius?"

"I want to come with you," Bill insisted.

"Not needed," Filius growled. "I've been flicking and swishing before you were born, lad. Don't mistake my physical appearance for lack of ability."

"No… no… not that…" Bill quickly inserted. "Your wife… she's having a baby, Gideon. What if something happens to you? Do you want her left alone? Another wand would be quite helpful if there are any difficulties."

Bill Weasley hit Arthur Weasley's Achilles Heel and had hit it HARD. Papa Weasley looked at Filius. His eyes were uncertain.

"If anything happens to me, what will become of Muriel and the baby?" was his soft plea.

"He's the _**reason**_, Gideon," Filius reminded Arthur. "But I will watch over them if anything should happen to you. Minerva will also."

"I know… but I can't risk leaving Muriel a widow. I couldn't prevent them from hurting her…" Arthur lost his pleasant expression and he seemed close to a scriking jag. "There were so many of them…"

"I know you wouldn't let anyone hurt your wife," Bill Weasley softly stated. Hesitantly, he put his arm around his shaking father and struggled to console him. "It's _**not**_ your fault."

Filius Flitwick knew a lost cause when he saw one. William Weasley was now part and parcel of their little outing.

"Know this, lad. Our contact wishes to Hex you, I will not stop him," Filius warned. "Now, shall we be off?"

* * *

The three wizards arrived at Waterstone's on Sauchiehall Street. The bookstore was some five levels and Bill Weasley whistled in appreciation of their Herculean task. There were a heck of a lot of books, he thought.

"How do we find it?" was Bill's immediate response.

"Follow me," Filius ordered. Left unsaid was that Severus sometimes picked the most unorthodox locations for his messages. With an unerring sense of direction, almost a compulsion, Filius found himself in the fantasy section. He pointed at a book and shook his head, "Lord of the Rings?"

Filius shook his head once more at Severus' vagaries and motioned for Arthur to remove the book. Arthur did so, and then placed something into his pocket.

"Moke purses," Arthur announced. "Two of them."

"Please, let it be the Headache potion," prayed Filius. "Let's return home."

Upon further exam, the larger moke purse contained multiple containers of the headache potion. The smaller purse only held a small sealed envelope that was addressed to the various Weasleys, Bill, Charlie, Fred, George, Ron, Ginny and Sirus Black, who was listed as Weasley by adoption. The sharp, angular handwriting was quite familiar.

Gingerly, Bill Weasley opened the envelope. There was a loud spark and he grimaced in pain while he flexed his hand. A small piece of paper fell to the floor and he picked it up. He read it, and then quickly swallowed.

"Personal note from Severus?" a non-sympathetic Filius questioned. "Do share, William."

"Men ought either to be indulged or utterly destroyed, for if you merely offend them they take vengeance, but if you injure them greatly they are unable to retaliate, so that the injury done to a man ought to be such that vengeance cannot be feared," quoted Bill. "In case you don't understand that, as the sentence was rather multisyllabic and you lot possess one brain cell that you share amongst yourselves, let me put it in very small words. Vengeance is a dish best served cold. We _**will**_ meet again and you _**will**_ dread our little get-together."

There was silence.

"_**Bugger**_." Bill Weasley growled.

Arthur Weasley shook his head. "I'm not saving you from him."

"Neither am I," Filius agreed. "Let me spend my energy on assisting someone that can be helped. I'll take this to Minerva's quarters. She had the beginning of a headache this morning."

The Charms Master then quickly Disapparated. One of Minerva's first decisions had been to lift the Hogwarts Anti-Disapparation Charms to her senior most lieutenants. Harry Potter was a little miffed that he was required to walk through Hogwarts but McGonagall had reminded him that he didn't have his license yet as Wilkie Twycross was among the missing.

"Gideon," Bill said. He seemed to have wanted to say, 'Dad' or perhaps, 'Father' but out came Gideon. "My sister, Ginny, has set her wedding day."

Arthur shook his head. "It matters not to me that your sister is getting married."

"She wants you and… your wife…" Again the pause as though his tongue had tried for "Mother" but switched it to another word. "Please?"

Again, Arthur shook his head.

Quickly, Bill gave him the time, date and location of the wedding.

"My wife will be quite close to term," was all Arthur said. "It's our first child, William, and I'm quite overly protective of her. When you have your own children, you'll understand. Children can be a man's greatest pleasure and also his supreme disappointment."

Bill Weasley flinched and nodded his head once.

"I pray that your wife is feeling well?" was his soft response.

"She has her moments," Arthur confessed. "I need to return to her, to assure her that I'm unharmed."

Again, Bill Weasley nodded his head and then quickly blurted out, "I'm sorry, you know. I really am. I should have kept them under control…but we thought he was involved in our parents' deaths."

"Don't apologize to me, apologize to him and his poor wife," Arthur snapped. "Good day."

With that, he turned away from his firstborn and walked toward his quarters. A despondent Bill Weasley watched his father walk away from him, his heart in his eyes.

* * *

Minerva McGonagall's room was completely dark and she wore an eye mask to shield her head from the minutest amount of light. The headache had returned like a Chinese Fireball Dragon intent on mass destruction.

"Just swallow this," whispered Filius. "Just a spoonful and then you'll sleep."

"Hurts," she whispered.

"I know it does, love." Filius crooned. "Sip."

"Severus?" was her soft question.

"Yes," he assured her. "He survived his wedding, but I fear the Weasleys children will be in a great deal of trouble if he catches them."

The threat of Severusy Retribution caused Minerva to laugh. Giggling increased her head pain but still, she could just imagine how frightened the Weasleys were. Severus enraged was a scary thought, and the fact that he had promised to take time to inflict the perfect act of retribution, well, if she was a Weasley, she'd be terrified. Filius took the opportunity to slip her the potion and she felt the pain lessen as it took affect.

"Our lad sweetened it," she approvingly stated.

"He always did have a soft spot for you. Should I be jealous?" Flitwick quipped.

Instead of protesting, Minerva tightened her grip on his hand. Softly, she implored, "Stay?"

"I wasn't planning on leaving you. I'll sit in the armchair next to your bed," assured her second in command.

"No, next to me. My bed's big enough for the two of us," a sleepy Minerva offered. "We can spoon."

"Spoon?" Filius repeated.

"Snuggling," she explained. "Come on, before I fall asleep."

Filius didn't need to be asked twice, so before too long, he was nestled next to his lady love. Since she was taller of them, she took the outside position and she nuzzled his neck with a few shy kisses.

"My, my, my, aren't we dreadfully bold," Filius gently encouraged her.

"Don't give up on me, Filius," she whispered. "When I feel better… when I'm not crippled by my migraines… I'll stop pushing you away. I just don't want you nursing me."

"I wish to help you, my love," Filius assured her. Minerva's soft breathing in his ear was his only response. "Fawkes?"

_Yes, Filius_, the sleepy bird mentally answered.

_If anything develops here, I'll kill you myself if you interrupt._

_Oh please, Filius, I __**am**__ a romantic. I am bonded to Albus, am I not? One would need to be a hopeless romantic if one was bonded to that badly dressed barmpot. You're in her bed, so yes, bed things should happen there!  
_

Alas, Filius Flitwick was a might knackered, so his normally razor sharp mind missed "am" as opposed to "was". Meanwhile, Fawkes turned a blind eye to whatever might occur in the bed and he carefully positioned his crippled wing just so. Perhaps, if someone got lucky, they might be considerate enough to massage his aching wing.

* * *

As the months progressed, the Resistance nobly bashed on, continuing to strike embarrassing blows against Voldemort thanks to Severus Snape's clandestine help. The Ministry of Magic staff was forced to deal with exploding toilets among other indignities. Irremovable, permanently stuck advertisements that had pictures of a smiling You Know Who proudly holding a container of U No Poo were plastered to every wall and every door. Unable to be removed, the walls were replaced only to re-covered with advertisements by the next morn.

Harry Potter and Ginny Weasley were bonded in holy matrimony and in attendance, in the cheap seats were a very pregnant Muriel Arundel and her loving husband Gideon. They had to miss the after wedding festivities as young Al, short for Albus and Alastor, Weasley arrived a wee bit early. Mother, son and proud father did quite well. Young Al was a happy, bubbly baby who did much to lighten his father's shattered psyche.

Filius and Minerva continued their tango of sexual eagerness. They weren't wet behind the ears teenagers, so they could savor the delightful ache of unfulfilled desire. Minerva laughed more and her green eyes sparkled and Filius? Well, the Charms Master had a spring in his step that had been sorely lacking since his wife died.

The wounded Fawkes recovered from his war wounds though Grubby-Plank sadly announced that the Phoenix would never fly again. His wing had been too badly damaged what with the infection having reached the bone. Fawkes, being a proud Phoenix, promptly ignored Grubby-Plank's dire prediction and practiced his flying in secret. What if his mage needed him? Would Albus be happy that a wounded wing had grounded his flying familiar? No, not at all, so he continued to stretch his wing, determined to take wing once more. He could manage a short, hopping type of flight, but it was better than being ground bound.

Meanwhile, Severus Snape determinedly read the various baby books cover to cover, determined to have everything memorized before the baby arrived. It mattered not to him that sometimes the books contraindicated each other, it was important that his brain was tightly crammed with baby related information.

* * *

Al was confused. This time, his bewilderment was so far beyond his normal state of utter incomprehension that it simply couldn't compare. Something rather strange was happening to him, and he pondered what it was. It was the bay bee he finally decided that was causing his belly to swell to epic proportions as those he regularly saw at HER place also had burgeoning bellies. But it was strange, that all the people with burgeoning bellies seemed to have girl parts. He knew the difference, as Nessie had girl parts, while he had boy parts which Nes was quite careful about cleaning.

Sometimes, there was a wiggling inside his tummy, and the first time it had happened, he had been frightened. It felt like there was a flyby in his belly, wanting to escape. His mind being so confused, he wondered if the bright flyby that had disappeared once more was hiding in his belly. It was a very odd place to hide though. The wiggling and jiggling had kept happening, and once he realized that there wasn't to be an eruption of flybys from his mouth, it became just another discomfort he blamed on the bay bee. The swollen belly, his sore breasts, the need to make water every hour, and the inability to be comfortable when he slept were all the many faults of the bay bee.

But the first time Nes had been rubbing his tummy, and the wiggle in his tummy had taken place, she had become deliriously excited. To his bewilderment, an overjoyed Nes had kissed him repeatedly and then she had bashfully kissed his belly, before she left to find Sev, skipping happily all the way. Then Sev had visited him, and he had put his hand on Al's belly as though waiting for the wiggle. The three of them had waited in silence for some time, and the bay bee had seemed afraid of Sev as there had been no wiggling. Sev had been sad that there was no wiggling as he had kept his hand on Al's belly for some time. When at last the bay bee gave a wiggle, Sev had smiled as if he was happy though he had seemed sad as he had wept.

But when Al had silently watched the Not Goods, he had noticed something. There were various people with boy parts that also possessed bellies, ranging from the slightest swell to rather grandiose specimens, but it appeared he was the only person with boy parts who had a bay bee.

Did that make him unusual? The few times had Sev let permitted him out in public, the Not Goods had made much of Al, caressing and stroking his belly. He didn't like when they pawed him, their knowing eyes cruelly amused. They were often mean to him, pinching and poking his breasts, and prodding his belly. The bay bee matched his fear, as it would inflict pain on Al with vicious punches and kicks in its intense desire to flee.

Sev had noticed his fear, and had protected him. One of the Not Goods had approached him, his hand posed to touch his belly, and when he had, the Not Good had received a painful shock. Then Sev had put his hand on Al's belly, and gently rubbed it while he tenderly kissed his cheek.

Sev was being quite Good to him, helping him stand as lately Al was rather awkward. He'd want to stand but his belly was quite content to stay where it was, making him flounder gracelessly. Sev also spoke to him constantly, in soft, gentle tone that Sev only used with him and Nes, and he often stroked Al's hair when they talked. Sev seemed to like stroking his hair, so Al let him as Al found it rather soothing. When others were around, Sev's voice changed into a sharp cutting pitch but never with him or Nes.

And now when Al was put to bed, Sev was the one to do it, as Nes couldn't handle him anymore. He always massaged Al's aching, swollen feet. Then, Sev would rub his back, intently concentrating on Al's aches from the back of his head and his ears all the way down to his bum.

Al liked being touched by Nes, but being rubbed by Sev was different. Sev's hands were larger, and sometimes he felt warm and melty and tingly when Sev was rubbing him. It was a really Good feeling, akin to when Al touched his boy parts. He rarely did that, only when he was sure that no one was around. Nes had caught him once when he was half dozing and dreaming about El and how Good it felt when they had rubbed against each other. The House Elf had blushed and squeaked, so he knew that it wasn't a proper thing to do, though it felt Good. He didn't understand why something so Good could be also Not Good, and therefore he hid his body's happy reaction to Sev's touch.

Al didn't want to anger Sev, especially now, when he and Sev and Nes were sharing the bed. Sev slept on the one side, and Nes was on the other side of him, and he felt safe and protected while he cuddled with a strangely shaped pillow that Sev had gotten for him.

With a contented sigh, Nes finished reading, "_Nigel's Mum is Having a Baby"_ to him, and closed the book. That meant it was time for Al to sleep, as Nes always read to him after he was tucked in for the night. When she was done reading, the lights would go out and it would be time to snuggle with Nessie. Later on, Sev would join them.

"Al go to sleep now," she signed.

"Yes," he agreed in their hand talk. "Nes sleep now."

Al then decided it was time to stop worrying about things he couldn't dare hope to understand, as he had been so focused on his own concerns that he hadn't listened to Nes' voice. It was his favorite part of the day when he was in bed and Nes read to him. She then rested her head on his bump, and then began industriously began rubbing gentle circles. Closing her eyes, Nes began to purr loudly. Hesitantly, he put his arm around her and he began tentatively rubbing her back. It felt Good when Nes rubbed his tummy, so he believed that she'd enjoy it also. He was rewarded with an increase in the volume of her purring, and a softly whispered, "Nessies loves her Al. Al's baby will be heres soon! Nessie will loves Master and Al's baby and protects it and keeps it safe."

Nessie quickly fell asleep, her arm still protectively wrapped around his belly. Al continued to rub her back, until he was also asleep. In time, Severus slipped into the bed next to Al, and he placed his hand on Al's tummy.

And so Al's days and nights continued until one day, the bay bee decided to arrive.

He felt odd in his tummy and pelvis, a pressure that had only increased in the last few days combined with occasional painful cramps. It was harder to walk, and a hovering Nes was constantly nearby. Even Sev remained close at hand, watching him. For some reason, Al thought of a man with a large walrus mustache and he pondered who it might be. His belly matched the mustached man in its impressive size. Perhaps he had a bay bee also?

It was time for dinner, and Sev was helping him waddle to the table when he felt a pain in his nethers. It wasn't a nice pain and he mewled his displeasure.

"What's happening?" Sev questioned Nessie.

Nessie stared intently at Al, sniffed the air and did a quick count. Her ears were trembling in pleasure and she excitedly bounced.

"Master's Baby arriving early!" Nessie proudly announced. "It be here soon!"

Seveurs Snape, proud resistance fighter, quadruple agent, former Hogwarts professor prided himself on never panicking. No, he would remain calm and rational while everything went to hell.

"It can't arrive!" Severus protested. "I don't have a name ready! We can't call it, 'IT'!"

Nessie looked sadly at her Master and gently patted his hand.

"The baby doesn't have an exit!" a flustered Severus helpfully pointed out.

Oh dear, Master had it bad, Nessie sadly thought. With a quick snap of her fingers, she had just the solution to Severus' hysteria. Stronachie 12 Year Old Single Highland Malt Whisky had never failed before.

"Master, drink this," she ordered. Normally, she wouldn't order her beloved Master about as though he was a silly House Elf, but he was acting the barmcake. A large tumbler should settle him right now. "Drink!" she ordered, and so Severus did. With a single, mighty gulp, Severus Snape drained the tumbler dry. She quickly filled the tumbler again and again ordered him to drink from it. He downed it easily without so much as a single cough.

"Better?" Nessie hopefully asked. "Al needing Master calm. Master upset, Al get upset. We be going to infirmary. Nessie has clothes."

Master had packed clothes for when the baby arrived, but Nessie had gone through the clothes and based on her experience in such matters, she had added a few nicer items. Master meant well, but he had no sense of style or comfort. Al would need soft, comfy clothes after the birth and Master would need something suitable for the well-wishers. Plus, Al would need socks, bright happy socks as his feet would be cold. She had also included a great many of Al's favorite chockies as he would need a treat after his ordeal.

Nessie also added necessities to the baby kit such as Tummy Honey cream, a soothing cream that would help Al's sore tummy after he had the baby. There was also a great many aromatherapy items that Nessie had gotten from Madam Malkin along with several nice baby outfits in happy colors such as melon, heliotrope, eggplant, emerald and Indian teal. Master had been silly and had only packed three baby outfits as though he thought the baby wouldn't make any messes.

Fortunately, Master had Nessie, who had been busy preparing for the arrival of HER baby. She shouldn't really blame Master as it was his first baby. The next one would be easier on him and he might not even need the whiskey to calm his nerves. Master and Al's baby would be the cutest baby, Nessie knew. Well, as long as he didn't inherit Master's nose, as he would need time to grow into it.

Perhaps, he'd need a few decades to grow into the nose as Master hadn't quite grown into his.

Perchance Master wouldn't notice if a loving Nessie fixed Baby's nose?

With a happy purr, Nessie took the hands of her little family and smoothly popped them into the Infirmary.

"Al having baby!" She loudly announced to the startled Medi-witch. "He early!"


	19. Chapter 19

AN - thanks to MM.

AN2 - mpreg. AU.

* * *

The Bay Bee was decidedly Not Good, Al decided. Pain was Not Good. Al's Pain was Truly Not Good. He had Good Nes clutched in his one arm and he was grabbing Good Not Good Sev's hand.

The pain came again and Nes loudly squeaked as he squeezed her a little too hard.

"Al, I think you just broke my hand," Not Good Sev tersely informed him.

Nes squeaked again and Al sniffled. Al didn't like pain. Al especially didn't like the feeling of something about to explode from his belly.

"When will he be having the Caesarean, Gatea?" Sev questioned.

Gaeta Mulgrew, mediwitch, shook her head.

"I actually didn't think he'd get this far," she admitted. "I figured he'd be dead by now."

"Are you telling me that you are _**not**_ fully prepared to bring my child into this world?"

Severus' not so veiled threat was duly noted by all concerned except for Al. He was busy squeezing and squeaking Nessie.

* * *

Al was sobbing. Nessie crooned to her friend, much to the annoyance of Gaeta Mulgrew.

"Can we do without the spontaneous sing song?" the witch snapped. "The tunelessness of it is driving me barmy!"

A frightened Nessie looked up at Master, wanting confirmation that her crooning was not helping Al.

"Al finds it soothing, so you will continue, Nessie." Severus announced. "You will continue unless I tell you otherwise."

"Oh Bloody hell, all we need is a pony for the singing House Elf to ride. This is a labour and delivery, not a circus," was Gaeta's loud protest.

_**Soothing**_ his bloody arse. Al was clutching Severus so hard that he was losing circulation in his arm. When a labour pain occurred, a sobbing Al would grab him harder. At this rate, Nessie would have permanent laryngeal damage and he'd be missing an arm due to gangrene. Yet, Nessie could croon as much as she wanted. Just in case, Al found in comforting.

_Shhh,_ Severus mentally whispered to Al.

_H-h-h-h-urts. W-W-why do you keep h-h-hurting m-m-me?_

_Headmaster? _That was most _**assuredly**_ Albus' mental voice, and Severus wondered what could be worse than this? What would Albus' reaction be to 'waking' up during the midst of his Caesarean? _I'm not hurting you._

_H-h-h-h-urts. P-p-p-ain. P-p-please…. Stop. I'll be…good. I-I-I'll do… whatever you want… Please… stop. _

_Shhh… Al… this will pass. Just close your eyes._

Hesitantly, Severus began to mentally whisper a soft song. He couldn't sing worth a note, it wasn't a true lullaby, but… would Al really know? He concentrated on being soothing, to bring some comfort to Al's damaged soul.

_Lavenders green, dilly dilly, lavenders blue. When you love me, dilly dilly, I will love you._

_A penny for your thoughts, my dear. A penny for your thoughts, my dear…_

* * *

All the books Severus read came together in a mass of confusing, jumbled words. Was he really expected to rub Al's feet during labor? Ice his back? He wasn't sure what would help Al, so he thought it best to massage Al's back. Al was leaning on him for physical support and softly whimpering. He was rather heavy, therefore Severus cautiously got into the bed with Al. Al was positioned just so with Severus propping him into a sitting position.

A medwitch… Sonya… his mind provided, a former student of his, had slipped Al something to drink. Whatever it was, it seems to ease Al's pain enough so that he could sleep… sporadically… Even now, an exhausted Al was asleep; he was softly snoring and drooling on Severus' shirt. Nessie was still gently holding Al's hands.

"Your... baby… is a little early. That's why we're not doing the Caesarean, as we're hoping that what I just gave…him… will delay… his… labor." Sonya explained while she heroically struggled with the difficult concept of a male mother-to-be. "I'm sorry; I'm not used to having male patients in labor."

"This madness works, you'll soon see a ward full of them," Mulgrew darkly predicted. "Our stoic studs will be whinging like babies."

"The baby is four weeks early," Severus said. "What will happen?"

"I've thoroughly checked him… he's viable right now." Sonya explained. She gave him a comforting smile and Severus wasn't having any of that shite.

"_**Viable**_?" Severus repeated. "I want my son _**healthy**_, not just functioning."

Neville Longbottom was barely functioning. He didn't want _**NEVILLE**_ as a son.

"He's just a little bit on the small side," quickly inserted Sonya. "It's to be expected. His lungs are good, but I'd prefer if he was a little fatter. Chubby babies are happy babies."

Severus decided that he'd take her word for it.

_I know nothing about babies! Especially undercooked babies!_

_Bloody hell, I don't even have a name for it. It. _

_Yes, 'IT' Snape. And now Prefect for the Slytherin House, IT Snape._

_I have to figure out a name. Tobias is OUT of the question. Meallán? For Eileen? No… no… no… Meallán Snape. Melon Snape. No. No. No. _

_What were Albus' parents' names? His father was Percival? Good God no, I can't stand the name. Mercy Nursy Percy - Pervy Percy. Fortunately, I have a lifetime's experience in having a horrible name subject to ridicule. I won't subject IT to that. _

_Albus' mother was Kendra?_

_Kendricks? Kendale? Kendrix? Kendon? Kendrick? Kendra is a masculine Hindu name. Kendo? Kendrew?_

_I don't know why I'm bothering. IT will hate me. IT will blame me for him having my beak of a nose. IT will spit up on me and squawk whenever I am nearby. IT will also express its dislike of me by copiously leaking from both ends whenever I attempt to hold him._

_IT will love Nessie. I'll be too strict with IT as I don't know any better. I truly don't know better. Nessie will slip IT sweets when I'm not looking._

_IT will hate me. IT will be ashamed of his greasy, black bat of a father. Let's not even get into IT's reaction to his other father being a pastel clad cabbage._

_What's that story Nessie always reads to Al and IT? What is that brat's name? The one that has a bit of a sulk because he's being replaced by a cuter, younger model? _

_Nigel?_

_Kendrick Nigel Dumbledore Snape._

_It's a good, proper name. I like it far better than IT. IT probably won't like it, but I'll explain to him that it was either Kendrick or IT. I will remind him that it's never too late to change it back to IT. That will straighten him up and stop the whinging. _

_But on second thought, I better run his name past the mother. Last thing I can handle is an unhappy baby and a stroppy mommy._

"Nessie? Do you like the name Kendrick Nigel Snape?" Severus asked his House Elf.

Nessie nodded her head in excitement. "Nessie loves name! Master chooses the bestest name!"

Very well, Kendrick it was. Far be it for Papa to disagree with the Mother.

* * *

When Al roused, Severus gave him ice chips and fed him soup. An exhausted Al was breathing easier and seemed to be deeply sleeping for longer and longer periods. Nessie was also no longer being squeaked as frequently, which he hoped was a good sign. His contractions had slowed. Perhaps, they would stop.

Then Kendrick could continue to cook, so when he made his arrival, he wouldn't be four weeks undercooked. Yes, Kendrick would be the proper size for a roast, complete with healthy lungs.

"Professor Snape?" Sonya's somber tone disrupted that happy notion. "We need to take your… spouse… into surgery."

"What's wrong?" Severus demanded. "Is it Al? Is it Kendrick?"

"Kendrick is showing some signs of foetal distress. Since he's estimated to be thirty six weeks based on the date of conception, his lungs should be developed enough that he can breathe air."

"_**Should**_?" Severus growled.

"Well, yes, up until now, his lungs have been full of…"

"Amniotic fluid, I've read the pamphlet," growled Severus. "Several times."

"Very well, Kendrick's heart rate is erratic, so we wish to take him now. If we need to make a decision between your son and his… f-f-father," Sonya again tripped over the word despite her noble attempts at pretending that this was a normal situation and was in fact, the fifth time it was occurring today.

"You will not _**choose**_," spat Severus. "That is not an acceptable option. _**BOTH**_ is the only acceptable answer."

"Will you be joining us in the operating theatre?" was her next question.

When Cissy Malfoy had Draco through a Caesarean, Severus remembered Lucius had stayed in the Father's Room at St. Mungo's, holding court and smoking cigars. At the time, he had thought it odd but not completely surprising that Lucius hadn't been with Cissy. It was bound to be messy and a prissy Cissy would hate to be seen with a hair out of place.

Now far removed from that august event, Severus realized that Lucius had the right idea.

Father's Room, here he came! Perhaps he might even have a drink or three to steady his nerves.

"Whatever for? Do you expect me to _**catch**_ the baby?" Severus asked.

Nessie's mismatched ears were twitching uncontrollably and then they went flat against her head.

Oh no, what had Severus the clueless done _**now**_?

"Don't you have something to do?" Severus growled at Sonya as he needed to have a private chat with his House Elf. "Perhaps you need to wash your hands?"

Sonya ran from the room, and while normally Severus would be delighted and proud of the fact that he could still intimidate former students, he saw Nessie's face. Definitely crestfallen.

Had Pinocchio ever felt such unhappiness when faced with his Cricket? NO, he had blithely ignored his Cricket and grown donkey ears!

Therefore Severus would listen to his Cricket. Then do whatever he thought best.

"What ever is the matter, Nessie?" Severus questioned.

"Master no go with Al? Al be _**scared**_." Nessie then lovingly patted the sleeping Al's hand. "Al frightened. No know peoples in room. What if they not nice to Al?"

Severus Snape was a strong man, he had faced Dark Lords and lied to their faces, dealt with Minerva when she was feeling stroppy and he wouldn't be intimidated by a House Elf with big, brown eyes and mismatched ears.

He was _**SEVERUS TOBIAS SNAPE.**_

The Greasy Black Bat of the Hogwarts' Dungeon. Students PEED on themselves when he roared.

It wouldn't happen! A House Elf would not bully him!

"Master always telling Nessie not to leaves Al alone. Master important person. Bad peoples might hurts Al or Baby to gets at Master. Nessie doesn't understands why Master not stayings with Al. Nessie can't be staying becauses Nessie is a House Elf. Al being so scared, Al needing Master!"

Oh bloody, ruddy hell, he was going in.

But first, before the baby was arrived, what did he need? Nessie had made a rather thorough list, and had gotten everything and then some. Nappies, yes, lots of them, assorted powders, creams, changing bags…everything that IT…. KENDRICK might physically need …

Emotionally?

Bloody hell, he didn't have any Godparents! What if Severus unexpectedly came down with a terminal case of DEAD? He had asked Arthur Weasley to raise the child, but there was nothing official.

What if the Dark Lord decided to adopt him? He wasn't very paternal, but it was Albus' child. The chance to thoroughly corrupt Albus' spawn would be quite tempting to him.

Yes, Kendrick would be the first wizard creating Horcruxes while wearing nappies.

He whispered a quick spell, and he hoped that his spur of the moment choices wouldn't turn him down.

"Very well, I'll stay with Al," he told Nessie.

"Nessie knowing handsome and kind Master would do the right thing." The House Elf beamed at him.

The right thing, Severus felt like informing his adoring House Elf, would have been for Severus Snape to never have been born.

* * *

"What does the letter from Severus say?" Minerva questioned. Filius shook his head and motioned for Arthur Weasley to enter Minerva's quarters. He was followed by Molly Weasley who was cradling young Al Weasley who, to the surprise of no one, had a shock of bright ginger hair.

Filius motioned for Minerva to sit down. He was very courteous and protective of _**his**_ Min, and Al and Molly hid their smiles.

"Has Fawkes settled down?" Filius questioned.

"No, he's still making that warbling noise," Minerva stated as she made herself comfortable on the chaise lounge. "Wilhelmina says just he's being broody."

Fawkes made a clamorous clatter that sounded like _"I am NOT being __**Broody**__"_ in rather rude Phoenixese and Filius nodded his head once.

"Did you remind Wilhelmina that Fawkes is _**male**_?" Filius questioned. "Sire of many a fine chick, or so Albus informed me."

"Read the bloody letter," snapped the impatient Minerva. "If Fawkes is being hormonal, I'll not get involved. Though you'd be delighted to know that he used your necktie to build his nest."

"I wondered where I had left it," was all Filius would admit. Leaving Molly disappointed in not knowing exactly WHERE he had left it in Minerva's quarters and if any other parts of his clothing would show up in Fawkes' nest.

Filius put on his glasses and then opened the letter. He read it through twice and then a third and fourth time.

"Oh my," he breathed.

"What? What!" Minerva demanded.

"'I am pleased to announce the imminent arrival of Salazar Snape. While several weeks early, it is hoped that both he and his,,,' I can't read his scribble, I'm assuming that it's supposed to be mother, 'will survive. I would be honored if Arthur, Molly, Minerva and Filius would possibly condescend to be young Salazar's godparents. Fight it out among yourself who wants the dubious honor of being Godparents to Severus the traitor's son. While I have been forced into unwedded bliss with Salazar's…' Again, I can't read the word but I assume that he wrote mother,' I doubt the legality of it all but on such small hopes Salazar's fate depends'."

"Sincerely, Severus'."

"Salazar? He's naming his baby _**SALAZAR**_?" Minerva squawked. There was an answering comment from Fawkes and a rude remark form Molly that was unrepeatable in mixed company.

Filius' moustache twitched. He loved teasing Minerva as she was so bloody serious sometimes.

"'Post Script. Get Minerva off the floor, Filius. His name is actually to be Kendrick Nigel Snape, though Salazar would have been rather droll'."

* * *

He stayed with Al while the various mediwitches and assorted midwives prepped him, doing arcane things under the blue sheet that graced Al's nethers. Being the proud father to be, Severus believed it improper to watch the rituals taking place underneath the blue veil of secrecy. It wasn't that Severus got sick up from the sight of blood, no, far from it. He would admit only to himself that the very idea of seeing Albus Dumbledore gutted like a fish being deboned was a bit much even for his iron cast stomach.

"We'll try not to snip anything vital," cackled Gaeta, medi-midwife from Hell.

Where the HELL had they found Gaeta, Severus wondered. Could they possibly retire her and send her back to the depths of hell that she had been spawned?

"Yes, like any of the internal iliac arteries or the inferior vena cava if you're being particular inept," was Severus' immediate response. "No doubt you were being your usual crude self and making a comment on Al's pride and joy. Anything happens to Al, anything occurs to Kendrick, you can rest assured that I will inform the Dark Lord of your incompetence."

A sleepy Al briefly roused from his narcotic enhanced sleep. His blue eyes appeared confused and then he saw Sev. He smiled, an idiot's mile wide grin, overjoyed that he recognized someone in the midst of this medical travesty.

He wiggled his fingers at Severus and it took Severus a few minutes to recognize what he said in their hand talk. "Al scared. Al happy Sev is."

What the ruddy hell was that supposed to mean? His experience with children was limited to adolescents, most of which, if one excluded the Crabbes and Goyles, were able to speak full sentences.

_Ok, break it down into small words. Al is scared, yet Al is happy that you are. I'm not happy, do I look happy?_

_Have I ever looked happy in my entire misbegotten life? I think not. But Al is happy because I am… I am __**what**__? _

_Looking particularly svelte in my all black attire? _

_No… no…. no… _

_I'm… __**here**__… pretty much._

_Bloody hell, Al can't be happy because I'm HERE with him?_

_He's frightened but he recognizes that I won't let them hurt him. What do I say to him? Damn it, I need to be Albus right now! He'd say something that either would soothe me or anger me enough that I'd no longer be frightened. _

Carefully, Severus signed, 'Go to sleep, Al'.

Nessie had done something with Al's hair, twisted it in an intricate amount of braids. Really, it was far too elaborate, but at least his hair was under control. With a gentle touch, Severus began stroking Al's face, using a small towel to blot the perspiration from Al's face.

_When you wake up, you'll be my little medical marvel. _

* * *

It was a rather anticlimactic end considering the past nine months. A quick flick beneath the no-layman's land's blue sheet and then there was a slight mewling noise.

It wasn't Al, as he was deeply asleep. Could it be?

"Heart rate is above one hundred…"

That was good, Severus remembered. Kendrick's pulse was supposed to be over one hundred.

"His cry is a little weak but I predict he'll be screaming his head off when we next check his scores," Gaeta murmured. "Like fathers, like son. Muscle tone is good, color is nice and pink and… let's cut the cord and wrap him. Hand him off to the proud Papa. Well, to one of the Papas. The one that's barely standing upright."

His knees were fiercely trembling; it was akin to the first time he had gotten on a broom. Sonya had a purple clad bundle in her arms and she was walking… _**towards**_… him.

_I can't do this. I can't do this. I can't be responsible for Kendrick, Al and Nessie. I can't… I can't keep being a double agent for the Order… I have to protect them. _

Nessie snapped her fingers quickly and a chair appeared. It was a nice rocking chair and she placed it behind Severus. Not quite gently, the House Elf pushed him into sitting in the chair.

Operating theatre; yes, she was there, making sure that he didn't fall on his arse. Probably the House Elf had thought it proper that _**Master **_be there during his son's birth and she had done a little white House Elf lie… for Master's own good.

She was happily crooning and she had a bottle in her hand, just in case Kendrick decided he was hungry.

Sonya placed the bundle in his arm and Severus instinctively handled Kendrick, supporting the baby's neck and head in the crook of his arm. The baby looked around and Severus had another flash of panic. Then Kendrick looked up at him and all was right in Severus' world.

"He has _**Albus'**_ nose," Severus marveled.


	20. Chapter 20

We left Severus holding his son.

* * *

Little Kendrick Nigel Dumbledore Snape did exactly what little babies were supposed to do.

He made messes.

He went through clothing changes faster than Bellatrix LeStrange did.

He spit up.

He cried at the top of his lungs for the longest time.

And Kendrick quickly wormed his way in Severus Snape's rock hard granite slab of a heart. It took one sleepy smile and he had wrapped his little fingers around Papa's heart.

It mattered not at all to Severus that most would dismissively inform him that Kendrick's smile was due to gas.

Nessie had insisted that Kendrick was smiling because he was joyful seeing his father and Nessie was the resident expert on babies. And if Nessie repeatedly insisted that Kendrick was the cutest baby she had ever seen; well, he would certainly let her judgment stand uncontested.

Severus was rather leery of holding Kendrick, due to the fact that there a nonrefundable, non returnable policy on the baby. If he broke him, he simply wouldn't be able to return him for a suitable replacement. Nessie, having dealt with many a baby before, though none she loved as deeply as Baby Kendrick, decided that the best way to handle silly, scared Master was to make him hold Baby as much as possible.

Al, on the other hand, was not so enamored of the newest member of the dysfunctional Snape family. He was learning the bitter truth, that once the baby arrived, Mum was no longer the center of the universe. In fact, on more than one occasion, Nessie had to prevent him from pinching the sleeping baby. Nessie, being a wise House Elf, knew that her jealous Al needed extra special attention so she spent a great deal of time with him. When that didn't work, and he was still acting stroppy, she slipped him a few chockies. Master also needed more consideration, as his clothes needed to reflect his new stature as proud father, and well, Kendrick just demanded _**everything**_.

It wasn't unusual for Severus to pick the physically collapsed Nessie off the floor next to Kendrick's cot and gently place her in bed next to Al.

Today, Severus was delighted to admit but only to himself, today, had been a perfect day. Papa had managed to pick up Kendrick from his cot and walk over to the rocking chair where he gave Kendrick his bottle. There had been no lost of limb or permanent disfigurement suffered by either the Proud Papa or Cute Baby. In fact, Severus had decided that he was possibly getting rather proficient at feeding Kendrick, and was debating moving onto the challenging course of Changing Young Kendrick's Nappies, when Doom, Disaster and Despair, the Three Harpies from Hell, decided to pay a visit.

Yes, Lucius, Narcissa and Draco had come to the Chateau Snape, bearing gold, frankincense and myrrh.

* * *

Nessie was instructed to put Al to sleep… err… to bed… and then to do something constructive in the House Elf vein in the kitchen. Tea, bikkies, rat poison, whatever she thought was appropriate to serve the Harpies from Hell.

"You're a natural," Cissy assured Severus. "I knew you would, you took such wonderful care of your Slytherins."

Lucius just rolled his eyes. Severus mimicked Lucius' look of disbelief. He had a reputation to maintain, but inwardly, he was delighted to hear that accolade from someone besides Nessie. Not that he didn't trust the House Elf, but there was the remote possibility that she was biased.

"Oh, and he looks like you!" Cissy cooed. She held out her arms in a silent demand, and Severus regretfully gave her Kendrick.

"Fortunately, as he's too young to carry off a two foot beard," Severus drawled.

_Kendrick, you pick up the faintest hint of egomania or wizard supremacy from Auntie Cissy, I will ground you forever and ever. _

"Severus, the Dark Lord made a comment to me the other day," Lucius purred. "He's rather disappointed that you haven't named him Godfather to young Kendrick."

_**Klunk. **_

That was the sound of Severus' granite heart hitting the floor.

"I must confess that I never thought of that." Severus smoothly admitted. Thanks to all his years of being a triple… quadruple agent… he instinctively began to respond to the current crisis, attempting to bend it toward his advantage. "I thought that the Dark Lord would be horrified by something so pedestrian. With the recent population explosion among our members, are we even doing the roles of Godparents anymore?"

He sat in the rocker and Kendrick began to softly fuss. Holding out his arms, Severus motioned for Cissy to give him back _**his**_ baby. Severus desperately wanted his _**no-way-in-hell-would-he-be-the-Dark-Lord's-Godson **_baby back in his arms so he could protect _**his**_ son. Kendrick snuggled and _**smiled**_ at _**him**_ when Kendrick realized that he was in his Father's arms.

Because Kendrick knew that his Father _**loved**_ him and would _**protect**_ him from harm.

_Like bloody hell am I letting the Dark Lord be your godfather. _

Severus began rocking, easing Kendrick back to sleep. Outwardly, he was calm. Inwardly, it was another story.

* * *

Filius Flitwick and Arthur Weasley were dispatched post haste to Abergavenny after a fiery Phoenix did a raunchy song and dance number over the ruins of Fort Gobannium. Master Filius, who had been occupied snogging Miss Minerva, was not his usual cheerful self. He found the missive from Severus and return with all due speed back to his cuddly and snuggly witch.

Minerva, while inwardly approving of Filius' obvious disappointment in being interrupted, outwardly shook her head. Discipline must be maintained and that meant Minerva McGonagall could not show her disappointment over her cuddle time being interrupted. She opened the letter and read it. A horrified Minerva read it twice, and then handed the missive to Filius as though it was a live serpent.

"It seems You Know Who wants to be Godfather to the bairn. Severus seems in a bit of panic about the possibility of subjecting Kendrick to a bond with You Know Who," she announced to Arthur, Molly and Remus. Fawkes made a loud screech of angry protest at that revelation, and Minerva 'magicked' the Phoenix back into a restorative slumber. For some reason, the Phoenix had been very vocal and physically active in the last few weeks and Wilhelmina had warned Minerva that Fawkes was unduly stressing his damaged wing.

"Poor Kendrick," Molly whispered. "What can we do?"

"I need to research this," Filius announced. "I need to return to my quarters."

* * *

No response from Filius. And now the Dark Lord was dropping more noticeable hints. Severus was pretending to be hopelessly obsessed with wee Kendrick, but really, supposed obtuseness was a _rather_ rash defense against the Dark Lord. Being stupid usually resulted in a quick yet painful case of dead. Finally, Severus sent off a rather terse message to the Charm Master. It was not so much politely worded time for a meeting that very day. That done, Severus put Al to bed, 'magiked' him into a deep sleep as well, Al was still looking rather peaked after his latest ordeal. Papa then packed up Nessie and Kendrick and brought them to Glastonbury Tor for a family holiday. Well, truthfully, it was an excuse to show off Young Kendrick to Minerva and Filius as he highly doubted the Weasleys would be particularly impressed with a child not of their fertile loins.

Nessie was instructed to be busy playing with the baby, as Severus figured Minerva would anticipate him giving the child over to the House Elf to manage. Minerva arrived first and the Scottish Valkyrie shook her head. Filius, Poppy, Arthur and Molly…. No… Gideon and Muriel then appeared.

"_**Recklessness**_!" Minerva hissed at Severus.

In response, Nessie bared her teeth and hissed back at Minerva. No one would _**ever**_ be allowed to talk to her Kind and Handsome Master like that! The various Rebels looked at the overly protective House Elf who was cuddling _**HER**_ baby and then they glanced at Severus.

"Severus?" warned Filius. _Is your little friend SAFE?_ Filius was really asking.

"Nessie, please don't hiss at Minerva. Some people show they care by soft words, Minerva usually curses," Severus dryly quipped. "It's one of the most charming aspects of her personality."

Nessie looked doubtful at Master, as though thinking he was quite the barm pot, but then she nodded. It didn't mean that she didn't stop watching Minerva. Yes, Master trusted her, but Nessie didn't.

"May I see the baby?" Filius asked. "Come now, you must be wishing to show him off."

He held out his arms and looked toward Nessie, who was not giving up HER baby without a direct command from Master.

"Not really, I don't find him exceedingly remarkable," dryly commented Severus.

"Not fooling me," Filius gently chastised the proud Papa. "_**Not**_ fooling me at all."

Severus growled his annoyance at his failed deception and he motioned for Nessie to give Filius the baby. The Charms Master oohed and awwed appropriately and then he had to demonstrate why he was the most brilliant mage currently alive in all of Europe. Not even Albus had managed to easily keep up with Filius when his brilliant mind was running on all its cogs.

"His blue eyes and nose… they're from his mother?" Filius remarked. "They look _**familiar**_."

Severus began cursing himself. Filius had known Albus _**before**_ Aberforth had decided to permanently rearrange his sibling's nose in a fit of brotherly hate. Once, a long time ago, Albus had a proper nose, which he had bequeathed to Kendrick.

"Mistress has pretty blue eyes," Nessie quickly inserted. She then looked ill-at-ease as she realized that House Elves were NOT supposed to be involved in conversations with Wizards and Witches.

"I know you're taking good care of your Mistress," Filius gently assured her. "How is she doing with the new arrival?"

"A might jealous," was Severus' terse explanation. Nessie had done her best to prevent Master from knowing the situation, but Severus knew that Al was being a wee bit stroppy regarding the new addition.

"That's understandable," Arthur Weasley admitted. "Now, don't hog the baby, Filius. Let me see him."

_**Wait**__. Arthur Weasley holding the baby? What if Kendrick decides that he likes Arthur Weasley better than his own father? Well, if anything happens to me, I'd want Arthur to take care of him, so … well… it's quite permissible if Kendrick likes him. But Kendrick __**can't**__ like Arthur better than me._

The two Weasleys made approvingly comments on the sprog. It seemed that even though the Weasleys had a gaggle of children, they still appreciated perfection. Meanwhile, Severus carefully watched Arthur to see how he held Kendrick just in case he was doing it better than Severus was. Arthur had an almost lackadaisical grip on the baby, and Severus sternly warned himself not to rip Kendrick back from Arthur.

_I highly doubt that Arthur's ever dropped one of his children though it could explain his youngest son's obtuseness. He's just a great deal more comfortable holding babies than I am. That's to be expected as he always had a spare or three in case the baby didn't bounce._

"Filius…" Severus began.

"We're all bonding Kendrick," Filius explained. "Just take a seat on the rock while I get everything prepared."

* * *

Filius took out a small box from his pocket, whispered a few words and then put the rapidly enlarging container on the ground.

"Minerva?" the Charms Master requested. "Please take Fawkes out of the box."

Severus was startled. _**Fawkes**_? _**FAWK**_! Err. FAWKES!!

"Fawkes?" Severus repeated. The Phoenix stuck his scarlet head out of the box and began examining his surroundings.

"Yes, I needed a Phoenix Feather, freshly plucked," Filius tersely explained. "Plus, I need seven guardians for Kendrick."

"Seven?" Severus repeated. Bloody hell, he needed to be more proactive and stop repeating Filius.

"You as the father, Arthur, Molly, Minerva, Nessie and I only make six," Filius explained. "I asked Fawkes and he agreed to be the seventh guardian. With the seven of us guarding Kendrick, there's no way He Who Wants to be Godfather can bond his soul."

Now Nessie was confused, and she was looking at her Master for answers.

"Nessie no be guardian. Nessie _**only**_ House Elf. Nessie _**not**_ good enough," she implored Severus. "Master should find someone else. Master's Baby deserving better!"

Her ears were clenched in her hands and she was twisting her ears.

"Now, Nessie, you don't _**need**_ to be human to be Kendrick's guardian. You obviously love Kendrick and are quite willing to protect him," Filius gently explained to the troubled House Elf. "Now, Nessie, _**please**_ don't hurt your pretty ears."

"Master approves?" Nessie doubtfully whispered. She had ceased compulsively twisting her ears but her hands were still firmly latched on her ears.

"Yes, I _**do**_," Severus informed his House Elf. "However, I also know that Kendrick will be _**most**_ displeased if you permanently disfigure your ears at his dedication."

She fearfully gasped and immediately put her blood stained hands in her little pockets in a futile attempt at hiding them. Desperately, the House Elf prayed that her Master wouldn't notice the blood trickling down her face.

"Clean your hands," Master roughly ordered. "And come over here so I can look at your ears."

Hesitantly, she approached her Master and she let him heal her ears. The little House Elf had her hands covering her face in a futile attempt not to be seen.

* * *

Oh! She had gotten so distressed that she had twisted her ears.

In front of Master's _**FRIENDS**_. His _**GOOD**_ Friends, not his _**BAD**_ friends. His bad friends would have laughed but his _**GOOD**_ friends looked horrified!

Then Kind, Handsome, Wonderful Master had to _**HEAL**_ her instead of focusing on Baby. Therefore, Nessie decided it would be best if she make herself as inconspicuous as possible so Kind Master wouldn't be required to punish her during the ceremony. While normally hiding from Master was Very Bad House Elf behavior, Master's friends were holding Master's baby and she wasn't needed.

To her deep shame, the pretty Phoenix decided to compound her abject mortification by sunning himself on a rock next to her. She had moved to another spot and he had followed her, holding his maimed wing aloft so it wouldn't dragged in the dirt. Fawkes had been chastised for overdoing it, and Nessie knew it was her fault. The Phoenix had wanted to remind her of her proper station in life so she sat and inwardly wept. Tightly, she clenched her hands so not to reach for her ears.

She wouldn't shame her Beloved and Kind Master by self-administering much needed punishment in public!

Not Again!

The Phoenix was so _**bright**_ and _**beautiful**_, a _**proper**_ companion for a wizard of Master's stature. She struggled even harder to sink into the ground, but the Phoenix decided to watch her. His black eyes, full of intelligence, his bright scarlet and gold feathers! Oh how _**handsome**_ a creature! How _**magnificent**_!

Nessie tried not to sniff, but she realized finally how mighty Al… _**ALBUS**_… had once been. To have such a creature as his familiar.

Master must be even more special than stupid Nessie had guessed because he was bonded to Al… _**Albus**_. Marriages between wizards and witches were always careful matches. Political clout and magical powers were always important factors in marriages, at least according to the fashion magazines that Nessie had devoured and memorized. And to think that daft Nessie had told Master that she loved him! She _**did**_, but truly, her Very Important, Exceedingly Powerful Master must have been sickened by her heartfelt devotion. She was a House Elf, scarred, stupid and slow, with ripped ears and… he was her Wonderful, Very Important Master.

Oh, and Baby Kendrick would be just as Wonderful and Smart and Important as Master was. Probably would have his choice of House Elves… House Elves who hadn't been hurt by their Mistresses as they were thick dawdlers. House Elves who took their punishments properly rather than begging for forgiveness.

Her chin quivered and she hid her face behind her hands. She curled into a little ball of heartbroken misery. She didn't want to cry, not in front of Master's friends… but how her broken heart hurt.

_**Don't cry, Nessya **__**Uriyella**__** . **_

The voice she heard in her head was _**warm**_ and _**musical**_ and _**perfect**_… and Nessya Uriyella, the House Elf better known by the trivializing diminutive Nessie, sniffed. She clenched her hands together tightly, digging her nails into her skin.

_**Thank you for taking care of my Albus for me, little one. He's very fortunate to have you.**_

The Phoenix rubbed her face with his and then covered her with his wing before he softly sang to her. His singing stirred happy memories of her mother and her barely remembered father, how they had loved her and protected her from Mistress and her spawn. Fawkes continued to sing until a sobbing, exhausted Nessie was deeply asleep.

* * *

It was unnerving, Severus decided. To see Fawkes and Nessie next to each other. The Phoenix was sheltering Nessie with his good wing and softly cooing to her.

There was _**no**_ doubt in Severus' mind that Fawkes was aware of the current situation.

Meanwhile, if that wasn't enough, even the emotionally clueless Severus had noticed that Nessie was quite despondent over her Master's chastisement. He had a headache brewing, and desperately, Severus pinched the bridge of his nose in order to ward it off. He required patience with Nessie as she had been dreadfully abused by her previous Mistress, so he decided it best to let her settle down. As for Fawkes, if Albus' familiar wasn't busy announcing to their little gathering who the lucky Mum really was, while happily severing Severus' entrails from his gut, well, perhaps he was approving of how Severus was juggling the situation.

"Two blocks of chocolate and a sip of butterbeer plus a brief nap is all she needs," Filius gently informed the younger mage. "That will help steady her nerves. She's very young, Severus, and she's quite enthralled with you and the baby. No doubt she's working herself to exhaustion every day. Her self-injury was simply because she was overwhelmed at the idea of being young Kendrick's guardian."

"I wish she'd stop self-mutilating herself," Severus tiredly protested. "I don't remember any of the Hogwarts House Elves acting like that."

"She's come from a bad situation and has found herself with a new, kind master. Nessie was conditioned to anticipate punishment for the smallest of transgressions. She's inflicting it on herself as she truly believes she deserves it. It's a common occurrence. A great many of the Hogwarts House Elves have similar backgrounds. Copious amounts of chocolate, judicious amounts of butterbeer and a little Fawkes should help her," Filius explained.

At Severus' concerned look, Filius continued to explain. "Fawkes sings a song of comfort to them. It soothes the House Elf's psyche and they nap for a bit. When they wake up, their emotional equilibrium is much better. I asked Fawkes to visit with Nessie today and see what he could do for her as she seemed quite shy when you introduced us to her. That's usually a bad sign with House Elves as most will talk off your ears and other body parts. I also conjectured that it would help Fawkes as he's been rather out of sorts lately, what with Albus's death, let alone, his bum wing. As it was, I had a devil of a time convincing him. Minerva and I had both had to speak to him at length about how much she cares for you, Kendrick and your… spouse."

Severus' headache returned in full force when he realized that Fawkes was refraining from protesting only because of Nessie's deep devotion to Al. Truly, Severus was making a bad habit of being saved by Nessie. At this rate, she deserved a raise.

"Now, now, now, everything will be fine. This is an incredible bit of magic we're about to do. Human, Goblin, House Elf and Elemental combined together to create an unbreakable bond," Filius explained to the concerned father. "There will be no way he can weasel his way into the Bond."

* * *

When Nessie woke after her brief kip, she was very quiet and subdued, insisting on hiding behind her Master. Her Master was industriously cradling the baby in his right arm and trying not to wince while Fawkes the Phoenix was sinking his claws into his left shoulder. Fawkes had informed Filius that he wished to perch on Severus' shoulder to oversee the Bonding Ceremony.

Naturally, the flying featherduster hadn't informed Severus of this, as it seemed the Phoenix was once again not talking to Severus.

The Phoenix's weight settled onto Severus's shoulder and then he stretched his flexible neck in order to peer at Kendrick. The baby cooed at the bright bird while Severus hissed his disgust. Fawkes had _**thwacked**_ him with his bad wing. No doubt it was deliberate as Fawkes had hit him pretty bloody hard.

_**It's not my fault! About the wing! About Albus! About Kendrick! **_

Then something happened and only Severus noticed as he was busy waiting for the Birdy Blast of Phoenixy Denouncement to occur. The Phoenix tilted his head as though confused and Fawkes gazed at the baby. Kendrick stared back, and the familiar and the baby's eyes locked. They continue to stare at each other and Fawkes tilted his head still further. In response, Kendrick squirmed and moved his arms as though he was attempting to fly.

Kendrick then made a noise that sounded like an old man's laugh. In particular, one specific old man.

_Dumbledore. _

Kendrick wiggled once more and Fawkes drew still closer to the baby. In his wiggles, the baby managed to swat the Phoenix' beak.

The Phoenix pulled his head away from the baby and shook his head. Kendrick made a happy noise and waved his hands energetically.

_**Just like his father. Whenever I mindspoke too much to him, he'd grab my beak to silence me. **_

That was Fawkes. Bloody Fawkes was in his head, mindspeaking to him. But wait… had Fawkes been mindspeaking to Kendrick? Was that even possible at such a young age?

_**Fawkes… **_Severus hesitantly began.

_**And, yes, by that comment I mean, Albus, **__**not**__** you. **_

_**You're acknowledging me?**_

Again, a not very gentle thwack to his head from the Phoenix's bad wing.

_**FAWKES! Bloody hell that hurts. But… But…You **__**know**__** who his **__**fathers**__** are.**_

_**Yes.**_

_**Why aren't you telling everyone? Minerva would castrate me on the spot. **_

_**Too soon.**_

_**Too soon? **_Repeated Severus.

_**Too soon. **_ The Phoenix sagely repeated.

Too soon? That response from Albus's familiar implied a plan of action. Had the Greatest Mage since Merlin had first taken a bloody leak, _**deliberately**_ allowed himself to be captured? Had that been part of Albus' plan? To be turned into a cabbage?

Albus Dumbledore was a master of strategy. No stone unturned, no detail, no matter how trivial, was ever unanticipated.

Bloody hell had Albus meticulously engineered _**this**_?

That meant that Albus planned on coming back from the land of the dementia. In response, Severus instinctively clutched Kendrick close to his chest.

Albus… returning… from the land of the Geriatric, Duffed up Cabbages to find himself… _**married**_ to Severus Snape… and _**mother**_ to Kendrick.

And that idea frightened Severus Snape far more than the Dark Lord ever had.


	21. Chapter 21

Many thanks to MM for her help.

* * *

Filius Flitwick began industriously preparing the Bonding Ceremony for young Kendrick. The candles and other necessary appurtenances were ready. But there was a slight problem as he had no idea what Severus' wife's name was.

"Severus? What is her name?" he asked.

Fatherhood had seeming not only mellowed Severus considerately but had also blunted his razor-sharp mind. Well, Kendrick was a cute, happy baby… though Filius knew **_his_** eyes, knew **_his_** nose, but he had gazed upon a great many eyes and noses during his long tenure at Hogwarts.

"Who?" the young man asked him. "Whose name?"

"Kendrick's mum," explained a secretly amused Filius. "I need to know her name."

The boy swallowed once, and the House Elf pulled at her ears. It seemed that asking Severus for the name had upset both of them. Well, Filius would be charitable. No doubt it was a tough situation for Severus and the House Elf; to deal with both their cabbaged Mistress and young Kendrick.

"Don't pull at your ears, Nessie," was Severus' automatic response. "Al. It's a shortened version. Shortened the name because… just…"

Severus paused and swallowed once again, "Will that be…. a problem?"

"No, no, that's fine." Filius quickly assured Severus. The young mage relaxed until Albus' familiar thwacked him in the head with his bum wing as the Phoenix seemed quite determined to imprint himself on the baby's consciousness.

_Albus's eyes were that color blue… and once upon a time, his nose was straight. Looked a little bit like that. What an odd thought, _Filius chastised himself. _Where ever did it come from? Maybe I'm just missing him more today as this would be a festive occasion that he'd be delighted to preside over. _

It was then that Fawkes hit Severus once more with his bum wing, causing a bit of a commotion, and Filius promptly focused on getting young Kendrick properly blessed and sanctified.

* * *

_I wish you'd cease battering me with your wing,_ Severus informed Fawkes. _I'm not your Personal Phoenix Plaything._

_Had to distract Filius_, the bird cranially chirped. _He's dangerously intelligent. _

Severus was at a loss for words. HE had to be, as his heart was literally in his mouth, about to jump out and do a merry jig. **_Fawk_**… err…. **_Whatever_**… Filius was putting the pieces together? Shouldn't he be more concerned about snogging Minerva until she was breathless? Rather than wondering why Kendrick looked so familiar?

_So I had to hit you with my wing. Last thing we need is for Filius to ponder how your son is the offspring of a supposed dead man. _

_I think he'd be more perplexed about Kendrick being the son of TWO men, _was Severus' helpful quip. _That is not the normal way of acquiring a baby. Most of the time, the lucky couple looks at the Sunday advertisements. _ For additional snark, Severus softly added, _Sunday is the best day for bargains_.

Fawkes' voice was quite soft when he finally responded.

_They will not understand that he is Lost to us. My mage is Astray, and there is nothing that I can do to bring his Mind back to him. Even if all the scattered pieces are placed together, I fear…. I fear…he is Broken beyond any hope of Mending. The pieces are losing their Adhesive. _

Severus could hear the Phoenix's capitalization, stressing the assorted Spells and Hexes that Albus had endured. Severus Bugger him for a fool, but Severus gave the pugnacious Phoenix a sympathetic pat.

_I do not believe that he foresaw this, _Fawkes explained.

_His adorable prodigy? _

_He did not foresee how long he would be Severed. Also he did not realize that he would be blessed with a full nest…_

_Empty Mind… _inserted Severus, as well, he just couldn't stop himself. It was that type of day, after all.

_Blessed… with a mate, chick and Nessya. After a lifetime of solitude, he would have been delighted._

While Severus pondered being described as Albus' mate, he **_almost_** failed to hear Fawkes' soft yet heartfelt_, I am no longer alone. I have you, the chick and Nessya.I am content. _

_

* * *

_

"Hold Kendrick," Filius instructed. His wand was at the ready, and the small mage was standing on a large rock so he was almost eye to eye with the much taller Severus.

Kendrick was being perfectly well behaved as he was having a bit of kip. Well, it was probably quite exhausting being adorable, Severus had to give his son **_that_**. HE wouldn't know, as he had been born ugly and repeatedly cursed with the Ugly Hex.

"Now," Filius continued. "All stand around Severus and let us hold hands."

Color Severus completely unsurprised that Minerva was quick to slip her hand into Filius' small one, and well, Nessie… Nessya… had to be gently convinced by Fawkes to grasp Filius' other hand. The trembling House Elf had been quite content to hide her face by tightly hugging her Master's leg during her part of the ceremony until instructed otherwise. Fawkes, naturally, oversaw everything from his perch on Severus' shoulder.

It was a surprisingly quick ceremony but its simplicity still affected Severus deeply. Each attendant swore to protect his child. But not just protect, but to **_love_**, **_cherish_** and **_teach_** Kendrick… and **_to give him wings, _**so he could **_soar_**. He tried to hide his emotions but naturally Minerva was having none of it.

"He's beautiful," she informed Severus.

"Passable," was his response.

"Not fooling me," was her tart retort. He was about to return in kind, perhaps make a cutting comment that Filius needed a good snogging in appreciation after all his hard work but Nessie took that very moment to "Pop" back into the field, with several large, overflowing picnic baskets. Severus cursed himself as he was so enraptured with Kendrick that he hadn't noticed that Nessie had vanished.

"Nessie is made nice party food? Nessie make **_real_** food? No magic House Elf food, but real food, like Master liking. Is pleasing Master? Fish and chips and chippie sauce? Pumpkin Pasties? Treacle Tarts? Nessie is pleasing Master? Nessie is having tasty treats for pretty Fawkes? Nessie do well? Nessie keeping both of Nessie's eyes on Mistress. Mistress being deeply sleeping."

The House Elf gazed up at her Master adoringly, her hands clenched in quiet entreaty. Severus realized that she was frantically hoping that her unanticipated and extremely exuberant food preparation would balance out her bad behavior of earlier.

What had Albus said to him? During those times that he had been at his most despairing?

"Yes, Nessie, you have done extremely well," he quietly assured the House Elf. Uncertain of the propriety of doing so, he gave her a quick, blink-and-you-would-have-missed-it-and-besides-Severus-Snape-would-never-unbend-to-do-THAT caress on her head. She hid her delighted smile behind her hands in an attempt to present herself as having a suitably grave demeanor. But her ears were quite animated. And she bounced…no… danced… around as she prepared the picnic.

"She's lucky to have you," Filus informed Severus during their 'party'. Severus sniffed in disbelief yet Filius shook his head. "Others would have delighted in crushing her soul still further. When… when we finally win this bloody war, I'll fix her ears."

Severus said not a word, instead he watched as his House Elf skipping and springing about the place, deliriously overjoyed that her Completely Screwed Up Master had Patted her on her head. Merlin's bloody scrote, she was **_delirious_** with glee. The pathetic sight made his stomach clench.

"I lack the skills to repair her ear," Severus finally and regretfully admitted.

"I'm not surprised, considering those wounds were caused by a Hexed blade," Filius explained. In a soft tone, he repeated his reassurance to a still disbelieving Severus. "She's very lucky to have been given to you."

And Severus felt... sorrow… for his House Elf.

* * *

Thanks to a Time Tuner than had mysteriously gone astray, Severus and his little family ended back at their home a few minutes after they left. Nessie took the sleeping Kendrick from Severus and placed him in his cot, quickly checked on her Mistress and then she returned back to Severus. She was carrying a wooden walking stick and she gingerly presented it to Severus.

"I don't need any assistance in walking," he protested.

"Nessie is **_bad_**. Bad, Bad Nessie embarrass Master in front of his Good Friends. Bad, Stupid, Ugly Nessie take punishment now," she softly explained. "Master very important person. Deserves better House Elf. Bad Nessie is shaming Master because Nessie telled Master that Nessie loves him. Nessie stupid. Nessie forgetting her place. Master needing to punishing Bad, Bad Nessie."

The House Elf was having literal seizures of tremors and her big brown eyes were full of tears. Her mismatched ears were flat against her head and all in all, she looked the very Elfy Embodiment of House Elf Misery.

"Nessie be brave. Nessie no cry out as Nessie is knowing that Nessie Bad."

To Severus' intense revulsion, Nessie closed her eyes and put her hands over her mouth, to muffle her cries of pain.

"Nessie," Severus protested. His House Elf's attitude was raising painful phantoms from his past.

"Nessie needing punishment!" She explained through her hands.

He searched for inspiration, focused on the very strong possibility that Nessie would self-inflict something if she deemed his punishment unsuitable. Then, Severus decided on her punishment.

"Very well, here is your punishment," Severus explained. "You will write lines. You will write '**_Nessie is a Good House Elf'_** in English five hundred times or until you believe it."

The House Elf opened her eyes and moved her hands lower. Her hands were tightly clenched together and she looked quite discombobulated. Her ears were no longer flat against her head, but now they were wildly twitching.

"Nessie no know how to write in Master's language," she protested. "Stupid Nessie only know Elven writing."

"Really?" Severus questioned. He knew perfectly darn well that Nessie wasn't proficient in writing. Yes, she could READ it, but for some reason, the little House Elf couldn't write her Majesty's language. "Well, then you're just going to have to repeat it five hundred times. In fact, you'll have to say 'Nessie is a good House Elf and her Master is quite delighted with Nessie' every time you so much as think that you're Bad. You're to say it fifty times."

Severus nodded his head once, and Nessie just stared at him.

"Time for bed," Severus then commanded. Really, it had technically been a long day, though it was still a might early for the family to be tucked away for the night.

"Nessie…" whispered Nessie.

"Nessie can whisper her punishment until she falls asleep," he informed her. "I also **_never_** wish to see you mangling your ears **_ever_** again. Now off to bed with you."

She just stared up at him, her heart in her big, brown eyes.

He gently pushed her toward the bed, and made sure that the House Elf actually got into the bed. For additional assurance, he put the sleeping Al's arm around Nessie. She was softly, fervently whispering her 'lines' and Severus decided that he should check on Kendrick. Not because he was fleeing from the uneasy situation of soothing his emotionally needy majordomo. No, no, Kendrick needed to be checked and Nessie needed her sleep. His son was awake, looking at him with the twinkling, blue eyes of Albus. Uncertainly, Severus put his finger next to his son's hand and Kendrick latched onto it.

"Your Uncle Fi is busy making happy plans for what happens after the war is won. I just don't know what will happen to us when the truth comes out," admitted a somber Severus. "What with your rather irregular conception?"

* * *

Filius Flitwick was rather somber after the afternoon's festivities. Minerva struggled to cheer him, finally plopping herself next to him on her davenport.

"Whatever is the matter?" She gently asked. Minerva kept her tone light, trying to hide her concern over the peculiarity of a **_morose_** Flitwick.

"Talking to Severus today. Foolish natterings about what we'd do after winning the war. Hopes about fixing Nessie's poor ears… getting married again," admitted Filius. That last comment was en sotto voce and not meant to be heard by Minerva, but the animagus' hearing was cat sensitive.

"Filius," was Minerva's soft response. One simple word, but Filius heard everything Minerva put into that solitary word. _Do not give voice to unattainable dreams._

"I think I'll have better luck with the former," was his easy response. "No hopes on the latter. You just won't permit me behind your walls. You're more than agreeable to have sex, but you will not let me get emotionally close. Physical intimacy without the emotional involvement? It would be just sex."

Minerva's mouth dropped into a silent "O".

"Min, I'd like nothing more than to make love to you. To prove to you despite my diminutive stature, that I am fully capable of satisfying you, physically, emotionally… spiritually. But it would be a complete commitment for me, Minerva. A promise that **_must_** be reciprocal, Minerva. But you can not commit to even the barest whisper of a promise. This war has become your be all and end of it all. Truly, you are Albus' heir. I don't know if Albus would be proud? Or would he weep?"

"You've given up on me," whispered a spellshocked Minerva.

"No, love. You've given up on yourself," Filius explained. "I don't have the energy to keep throwing myself against your walls. I'm no Don Quixote tilting at giants. I'm old… and I'm knackered… and I may not live to see the end of this war, Minerva."

"Don't say that," objected Minerva.

"I have always wished for honesty between us. I think you're a wonder. But I remember how much I adored my wife, and how bereft I was after Merry died. I fear more and more that I am destined to experience that agony once more, without any remembered joy to soften it. I… opened myself up to you… and….you know that I desire more in our relationship… a deepening of affections which you are unwilling to give me."

"Filius," protested Minerva.

"I say you are unwilling, because I **_know_** that you are **_not_** incapable. I have more faith in you and your magnificent heart than you do," explained Filius.

She kissed him then. Hard, passionate. Desperate that he could feel what she couldn't permit herself to say in words. Filius barely responded, with none of his usual enthusiastic zeal, before he put his small hands on her shoulders, gently separating them.

"Give me another chance, spend the night," Minerva pleaded. "I'll take this public. I'll tell everyone that will listen and especially those that won't, how much I care for you."

Flitwick shook his head. "Should not. Must not. **_Can not _**spend the night with you**_. _**Goodbye, my dearest Minerva."

"Tell me what I must say so you will stay," was her response. "Tell me what you want to hear?"

She honesty didn't know what he wanted, still, after all this time.

"I have searched so hard for the smallest clue from you, Minerva. An indication that you felt the same way I do. Something…unprompted… I would have…gladly… cherished….the slightest hint… that there was an emotional bond between us. We took this slowly so you'd become comfortable." Filius paused, and then slowly continued. "I had feared your ridicule when I admitted my strong regard for you. Never did I believe that your ridicule would be better than dealing with the soul-sapping… ambiguity of your affection for me."

"I warned you," was her only defense.

"That you did, and I, unwisely, hoped that in time, you'd want more. In my hubris, I thought that I could be the man to convince you to let go and let **_live_** for however long remains to us, Minerva. I so miss… how we used to talk."

"Don't go," Minerva softly requested. Her voice was steady, refusing to admit to anyone, especially herself, how this was affecting her.

"I **_must_**," was his mild refusal. "Your fortifications have defeated me."

* * *

A dejected Filius returned to his quarters, and poured himself a jigger of spirits. Raising his glass in a toast, he saluted the small portrait of his late wife. Merry's likeness was quite displeased with him and she shook her head at the drink in his hand.

"I'm… tired," he informed his wife. Not a defense, but merely the truth. "That poor little House Elf. Her previous Mistress… deliberately maimed her. The sheer savagery … and how Nessie rejoices over the smallest of kindnesses just brought it all home to me. How I miss the littlest things, fighting for my fair share of the covers, debating how much tea to use for two perfect cuppas. It's been so long, Merry. So long since… My bed is so large and empty. "

"And I've been foolish," Filius regretfully admitted. "I thought I could convince a lion to be happy as a tabby. It's rather comical. How she's perfectly willing to snog at the drop of a witch's hat, yet she won't **_talk_** to me. I should know by now that I want someone who is willing to express their feelings that I need to look toward a Badger. To Helga Hufflepuff!"

He drank the jigger quickly before he poured himself another one. Merry gave him an intense glare at his imbibing and he changed it into a very weak sleeping potion. "Just a little something to help me sleep. It will give me pleasant dreams. Don't worry, love, I'll stop drinking toasts to your House."

The Charms Master put his hand on his wife's portrait. She reached for him and for a moment, Filius felt her hand against his.

"Anyway, it's long past time for bed as I'm rather maudlin," Filius finally decided. "Plus, I'm feeling a little fuzzy. In a good way, Merry, so don't you worry."

It took a little bit of time, but Filius Flitwick managed to crawl into his bed. He pulled the duvets over him and he dreamt very pleasant dreams of a long legged witch.

* * *

Action was required.

Minerva McGonagall knew that.

However, she was Gryffindor from the top of her crooked hat and down to the tip of her tartan sock clad big toe. Conflict required bravery and courage and most importantly, direct, physical battle. Not words, but **_action_**. Minerva had never been particularly clever with **_words_**. Magical words, yes, she had easily mastered, but the vocabulary of pure emotion? Left her tongue-tied and mute, which is why she had always marveled at how easily expressing himself came to Filius.

The Charms Master had been more than patient with her, gently wooing her and like a great, big bloody prat, she couldn't voice her appreciation, couldn't give him what he wanted. It was only to be expected that a weary Filius had finally decided to wash his hands of her. Perhaps, in time, Filius might be willing to be friendly once again. Yet Minerva knew their treasured friendship would always be strained by her inability to express herself.

She wasn't thinking clearly. Minerva was tired and frustrated. Not with just the war, but everything… especially _Filius_. Filius had made it abundantly clear that what he desired was emotional closeness with her. Couldn't Filius understand that Minerva was exhausted? That the war was taking everything and then some?

No, Filius was Ravenclaw. Had to bloody overanalyze their relationship, quality and quantify it. Dissect it and vivisect it. Couldn't be merely happy that their pairing worked. No, he needed to research it, write a bloody thesis complete with footnotes and an appendix. No doubts in the hopes of improving it.

Bloody hell, it **_worked_**. Couldn't that be enough for him?

Really, Filius needed to stop being such an academic. He really needed to stop over-analyzing life and just live it.

Love life.

**_Love her._**

Minerva McGonagall was Gryffindor.

That's why she went to his quarters and slipped into bed next to him.

* * *

Filius woke when he felt the mattress shift. One finger pressed against his lips and … someone … **_Merry_**?!? No… **_Minerva_** … kissed him on the cheek. What was she doing in his bed? Well, where one of her hands was located, it was pretty obviously **_what_** she was doing… but… their conversation of earlier? Had she realized the truth in what he had said?

"Minerva?" he softly questioned. He was feeling… blurry… not as sharp as he'd prefer… and… she was in his bed…

"Stop thinking so bloody much, Filius," she purred. Then she kissed him. For a moment, he didn't do anything,and then Filius began eagerly demonstrating to Minerva why taking a Ravenclaw Charms Master to your bed was very, very educational.

* * *

Filius pleasured, explored and worshipped her, delighting in being able to share this experience with her. Thanks to his splash of goblin blood that had not only kept his hair dark well into second century, he was also blessed with increased stamina and vitality, so he waited until she was utterly fulfilled before he took his own enjoyment.

Later, in the delightful languor that only comes from exhaustive mattress bouncing, Filius couldn't help but tease Minerva.

"Told you we'd be a perfect fit," he gently reminded her.

"Is that pride I hear?" a tired Minerva asked. She was slowly stroking Filius' hair, too blissfully content to do much more than that.

"No," he assured her. "I knew that chief among other concerns you had over us was… if we'd be able to physically manage. You're a healthy, virile young lady. "

"Hush, no talking," a drowsy Minerva chastised him. "You know that I hate that."

Filius tensed as Minerva's quip had stabbed him through his heart. Foolishly, stupidly, he had thought he had persuaded Minerva through the powers of his words. To take a chance, to let him into her heart.

**_No, no, NO, you stupid prat. She just let herself slip into your bed. And like a love-lorn firstie, you fell for it. You FELL for it._**

"Yes," was Filius' slow response. "I know how much you hate talking."

* * *

It had taken Severus far too long to fall asleep, and so the next day found him sluggished and sharp-tongued. Nessie had sniffled herself to sleep and Severus hadn't had a bloody clue how to handle her. Instead of comforting her, he had listened to her whisper her lines until she had fallen asleep.

Foolishly, he had thought that his unique solution to Nessie's seemingly intrinsic need for punishment would make everything better. There had been no physical retribution, and hadn't Albus repeatedly attempted to make Severus think happy clappy thoughts to boost his self-esteem?

Well, it hadn't ever worked for Severus and Happy Thought Therapy didn't seem to have done any good for Nessie. The determined to please her Beloved Master House Elf had nearly tripped him twice today in her zealous attempts at making him breakkie.

He had barely taken a sip of his tea when Lucius arrived, informing him that his presence was required with all due haste by the Dark Lord.

"He's made comments about why you haven't picked anyone as Kendrick's godfather," Lucius warned Severus.

"I don't believe in God," Severus tersely explained. "Seems ridiculous to have a godfather."

"He wants to be guardian to Kendrick. You better do it soon as he's losing his patience," explained the platinum haired Malfoy.

Severus inhaled slowly and then exhaled.

_Don't panic. Don't let your emotions control you. _

When he spoke, there was no hint of his internal turmoil. No sign of weakness, for there was a war to win. Severus knew how to bluff and bluff well.

"I should have Nessie prepare the festivities then."

* * *

A long satisfying stretch. Then another, as Minerva felt simply marvelous; loose-limbed and relaxed. Truly, the reality of bedding a Charms Master was even **_better_** than the salacious rumors had promised. She stretched again and then reached for Filius. He wasn't there, so she Transfigured her shirt into a silky dressing gown and went off in search for him.

He was preparing breakfast and she was rewarded with a shy smile.

"Sleep well?" was his greeting.

"Yes," Minerva agreed.

The two of them looked at other for a bit; morning after awkwardness having made a command appearance and then Filius motioned toward the table. "Well, tuck in."

They ate in silence, a stillness of tensions and uncertainty, not companionable silence. In the bright light of morning, Minerva was realizing that ambushing Filius in his bedroom was quite probably not the smartest way of handling the delicate situation. He **_WAS_** Ravenclaw personified. Logical, rational thinking and discussions were his modi operandi, not sexing and snogging into submission.

Meanwhile, a pensive Filius had been awake most of the night, facing head on the unhappy realization that the woman he loved did not feel the same way.

"Min," Filius finally spoke. "Can we talk?"

"Whatever is there to talk about?" was Minerva's quick response. She hid her hands beneath the table so Filius wouldn't see how they shook.

Filius looked at her and then he gently questioned, "What am I to you?"

"Filius… " A weary Minerva protested. "Please…."

"No, Minerva. I need to know…What am I to you? What is this between us? What was last night?"

For a wonder, the normally stanch yet cheery Filius was hesitant… uncertain. Why wasn't last night enough for him? She couldn't give him everything that he desired, why couldn't he be happy with the few pieces that she **_could_** give him?

**_Because he's worth more than crumbs from the table. Because forthright Filius had been bluntly honest in what he wanted. Because he thought that by my sharing his bed last night that I was agreeing to open myself emotionally to him. That last night was a promise between us. _**

Minerva's silence made Filius even more withdrawn.

"Last night was just sex for you," was his painful admission. "You know how I feel for you. I love you, Minerva."

It was the first time he had voiced the depths of his feelings, but Minerva had known. Known it instinctively, yet refused to admit it to herself.

"And you know that I do not have the time or the energy necessary to be in love," was Minerva's quick retort.

"Yes, the war. I remember hearing about it," was Filius' dry quip.

Normally, Filius' dry humor would lighten Minerva' weary heart. Not so now. She was feeling guilty, and emotionally over her head.

"I thought we had an understanding as I trusted you. We worked together well. But you knew that the War comes first," was Minerva's defense.

"The War is the be-all and the end-of-it-all for you. There's no room for anything else for you. It's your passion, it's your lover, it's your life," Filius said. "I am a jealous lover, Min. I prefer that it's only two in a relationship."

He whispered to himself, "And to think I had always worried that it would be Albus… "

"Albus?" Minerva protested. "He's **_gay_**."

"But you were his most devoted follower. His second in command, the one most likely to take up the fight if he should fall. Even now his shadow haunts everything you do."

Minerva was speechless and Filius held out his hand in a silent appeal.

**_Tell me I'm wrong, Minerva. Tell me that I'm mistaken. _**

"I don't need this," was Minerva's ending protest. Her head was pounding and she needed to leave Filius' quarter. She needed her migraine potion before she was flat on her back in pain.

"No, you don't. I realize that my feelings toward you might prove awkward when we work together. Fortunately, I will able to put this matter entirely behind me." He tapped his forehead with his right hand, and then with his nimble finger began to pull thin, wispy streams of nothingness from his head. The transparent filaments were placed into his left hand.

"What are you doing?" Minerva asked.

"Excising my feelings for you. Only a few more and then it will be like it never was," he promised Minerva. "We'll be able to work together without any ill-feelings or embarrassment on my end."

He brought his left hand up to his mouth and he gently blew on it. The strings… the emotions… his love for Minerva were quickly dispersed into the air, landing like dust on the furniture.

"All done now," Filius easily stated in a cheerful tone. "More tea?"

"No, thank you. I have a meeting at ten," lied Minerva. She left the room and quickly retreated back to her quarters.

In Filius' bed room, his wife' painting sadly shook her head.

"Minerva doesn't realize that the first thing a Dueling Champion does is perfect their bluff."


	22. Chapter 22

We left Lucius insisting that the Dark Lord wished to be the proud Godfather to Kendrick. Meanwhile Minerva and Filius had bounced on his mattress leaving them with morning after regrets.

Thanks to K for her help on this chapter.

* * *

Really… Lucius was being too persistent on The Dark Lord's allegedly avuncular interest in young Kendrick. It was impossible that Lucius would willingly promote a relationship that would increase Severus' standing among the other Death Eaters.

_**Quick, think! **_

Why, at the times he needed the most mental clarity, did his rational voice sound so much like Albus Dumbledore?

_**I am thinking! **_ Severus pointlessly protested to his Dumbledore Doppelganger.

_**Severus, you need to see all the angles in this. The Dark Lord holds no true favorites. No, he favors survival of the fittest. **_

_**Sharks, smelling blood in the water, frenziedly attacking the blooded shark. Severus, wolves – pulling down their weakened prey. He sets one above the other and laughs when his chosen is pulled down by its pack mates.**_

_**Lucius is not your true friend, Severus. He'll help you only as long as it is in his best interest.**_

_**Such is the common theme of the sorry existence better known as my life, **_Severus mentally retorted.

The expected mental chastisement didn't come. Nor the highly probably offer of a psychic lemon drop. Once more Severus reminded himself that Albus was nothing more than a cabbage clad in a colorful costume. He wasn't proficient of doing much more than Kendrick. Mewling, peeing and pooing. Perhaps rolling around like a cabbage.

_**Anything happens to you, Severus, who will keep an eye out on Kendrick and Al?**_

_**Nessie, **_was Severus' instantaneous response. His disapproving Dumbledore double shook his head.

_**Nessie? She loves you, yes, but she's an underage House Elf who has been badly abused. She'd willingly die for you, Severus, and for Kendrick and for Al… **_

_**And what would you have then? **_

Long pause, then when Severus didn't answer because he didn't WANT to think his mental fears, Albus continued.

_**A dead House Elf, Severus. **_

The very idea of Nessie's lifeless body made Severus see _**red.**_

_**Severus calm down! But yes, while she'd do anything for you, should you put her into that position? She'd take Kendrick and Al to Minerva, yes… but it would be at great risk to herself and to the Order. If for any reason Voldemort's followers suspect that you are still loyal to the Order, they will torture her for information.**_

His mental Albus was correct. Nessie, while trustworthy, shouldn't be considered a surefire escape for Kendrick and Al.

"Severus…" The Dark Lord's voice was quite soft.

"My Lord," Severus easily answered.

_**Be careful**_, whispered Albus. _**Kendrick and Nessie depend on you. **_

"How is your son?"

A loaded question, as a proud Severus was all too happy to discuss his son in great detail. How he marveled over the littlest changes in Kendrick, how he cherished the broad, toothless smiles his son gave him when Kendrick recognized him.

However, too much pride in his son would be a liability. After all, Draco and Cissy were Lucius' greatest weaknesses.

Perhaps… a paternal though dry amusement would be the best way to handle it.

"At four months, his development far outshines his mother's," Severus drolly commented. For good measure, he added what he hoped was a proud, patrician nod.

"Still no godfather…" the Dark Lord prompted.

Severus' gut clenched, as he knew he was walking through a minefield. There was no way in hell he'd ever let his son near the Dark Lord. If Kendrick ever thought of creating a Horcrux, Severus would ground him until he was far older than his mother… errr.. Dumbledore.

"No," Severus easily admitted. His stomach was clenched, his heart racing, but he kept his voice composed.

"Lucius had implied that you had the audacity to think of asking me," the Dark Lord prompted. Voldemort's blood red eyes narrowed in speculation and a condescending sort of amusement. "What cheek, Severus!"

"I have no idea why Lucius thinks that. I must confess that particular thought had never crossed my mind," was Severus' candid response.

"Why is that? Is there someone better you have in mind?" Voldemort purred. It was a dangerous sound, which meant that the Dark Lord was quite likely to order one's execution. Or not, it depended all on the Dark Lord's foul whimsy. "Who would be a better Godfather than your Lord?"

Severus paused, and then divine inspiration took over his tongue. "There would be no one better, my Lord. However, for you to sanction my child, I fear his future successes would ever be deemed as due to your favor… rather than natural ability and hard work. I expect my son to prove himself worthy of being your follower."

There, let the Dark Lord digest that for a bit. Hopefully, he'd get a spot of indigestion. Really, he deserved it as a very stressed Severus was developing an ulcer.

"You can take the professor out of Hogwarts," quipped the Dark Lord. "Oh, Severus, why must I constantly remind you that hard work means nothing if you don't have the blood."

There was a rumble of appreciative laughter from the assorted motley hanger-ons, but Severus ignored them. His son was safe…. For now…

* * *

Severus returned to his quarters and found Nessie playing with the babies. Well, the Baby and the Cabbage. Both of which were intently watching the cheerful Nanny Nessie clap her hands. That done, the House Elf tickled both Kendrick and Al's toes with her long fingers. Kendrick giggled while Al's mouth opened. He looked as though he wasn't sure if he should be happy or not with Nessie' ticklish fingers. In Al's current state, it was a complex thought which would require much debate.

"Master's home!" Nessie squeaked which earned more giggles from a beaming, toothless Kendrick and a spurt of finger talk from Al. The fingers were flying in frenzy, but it seemed a mixture of nonsense, where Al was tired and wished to sleep. Yet the Cabbage was quite delighted because Sev was home. Severus knew Al's eagerness over Sev's arrival home was only because Al wished to have a lemon drop before he went to bed.

The Baby kissed by his Proud Father and the Cabbage dutifully given his lemon drop; the helpful House Elf proceeded to bathe both charges. That done without lost of limb or blood spilt, she put them both to bed. However, the Father and Protector of the Happy Babies was not forgotten as Nessie had a proper, hot dinner waiting for him. All of his favorites were nicely prepared and it felt good to be home.

_**Home**_.

Could four small, dreary rooms be a home? Severus pondered that thought for some time and then he decided.

Yes, this was _**home**_.

With his _**family**_.

Home in such a way that Hogwarts had never been Home to him. Hogwarts had always been… a safe haven in his adult life… only because of the Headmaster. But here, he was no longer dependant on another. He was the parent, the protector, the nurturer… well… along with a very zealous House Elf.

And what he needed now was to get Harry Bloody Taking-his-own-Sweet-Time Potter moving because Severus desired his family safe. And by safe, he defined that as them being safe from the Good Guys. No doubt they would be not particularly chuffed with the revelation of Kendrick's parentage. Somehow, Severus knew that Nessie' valiant protestations, that he and Al hadn't done the innie-outie required to produce Kendrick in the some-what traditional fashion, would not sway Minerva's anger.

_**I didn't touch him, Minerva. He was already up the duff when he was presented to me, completely with a purple bow around his belly!**_

Nessie was besotted with Severus, Al and young Kendrick. Really _**not**_ the best character reference when a manic Minerva McGonagall was threatening to castrate him.

_**Really, Severus. Hiding behind a House Elf? How… snivellous. **_

However, it was long past time that Severus pushed the issue. What the _**hell**_ was Potter the Messiah waiting for?

A clue?

Heavenly hosts singing 'Now is the Time'?

* * *

The meeting ended, the crowds dispensed, but Minerva discretely motioned to Filius. The Charms Master was about to slip away into the shadows, like he normally did, unseen among the much taller folks. However, she had managed to catch him before he escaped.

It was different twixt them now. Ever since that one frightening intimate night together, where a heartbroken Filius had realized that she wasn't capable of opening herself emotionally to him.

He was… colder… now.

No, Minerva sternly chastised herself. It wasn't fair to describe Filius as cold. Filius was never chilly, never aloof. Their relationship itself… now that… was cool. There was no doubt that the frost in their friendship was completely due to her, she knew.

"Minerva?" Filius asked, after everyone was gone. He schooled his voice to keep his tone soft.

He _knew_ what she wanted, but this new relationship between them, the _**friendship**_ that remained required that Minerva express herself. No longer would a loving Filius make her a perfect cuppa just because. Never again, would he volunteer to help her during the worst of her migraines. What he had once felt for her and the countless, wordless ways he had expressed it no longer existed.

Because of her.

Each and every day, Minerva learned firsthand of a new way that the selfless Filius had lovingly supported her through her role of Albus' replacement. However there was no way to take back what happened. Even if she admitted that she had been wrong, that she'd try harder next time if he only gave her another chance, Filius had Charmed away his feelings for her.

Leaving nothing behind except for some painful memories.

Fools might say that Love couldn't be Charmed into existence and Charmed out of existence.

However, those naysayers didn't know Filius as well as Minerva did.

His wife had been murdered by Voldemort's followers one hot August day. Her crime? She had the druthers to be a pure blooded witch in love with a half-breed. Minerva remembered full well how a devastated Filius had been physically overwhelmed by his grief. The witch could still hear Fillius' keening when Albus had tried to gently break the news of Merry's death.

Yet, when the first day of class had rolled around, a dry-eyed Filius had taught his students, claiming that he had Charmed away his sorrow.

"I need help… sleeping…" was Minerva's confession. "Between the migraines and the insomnia, I haven't slept more than a few hours at a time… Poppy says that I can't have my potions for another few days. Would you be so kind…to help me… sleep?"

One would hope that the months she had practice soliciting Filius, it would grow easier. This request… got harder and harder for her each and every time she asked. However, the new dynamics required that she solicit his assistance. But she couldn't face him and ask, so instead Minerva closed her eyes while she finished her request.

The first time had been horribly gauche as Poppy had broached the subject with Filius. Actually, the formidable mediwitch had informed Filius that he _would_ be doing it. That decided, she commanded Minerva to take her treatment. As Poppy had explained to Minerva, they couldn't increase her potions and it was now time for drastic action. Damn Poppy for reading some balderdash about Magical Massages being helpful for migraines! Curse her for recalling that Filius had the inclination to take a course or five in it.

And damn Filius' clever hands for giving her ten hours of blissful, dreamless sleep.

If she only _**looked**_ at Filius, she would have seen the agony in his eyes and how his formerly dark hair now had more than a touch of silver. For while he claimed to no longer feel anything more than friendship towards the younger witch, his aloofness was make-believe. A considerate Filius had hoped that the little white lie would make it easier for Minerva but instead it seemed to have made everything worse.

Her headaches had returned with a vengeance, and nothing seemed to ease her pain.

Except for his nimble hands.

And now… now the two of them no longer talked.

Well, that was a lie.

They did talk, idle chin-wagging, but nothing of sustenance, nothing that had the potential to shatter their friendship still further. Merlin knew how much he loathed floundering about, but he had no idea how to handle the current situation.

"My quarters?" Minerva hesitantly requested.

He agreed on a time. He'd slip into her quarters later and Filius would massage her rock-hard muscles until they were pliable and relaxed. Then an emotionally needy Minerva would ask him to spend the night. Filius never said yes, but his deft hands would start to gently undress her.

She… craved… these stolen moments, where someone… where _**Filius**_… would treat her as a woman.

But in the morning, when Minerva woke alone in her empty bed, she'd remind herself that the solitary Albus had the right of it.

The war demanded _**everything**_ and then some. Minerva had long accepted that the war would utterly destroy her.

Her only happiness was that recent events had assured that Filius wouldn't mourn her for very long.

* * *

"Very well now…" was Filius' awkward attempt at a conversation. He motioned toward Minerva's bedroom and tried to smile.

It was closer to a grimace, he was sure.

Fawkes gave him a soft, sleepy coo in welcome and Filius acknowledged the greeting with a nod.

Minerva nodded once and the witch went ahead of him into her bedroom. She slowly walked, as though to her own execution and Filius deeply mourned the death of the vibrant witch that she had once been. He waited a few minutes and then knocked on her door. Only after she had bade him entrance, did he enter her inner sanctum. The tall witch was lying prone on her bed, and Filius clambered onto the bed. The bed barely dipped under his slight weight.

"Ready now?" was his next line in their little play.

He carefully, deliberately, rested his hands on the back on her head, praying to a benevolent goddess that would inevitably occur between them, wouldn't.

Not _**again**_.

However heartfelt his vows were, when Minerva reached for him, whispered for him to _**stay**_… he would. Because he fooled himself into thinking he heard _**something**_ in her tone, something that she couldn't bring herself to say.

To his utter shame, to his absolute disgust, their current relationship consisted mainly of a series of empty and meaningless physical coming-togethers. She felt _**nothing**_ for him. And still he stayed…. Because he was a pathetic, sad little man who adored her, who delighted in the smallest crumb she'd deign to give him. Because Filius hoped that he gave her what she truly needed, a commitment free respite from the war.

He was systematic and methodical when they had sex. So much foreplay, so many kisses, touches were rationed carefully. Any soft words of heart spoken devotion were certainly left unvoiced.

Filius was wary about being too affectionate, and careful not to be too selfless regarding her physical needs. Yes, Minerva had her enjoyment, but it wasn't his end-all and be-all. He made bloody sure he had his own pleasure. It tore his heart to shreds to be deliberately turning his back on all those years of his dear Merry's passionate, loving tutorage. His wife had patiently instructed a desiccated, book-bound intellectual in how the physical expression of love could be so bloody beautiful.

When their coupling was finished, he'd discretely scarper off, not wishing to cause Minerva to feel uncomfortable.

Minerva had asked the first time if he'd stay for breakfast and he had refused. After his refusal, she had never asked again. Her pragmatic nature was a good thing. Because if she asked again, if he stayed for breakkie, he'd begin to foolishly hope that there was more to their liaison than satisfying Minerva's physical needs.

* * *

Sex had occurred as he had both feared and hopefully anticipated.

There would a few minutes before he could coherently think once again, where he would allow himself the pleasure of lying next to her. Where he could pretend that he was lying sated and blissful, content to be next to the woman he had just loved. Then once his good sense returned and his blood cooled, Filius Flitwick would leave.

That was the standard arrangement. Before he left her room, Filius would ensure that he was respectable, so Minerva's reputation would be maintained. While he was making sure he was tucked in and zipped up, Minerva would whisper a soft 'thank you'.

'Pleasant dreams,' would be his answer.

That was the unspoken agreement between them. Today, the rules were thrown out of the window as Minerva straddled him, carefully positioning herself just so… before she leaned over and began to nuzzle Filius' sensitive ears.

He had just a splash of goblin blood in his veins. It gave him his longevity, his short stature, his large feet, a suitably sized appendage for the discerning, adult witch, and a neck that was a bloody erogenous zone. And his ears…

The bloody minx was working his left ear, nuzzling, kissing and gently nipping it. It was bloody titillating and he couldn't bloody think because she was … and he… couldn't bloody think… because his right ear was being ….teased… and bloody hell… bloody, bloody hell… he was _**FIRMLY**_ in his second century… what the _**hell**_ did she think he was capable of? He wasn't a seventeen year old buck caught in the Quidditch pitch!

There was no way… no way… well… maybe he doth protest too much …he seemed to have somehow miraculously dropped a dozen plus decades off his age. She was whispering for him to stay and... she kept teasing him, driving him wild.

Then Minerva stopped kissing him. Instead, she just watched him, a challenging look in her eyes. Her unruly locks made her appear like a pagan goddess, focused on her sacrificial offering.

Bloody hell, she was _**gorgeous**_.

Well, if the witch wished to play games, Filius Flitwick could certainly tantalize her, touch by touch. And so, after a great deal of taunting and teasing on both their parts, they frenziedly coupled again. This time, Filius was barely able to keep his eyes open by the time the minx was completely satisfied.

Had to get out of her bed… he was so tired… would be so nice…just to sleep…. He'd close his eyes… just for a minute… just for a minute…

The exhausted Filius was asleep almost before he closed his eyes. He certainly didn't hear Minerva wish him pleasant dreams.

* * *

Minerva lay next to the knackered Filius, wishing the night wouldn't end. That tomorrow morning wouldn't come and find her alone.

_Albus always said that you were underestimated as a dueling champion. That people couldn't see beyond your small frame and realize the true danger of facing your steadfast, lion-hearted nature. Yet in spite of your fierceness, you are the most compassionate soul I've ever met. However, I'm sad to confess that you met your match with the Ice Witch. _

She snuggled next to him, delighting in the chance to curl up next to him. Really, Filius was the perfect size for snuggling. He didn't snore, he didn't thrash, he shared the covers…. The Charms Master was bloody brilliant, blessed with a keen sense of humor...

And Minerva was losing him, bit by bit.

Each time, a needy Minerva asked him to stay, she sensed his mental debate. His reluctant agreement came slower and slower due to the inner turmoil that their relationship was causing him. Flitwick was too upright a man to be satisfied with … whatever… their relationship currently was. Brusquely, Minerva wiped the tears from her eyes. She couldn't weep because once she started, she knew that she'd never stop.

Whatever this was between her and Filius, it certainly didn't classify as 'friends with benefits'…

_You're slipping through my finger tips, Filius. And I'm still hurting you… _

They were still entwined when there was a loud banging on the door. The noise caused Filius to bolt upright in bed, and he looked at the clock on her dresser.

Three in the morning. Why the hell were they banging on her door? It wasn't good, whatever it was. Nothing nice ever happened at this ungodly hour.

"Bugger," he growled. "I fell _**asleep**_!"

Whoever it was, they will still pounding on the door, so the naked Charms Master gestured quickly, popping out of Mineva's bedroom. Mineva got dressed hurriedly, with a lick, a promise and three Charms that she had learned early on as a Hogwarts' student when Professor Dumbledore had done daily inspections of his charges. Fawkes was awake, chattering his concern. The Phoenix's wings were outstretched, ready to launch heavenward. Though Fawkes knew that he couldn't fly.

"Whatever is the matter?" Minerva growled as she pulled open her door. "Fire? Rioting? Famine?"

Arthur Weasley pushed his way in. "Minerva, the castle is under attack. We need to relocate it and Remus is starting the ritual. Where's _Filius_?"

"What? I don't know where Filius is? Why would I know where Filius is?" Minerva protested.

There was a patter of small feet running and an out of breath Filius Flitwick popped his head into Minerva's quarters.

"I didn't hear you knock," he protested. "Rowena should have wakened me!"

Arthur looked at both wizards and then he looked at Minerva's black settee. He said not a word that there was a small Filius sized jacket and necktie strewn over its back. However, he seemed quite delighted.

* * *

Kendrick was walking! With a great deal of help as Nanny Nessie had to assist him. His son was only eight months old… yet he was walking! How amazing!

"Let's meet Papa!" Nessie cheerfully insisted.

His son giggled as Nessie helped support him. With a careful, exaggerated steps, she helped Kendrick 'walk' to his father. The baby was beaming; delighted to see his Papa and he shrieked his excitement when his father picked him up from the ground. Al, on the other hand, appeared a bit put out.

"I'd pick you up, Cabbage," Severus informed Al. He struggled to hold his wiggling son in his arms while he spoke to Al. "But you're too heavy for me to lift."

For good measure, he patted Al on his head. Dumbledore was still wearing a pout.

"Al…" Severus protested. "I can't pick you up. So don't pout. Come on, don't pout, Al. I'll buy you a squeaky toy if you stop pouting. Do you think at your advanced age, you really should pout?"

Al was definitely sulking. It was an incongruous sight, what with his tasseled hat, his short beard, his braided white hair and a sulk on his face.

"I'll read you a story tonight," Severus decided. Then in a wheedling tone. "How about Babbitty Rabbitty?"

The cabbage was weakening but he shook his head. No, Al didn't want a story about a bunny. Al didn't like the bunny story.

"Grumble the Grubby Goat?" was Severus' counteroffer.

Al adored the Grubby Goat story. Severus had thought himself quite the wit as he had included Abe the grubby goat herder in the first recitation of story and now, Al always poked him when he left out the grimy goat tender.

Really, being a father was far harder than Severus had ever anticipated. Bedtime stories had to be approved and their content improved for impressionable young ears. Fortunately, Nessie and her barometric ears was nearby to ensure that he didn't cock it up too badly. Whenever Nessie's ears were flat against her skull, Severus knew that meant one thing. That Stupid Severus had done something wildly inappropriate. Such as when he had made chopping noises during the only time he had read Babbitty Rabbitty to Al.

Happily, tonight, Nessie's ears were upright as she was delightedly dancing around the dinner table. There were three places set, one for Father, one for Al plus one for Nessie. There was a high chair for Kendrick, so the entire family was eating together.

They had just started on their dinner when there was a loud pounding on the door. Nessie's ears went down, Kendrick began to wail and Al looked unhappy.

"I'll handle it," Severus informed the House Elf. "Calm the children down."

He opened the door and Lucius pulled him out into the hallway.

"We found Hogwarts," exclaimed an exuberant Lucius. "It's time to crush the rebellion."


	23. Chapter 23

**Synosis:** It's been quite a while since we left our Heroic House Elf Nessie with her charges, so a brief review. The Death Eaters have found Hogwarts!

Thank you for K for her help in the chapter. I really do have an ending for this story. I promise!

* * *

Filius was a sympathetic soul, perhaps a tad too sympathetic, as really, there was a rebellion occurring, and should he truly grow misty eyed over the agonized groans of the protesting Hogwarts?

"Come on, sweet girl." He gently patted the heart-stone of the castle, deliberately ignoring the bemused and skeptical expression on the face of Remus Lupin. In Fillius' mind there was no doubt that Hogwarts was a stately lady who needed a great deal of encouragement to move her aching bones. "Come now, lady love. You can do this. I know, it gets harder and harder each time you move, but it's time to leave. My old bones are aching in sympathy, love, but we do need you to take your children to some place safe. Your badgers, your eagles, your lions and your snakes all need you to move."

There was a rumbling response and Filius nodded. Hogwarts was answering the ancient Charms, preparing for the Translocation spell. It had been Salazar Slytherin's own luck that had prompted Filius to research the history of the school, causing him to discover that it had been moved at least twice prior to its location in the Scottish countryside. And what had been done twice could always be done again.

"Fifteen minutes," he tersely informed Remus. "And no, there's no way to shorten the time required. I could, but I might lose half the castle."

"I'll help defend the gate," a nervy Remus decided.

The werewolf quickly left the Charms Master, who again gently stroked the heart-stone. "Dear heart, forgive me; I don't want to leave you alone, but I must protect my other love. Don't be jealous, you know that you have owned my heart since I was a wee lad of ten."

The castle sounded once more. A conciliatory tone to Filius' musical ears, assuring him that She understood his conflicts and absolved him of any guilt in abandoning Her during her labour pangs.

"I'll be back, love. To help put you to bed once more," he promised with a smile. He kissed his fingers and then brushed it against the heart-stone. "Parting is such sweet sorrow."

With a silent pop, Filius Disapparated to the Gates of Hogwarts.

_**Where had all the Death Eaters come from? How had they found the Castle?**_

* * *

Minerva was fighting dirty, of which Severus heartedly approved. Yes, he quite approved of her channeling her inner Aife. Minerva, infuriated, was truly an incomparable sight, except for the fact that she was steadily decimating her opponents. The increasing dearth of Death Eaters meant that Severus was getting closer and closer to his chance to be turned into chum.

To make his day even worse, the Bloody Order was aiming for him. Most were aiming to kill him while the few that knew which side he was truly on, were just attempting to wing him. Speaking of winged, at least Fawkes hadn't decided to show up and cheer on the Order.

One of the Weasleys went down, which didn't disturb Severus in the slightest as there were plenty of Spares to replace the ginger-haired cretin.

The only problem with the downed Weasley was that Gideon Arundel, better known as Arthur Weasley to a select few, went mad. He bellowed "_**PERRRRCCCCCCCYYYYYYYYY"**_ like an enraged bull and began systematically cutting his way through the assorted Death Eaters. His savagery was unexpected as he always seemed so milquetoast compared to Molly but now, now, he was a Wizard Enraged.

Naturally, the Brave Death Eaters panicked like a bunch of Screaming Nancys as they were trapped between Aife and the Mad Mage.

Then it happened, Antonin Dolohov went down. Leaving him facing Minerva McGonagall. Their wands were pointed at one another. No friendship seemed to exist between them. No one would have guessed that they were secret compatriots in a war that they were destined to lose. No one could ever dare believe that Minerva wasn't quite delighted in her chance to kill Albus Dumbledore's murderer. No one, including Severus Snape, who was desperately hoping for any sign that Minerva really wasn't about to murder him.

"Minerva," he sneered.

"Severus," was her cold response.

His mind was racing, wondering how best to handle this when some idiot decided to help things along by firing a Hex. Which side had thrown the Hex, he couldn't have told you.

"Leave her! She's _**mine**_!" Severus growled. "Finally, after all these years, I finally am..."

"Cut the long dramatic speeches, Severus. I'm quite tired of them," was her tart response. "One would hope that after teaching overly dramatic teen agers for all these years, you'd cut out the drama. Least you've decided not to wear your long flowing robe."

Fortunately, he was prevented from carrying out his pretense still further as that was the moment when an avenging angel by the name of Filius Flitwick arrived. Unfortunately, Filius handled the situation a bit too well and Hexed him. Not only Severus Snape, but every single one of the Death Eaters that had been staring at the raree show and even the ones that had been running for the hills.

There was a literal avalanche of pain and then mercifully, Severus blacked out.

He woke up in the torture chamber, also known as the infirmary ward where Mediwitch Gaeta Mulgrew was tending him. Every synapse was on fire, and his head hurt. To his surprise a teary Al was sitting next to him as though he was a concerned spouse. And oh no! The cabbage was cuddling a sniffing Nessie. The entire family was visiting the infirmed! Except where was Kendrick?

"Well, you're awake at last. Good thing too, as your House Elf has been making a proper pain of herself. What with you and your wife in to see me, she was caterwauling something fierce. I had to beat her to get her to stop."

Severus sat up then, wincing when he realized that even his teeth hurt, which meant that Filius had pulled out the rarely used Agon Hex. Cruciatus could and would kill you, Agon just made you wish you were dead.

"You _**dare **_to touch my House Elf again, and I will kill you," Severus promised Gaeta.

A red-eyed Nessie gave him a tremulous smile, painfully delighted that her Master was protecting her. That did not lessen his pang that he had failed his most loyal of companions. At Severus' threat, Gaeta just rolled her eyes.

That got Severus annoyed – and thousands of Hogwarts students had learned the folly of that.

"Do not push me, witch." He kept his voice low and moderate.

That particular tone caused her to stop her eyerolling.

"Whatever is the matter with Al?" He demanded. "Who is tending Kendrick?"

"He'll be alright in a few months," Gaeta sniffed her disgust at the fairer, weaker sex."Nine to be precise. The Dark Lord has decided to reinstate his breeding program so I've been busy turning a few of our cock of the walks into broody chicks. Should have heard Malfoy protest, but I think his wife was secretly delighted. Poor thing, she's done worn out thanks to him, so let him experience the joy of pregnancy first hand. As for Kendrick, he's being watched by Narcissa."

"Master happy! Al having another baby!"

The formerly despondent Nessie was now delighted. Al, the presumptive mother-to-be, looked bewildered and perturbed. It was though he had a very good idea that the immutable laws of nature had been overturned by a monster's whimsy and once again he was the victim.

* * *

Al was not happy.

Not happy at all. The Not Goods had hurt Nes and had hurt him. The Not Good had made that noise Bay-bee and Al did not want _**another**_ Bay-bee in his small world.

Bay-bee did not smell nice at times.

Well, yes the Bay-bee sometimes smiled and made soft happy noises when Al was glaring at him. And Nes read to both Al and Bay-bee. Yet, Bay-bee took Nes and Sev's focus away from Al.

Another Bay-bee might cause Nes and Sev to forget about feeding Al!

And Al, while the most forgiving of souls, had not forgotten that Bay-Be had been inside Al and had hurt Al!

Speaking of hurt, Sev was hurt also, and so after the Not Good left the room, Al gently patted a sitting Sev on his head. Much like Sev did when Al was feeling Not Good. He then offered Sev a treasured yellow tart sweet as Al had found much Goodness in stockpiling the treats and sharing them with Nes. Perhaps the yellow thing would work its magic on Sev. Truly, one could not be unhappy with that tart taste in their mouth. Though perhaps Sev would stay unhappy, he was a rather unique situation.

"_**Headmaster**_?" Severus whispered.

That funny noise made Al feel... _**strange**_... as though he should know that word. He saw himself in pretty, sparkly clothes complete with matching fashion footwear and the Bright Thing was rubbing his face. He thought of that Bright Thing. _**Fawkes**_. The Good Thing that was Bright and Beautiful that had comforted him during the worst of his nightmares.

Perhaps the HeadMaster was Fawkes?

"Fawkes?" asked Al. He smiled as he looked around, hoping that Fawkes would come. Somehow Al knew that when he finally saw Fawkes again, everything would be made right in his world.

To his surprise, Severus covered Al's mouth with his hand.

"No _**talking**_," insisted Severus. "No _**talking**_! Bad cabbage, no _**talking**_!"

Really, did Albus need to pout? Severus Snape was struggling to save his life!

* * *

Filius Flitwick's heart was skipping along like a rambunctious toddler. Sternly, he warned his heart to behave, and it ignored him.

"Steady, steady," he whispered, willing his heart to slip back into a steady one, two, three, four beats. Not the syncopated on the offbeat combined with skipping beats.

He was tired, almost too bloody knackered to stand. Moving Hogwarts require the Four House Heads and the Headmistress to do it at the best of times. Hagrid lacked the training so they had relied on Remus to fill the Lion's post. This time, Horace, Pomona and Minerva had been too busy defending and Remus had been needed to help secure the bulwarks.

That had left Filius to power most of the ritual and he wasn't a young mage. It had been a hundred years plus since the kindest of souls had considered him anything less than mature.

Then when the castle had been ready to move, he had gone down to help the defense. Last thing the poor Hogwarts needed would to be freshly relocated and suffering from an infestation of Dark Eaters. And he had found Severus Snape facing Minerva McGonagall, a no-Win situation for the both of them. Minerva might have the experience to battle Severus in a way that either of them from being hurt, but she was exhausted. So he quickly modified an Unforgivable, casted a major Cruciatius on the majority of the Death Eaters and the Agon spell on Severus.

That way, the Death Eaters would believe that Severus had been Cruciated also.

Minerva had not been pleased with his instinctive defense of her. However, her silent recrimination could not compare to his monumental self-despite. To turn his _**wand**_ on Severus. To leave the lad behind when the castle relocated to safer grounds!

He had no other option. It kept Severus' cover secure among the Death Eaters because Severus needed to protect his family. It had prevented Minerva and Severus from casting a spell that could not be taken back.

It had also broken his heart.

Filius' heart was shattered, but that was not the worst. This final move had fractured the Hogwarts' heart-stone. She was dying, the castle having given her all to protect her students. In one last burst of energy, she had returned back to Scotland as the grand dame wished to die in her bed.

"Oh, my dear girl," Filius whispered. He placed his hand on the fracture, debating on how he could mend the rupture in her great heart. It would take most of his remaining energy but perhaps, he could. After all, Filius owed so much to the Great Lady, the one that had first sheltered a small half-breed wizard and then, in time, had turned in Home. Focusing on the crystal lattices, he brought them back together again, healing the rend.

The elderly Filius physically collapsed then, having given his all to Hogwarts.

* * *

"Father?" A hallucinating Percy murmured. Everything _**hurt**_, yet someone was carrying him, oh so carefully. As though fearful to jar him. He didn't remember much; just that he had seen _**HIM**_. The bastard who had dropped off his parents' body as though they were rubbish. His siblings hadn't cared, they hadn't tried to avenge their parents and Percy had tried, though it had require him to cut his way through a dozen odd Death Eaters to get to _**HIM**_.

"Shh," whispered an unfamiliar voice. "Percy, you need to sleep."

"Da? I tried to kill him," whimpered Percy. "I really tried ... for you and Mum. I just couldn't get to him."

"Go to sleep, Percy. They hit you with a _**Vermillious **_and you're been burned. You need to rest. Molly wants you to close your eyes, Perc."

The stranger carried him to a cot, and then refused to leave him. There was a great hullabaloo as all his brothers plus his sister were there also.

"Gideon?" Poppy asked. Her tone was a tad too close to strident as really there were a great many Weasleys in the ward. "Bill? Only _**one**_ person can be here."

"I'm _**staying**_, don't even try to remove me..." the threat in the stranger's deep voice silenced Percy's assorted siblings. "Poppy, they will be leaving as_** I'm**_ staying. Bill, you tell Muriel about Percy and you can advise her that I'm here. She'll wish to be here also, so perhaps one of you will be needed to mind Al if Dora can't do it. If Muriel can trust you with our son, which I doubt as you have proven your irresponsibility in spades. Now get out, Percy needs quiet. "

The horde left quickly, like a pack of dogs with their tails between their legs.

"They're gone, Perc," whispered... Gideon?

No... Da... it was _**Da**_...

"_**Da**_?" Percy whispered.

"Need to get you undressed, lad. To see how badly you've been burned. It'll hurt, but I'll be here," promised his father. "You close your eyes, try to sleep. Poppy, he's allergic to some of the more common ingredients in pain-relief."

Percy struggled not to cry out while Poppy and Da removed his clothes. He drank a tart tasting potion and struggled to stay awake while Poppy and Da slathered him with assorted poultices.

If Da was alive? Did that mean Muriel was Mom?

"Someone told me to come down here," a female said. Percy, floating some several feet above the bed thanks to the potions, was aware enough to struggle to cover his bits but his father assured him he was proper. "Dora is watching Al."

There was a sharp inhalation as Molly realized who the patient was.

"Gideon, why are you here?" Molly asked.

"Cat's out of the bag, love." Gideon... Arthur... explained. "A few inches closer and we would have lost him. He would have died not knowing that we're alive."

"Minerva will not be happy," his mother softly protested. "But I'm glad you finally came to your senses."

"I know, but he was going after Severus," Arthur retorted. "Minerva will have to deal with the fact that Percy knows who we are."

* * *

At that time, Minerva was having enough issues to fill her plate, and didn't need more. Somehow Voldemort had discovered the location of Hogwarts, requiring them to defend Hogwarts. She had gone wand to wand with Severus Snape until Filius Flitwick had intervened.

An _**innocent**_ Severus Snape as Fawkes had pointedly reminded her. Not that she had any doubts, but the Phoenix was quite insistent on repeating that Severus Snape was Albus Dumbledore's man. Severus had been stunned by Filius and then Hogwarts had merrily skipped back to the Scottish Highlands. Leaving an injured Severus and assorted Death Eaters in the middle of nowhere!

She had abandoned Severus _**again**_!

_**He understands**_, Fawkes prompted. _**He would not be able to protect his family if you had taken him when the Castle relocated. His mate, his chick and Nessya would be left alone among monsters. Young Nessya would not be sufficient to protect them. **_

Really, Fawkes was a bit avian in his terms. He was constantly referring to Severus' mate as opposed to wife, to the chick instead of the wee bairn.

"Remus?" Minerva asked.

"We're unable to locate any Detection spells attached to Hogwarts. We don't know how they found the school," Remus admitted. He then put up his hand in a feeble attempt at silencing Minerva's protestations. "I know that's not an acceptable answer, Minerva, but Filius might know more."

"Where is Filius?" was her next tart query. Really, where was the dratted wizard? He wasn't on the list of the wounded so the Charms Master _**should**_ be here in the War Council. Regardless of the current tensions between the two of them, Minerva needed his rock steady presence here. "Why are we _**back**_ in Scotland?"

Why not Wales? Why hadn't Hogwarts just plopped down smack in the midst of London? Just a stone's throw from the Ministry?

The answer to that question was once again, Filius. Filius would know why they were in Scotland, because unlike Albus who knew everything, Filius knew everything _**practical**_ worth knowing.

The pounding in her temples swiftly grew overwhelming but still she persevered.

When the meeting ended and there was still no Filius, she requested that her chief lieutenants find him.

* * *

"We're leaving," Severus informed the staff. He got out of bed and swayed. To his surprise, Al grabbed him by the arm.

Severus moved quickly, to make it appear as though he had grabbed for the support, not that Al had offered. The double agent waited until he was steadier on his feet and then he moved toward the door. Fortunately they were alone when what happened next occurred.

"Come along," he growled. "We have to pick up Kendrick from Cissy."

The House Elf seemed reluctant to follow them. Then, as though he realized that they wouldn't leave the House of Torture without the House Elf, Al bent down to pick up Nessie. The House Elf was then cuddled much like a baby, because Al didn't realize that Nessie was sniffing due to her overwhelming happiness. He then walked over to where Severus was standing. His smile was vacant and his blue eyes empty... but no... No.

Al _**wasn't**_ obeying commands.

He _**wasn't**_ thinking for himself.

What had been one of the stages in that dratted book Minerva had foisted on him?

_**A toddler's awareness of adult expectations and need for approval will encourage cooperation.**_

Al tenderly patted the weepy Nessie on her head and offered her a lemon drop.

A lemon drop? _**Another**_ lemon drop!

Could Al be showing the infamous Dumbledore compassion? Compassion for his friends... playmates... a security blanket named Nessie... was most assuredly not a toddler's behavior. Sharing of lemon drops was also not the norm for a toddler as Al's lemon drops had to be strictly rationed. Because the year old Al gobbled them down. And got sick from gorging on them! He couldn't be trusted with more than one.

Al was not two.

HE was certainly _**NOT**_ developmentally older than that. These changes simply couldn't mean that somewhere down deep inside of Albus Dumbledore, whatever damage had been done to him, was slowly repairing itself.

Especially _**NOW**_.

The way Albus was progressing through the various development stages, Albus would wake up tomorrow and desire a broom. A Nimbus 2001 racing broom. And when Severus informed that he couldn't have the broom as Al was now, once again, with child, requiring a safer mode of transportation, a very stroppy Albus Dumbledore would bloody kill him.

_**Another**_ baby! Severus could barely manage to handle the three he had now!

_**Another**_ baby! With an Albus that was returning back from his extended stay in his sans-Sanity Shangri-La.

Severus Snape was so far past dead that there wasn't even a word for it.

Nessie quivered as she feared that his inner debate meant that she had been a very bad House Elf.

"It's not your fault, Nessie," an exhausted Severus informed her, attempting to stop the deluge of House Elf condemnation before it began.

"They hurted Nessie as Nessie trying to keep them aways from Al. Nessie let Bad People hurted Al." Then the tears of happiness went into sobs of sadness.

"You will tell me who hurt you," Severus informed the little House Elf. "I will make sure that they never hurt you again."

"Bad Man's mate who has Master's baby!"

Lucius Malfoy was a dead man. A _**pregnant**_ dead man, Severus remembered. Perhaps he should kill Lucius _**after**_ he spawned. Yes... that would wound Lucius' pride. To be waddling about the place... too bad that creepy Creevey boy wasn't nearby with his ever present camera. Someone truly needed to take pictures of the spectacle.

"Let's take you home and I'll get Kendrick," Severus decided.

* * *

"You should eat," his wife cooed. Her cool, dulcet tones failed to hide the fact that she was most amused by the turn of events. Payback was a bitch, as were certain female members of the Black clan.

Lucius Malfoy pushed away the tray.

"I know, your stomach is feeling a wee sensitive," she continued.

The angry growl that emanated from his throat was almost non-human. Narcissa's smile faded and she shook her head.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "It is my fault."

Her anguish deeply affected Lucius and he reached for her.

"It's not your fault that the Healers don't wish you to have another child. You're delicate," he reminded his wife. "The last time, I truly feared to lose you. There was so much blood and... I worried so."

For all his many faults, Lucius Malfoy truly did love his wife.

"I told you, the others, they meant _**nothing**_ to me. I stood as stud only because the Dark Lord ordered it. Now, now with this, I do not believe that I will be required to do that again. No Pansy, no Millicent, just us."

The two Malfoys embraced and then Severus Snape arrived to collect his son.

* * *

Really. God and Merlin as his witnesses, Severus Snape didn't bate Lucius. There were a few charged comments, a pregnant pause or four and Severus had tried to keep his amusement from showing. But Severus did not endeavor too hard, as Lucius had hurt Nessie. After salt had been liberally spread in the seeping wound that was Lucius' ego, Severus took his son and returned home to find mother-to-be and House Elf asleep in the communal bed.

He couldn't blame them. It had been a very trying day for all concerned. Kendrick was still sleeping so the baby was placed in his cot. That done, Severus Snape crawled into bed and quickly fell asleep. He was so deeply asleep that he didn't stir once, even when Albus Dumbledore softly whispered, "Severus?"

* * *

No Filius, none at all. No one had located him.

Her annoyance turned to concern as Filius prided himself on his punctuality. He was never late for anything, even for his Inquisitions by that Pink Toad.

She was being pulled, as though the Castle was summoning her. Toward the very heart of it, the very place she struggle to avoid at all costs. Because for Minerva McGonagall, standing there, in the very heart of Hogwarts was a shattering experience. Because standing there, the reality of the situation came crashing down on her.

That she wasn't Albus.

That it was beyond narcissistic to think that she deserved to stand as Headmistress in the very location that the Founders had once stood.

That there was no way in hell that she was capable of handling the current crisis.

Especially without Filius.

The pull was stronger; as she was nigh near running when she reached the Hogwarts heartstone.

_**NO!**_

Filius was a still, prone figure, lying on the ground.

Instinctively, Minerva cast her Patronus even while she reached for Filius. He was breathing. Thank God! There was a pulse, a weak, thready pulse that skipped every fourth beat. However, the Charms Master was soaking wet and too pale.

She cradled him in her arms, knowing that he was in no condition for a Side-Along trip to Poppy's realm.

"Stay with me, love," Minerva pleaded. "I cannot do this without you."


	24. Chapter 24

Filius was a still, prone figure, lying on the ground.

Instinctively, Minerva cast her Patronus even while she reached for Filius. He was breathing. Thank God! There was a pulse, a weak, thready pulse that skipped every fourth beat. However, the Charms Master was soaking wet and too pale.

She cradled him in her arms, knowing that he was in no condition for a Side-Along trip to Poppy's realm.

"Stay with me, love," Minerva pleaded. "I cannot do this without you."

The far too still figure, usually so vibrant and alive, stirred slightly and opened his eyes. When he realized who was holding him, he weakly smiled.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. His voice was so soft that Minerva could barely hear him.

"Don't… don't…waste your energy. You need to rest," Minerva protested as this sounded like a death bed confession.

"I lied," he whispered. "I never ceased loving you… Never stopped hoping… you'd let me in…" He closed his eyes, and Minerva brought him still closer to her, willing him to live because she could not bear to live without him. "When Merry died… the pain… my heart shattered... so happy… you won't know … such agony…Smart girl..."

He closed his eyes and his breathing slowed. Minerva was still clutching Filius when Poppy arrived.


End file.
